Entry 29: Forgiveness
Last night proved to be an eye opener for both Sunset and Twilight, learning of the other’s true fears. Twilight seemed a little dubious about the “slave girl” part of that vision she had, accusing Sunset of having some underlining fantasy about her that somehow made its way into the vision. Sunset’s reaction to this was blushing up to her ears and mumbling incoherently. Despite this, today was a new day, and they needed to get going.
Sunset and Twilight headed back to Tree Hugger’s shack, where the hippie girl was already ready for them. At the center of the mandala was an orange jasper like crystal, carved into the shape of six petaled lotus. Tree Hugger made a gesture for them to set, and the two girls took their positions yet again. There was some slight hesitance in their movements, even though they were able to get over their underlying fears, they were shown visions of horrible things, and that was just the first chakra!
“Sisters Sun and Twilight, are you two ready?” Tree Hugger asked.
“As ready as we’ll ever be,” said Sunset.
“Whatever we need to do, let’s do it,” replied Twilight.
Tree Hugger nodded.
“Oooooommmm…Neeeeeiiiiiigggghh…Oooooommmm…Neeeeeiiiiiigggghh…Oooooommmm…Neeeeeiiiiiigggghh…”
Sunset and Twilight focused their magical energies and let them flow into the crystal. The crystal reacted instantly, latching onto their auras and drawing them in. Within several seconds the two girls were transported into the crystalline structure, surrounded by the orange hue of the focusing crystal. The sensation felt different from that of the root chakra, but somehow similar.
“The second is the Sacral Chakra, its name is Svadisthana. This one’s element is water, it controls, creativity, pleasure, and joy, and it’s blocked by our guilt. In life we feel guilt, whether it is for something small or for something big, but if not dealt with it will consume you, and drown you in self-loathing and disgust. You must learn to forgive yourselves, or be crushed by your guilt and shame.”
Once again and dividing wall of light shot up between Sunset and Twilight, it didn’t scare them as bad this time, they figured this would happen again. But what they were worried about was what kind of vision the crystal would create to bring their guilt to light.
Sunset saw darkness, yet her body stood out, bright and glowing against the black backdrop. Suddenly a window of light opened up, it was big enough that it looked like a sixty inch TV. The window glowed and shifted, showing her a scene from her past.
It was Sunset as she was back in Equestria, Celestia - Princess Celestia - was standing before her, looking down at her with sadness.
“Sunset, why do you continue to act this way? I’ve been hearing some very unsettling things about the way you’ve been acting towards you fellow classmates at my school,” said Celestia.
Pony Sunset rolled her eyes. “Sorry if a bunch of rich, preppy ponies can’t compete with my abilities, it’s not my fault I’m better than them!”
“But flaunting it and shaming the other students? Why?”
Pony Sunset’s face scrunched in anger. “Because they deserved it! All my young life I had to deal with hearing how I wasn’t as good as them, how my parents had to work for the parents of rich foals, and hearing them use that against me whenever I walked these halls, or tried to talk to them!”
“Now the horseshoe is on the other hoof! Not only have I proven that I’m the best, I make sure and remind them of that each and every day! All that money and lineage,and yet not a one can hold a candle to me! Why shouldn’t I show them that they’ll never surpass me or even come to within a tenth of an inch of my talent?!”
Sunset hugged herself as she watched all this transpire, from this side, she could hear all the malice and misguided pride in her own voice. Did she really sound like that? Was she really so arrogant and prideful?
Multiple windows appeared around her, showing the deeds she had committed. One showed Sunset conjuring a dragon made of fire, snuffing out the flame spells of all the other unicorn students, and giving a mighty roar to scare them as she chuckled with glee.
Another showed a unicorn mare talking to her, she was smiling, and looked cheerful. Sunset remembered her, she was from a noble family and was known around the school as pretty much the nicest and friendliest mare you’ll ever meet. In a lot of ways she reminded her of Fluttershy, of course the pink mane and richer shade of yellow didn’t help the association.
Sunset remembered, the mare only wanted to be friends, if anything, she was probably the one genuine pony in the school who didn’t care about her own family’s wealth, but valued others. But Pony Sunset didn’t care, she had no interest in friends, and if she did, she never wanted them to be nobles, not the very same ones who looked down on her.
Besides, they weren’t to be trusted, the politics of such a class was always to backstab and ride the coattails of others for greater influence. Pony Sunset showed what she thought of this mare, violently using her magic to throw her against the wall and made it a point to be loud about how she didn’t care about anyone, and that they were all beneath her.
Sunset dug her nails into her arms, nearly breaking the skin as the pain of this scene struck her heart. Then the other part of this scene played out, remembering that that mare was wearing a particularly nice dress, upon which Sunset summoned a telekinetic gust of wind that slashed the dress to ribbons, exposing her. If that were done in this human world the ramifications would be greater, but that didn’t lessen the severity of the act nor the tearful eyes of that mare.
The window with her pony-self and Princess Celestia appeared again, while the others continued to play out her worst moments in silence.
“Sunset, please, I don’t like you acting this way. Why do you insist on doing these things, especially given how you’ve been given so many great opportunities to make friends?” Princess Celestia asked.
“Friends, friends, friends! That’s all you ever talk about! I don’t need friends! If I want to get stronger and better I need to learn more, push my magic further! And besides that’ll be a moot point once the Elements choose me,” said Pony Sunset.
Princess Celestia’s eyes widened. “Sunset…”
“I know about the legend, Princess Celestia, I know that one day, Nightmare Moon will return! That’s why you chose me, right?! You chose me because I’m stronger and more capable to help you in the coming battle with Nightmare Moon! The only thing that can defeat her are the Elements of Harmony, and since your sister, the former Princess Luna went mad, it left you to carry the burden of using them alone, but not anymore!”
Pony Sunset walked up to Princess Celestia, who had fallen back on her haunches in a state of dumbfounded shock.
“I can be an alicorn too! I know the Rite of Ascension lies with you! We can do it together, it’s what you’ve been grooming me for, to be a Princess and destroy Nightmare Moon!”
“Stop it…”
“Princess…?”
“I don’t want to hear such talk from you Sunset Shimmer!” Princess Celestia spoke in a harsh whisper. “I didn’t choose you because of that, I shouldn’t be so surprised, you are a bright young mare, it was only a matter of time before you pieced together the prophecy that so many have forgotten…But do not presume that is all I have planned for you, my hopes for you are bigger than that! Is that all you really seek?! To just rule?!” Princess Celestia asked.
Pony Sunset scoffed. “It wasn’t hard to put together once I figured it out, but it is the most logical outcome. I mean, c’mon, who else is better to be a Princess and rule by your side?”
“Then you miss the true nature of the Elements of Harmony, they are not a weapon of destruction, but salvation! Otherwise they would’ve just destroyed Nightmare Moon - Luna - all those years ago! So do not presume so much, and as far as I have seen, Sunset Shimmer, you have not done a single thing worthy of Ascension.”
Sunset remembered those words, they cut her deeper than any blade, and then that blade was twisted again and again. She remembered snapping at that moment, and saying things she’d regret for the rest of her life.
Pony Sunset went quiet as she backed away from Princess Celestia. “I see…and that Mi Amore Cadenza has?”
“What are you talking about,” asked Celestia.
“I know for a fact that she is not related to you by any royal blood! And yet you adopted her and called her niece because she’s an alicorn!”
Pony Sunset pointed an accusatory hoof at Princess Celestia. “So what did she do to become alicorn princess?! What ‘worthy’ deed did she commit that was so valiant and so great that it was worthy of such an honor?! Her magic seems to be centered around love from what I’ve seen, is that how she got it?! Did she have to thrill you in bed?! If that’s all that was needed then we could’ve gotten to that years ago!”
“Sunset!”
“Or maybe the rumors were true, and you were secretly screwing your own little sister!” Pony Sunset spat with venom. “So you ascended this slut of a mare and adopted her, just so you could recapture a bit of that thrill from the old -!”
Pony Sunset suddenly felt a strong strike against her left cheek, and the intense stinging sensation that followed that made her eyes water. Sunset looked to her assaulter, Princess Celestia, who had this great glare beaming down on Pony Sunset with tears in those narrowed eyes. Yet Pony Sunset did not flinch, shooting back with her own glare.
“Heh, you know what, Princess? You know what’s really sad? That this is your legacy.”
Princess Celestia’s glare broke for a moment.
“You drove your own little sister into becoming a monster because you wouldn’t give her the one thing she wanted most! To be seen as an equal, to be respected, and adored like you are! And here we are again, another blunder, the faithful student who became a total tyrant under our high and mighty Princess’ snout! Behold your second failure, Princess!”
Pony Sunset turned around and made her way to the throne room doors. Celestia was stunned, tears falling from her eyes as she quickly rose to stop Pony Sunset.
“Sunset, please wait -!”
“You know, if you want to stop me from becoming a monster, you should bust out the Elements now. It took a lot for you to just banish Nightmare Moon, can you imagine if I became a Nightmare too? So go ahead, we’ll make it a public thing, you can tell my parents why their daughter is going to be banished to another realm! Maybe the Sun since the Moon is occupied, it’d be poetic, no?”
With that, Pony Sunset continued forward, leaving the room and a crying Celestia.
“Please…I’m sorry…” Sunset whispered as she reached towards the window, trying to go to her crying mentor. “I’m so sorry…”
Suddenly the windows multiplied even more, showing Sunset in her human form. All the wicked, and near criminal acts she committed against her fellow classmates. The threats, the verbal abuse, the physical abuse, and everything in between. Another of her greatest mistakes showed itself, showing her as she singlehandedly ruined the friendships of Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity.
Sending texts and watching the mayhem unfold, chuckling like a sinister villain as each of the five friends became enemies and further divided the school. Sunset felt all the strength in her legs give out, making her fall to her knees, crying in shame of all she had done to everyone and everypony around her.
Suddenly the windows started to turn into streams of light that shout out towards the distance. The light turned into the people and ponies she had wronged, all walking towards her like an army ready to slay the terrible beast that had plagued their land.
“I deserve this…”
The people turned into water, which then melded with each other. Before long they became a raging tsunami that was hundreds of feet high. Sunset could feel it, all the guilt, all the anger, all of it would wash over her and crush her under its might, and she knew this was what she deserved for hurting so many.
“Do you really believe that?”
Sunset opened her eyes, scanning the darkness. In a flash of fire and light, a being appeared before her, and it was herself, in Firestorm form no less.
“What…What did you say?” Sunset asked.
“I didn’t stutter, I asked you: do you really believe that? That you deserve all this?” Firestorm Sunset pointed towards the raging wall of water that was getting closer.
“Of course I do! I’ve done nothing but hurt everyone around me! I don’t deserve what I have…they have every right to take it all away…”
“If that’s the case, why do you fight?”
Sunset bit her lip.
“You saw what the Organization has done, and you realized that it was what you would eventually become if you continued. You’ve changed since then, now you are on the path to redemption,” said Firestorm Sunset.
“Fighting the Organization’s not enough…it’s not enough to atone for everything I’ve done…”
“Have you forgotten that Fluttershy forgives you? That Rainbow Dash has seen past her jealousy and hate of you and seen the hero within? And how Celestia, this world’s Celestia, loves you like a daughter? She never stopped believing in the good in you!”
Sunset’s mind flashed back to those moments, Fluttershy’s forgiveness, Rainbow’s understanding and friendship, and Celestia’s love.
“Others will follow in due time, but all that will mean nothing, if you can’t forgive yourself. Let go of it, for both our sakes,” said Firestorm Sunset.
The tsunami wall was almost upon them and soon to smother them under the pressure of hundreds of tons of guilt made manifest. But then…
Sunset took a deep breath, centering herself. She then looked up to the wall of water, shifting with the various forms of all the ponies and people she had wronged, and spoke with all the sincerity and honesty in her heart.
“I’m sorry.”
The wall of water froze in place, as if time stood still. The wave then shrunk to the size of a marple and splashed on Sunset’s face, yet, when it did, a great sense of relief and weight had been lifted from her shoulders, a weight that she didn’t know she was carrying. Firestorm Sunset smiled down at Sunset and nodded her approval.
“Well done.”
“No…don’t!”
Hel was standing before Atomic Skull, her index and ring claw pointed at his forehead like a gun. Twilight tried to tear her eyes away from the sight, but it was no use, as if some unseen force glued her eyes to the scene. Black and aquamarine energy flowed through Hel’s arm and into her fingers, and within a second, the energy released.
Atomic Skull fell backwards as the bolt of energy shot through his head and ended his life then and there. Twilight cried, holding herself as the guilt welled up inside her and rose to the surface. The scene shifted and showed Twilight, Cadance, her mother, and her father standing at the burial of her big brother, Shining Armor.
“It’s all my fault…if he never took me in…if we never met, Shining Armor would still be alive if it weren’t for me…”
The scene shifted again, showing Twilight and Sunset the night they became Hel. Twilight watched herself, seeing the reactions on Sunset’s face when she pulled away, the hurt look on her face. Twilight knew she hurt Sunset, more than just because of the Hel incident, but because she made her think that her being from another world, not being human, disgusted her.
“I didn’t mean it like that…Sunset…I was just scared and…and…”
Twilight fell to her knees, feeling the guilt and pain grasp at her heart. She hurt those close to her, and soon, the evil that created her would fall upon her friends and their families. The darkness began to encroach upon Twilight, running up her legs, and threatening to cover her in its inky darkness.
“Do you honestly think that you are beyond redemption?” Twilight opened her eyes and gasped upon seeing herself in Firestorm form. “If you truly believed that, then you would’ve stopped fighting long ago.”
“How can you say that…? I…I…”
“Twilight, has Sunset, even once, said she hated you? That she wanted nothing to do with you?” Firestorm Twilight asked.
Twilight paused, searching through her memories as she played the last few weeks that had them apart from each other. There was pain in those aquamarine eyes, but there was no sign of hatred, no resentment, just loneliness, and wanting to be with the person she cared about.
“No…she didn’t.”
The darkness stopped its movement.
“And did Shining Armor ever once regret taking you in? Did Velvet and Night Light blame you for their son’s death?”
Once again, the answer was no. They all cried and mourned for the loss of Shining Armor, there was no blame, no hate, just crying, and comforting.
The darkness seemed to retreat from Twilight, but there was still something that weighed in her heart that kept the remaining inky blackness from releasing her. Firestorm Twilight knelt down before her human self and cupped the crying Twilight’s cheek gently.
“You still won’t forgive yourself for killing Atomic Skull?”
“I…I…”
“Shh,” Firestorm Twilight brought her other self into a gentle hug, rubbing her back in an attempt to comfort her, “I know it was painful, and I know Hel was out of control. But you must realize, despite her actions, however brutal, it prevented the lives of many more from being taken. You know how she is now, you know what to do when the time comes for Hel to come out again. And you won’t be alone, you’ll have Sunset.”
Twilight looked up at Firestorm Twilight, seeing the sincere smile upon her face. She was right, Sunset would be there, and this guilt about keeping herself distant from Sunset because of the rampage of Hel, it was only hurting them.
“Just let go, Twilight, forgive yourself.”
Twilight took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, feeling the pain and the guilt that had wrapped around her heart like a thorny vine release. The darkness dispersed, giving way to a brighter world, and vision of Sunset.
Tree Hugger smiled, sensing the opening of their both girls’ chakras at the same time. Using her magic yet again, Tree Hugger released both girls from the crystal’s hold and allowed them to return to the physical world.
Sunset held her head as she tried to regain some semblance of where she was. When she saw Twilight sitting across from her and Tree Hugger to her left who bowed to her and Twilight respectively. She felt lighter, like a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders, Sunset looked to Twilight again and before she could say anything, the purple girl quickly moved to her girlfriend and embraced her tightly. Sunset was taken off-guard by the sudden show of affection, but considering what they were shown, this was probably in response to the vision.
Tree Hugger watched as Sunset returned the embrace, swiftly calling back the jasper lotus crystal to her hands with the use of her magic.
“It’s not easy to forgive one’s self, but it is a necessary thing to move forward into the future, as well as into one’s relationship,” said Tree Hugger with a smile.
Embarrassed blushes colored both girls’ cheeks, but neither one broke their embrace. Such was the guilt that they harbored towards many things in their young lives was released, and now another step had been taken forward into making things right in their lives and their power. Twilight and Sunset separated from each other and turned to bow to Tree Hugger.
“Namaste,” they spoke in unison.
“Namaste my sisters. Do you want to try for the third or just call it a day? Totally cool if you want to, no need to rush.”
Twilight and Sunset looked to each other again, both could see the determination in the other’s eyes. They both nodded to Tree Hugger in affirmation that they did want to continue in opening the next chakra.
“Righteous, let’s take a break first, a little tea to calm the nerves and put a fire in the belly, ‘cause that’s the next one,” said Tree Hugger.
The hippie girl rose to her feet and began brewing a kettle of some herbal tea, Sunset and Twilight sat and watched, talking to each other about their experiences within their visions. But as they talked, a question popped into Sunset’s head, one that had been nagging at her ever since they came to their “guru’s” home.
“Tree Hugger, are you and Fluttershy…y’know, together?” Sunset asked.
“Sunset!” Twilight scolded. “That’s not our business!”
“It’s just a question, Sparky.”
Tree Hugger chuckled as she watched the tea begin to bubble. “Actually, in a way, Shy-Shy and I are together.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow at that. “‘In a way?’ How exactly?”
Tree Hugger levitated a couple of cups to her and poured the tea into them before passing the cups to Sunset and Twilight. “I met Shy-Shy while at a convention for preserving endangered wildlife. She was like a wide-eyed puppy, scampering around, curious and energetic about being around likeminded people. I was my role to help newcomers, and I was partnered with Shy-Shy. Now I’ve met a lot of people, but Shy-Shy, she had this aura that just radiated it’s own kind of magic, and whenever we got around animals, even those that would probably bite your hand off, she just went up to them and petted them, and they practically rolled over for her.”
“Not surprising, Fluttershy was always sneaking in animals into the school, and oddly enough she had pretty good control of them, like they couldn’t help but not listen to her,” said Sunset.
“Well, it’s documented that animals sense emotions of other creatures, humans especially. Fluttershy’s innate kindness must act as a pacifying presence that calms more aggressive tendencies in animals and just makes them feel safe listening to her. Might be more of an emotional language than vocal - OW!” Twilight shouted as she felt Sunset suddenly bop her on the head. “What was that for?!”
Sunset smirked as she answered, “You were going into Nerd Mode again, Sparky.”
Twilight puffed out her cheeks and went back to sipping her tea.
Tree Hugger couldn’t help but giggle at their antics, remembering how she and Fluttershy acted around each other. “Well, anyway, I do have feelings for Shy-Shy, I even kissed her.”
Sunset and Twilight just balked at Tree Hugger.
“You mean on the cheek?” Sunset asked.
“Nuh-uh.”
“On the forehead?” Twilight tried.
“Nope.”
Tree Hugger took her left finger and placed it gently on her own lips.
“ON THE LIPS?!” Twilight and Sunset cried.
The fact that Fluttershy would allow anyone to do that must’ve meant that she either really, really, really trusted Tree Hugger, or she truly had feelings for this hippie girl. But just as quickly as Tree Hugger’s happy smile appeared, it diminished slightly.
“Yeah…but I can never be with Shy-Shy, not like am.”
“Okay, what are you talking about?” Sunset asked.
“Since I was a little girl, I’ve always had a connection to the Earth’s spirit. It’s mana practically danced with me and was always by my side. But…whenever I entered a city, surrounded by steel, concrete, and lifelessness, it was like being choked…” Tree Hugger gently rested her right hand over her throat, as if remembering a phantom pain. “When I’m around Shy-Shy, I don’t feel suffocated, like Mother Earth herself resided in Shy-Shy. But whenever I was apart from her, I was like that again.”
Twilight looked dismayed at this news. “Well…the convention you mentioned, was that not in the city?”
Tree Hugger shook her head. “It was at a preserve in the next state over, surrounded by wilderness. Heh, that was a fun two weeks with Shy-Shy.”
“So you’ve stayed in contact, and she visits?” Sunset inquired.
“She does, and we do. But as far as being her life partner…that’s not good for Shy-Shy.” Tree Hugger put up a hand, seeing how both girls were about to speak. “I know what you’re going to say, but Shy-Shy doesn’t need to be weighed down by me. I am a tree, and Shy-Shy’s a bird, I’ll always be here, but she was meant to fly. To help others, animals, people, whatever she wants.”
“But…But what if Fluttershy wanted to you now! If what you feel for her is real, and what she feels is the same then -!”
“Again, I’ll always be here. If Shy-Shy wants to come and be with me, that’ll be her choice, but only after she’s done all she’s wanted. But if she finds happiness with another person…well…I’ll always be her soulmate, and she mine.”
Twilight and Sunset glanced at each other, hearing this about Fluttershy and Tree Hugger, it made them realize just how lucky they were to be this close, when those two couldn’t.
ORGANIZATION RESEARCH BASE DELTA…
[Tell me again oh Dusk Shine, why was it that my two prototypes were so thoroughly destroyed and yet you neglected to tell me?!]
Dusk Shine, wearing a visor over his eyes, worked with a 3D model of the Firestorm Matrix, piecing together things he had learned from the data he had collected on his “big sister’s” latest evolution in power. However, Professor Ivo had been constantly pestering him about the androids.
“For the last time, Ivo, your androids were lost in a battle against a Firestorm user that the Organization has been tracking down for some time now,” said Dusk.
[Curious though, I didn’t really bat an eye when you wanted to borrow both of them. One would be more than sufficient to deal with your ‘Firestorm’, but two was overkill. Still, considering the nature of your party’s business, I could see the need for it. But given the Firestorm Protocols’ abilities, I’m still at a loss as to how both my creations could be annihilated so easily. Perhaps if you shared the data…]
Dusk Shine glanced at his holographic monitor and smirked. “Now, now, Professor Ivo, you can’t expect me to just give you the data and reveal some trade secrets, do you? Besides…” With a flick of his wrist, Dusk Shine sent a small file icon to the monitor. “I have redacted the parts pertaining to the Firestorm Protocols, and left you with the necessary data for Project Amazo. Though, considering what the Firestorm Protocols can do, it may make your ‘super android’ obsolete.”
Professor Ivo chuckled. [We’ll see, Dusk Shine, it is the inevitable truth that machines will someday surpass, humanity, we’ve gone as far as we can with our evolution, it’s time for regime change.]
“Coming from a fellow human being, I find it hard to believe you want to advance the destruction of your own race. Or do you seek to be the master of these future robotic overlords? Honestly between you and T. O. Morrow, it’s like you’re trying to see who can create the better robot,” Dusk Shine queried.
Professor Ivo chuckled yet again. [And what of you? Do you believe these Protocols will truly advance human evolution? Make us ‘gods’? The Organization is only interested in war, money, and the perpetuation of both. ‘Gods’ though we could become, do you think there will be anything left when a war of gods ignites and engulfs the world? Have you ever heard of Ragnarok?]
Dusk Shine maneuvered another piece of the atomic puzzle into place, completing half of another Matrix. “Yes, but as you well know, Ivo, a new world was brought out from the ashes of the old world. Fire renews the Earth, and makes way for the strong and worthy to rise up.”
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Ivo............ IVO...... OH SHIT!
Heh, talk about role reversal, usually Sunset's the one I see flustering Twilight.
Well, Sunset has a lot of guilt about the whole She-demon thing.
That would sadly be a yes.
You had that coming.
Ouch...
Whu?
No. You're better than that, you've changed, when you obtained the power of Firestorm, you easily could have killed Twilight and taken her power. But you didn't.
She's right and I'm sure that Princess Celestia would forgive you if you simply apologized.
I figured it would be this scene.
Uh, no, pretty sure his death had nothing to do with you.
No. She can't. She's not a killer, but Atomic Skull was, if he hadn't been killed, he'd have found a way to keep fighting and keep killing.
One word away from letting me make the joke.
She has a point.
In a way? What are you, Obi Wan Kenobi?
And it's adorkable.
Ya did?
I see...
Gotcha.
Wait, Professor Ivo..., where have I heard that name before... Oh, crap that's Robotnik.
Fantastic, now we're bringing in Amazo!
Fan f*cking tastic! First Robotnik, then Amazo, and now T.O Morrow, any other curvebalsl ya want to throw at us?
I WAS F*CKING KIDDING!
nicely done; also:
Amazo? T. O. Morrow? ....you know: it suddenly occurs to me that in an alarming number of the worlds created by Michael Ravencroft that there's more DC villains, and villains in general, present then there are heroes