pegasister 22 enjoys big mac stories,luna ships,and dislestia ships
Big Macintosh has no friends until Treble score comes to town, and what behavior some might think inappropriate, Mac doesn't understand.
Ships included:
Mac x Treble
AppleDash
TwiPie
Sparity
Delishpie- Red Delicious x Marble Pie
DisLestia-Discord x Celestia
Dj Pon3(Vinyl Scratch) x Octavia
And many more
Cmc will get cutie marks!
Blueblood will get what he deserves!
Pinkie's family visits!
And Luna gets less socially awkward.
All this and more coming in
Song for Big Macintosh
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Ik it's not much yet but i have arthritis in my hands and I'm typing this on my phone so please bear with me. <3
I love you all.
:)
Place // is what they were talking about
Capitalize names of places
that Should be ( And when my head stopped spinning, I saw we had stopped at a wooden fence. )
the flow is interrupted here.
3659744
I think I meant it to refer to the situation as a whole for treble, being a place to stay, a job, and ponies to become friends with.
But I believe either works in the context.
This is a very good concept for a story and I know you will improve (even with arthritis) your writing throught this.
Make those chapters longer, put some more time into it.
And don't make the same mistake I did
Get a proofreader! :D
I hope ur writing/typing more
3718887 I am, but the amount of time i cab get on a laptop is limited. Ive got 12 chapters written though.
Wow.... Um.... Quite short. Of course it's the prologue. It's supposed to be.
Okay so there were a lot of grammar issues you should take care of and the chapters, well you might wanna make 'em 1k words long at least so they aren't too short. Not too bad all in all though.
3803465 i fixed most of them, i think. thanks for your feedback and please let me know if there's anything else you think i need to fix. :fluttershy: if that's ok with you, that is.
3687346 thanks for your support.