• Member Since 15th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 19th, 2017

Obselescence


[center]Bye guys[/center]

E
Source

When all hope seemed lost, six ponies came together to form an unbreakable bond. In one swift stroke, the magic of friendship defeated Nightmare Moon and saved Princess Luna from the shadows...

But still the night remained.

A collaborative work with the immeasurable Eakin.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 86 )

Well, I do pride myself on being difficult to measure.

Oh, and Alternate Ending

Been a pleasure working on this story with Eakin, as always.

Hope you guys like it as much as we do.

3479420>>3479423 Indeed I do. Very well done.

I liked this story. I wasn't so sure about this at first, but I got pulled in. Good job, here's a happy Pinkie Pie for you :pinkiehappy:

Do I die and become a hero, or do I live long enough to see myself become the villain?

...Sorry. The title made me think of it.

3479487

Luna isn't the Princess Equestria needs, but she's the one it deserves.

Listened to dis while readin.

3479491 (x [where x = placeholder pony]) merely adopted the dark. Luna was born in it, molded by it. She didn't see the light until she was already a mare. By then, it was nothing to her but blinding!

An excellent one-shot. Some very nice interaction between two of my favourite characters, and an intriguing alternate universe. I like how you didn't go into too much detail one what happened before and after the fact. It's probably why I like Obs's one-shots so much, really.

“Do you think you are the only one who misses her?” Luna demanded. “Is that it?” She was crying now in earnest. Her breath came in short, ragged gasps and her eyes were blurred by tears.

I think this is the first time that a breakdown like this ^ has ever changed my view of a character entirely during a story. Like, I probably should have expected it, but it had a lot of impact nonetheless. Great job, you guys!

Also, I'm curious: what is your method for collaborating?

Have my like

and my fave

and all my tears

<3

3479512

We take turns writing arbitrarily long bits of the story, generally determined by "All right, I think I'm about done with my turn now." After that, we go through it and write a bit over what we put down to equalize the styles.

Seems to work out pretty well!

3479512
Typically it's something like:

Write outline together after bouncing ideas around over Skype or Steam-> Obs writes two pages -> I get a notification that it's my turn -> week of procrastination -> I write two pages -> Pass baton back, receive notice two days later it's my turn again -> week of procrastination -> Write two pages -> repeat until finished.

3479528>>3479521

Thanks for the replies. I'll have to consider doing like that in future.

Gaaaaay

Wow. Powerful stuff, guys. And a glimmer of hope at the end. Great. Not too dark to overshadow the true conflict, but grim enough to show the seriousness.

I approve of this collab thingsmadoobaber. Swell idea, might wanna try reviving mine and Sharaloth's...

* Raises hand

Question: If the unicorns raised the sun before alicorns, why can't they do it now?
Also: Could Twilight become princess of the night while Sunset Shimmer became princess of the day?

3479639

It's a thing we (or I, at least, dunno about Eakin) thought about addressing in the story, but somehow it just never managed to work its way in. My best guess is that the secret has been lost to time, given that the unicorns' method of raising the sun (without sacrificing the focal point of their power, hopefully) seems to have predated Celestia and Luna.

Also: Probably.

3479528
3479521

This was a truly excellent tale. The beginning seemed odd at first; I had a glimmer of what was going on, but it wasn't clear - and when it all snapped into place later on the gradual intro with all its hints became a thing of beauty.

There are a lot of excellent exchanges here, but the one that really set the hook deep was this:
"You could not hope to channel such energy safely.”
A heavy silence filled the room. “That... wouldn’t be a deal-breaker”

I didn't even have to read the next few words (and it was hard to do so anyway what with the tears springing up in my eyes). That moment, like so many in this story, was perfect.

Thanks again for putting your work out here to be read and pondered and critiqued. I look forward to reading more by either or both of you.

Light and laughter,
SongCoyote

3479639

Question: If the unicorns raised the sun before alicorns, why can't they do it now?

Some ideas: lack of organization; loss of the knowledge required to do so; change in the Sun since Celestia took over; some other reason.

3479668

I've always assumed that due to apparently harsher living conditions and enemies everywhere they turned, the ponies back in the olden days were built of much tougher stuff. Likewise, the unicorns had a great deal more magic and magical knowledge as opposed to most unicorns only knowing basic levitation and a little magic tied to their special talent.

Then the heavens would be shifted on the day/night axis through some sort of grand ritual involving quite the number of powerful unicorns focusing their magic together.

That or it was a total lie, Celestia and Luna hadn't exposed their existence to the ponies yet, and the unicorns were taking advantage of the Pegasi and Earth Ponies' lack of magical knowledge to say that they themselves controlled the heavens and used that as their bargaining chip to keep the Pegasi from conquering them and the Earth Ponies supplying them.

Feelings. Much feelings.

... Oof.

This was rather fantastic. Cherish it,

3479420
If you're going ante an "Alternate Ending" with that song, I'm going to have to raise you with this one, and play Queen Sparkle to your Twilight and Starswirl.

3479521
You two are fantastic collaborators. I haven't read a great deal of your stuff yet, but most of Eakin's, and it's remarkably difficult for me to tell where the points of transition are.

3479420, 3479668

Another awesome story. I particularly like the way you've developed Luna's emotional state. Well done!

Hmm. Okay, cool, see ya.

Why do you tease us? Only providing one-shot after one-shot?

3479668
While reading, I'd thought the nature of Celestia's link to the sun had killed the star with its mistress, which would explain the absence of moonlight.

In any case, an exquisite piece of tragedy, recovery, and the faint glimmer of hope. Thank you both for writing it.

That tiny glimmer of hope at the end.

This was excellent. Props to both of you. .

3480392

Also possible.

3480381

This one was a collab, so it sort of makes sense that it'd be a once-off.

In general, I do a lot of one-shots because I tend to conceptualize fics as very compact bits of story, and everything sort of begins and ends where I feel it needs to.

Also because I'm kind of bad at keeping focused and doing one-shots avoids the possibility that I'll leave a fic hanging because I get bored with it at some point. It's a curse.

3479423 absolutely all done! I'm a bit fuzzy though; Nightmare killed Celestia just as the elements were coming? Or was it after?

3480974

The gist of it is that Nightmare Moon ended up killing Celestia, instead of just incapacitating her, so when the Elements defeated her, Celestia didn't show up.

'Cause, y'know, she was dead.

I really did feel like crying.

That the story is marked "Complete" is sad, but also right.

I love you guys. Two great tastes that taste great together?

Ah, Starbutt and Moonbutt working together.

Nice enough story. Twilight's anger is certainly unsurprising.

Fantastic Story. Have they considered cracking open a certain statue in the Canterlot gardens? Or I suppose at this point, everyone still believes Discord has been petrified for eternity.

Too dark and tragic for me.

You two should just go balls out and craft an epic 100k story.

I mean, you guys work incredibly well, it seems.

~Skeeter The Lurker

Wow wow wow! That was so so amazing! A heartbreaking AU that just hits all the emotions! Simply put, I loved it!

3479639

So that's an idea. Twilight and Sunset stage a coup de ta and take over Equestria after slaying the Princesses and steal their powers.

3479420>>3479423

This was phenomenal, fantastic, I could feel Obselecence's presence during the drama and overall arc, but I could feel Eakin's charismatic flourishes in the characters themselves, both fantastic authors' writing styles were tangible, palpable and...

31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3919aMYxo1r9x0sdo1_400.gif

Hrrm... is the chaos enough for Discord to break free? He might help... That'd be an excellent sequel idea actually.

Hello Twilight, I'm cold and-
I've come to talk about your plans
And if you could get some tea steeping
We'll discuss why you aren't sleeping
And the actions that I committed whilst insane
Still remain
Begin the night... eternal

In restless dreams there sits my throne
Ruling ponies turned to stone
So to beg for a second chance
I meet her student with a regal stance
When my heart is stabbed by her bark with its vicious bite
I know she's right
To hate me for the night eternal

And in the dark moonlight I saw
Few dozen ponies, maybe more
Ponies grovelling without speaking
Ponies bowing with much fearing
Ponies waiting long for solutions to be shared
They're far too scared
To fare the night eternal

"Fool", said I, "You do not know
How I miss my sister so
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my hooves that I might reach you"
But my words, like poison pinpricks fell
And echoed
In the night eternal

And the people bowed and prayed
To the Lunar god they'd saved
And Twilight lashed out her warning
From the works that she was forming
And her words were, "You aren't even half of the princess that Celestia was"
Or ever could be"
And together they fixed the night eternal.

Great. Now my favourites box has two stories called Darkest Before Dawn, and they couldn't be more different. I wonder which will be more famous by the end of this one's tour of the featured box.

3482535 You know that would quickly turn into a BSDM clop fic right? :trollestia:


Nicely done

So in this Equestria, Celestia has always been around and was a goddess.

Because otherwise the Sun would never have existed before she did. :raritywink:

This also means Hearths Warming is out for this universe, since the historical events leading up to its inception partly depended on the unicorns' ability to raise the sun in the past.

Ah yes, and I wonder where Discord is... there is certain more than enough chaos and disharmony around...

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