• Member Since 14th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen Saturday

jkbrony


I love writing and MLP. So....I think I'm in the right place.


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Spike has since let go of the fears of being sent away by the one he cares for most, but after he falls ill, what happens when those fears begin to resurface?

Image by QueenCold

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 50 )

Such a beautiful story... :twilightsmile:

Spike loved Twilight, and he knew that she loved him. It didn't need to be said. It didn't need to be shown (beyond the occasional nuzzle). It was just...obvious.

This is the part of the show that saddens me the most. Why was Twilight able to tell the girls, who she has known for only a few months, that she loves them... but we've never heard her say it to Spike, the child she hatched and who has been part of her life the longest and who has stood by her in her darkest moments?

Every child deserves to hear those words from someone, to know that they have someone who cares about them that much, and Spike should be no different. If Twilight can't honestly say it, then we should Spike with some figure who can. Sadly, I didn't see any spot in the story where you allowed such a thing to happen, either.

I'm very, very glad that there is someone else out there who sees Spike as being raised in the Royal Nursery, and that Twilight came to spend time with him there, and Princess Celestia, too. Way too many authors, and fans in general, simply eject Spike from Twilight's early life by claiming that she was too young to care for him. But, as you point out, Twilight is not the type of pony who would hatch a child, begin its life, and then willfully walk away from it. The "Nursery Compromise", as I call it, stands out as the best way to keep her involved in his life, as we know she was, as she gave him birthday presents.

Speaking of which, you mention Twilight giving him a ball for his birthday. In Secret of My Excess he states that Twilight only gave him books for his birthdays. You may want to ret-con that by saying that it was a ball brought from the nursery or something like that.

No real issues that I saw. Like Sapphire Pancakes the writing was very clean and flowed easily. Not many noticeable errors at all. The only suggestion that I would make would be to break up the long stretches of "tell" with some minor action, like him sighing into the pillow or wrapping himself tighter in the blankets.

All in all, a well-deserved Upvote. Thanks for sharing this story with us!:twilightsmile:

AL

ooow :'D nice story

Congrats for the feature. :twilightsmile:
Nice story.

A very sweet and heart-warming tale! I've always loved the relationship between these two... Lots of devotion, but they still play off each other in different ways as well, as when Spike is put-upon to do work or his playful taunting of Twilight during Winter Wrap-up. They feel like real family as a result... and I think you captured that quite well. Good stuff!

Q_Q ;_; T_T
that was so sad! yet, so beautiful!
if u keep up this kind of writing.... damn... you'll come far in life...

I loved every bit of it... as i already said in previous chapter...
great, great work!

When I was done with the first chapter, I was so excited to see a second part. When I saw that it was just the short little scene, I thought about a special place in hell for people who get hopes up like that. It would have been a better format to just put the second scene in the first (only) chapter.

Literally my only complaint. Bravo.

Wow.

I'm truly impressed with this.

So very touching... Well done, man, well done.

~Skeeter The Lurker

3749114

Prfetty much this. Especially:

This is the part of the show that saddens me the most. Why was Twilight able to tell the girls, who she has known for only a few months, that she loves them... but we've never heard her say it to Spike, the child she hatched and who has been part of her life the longest and who has stood by her in her darkest moments?

Being that this is a children's cartoon show, we have to accept that there are a lot of things that we will never see. And that is a good thing, in some ways, as it allows us to fill in the gaps with fan canon. But shit, right here? This is the one thing that I fear may never happen, but desperately needs to happen.

I love the Twilight/Spike dynamic. That's why I had it hold such a focus in my stories. Bronies back and forth about mother/son or brother/sister, but I think Ol' Descy here says it best with "She's the big one, he's the little one." The only reason I have them use the terms brother and sister is because their relationship reminds me so much of my sister and I's.

Anywho, this was a very heartwarming tale. Probably should go back and try to break up the huge sections of Twilight's speech with some body language or some words from Spike. Hell, probably would be best to cut some bits and pieces out, just so it's not so overly telly. Beyond that, I loved it.

Have an up-vote and a fave, good sir! You certainly earned it. :ajsmug:

So many manly feels :fluttercry::raritycry::applecry:

So beautiful, I shall cement this as my head-canon hence forth.

I honestly don't know what I expected when I clicked this. I get how many people are getting "feels" from this, but the feeling is lost on me. I guess the reason behind that is that this story has been done so many times before, with Spike losing faith in his relationship with Twilight. It also doesn't help that I read a lot of those kinds of stories, as I knew what was going to happen, and therefore lost the "feels" everyone else is getting.

That is not too say that this is a horribly written story though. It is competently written, and each scene does have something behind it. The backstory with Twilight and Spike was pretty cool, and it actually could fit into the canon.

Overall, not a terribly bad story, just a very cliche one. Still deserves an upvote.

Love this story:fluttercry:.
And I like to see this possessive side of Twilight with Spike. She may not have birth his egg, but she did hatch his egg and bring to life with her own raw magical energy. Giving her and him a very special and unique connection.:moustache: :twilightsmile:

Well that was a bit overwhelming... :facehoof: Got to get these tears out of my eyes.

Nice ending. But some Spike and Twilight cuddle time would have had more feels and d'awww's to it:rainbowkiss:.

Got to love that Spilight!:moustache::heart::twilightsmile:

i was always confused on why they gave twilight spike :rainbowhuh: i bet twi came from a poor family or somthing and when she wanted to enter the school the staff was like "oh no way we're gonna let her in so we'll give her the most impossiple test ever!" and when the sonic rainboom turned her into the sith lord for a sec and she succeded they where like :rainbowderp: "ok take the dragon"

Great story! Have a like and fave!
I also have a suggestion for a story similar to this. Since Rainbow and Fluts have been together since filly's, maybe you could do a story about them just like this one?

3749114
I knew you would jump on this story, TD. If this story has your approval, then I'll give it a read. Then again, the description was enough to draw me in anyway.

Speechless. I am speechless. Well not really but still what a fantastic story. I always wanted to do a "Spike gets ill and Nurse Twilight to the rescue" story. Reading this really wants me to do it more because this inspires me.

So good to see attention to detail what should be the history of Spike and Twilight. It warms my beating heart. Instant fav and I'm telling my mates about this. Word must be spread. :twilightsmile:

Can you make another one of this?

I'm a 20-year-old dude, and right now I can still feel the tears that had started to well up in my eyes even before I attacked chapter 2. That ending was like waking up from a beautiful dream in itself. You've managed to almost make me cry. You dick. You magnificent, talented dick of an author.

:moustache:

This is a moment that the show needs desperately.

3754108

Well, If I remember what Faust said correctly, she said that the egg was a 'Kobyashi Maru' test. It was to see how Twilight dealt with failure with no anticipation that Spike would be incoming.

And again, a Spike and Twilight fic brings me to tears. I need to stop reading these at class.

3755919
I think it will happen:
One of the later episodes synopsis says something about Twilight about to go spend time with Cadence, but ends up having to take care of a sick friend while on her visit. (the way it's worded lets us know that it's not Cadence who is sick)
It's all speculation, but it's a very likely possibility, and we can hope can't we :twilightsmile:?

Comment posted by Solar Pony deleted Jan 8th, 2014
Comment posted by Solar Pony deleted Jan 8th, 2014
Comment posted by Solar Pony deleted Jan 8th, 2014
Comment posted by Solar Pony deleted Jan 8th, 2014

this was so amazing

this is how the feelz hit me

http://gifs.gifbin.com/1232547517_slo-mo-water-balloon-
to-the-face.gif

Twimom always hits the spot. Especially when it's well-written.
3754108
Kind of strange to suggest that Twilight's family would have been poor when they lived in Canterlot. I mean, I know that's assuming a lot, but honestly; they had the means to give their son formal guard training AND to give their daughter enrollment at a prestigious school. Remember, her test was to be enrolled, not to gain a scholarship.

Oh, sweet Celestia! This was great! I absolutely adore these kinds of stories! They're so cute and sweet! You should do one where Spike has to take care of Twilight while she's feeling ill. I was actually thinking about doing a story similar to this idea.

3755919 I completely agree! The show is completely lacking in cute/sweet moments like this.

Aw, Twimom brings a tear to the eye.:twilightsmile:

Touching, and the emotions feel real. Really worth reading :moustache:

wow that story was fantastic! i actually choked up at some parts! i felt so sorry for spike! D:
but great story hope to see more from you :D

soooooooooo.... who want's a hug?:twilightblush:

Emotions, so many emotions - a wonderfully written Twimom story combined with a bit of backstory, I like this story very much :scootangel:

Got to love sibling moments, a very solid and well thought of read, I highty enjoyed it, thank you:derpytongue2:

This was spectacular.

The story is simple and yet completely relatable. I loved the set up for this story, it was just so brilliantly done. The little scenes with Spike was just brilliant. You were able to capture Spike's fear of failure so very well and you were able to capture Twilight strength and motherly-love, so very well.

I loved the scene with the aftermath of Twilight hatching Spike. I could just see that so easily in my mind and it felt right with the tone of the show. I really enjoyed that and I felt that you captured the relationship between the two so very well.

I do question the red ball on Spike's birthday, but that's nitpicking at best.

I loved this story. It was well written, it was well executed, and it fit within the shows style and I loved it. The plot was simple, but it was solid and really that's all it needs to be and it worked well for this story. A great fic, I can't wait to read more from you in the future. Take care. :pinkiehappy:

You were sucking on your tail, and you were only doing so because I had brought you into the world.

...

Another great story from a great author! I just finished getting up to date on 'wear flowers in your mane', you sir are great at making this type of story.

as many have said before , this Vic really does feel nice cusse it touches on spike and Twilghts motherly side . I mean the show somewhat touches the twi bring a mommy mostly you just see him told as if assistant instead of son .

Great story

Yeah what they said.

I loved this story. I always sort of considered Twilight to be like Spike's mother. She hatched him. More importantly she was the very first living thing Spike laid his eyes on upon hatching. So the way I see it it's only natural to write them as mother and son. Not sister and brother.

I just wish the show would give a bigger nod to Twilight and Spike's relationship as mother and son. Rather than simply abusing Spike for comedy. My hooves are crossed for season 7. Maybe we'll get a "Spike's Parents" episode?

This was written with a lot of passion. It all showed through brilliantly. I absolutely loved this story. It's going in the favorites.

Man, I wish an episode like this would air for Twilight and Spike.

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