Whiskey Lullaby

by Smitty91

Chapter 1

Whiskey Lullaby

Rarity held her breath in silent awe as she stared down at the purple dragon lying face-down in his basket. Clutched in his hand was a note. She hesitated before lifting the note up to where it was eye-level with her and reading it. Her mouth dropped, but she otherwise did not move. She continued to read the note over and over again. The note fluttered down to the floor as the light blue aura surrounding it suddenly disappeared, and she continued to stare down at the purple dragon before her, mouth agape.

She wasn't entirely sure of how to react to what she was seeing. Perhaps it was all just a dream. Yes, that was it; this was all just a horrid nightmare. Pretty soon she would awake in her bed, protected by her bed sheets. Opalescence would be at the foot of her bed, curled up in a little ball. Any moment now she would wake up; all she had to do was concentrate. She closed her eyes and pictured herself in her bed, safe and warm.

She opened her eyes and realized that this was not a dream; this was real. Everything that she was seeing right now was real. With this realization, she had no other choice but to act. She should at least make sure that he was still alive. She gently nudged him, not getting any response. She nudged him a bit harder. Again, no response. Finally, she gently rolled him over to find that his eyes were closed. A sad look was on his face. Her worry overcame her. Maybe he was just sleeping. If he was, then his chest would have been rising and falling in time with his breathing, and it wasn't. Maybe Twilight would be able to deduce what was wrong with him. If he wasn't breathing, then that surely meant that he must be . . .

She shook her head. No. She wasn't going to think that way. She would remain positive. He couldn't be dead. He just couldn't be! If he was, she didn't think she could live with herself. She wouldn't be able to live with the consequences. What would her friends think of her when they learned that she was, pretty much, the sole cause of his demise? They would abandon her, wouldn't they? They would stop speaking to her. If such was the case, she wouldn't blame them if they did. If she was in fact the cause behind this, then she was no better than a murderer.

She paced back and forth across the library, her hoofbeats echoing off the wooden walls that made up the room that Twilight and Spike shared, her anxiety getting greater and greater the longer she waited. Where on Earth was Twilight?! She sighed and fell on her haunches, looking down at the floor as a single tear ran down the right side of her face. The lump in her throat bobbed up and down as she struggled to get a hold of her emotions. She couldn't let her dark thoughts get the best of her, at least not until she was certain that the worse had come to pass.

Once Twilight finally arrived at the library, Rarity practically sprinted down the stairs to the main entrance, nearly running into Twilight in the process. She skidded to a halt in front of her.

Automatically, Twilight suspected that something was wrong purely by the terrified look on Rarity's face. She cocked her head to the side. “Rarity, what is it?” She didn't even need to ask if something was wrong.

It took a moment for Rarity to get her emotions in control before responding. She almost burst into tears, but kept the waterworks in check, at least long enough to tell Twilight what was going on. “It's Spike. Something's wrong with him.”

Twilight sped past Rarity, knocking her back on her haunches while she raced up the stairs to her bedroom to find that Spike was lying on his back, eyes closed, a sad expression plastered on his face. She didn't move even when she heard Rarity come up the stairs. “Did you find him this way?”

Rarity nodded her head. “Yes. I wasn't sure about what to do, so I waited for you to get here. What do you think, Twilight? What's wrong with him? Is he . . .” She hesitated to even say it, much less think it. “Dead?”

Twilight swallowed hard at the very suggestion. She gave Rarity no response; she simply lowered her head towards Spike, pressing her ear against Spike's chest. It felt as if she was trying to swallow a pebble when she realized that his heart wasn't beating. She gulped and immediately began attempting to perform CPR, to no avail. Her breathing became heavier as she attempted CPR repeatedly with no results. The tears came as she finally broke down and began crying. She was comforted as Rarity nuzzled her cheek.

***

Rarity stood silently, watching Spike's coffin being buried underneath the tree that she and her friends stood under, along with many friends and family that either knew Spike or came to show their condolences. She looked across from her where Applejack and Rainbow Dash stood. Both were glaring, luckily not at her, but at the tombstone that lay directly underneath the tree.

Neither she or her friends had spoken much within the past few days. They hadn't even visited one another to see how the other was doing. They had all kept to themselves, each one of them dealing with the tragedy in their own way. It was almost funny in a way, as they usually attacked problems together as a team, a family. When it came right down to it, they were more than best friends: they were a family. Families were supposed to stick together and support each other, but it seemed as if Spike's death was slowly but surely making it so that they didn't want to be around each other.

She was curious as to how the others were coping with the recent tragedy that had befallen them. Of all the things that they had been through during their friendship, this was probably the hardest thing that they had to go through. Of course they all knew that each of them would die eventually, one right after the other, but none of them expected one of their own would die so soon in such a swift manner. It was quite surreal, like a horrid nightmare that would never end.

The burial came to a close and the group went their separate ways, as if none of them wanted to be there any more than the other did. Rarity watched as her friends went off in different directions, not saying a word to one another. She turned her head, choking while watching her friends quickly run. Rainbow Dash fired off like a rocket across the sky, leaving an iridescent streak behind her in her wake, her tail and mane flapping in the breeze.

If anyone had been affected by this tragedy, it was definitely Twilight; she had been the one closest to Spike, after all. This struck Rarity as odd, as she suspected that she should have been the one most affected by Spike's death, seeing as how she was the first one to find him dead in the library. In a way, she was just as much affected by his suicide as Twilight. A bottle of whiskey lay near his basket, the cause of death being alcohol poisoning. He had literally drunk himself to death, the alcohol consumption being too much for his small body.

Twilight had no reason to feel guilty regarding Spike's death, seeing as how he wasn't mad at her for any reason, Rarity realized as she sat at her kitchen table drinking some hot coffee. If anyone felt guilty, it was her. She could still recall the incident that, more than likely, led to Spike's depression and alcoholism.

***

She had been busy working on one of her latest fashion designs. Ribbons were snipped and measurements were taken. Designs were drawn and redrawn repeatedly, most ending up crumpled in the trashcan when they didn't meet her satisfaction. She heard the door open and close, but merely dismissed it as Sweete Belle leaving to do some crazy experiment with her friends in order to earn her cutie marks. After a second or two, she went back to her work. It was only when she heard a small cough that she turned. She was taken aback to see Spike standing behind her. Looking down, she noticed an envelope in his hand.

She swallowed. “I'm afraid this isn't the best time, Spike. I'm busy filling an order. Is this important?” She lifted a hoof to adjust her glasses.

He swallowed and took a step back, looking somewhat hurt by her statement. He looked down at the envelope in his hand. He jumped when the envelope was suddenly lifted from his hand, cast in a light blue aura. He watched as she merely glanced at the envelope and dismissed it as yet another order before setting it aside. She once again addressed him, asking him if he wanted anything.

He shook his head and replied softly, “No.”

She nodded. “Very well. May I please go back to work, then?”

He bit his lip. “Y-Yeah. S-S-S-Sure.”

She smiled at him and gently patted him on the head before turning back to her mannequin and continuing to do her work.

***

She sighed, recalling the memory. She took another sip of her coffee, but immediately spat it back into the mug upon realizing that the coffee had gone cold. She set the mug down and pushed it away from her, resting her hoofs on her cheeks as she leaned forward, looking straight ahead.

She recalled the envelope that Spike had had with him when he'd entered her shop. She hadn't opened it. She hadn't even so much as glanced at it since the dragon's passing. How could she have been so stupid? Spike didn't deliver orders for her. Why had he come to the boutique that day anyway, if not to give her an order to fill? Maybe it was important.

She went in the room where she did her business, stopping when she approached the table where the envelope lay, where it'd laid since the day Spike had come in her shop. Slowly, she used her magic to rip open the envelope. A rolled up piece of parchment fell onto the table. The envelope was flipped over to see her name written in cursive on the front. It was set aside on the table, the light blue aura replacing the envelope for the letter. The letter was levitated up so that it was at eye-level with her. She started to read . . .

Dearest Rarity,

Words cannot express my gratitude to you for teaching me about the meaning of love, about what it means to love someone unconditionally. Sure, Twilight and I are very close to each other. You know as well as I do that I'd do anything for her, but I hope that you know that I'd do anything for you as well. I love you and the rest of my friends dearly. But you . . . I love you most of all. I know you don't feel the same way I do about you, so I don't expect you to return my feelings for you. But, I do hope that you will grant me the common courtesy to at least consider me as more than a friend. I know you don't think this way, but I really think you and me could be happy together. Just think about it and get back to me whenever you can.

Love from,
Spike

She read the letter over and over again, each time getting more choked up than the last. The letter fluttered to the floor as her magic released its hold on the parchment. She watched it fall to the floor and continued staring at it for a full minute or so before finally falling into a crumbled heap on the floor, softly sobbing to herself.

Oh, how stupid she'd been! He hadn't been giving her an order to fill; he had been giving her a very heartfelt love letter, and she'd just cast it aside as if it were nothing! No wonder he'd looked so distraught afterward. She should have known that the letter meant something to him, that she meant everything to him. How could she have been so blind?!

Her sobs began to come in soft whimpers while she picked herself up off the floor. Her legs wobbled as she struggled to regain her composure, but found that this was a lot harder due to the emotional weight that had been hoisted onto her back. She bit her lip in an effort to keep in the guilt-ridden scream that she so desperately wanted to be let out. When she kept it in, she felt her stomach knot up. Her chest felt tight. Was this what it felt like to keep one's emotions bottled up inside? Oh, God, it felt ghastly! How did anypony live with themselves with these horrible feelings weighing them down? She visibly cringed when the feelings began to make her sick to her stomach. She realized that she would need to consult somepony, anypony, in order to rid her of these horrible feelings.

She supposed that the pony that she should talk to first was Twilight. After all, Spike had been her number one assistant, and losing him had probably dealt her a terrible blow that was more than likely more devastating than how Rarity felt now.

Author's Note:

Constructive criticism is appreciated.

Comments

[Xatile of Morgon]

this story is based off of the song. am i right?