• Member Since 16th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Feb 19th, 2020

Ssendam the Masked

My mask protects me from gas and Internet gnomes. What's your mask?


After the daily mountain of paperwork that results from the insanity that is Ponyville, Ivory Scroll has had enough, and has made a list forbidding things that Ponyville citizens are forbidden from doing. A one shot of surprisingly epic proportions, written in the dead of night.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 266 )

Great job throwing Magic the Gathering in there im a huge fan of magic

Honeytiger demands more things be added to the list! So many things have been left out!:flutterrage:

I wrote this at twelve o'clock at night, these were all I could think about. I appreciate it, but I'll write more when I feel like it and have more inspiration.

There were a few sentences in there that didn't make too much sense, but that aside, it was a pretty funny story.

Very funny. Would a story like that which was changeling related be ok if I wrote it?

Please tell me. I'd like to know. Really. I want to improve.

Hey, I don't own the fanfiction market on this idea. Go ahead! I don't care if it's similar or different, just give it a shot!

Hell, I didn't think it would get past moderators. I just wrote this as an experiment that other people have already done in other fandoms.

[34. The Everfree Forest is there to stay. Thusly, I must request that any request to burn it down would be frowned upon by the Princess.

Yeah, I mean... what´s the deal about having a nightmarish forest full of monsters and carnivore plants just outside the town? :derpyderp2:

Ah, Skippy's List-esque ordeal. I can see this sort of thing happening in the show (and not working at all).

What you did right: writing this.
What you did wrong: not making a sequel!

More rules, please! Maybe subsequent editions focusing on the antics of specific ponies?

Please make a sequel and the resulting chaos, either as a news paper report or something else. Well if ya want to, if someone wants to, I can't write stories that well. :pinkiesad2:

Anywho, I love this story! :pinkiehappy:

Magic: The Gathering is not important enough to warrant its own castle.


It's obvious that the inhabitants of Ponyville learned how to build their houses with help from Time Turner.

I bet it took a while for you to write that list. I tend to dodge any fimfic with humans in it, as I see those spastic earth-monkeys every day at my job. Give me pony goodness (or badness:pinkiecrazy:) any day. I'm giving this an upvote.

You know, being a Mayor means she has to know all the laws. Yet, she seems to have forgotten one of the most important laws that exist: Murphy's Law.

Ivory Scroll facepalmed,

You mean facehoofed? Didn't see an anthro tag so I'd assume their normal ponies.

Ah, screw it. As soon as I feel like it, I'll add on another chapter of madness.

>Rule 34
>Involves Everfree Forest
>Dat S4 Opener

All silliness aside, this was a delightful delve into the land of...well, silliness. The jelly guy's request especially made me laugh. Nice little story here!


Shane, quit being diabolical. Someone's going to get their feelings hurt.

Oh, by the way

29. Stop sending me requests that ask me to install a strip club in Ponyville.


Thank you for linking that. That was time well spent reading. A lot of those were downright hilarious.

If you were to add more, maybe Twilight should get her own personal list for things the Princess of Friendship cannot request. (Though maybe that wouldn't quite work since Twilight would kind of overrule the Mayor.)

33. Twilight Sparkle, your library has over nine thousand books currently there. You do not need any more books.


Ivory scroll, your an idiot. Magic the gathering deserves 100 arenas!

Magic: The Gathering is not important enough to warrant its own castle.


You should really come up with your own. I'm gonna say no to that. Sorry bout that.

i would like to know what is going on with the humans

28. While musical freedom is encouraged, Cutie Mark Crusaders Glam Folk Disco Rock Musicians are not allowed to ever perform within a ten mile radius of Ponyville.

:rainbowlaugh: Make this a thing!

When making something foolproof, never underestimate the creative ingenuity of the common fool.:derpytongue2:

51. twilight was a one off thing there is no form to become an alicorn neither should you ask.

This kind of reminds me of another list of things people are not allowed to do. :rainbowlaugh:

This is why ponies are great, instead of going "hey there about a million horrible things we could do that are not mentioned on this" they go "eh" and get on with there lives. Seriously if those were the only rules in any human town there would be anarchy

My... sides... :rainbowlaugh:
This made me genuinely laugh out loud. And that is not an easy thing to do.
You have my full backing for any future developments. :twilightsmile:

Side note: Ivory Scroll and Time Turner? :rainbowhuh: Hmm, alternate namesakes. We have that a lot in MLP.
I still love how both of Dr. Whooves'/Time Turners's names reference a large fandom. :twistnerd:

The requests were cool but the paper monster was the best part. :pinkiehappy:

lol, nice list, Here's one for you
Rule 51: Pinkie, your request to install Party Cannon's in every house in Ponyville is denied. Judging by the plans you drew, it would go off every 3.4 seconds and cause severe ear trauma. Not to mention the number of complaints I'd receive for cannon induced insomnia would be incredible.

Magic: The Gathering is not important enough to warrant its own castle.

YOU BLASPHEMER! :flutterrage:


The tree of harmony lives there. It's canon.

Destroy the tree of harmony and Equestria falls.

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