• Member Since 20th Jun, 2012
  • offline last seen 18 hours ago

Starwin


Writer of stories!

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Many stories have been passed down throughout the ages. Some have become myths, others legends. Some are fondly remembered and celebrated every year. But many have turned into fairytales, with no pony who remembers their truth.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 15 )

Great story. I would love to see more of these legends you have written.

I thought it was pretty good, until the ending, then I though it was brilliant. :twilightsmile:

The ending really made this one work. As I was reading the bulk of it, I was thinking, "Ooh, that's some nice world-building; the pacing is a little rushed, and I'm not sure how well it fits with canon, but it has a nice, fairy-tale feel to it". And them BAM! you did the thing. I like how you left the factuality of the account unclear. I also liked that you worked Sombra into it, as well as your version of the elements' origin. And there's certainly a logic to the existence of Terra.

It was well-written, too. A few comma issues (which I seem to remember seeing in your other stories from time to time), as well as this:

Long ago, when the world was old with all its life still young three stars came down from the sky. They did not fall nor hurry in their dissent.

Should be "descent".

P.S. - It's a shame your other story is starting to look iffy, but I am looking forward to VoT2. (Also, 9 iterations?! :pinkiegasp:)

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Thank you very much, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I might 'add-on' to this with some of the other stories I have written. But now that the audience knows they are stories being told by Twilight, I'm not sure how interesting they will be. Maybe.

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Your comment made my day. I'm glad you liked it. I really wasn't sure what readers would think of the ending. I went back and forth about posting this story but ultimately, the last section made me laugh every time so I decided to just go for it.

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Corrected, thank you very much :twilightsmile:

As to too many commas, I, have, no, idea, what, you (comma) mean :rainbowwild: Yeah I do over abuse them a bit (*cough* understatement *cough*), but what can I say, it just seems to work well for me and only a few readers find them really distracting. Mostly they are there because one of my editing tools is a text to speech application. It doesn't like to naturally pause where I think it should (or rather, where I pause when I read out loud to myself). Could I cut back on them, maybe, but where's the fun in that! :twilightsheepish:

As to the other story I wanted to do this year, I like the idea, I like the concept, I like the characters and I really like the plot. But wow, is it ever boring to read. It starts exciting, gets really slow, then really really slow, then exciting again. The trouble is, without redoing the whole thing... again... I'm not sure how to fix the middle (in truth, I'm not even sure it can be fixed). But, who knows, maybe a moment of insight will attack my brain.

Yep, I've had so many false starts on VoT2. Some seem like they might be okay, one, which I shared in the unpub, I really, really like, but I've just had a terrible time trying to get to work. I think this attempt might be the one though, it is the furthest along I have ever gotten on it. Now, I just have to be sure to end it this time with no possibility of a sequel.:twilightsheepish:

Wa-BAM. That's the sound of the gold star I just smacked onto this story. I love worldbuilding, and I like what you did with the three sisters (though I've never thought of them as gods necessarily, nor as having more than Celestia and Luna). But you made Terra work, and it was kind of hilarious how the appearance of the newest god suddenly made things less mythical and more immediate. He does have a way of changing the tone of any scene he's in.

Good job! I'll try to finish up Shadow of the Sun as well, since I haven't yet. :ajsleepy:

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Now, I just have to be sure to end it this time with no possibility of a sequel.:twilightsheepish:

Oh gawd, you're gonna kill them all off, aren't you? :raritywink:

Who's the third goddess?

Ah, I love the mythical qualities of it!

Ooh, a wood goddess to go with our Day and our Night.

Mm. Jealous Sombra. Oh, greedy Sombra. Hm.

Oh, well, earth goddess, well, eh... same diff, I suppose.

I haven't seen any S4... is Terra technically a spoiler? (No, wait, don't answer that; it doesn't count as a spoiler if I don't know whether it's a spoiler. Crap. Um... yeah, I'll stand by that. No spoiling the spoiler.)

It'd probably be cool to see more of your myths & legends. But if you don't want to share, that's cool too.


I'm constantly surprised at finding miniscule technical errors in your fics, probably because I have such an easy time ignoring them (and finding a mental fix, where needed). That came out wrong. It's like they're there, but I don't care that they're there. Does that make sense?

Which is kinda my leadin to saying I spotted some errors, but decided I wasn't going to point them out unless you asked me to.


I wonder what Twilight would do with an anthology, or something like the Book of Virtues. It's not designed to be read cover-to-cover, so...

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Nope, no spoilers in this fic at the time I wrote it. I can't speak for future episodes, but that would just be coincidence if a character called Terra showed up. The name just fits with Sun, Moon and Earth.

As to technical errors. You might have guessed by now (but maybe not), I simply don't give them as much attention as other things. Not to say I ignore them, but I only have so much time to devote to writing (and editing) and, especially where free content is concerned, sometimes close enough is good enough.

As long as the idea comes across, the sentence is readable and the technical error doesn't distract most readers then I'm at lot less concerned with them over say, creating gaping plot holes (which I love to do).

However, if readers want to point them out (which is my next stop over on your comments for FoM (thank you :twilightsmile:)) I am certainly willing to consider and implement them if they make sense.

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She would probably read it cover to cover anyway. At least, that's what I did with the Book of Virtues and most of the anthologies I've read. So, does that mean that not everyone always reads stories in order?

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Well, as a rule I like to read things start to finish, but with something like the Book of Virtues the entries bear almost no relation to each other (besides of course thematic), so it's not like it'd make a difference, right?

I love it so much!!!!!!! Actually, if you're taking requests now, could you please do a sequel to it? One where Twilight asks Celestia about the book? Thanks!

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