A Change of Pace

by Discord_Nations

The Journey Begins

“Get out! You are no longer welcome here! You have broken one of our longest standing traditions. You will no longer call this place your home.” Spoke the leader of the clan. “By the blood oath you swore we have, by all rights, to execute you. But I feel it is a more fitting punishment that you wander the earth until the day you die. Living with your mistake.” I turned and walked toward the door, knowing full well that I could never return to the place I called home. I stepped out of the small metal building that was the center of our village, and into the cold, dark autumn night.

I made my way to the outskirts of the village to my small home. As i walked through the small village, I was thankful that there weren’t many people out to stare daggers into me. Though I am sure that they would be more than willing to do so with actual daggers. But when i was closer to my house and I saw one person out there, one that I wished not to see, my brother’s wife, about 10 yards from me. Even from this distance I could tell that she had sent most of the nights since my brother’s death crying. I never thought I could ever see so much sorrow in a person’s eyes that was usually so happy.

She saw me pass and motioned for me to come over. Not wishing to inflict any more pain onto her i obliged. I slowly walked over, never meeting her eyes. I swear i could feel the temperature drop the closer i got to her. But rather than one that could kill you on the spot, it was that of pain, sadness, and pity. As i finally reached I managed to raise my eyes to meet hers. The usually clear emerald like eyes were bloodshot and puffy from long nights of crying, as well as her brown hair was disheveled and looked like a hand had hastily been run through it.

She took a deep breath and slowly let it out before speaking. “I know what you did was not in cold blood, but rather in anger. But I don’t know if I can ever forgive you for what you’ve done.”

“I don’t expect forgiveness from anyone, Veronica. Not even from myself. This is something that I will live with til the day I die. I can’t blame you if you want me to be imprisoned and burn in the pits of hell.” I replied

“Alex, you are a kind and caring soul who had acted hastily upon the situation.” She replied softly, “I know you well enough, that had Richard not acted so harshly, that you wouldn’t have done what you did. I don’t hold you at fault alone.”

“But it was ultimately my decision that costed him his life, can you truly say you don’t blame me alone?” I replied.

“Yes.” She answered after a moment of thought, “From what i heard that happened, Richard wasn’t in his right mind. Those actions aren’t like him. He would never say or do such things. Something was wrong with him. It still pains me to have him gone, but he was miserable in the state of mind that he was.”

“How do you know for sure?” I replied flatly.

“Because of all the nights we spent talking,” She spoke softly and carefully. “There are some things I know that you won’t. But it is getting late. You should be on your way.” She started to turn around and walk into her home, but she stopped as she opened the door, “Oh and Alex,” I turned to meet her gaze, “Be safe” She said in a soft, kind tone. Then she stepped into the house that her and my brother once lived in together without another word.

“I will never understand how she actually manages to talk to the guy who killed her husband and say ‘Be safe’. Makes no sense to me” I thought bitterly. She somehow managed to make me feel worse after that conversation. “I deserve no forgiveness.” With that i started the walk towards my house again.

As I walked into my house i started to get everything together. I packed what clothes I had, some food rations that wouldn’t spoil anytime soon, and I put on my suit of steel armor, slung my shield and greatsword over my back, and my long sword at my side. I reached for my pistol, but I pulled my hand back. Remembering what I had done.

“I will not hold such a thing again.” I said with a low tone, almost a whisper. Tears coming to my eyes while i stood there, each second vivid in my mind, playing back in slow motion. The moment I had pulled it out, aimed it straight at my brother and pulled the trigger. The bullet had pierced his chest and through his heart. I can never forget the look in his eyes. Fear, shock, and pain. Death quickly overtaking an signs of life left in his body. The one time I lose my temper and it’s burned into my mind, instead of being hazy. The wound leaking blood and slowly pooling around his body, the color slightly faded from his face, and the expression he had when he had been shot stayed there. As if to let it meld itself into my memory.

I only now realize I am on the ground, shaking, sobbing uncontrollably while the tears poured down my face and landed on the metal on my legs. “Damn it.” I punched the ground. “Damn it, damn it, DAMN IT!” Each time I said it i slammed my hand into the ground below me. Punching harder each time until i felt my knuckles going numb. Still in a fit of rage I looked around me and stared at the dresser that was next to me. “As good as anything else in this damned place to break” I snarled. Before I knew it my hand flew out and slammed into the dresser, cracking the wooden frame. The sound of shattering glass near me snapped me out of my fit of rage. I looked down to see the frame that held the photo of me and my brother, when we were going out hunting, with the front glass broken. With my eyes still filled with tears I slowly took the photo out of the frame and placed it in my bag. I stood on my still trembling legs.

As i started to leave my home, i put my helmet, marked with the crest of our clan onto a pike outside my house. This showed that I had no connection left with this place, and that I will never be able to return. “I will never forget what I did to you brother, and I definitely won’t let myself lose my thoughts to anger, and I will never spill the blood of another innocent.” I promised myself. “ Though i wonder how long I shall be able to live with this regret…. this… pain.” With that i set out into the night along the dirt path that lead out of town.

After about 3 hours of walking I started to look for a place to camp. But something caught my eye. I was a small shadow, but nothing that looked big enough to worry about. Looking about the desert plains i saw before me with mountains in the distance, or what was left of them, I decided to look at the large chasm in the ground near the village. They may not want me there, but strange noises have been known to come from this thing. I’ll be damned to the deepest reaches of hell if I were to let anything come out of this thing the night i leave.

As I started to walk towards the chasm I took a closer look around the once lush waste lands we now call home. The world has been ravaged by war for centuries, explosions, bullets, missiles, everything you could think of. Most of us have been able to get by. While others roamed the wastes trying to find a place to call home. I suppose I will be one of those people now. The chasm getting closer, a deep hole left from the movement of the tectonic plates caused this to appear here, I heard something as I got closer to it. The sound almost seemed like singing, but I wasn’t entirely sure. But it was a heavenly tune, one that I had never heard in this desolate place where I lived. I got closer to the edge and peered down the large chasm. There was a faint glow of light. I just wrote it off as magma. But the noise got louder, and it was indeed singing. I sat there, mesmerized by the song that graced my ears, not wishing to move from this spot. I wished to hear it closer, but I wasn’t even able to see the bottom. After I decided that nothing would be coming from this thing and had my fill of the song emanating from it I decided to get up and look for a place to camp for the night.

As I turned around I caught a faint glimpse of a reflection out in the distance, and as soon as I did i heard a loud shot go off. Before I knew it my armor had been hit, hard, luckily I had my armor made to be bullet proof. “Shit!” I yelled, not feeling the bullet pierce my skin was always a bonus. Still hurt like a son of a bitch let me tell you. But then I started to fall backwards, down the deep chasm, the singing getting louder. At first stunned I didn’t have anyway to react, but then my mind got a hold of what happened after a few seconds. “So… this is how it all ends, huh?” I laughed bitterly despite falling down what seemed to be an endless pit that ended who knows where, “Well I got what I deserved, at least I know I will see you again soon, brother. I only hope you can forgive me when I see you again.” I closed my eyes and decided to enjoy the singing that got louder the longer I fell. I fell unconscious before I hit the bottom.