Isaiah, a young man fresh out of college with nothing to show for it, wishes that he could have a new life in a better world. Now his dream has come true and he has been transported to Equestria. Unfortunately so has the rest of his neighborhood, and not everyone is as excited to be there as he is. With unexpected complications causing tempers to flare will Isaiah be able to keep the peace between his neighbors and the ponies of Equestria, or will Isaiah's dream become a nightmare?
Chapters (2)
Just a heads-up, there's already a fic by this name.
3925553 Dang
Do you think I should change it? Are the stories similar?
3925557 Nah the other one is a completely different concept, so you should be fine plot-wise. :3 Up to you if you want to change the title, I just thought you should know.
I like this story a lot keep it up
3925704 Thanks! I will
Nice concept, just watch it with some things here and there. Keep it up
3926151 Could you be more specific about which things I should watch?
I would not be a happy camper if that happen to me in my neighborhood.... sorry but true I love my family to much to leave them forever like that so I would be a little angry. I do like the concept~!
The idea seems interesting, but the presentation detracts from it. The biggest problem is with punctuation, which is all over the place. I especially noticed the frequent comma splices, missing punctuation at the ends of sentences, and incorrect punctuation at the end of dialogue. You might want to have a look through the site's writing guide for some information on fixing those issues. It's also lacking in descriptive elements, making it difficult to visualize some scenes, and the formatting inconsistently jumps between having indentation and not having it.
I recommend finding an experienced editor to help you smooth out these issues. That can sometimes be the difference between a forgettable fic and a truly special one.
3926181
I think it's just me but I feel like he's taking this with no questions at all. Hell I'd be wondering why this happened or, if I was somehow responsible for these actions. But that may just be me
I'm liking this so far as well!
Upvote and a fave to you good sir!
Interesting so far but could use some fine tuning. I noticed a few issues with homophones and your dialogue needs some serious love. You don't need 'he/she said' after every sentence, especially if it's just two people talking. Also, I don't think I noticed a single action tag anywhere.
You sir, you get a like just for the concept.
And it was the wrong neighborhood, motherf*cker(not implied to be an offense to you, I'm talking generally)
OH MY GOSH..... BEST STORY IDEA EVEEEEERRRRRRRRRFR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
must have MOOOOOORE
3930996 it's austin that doesnt have a job
Somebody's been reading this series http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grantville_(1632_series) haven't they now?^_^
Sweet Celestia IT LIVES!
5228952 My thoughts exactly. I'm guessing there's a language barrier here, judging by the writing.
IT'S NOT DEAD YET! IT'S FEELING BETTER!
Ah, so it's gonna be one of those fics, is it?
9235575
dude this story has been dead since 2014 lmao
9235986
True, but that doesn't mean you can't be skeptical of bs when you see it ;)