Painted Mirror

by Lord of Turtles

Such a Nice Day

He knew that it was likely due to the species of the bird, or even the free-range nature of them, but a small, wicked part of Raj's mind decided that stolen eggs just taste better.

Those thoughts and many like them passed through his head, as well as numerous unrelated ones. The layout of his house, how long it'd been since he changed the gas in the lawnmower, the roster for the 2010 Panthers. Anything to keep his mind off of how high off the ground he was.

He reached for another branch, firmly grasping it before daring to go any higher. His boot slipped on a smooth limb and he let out an un-manly shriek before finding his footing again. Now still, he let out a shuddering breath and relaxed the muscles in his stomach. He took a look down and immediately regretted it. He was high up enough that Banjo, who was curled up at the base of the mammoth tree, was no larger than a quarter.

Raj clutched at the tree, breathing heavy and fighting waves of fear pounding through his veins. This was the third nest of the day and the fear had gotten no better. He muttered to himself “God I hate heights.”

It was a few minutes before he got going again. Despite his trepidation he was making progress. Just a few branches above him was the nest, settled in the Y of a limb.

He straddled the branch and scooted along it, using his hands to push himself. Every two or three slides he had to dry his palms, but he managed. Inside the nest was a clutch of six eggs, each one about the size of a tennis ball.

His mouth started to water and he he wiped a line of drool off his chin. There was enough there to keep him sustained for a few days. They would also keep, he wouldn't have to eat them quickly to avoid them going bad. If he used what he gathered intelligently he wouldn't have to forage again for another week.

Five of the eggs disappeared into his bag, one left in the nest to keep the giant birds that laid them in the area. He considered leaving more, hoping that the birds would lay more and he'd be able to come back, but the terrified adrenaline that was pumping through him advised against it.

He was all packed up and started to descend when he heard a noise, faint and clipped. At first he thought that it was the massive hawks that laid the eggs but then dismisses it when he realizes its his dog. He peered down, fighting off another wave of vertigo in the process, and saw that Banjo was up and barking at something he can't see.

“Banjo! Calm down! Bad dog!” he shouted at the canine, but he was too high up for him to hear. Even if he wasn't, Raj was fairly certain that Banjo would ignore him out of willfulness or idiocy.

He descended a few more branches and shouted one more time but failed to get the dog's attention. As he watched Banjo went sprinting off into the woods, quickly out of Raj's sight.

Raj started spewing vulgarities and climbed down with alarming speed. He could still faintly hear his dog barking his head off, which he took as a good sign.

He hit the ground, shrugging off his bag and snatched up his staff all at once. He spent a second righting himself and started after his dog's barks. The noises quickly got louder, indicating that he was drawing closer, and he could also make out the high pitched shriek of whatever he was chasing.

He was expecting to find Banjo with his face perched above a hole, barking at a terrified rodent. Or, more worryingly, some giant monster gnashing on his dog's hide. He wouldn't even be surprised to find nothing at all, just Banjo standing in a clearing, his quarry escaped from him or having never existed at all.

What he was most certainly not expecting was to see a tiny, white Unicorn herded onto a high rock.

Banjo had his front paws pressed against the side of the stone, barking at the distressed little horse while she frittered and nervously stamped her hooves, screaming and crying in distress.

Raj stood dumbfounded for just a second before looking at his dog and said “Banjo, down!” The dog ignored him, continuing to bark at his trapped quarry. Raj stalked forward and grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and hissed “Down.” Banjo shut his muzzle and obeys.

Banjo's silence did nothing to calm the scared filly, and she kept hollering her little head off. Raj was actually impressed by the pipes on her.

Raj let out a breath and smiles as warmly as he can. He said “Hey there.”, trying to sound genial. It had no effect, the little filly continuing to panic and fret. Raj shrugged and rapped his staff against the rock in an effort to get her attention.

“Huh? The little pony was shaken from her stupor and she looked around nervously, just then noticing the human standing at the base of her perch.

Raj put his smile back on and repeated “Hey there.”

She crouched, bringing her face low to the rock. “Oh, um, hi.” Her voice showed trepidation and her eyes never left the dog laying at Raj's heel.

“Are you okay sweetie? Did my dog scare you?” Raj knelt and put a hand on Banjo's neck, absently scratching it to keep the animal calm.

“No, I'm fine, he's just... really... um...”

“Big?” Raj offered. The little pony nodded and Raj chuckled lightly. “Yeah, he's a big 'un, but he's harmless, I promise. He just really likes the sound of his own voice.”

Her eyes narrowed. “So, he's not going to eat me?”

“No, I can assure you of that.”

“Good.” She hopped down gingerly and shook her mane and tail to dislodge the bits of forest that littered them. “I was starting to wonder how I was going to live the rest of my life on a stupid rock.” Her voice cracked on the last syllable and she giggled.

One thing that Raj knew was that ponies are not large creatures. Zecora's the largest one he'd seen and she only just came up to his chest. This one doesn't even reach his mid-thigh, smaller and maybe half the weight of his dog. She was small enough to fit in a backpack, he mused, and the mental image of such made him laugh.

She tilted her head and looked at him quizzically “Did I say something funny?”

Raj put a hand to his forehead and chuckled helplessly. “No sweetie, just thought of something funny. Don't worry about it.”

Her eyebrow cocked “And another thing, how do you know my name?”

“What?”

“You keep calling me by my name, but I don't remember telling it to you.” her eyes narrowed into something like an accusatory glare.

That line of inquiry was cut short when they both here a raspy, girlish voice echo out of the woods “SWEETIE BELLE!”

The aforementioned filly stepped forward and shouted back “Scootaloo, Applebloom! Over here!”

A moment later a swatch of purple mane poked out of a patch of undergrowth followed by a rusty-orange filly with tiny wings. That one was quickly followed by an equally sized yellow pony wearing saddlebags with a brilliant crimson mane and tail and a comically large bow pinned to the back of her head.

They started to trot over and the orange one rasped “Oh, wow, you found him!”

“Yeah, well kinda. His dog chased me onto this rock and he followed him.” she gestured a hoof back to Banjo, who was still obediently laying at his master's heel. “That still counts, right?”

“It sure does!” Says the yellow one in a deeply southern accent, specifically Georgian if Raj didn't miss his guess. “Now we could take him back to Twilight and earn our Cutie Marks!”

“Cutie Mark Crusader Cryptozoologists! Yay!” All three of them yelled in unison, making Raj wince at the sudden noise.

Applebloom nosed around in her bag for a second and pulled out a short length of rope. She drawled “Well, let's get going.” She reared up and spun the lasso a few times before snapping it forward, looping it on Raj's wrist. She pulled at him, grinding her tiny hooves in the dirt and grunting out “C'mon, c'mon!”

Raj didn't know whether to be amused or annoyed by this, but settled on amused when the rope slips out of her mouth and she plops into the dirt. He laughed and uncoiled the length from his arm “Okay, what's all this about? Who are you three?”

“Oooo, neat! It can talk! Oh, I'm Scootaloo.” Said the orange one proudly, her tiny wings fluttering a bit.

“Applebloom.” muttered the yellow one while she coiled up the rope once again, already considering trying to lasso Raj again.

“And I'm Sweetie Belle!” spoke the white unicorn, her voice cracking joyfully on her own name. “And together we are...”

The three of them leaped together and each stabbed a hoof skyward, crying in unison “The Cutie Mark Crusaders!”

“We're on a quest to find our special talents!” said Scootaloo.

“And earn our Cutie Marks!” added Sweetie Belle.

The whole display was almost too much for Raj. He managed to chuckle out “I'm sorry what?”

Apple Bloom sighed like he was missing something painfully obvious. “We're tryin' to find out what our special talents are, what we're supposed to be really, really good at.”

“Duh.” Scootaloo added unhelpfully.

“And what does that have to do with me?” Asked Raj, still entertained by the precocious girls.

Sweetie Belle stepped in “Yesterday, we were in the library trying to find out how we could try fire-eating when we heard Twilight talking about some undiscovered creature living in the Everfree Forest she saw last week.”

“Yeah, she seemed real excited 'bout it, kept talking about 'common ancestry' and 'chromozooms'-”

“Chromosomes.”

“Whatever, and was complainin' bout wanting to see it again. So we figgered that if we could find it and bring it back to Ponyville, we'd have helped Twilight discover a new critter.”

“And maybe we'll finally earn our Cutie Marks!”

All three fillies stared up at him, hope sparkling in their large eyes. Raj cocked an eyebrow at the three of them. “Uh huh, do your parents know you three are out here by yourselves?”

The evasive looks and sunken posture the fillies dropped into was all the answer Raj needed. “Thought so. Run along home little ponies.” He turned about and started walking away, clapping his hand against his thigh to summon Banjo with him.

He made it less than five steps before Scootaloo zipped in front of him, a playful grin on her face. “Not so fast big guy, alright, get him girls!”

All three Crusaders let out high pitched cries and dove at him. Scootaloo wrapped her forelegs around his knee and pulled only knocking herself off-balance in the process. Applebloom once again shot her lasso, wrapping it around his arm again and starting pulling with all of her little might. Sweetie Belle somehow got herself up his back and tangled around his neck, trying to pull him into submission.

“C'mon, we got him now!” Said Applebloom, her voice muffled by the rope in her teeth. The three renewed their assault, pulling and twisting with no discernible direction.

“Is... was this really happening?” asked Raj, once again caught between amusement and annoyance at the antics of the little fillies. “This is actually happening, I'm being attacked by children.”

Banjo barked and hopped about, mistaking the attack on his master for play. Scootaloo shouted “Augh, his dog's helping him! Sweetie Belle, now!”

Sweetie Belle shifted herself and wrapped an elbow around his head, covering up his eyes. She squeaked “He can't see, finish him!”

“I'm on it!” Scootaloo shouted and bit his leg, hard.

That one hurt. He shook his leg, flinging Scootaloo away onto her back where Banjo proceeded to furiously lick her face. Raj grabbed the rope and pulled, bringing Applebloom close and lifted Sweetie Belle off his back, holding both the fillies aloft at face height, he bluntly said “That is enough.” He lowered them to the ground and pointed his staff in the general direction of Ponyville. “Go home.”

Sweetie Belle scrambled to her hooves, “But, our Cutie Marks-”

“I don't care.” He sneers “I am out of patience. It is already late and your parents are probably worried about you. Go home. Now.”

“You can't tell us what to do!” Defiantly shouted Applebloom while she stomped a hoof.

Raj loomed over the little pony “I crap bigger than you girl, I most certainly can tell you what to do. Banjo!” He tersely shouted for his dog, beckoning it away from Scootaloo. The orange filly stood up, her face streaked with dog slobber. She numbly walked over to her companions, staring up at Raj. “Now you three are going to leave right now and never come back here, is that understood?”

Applebloom clearly wanted to say more, but was forced back by her two friends. Sweetie Belle was the first to speak “Okay mister, we'll go home. Sorry to bother you.”

Raj relaxed, letting the etched look on his face fade. “Its fine girls, no harm done.” A beat passed “Well?”

“Oh! Um...”

He tilted his head. “Go on. Get.”

Scootaloo had something more to say at that but was once again pulled away by her two companions. The three trotted in the direction of the town and Raj lost them over a small hill.

He waited a minute more to make certain the three were gone before starting to trudge back to his camp, hoping his bag was still where he left it. He muttered “Damn kids, running around in monster filled woods alone. Who does that?”

Banjo arfed lightly.

“Well, besides me.”

* * *

Getting back to his camp took the better part of the day, leaving only a little over an hour of daylight left to finish what was left of his chores. He gathered water, stowed food, and checked the Arch. With those tasks done he slapped a pair of cleaned, headless fish on a flat rock in the fire to fry.

Raj lowered himself onto a sunken log, hissing at a sudden pain from his leg. He pulls up his pant-leg to see a curve of square bruises where Stootaloo bit him. He frowned and cursed, layering a bit of Zecora's ointment on them to head off any infection. He made a note to check it again in the morning.

His thoughts drifted to the little fillies. He wasn't mad at them, just annoyed, and maybe a little exasperated at their childishness. They live near these woods, they had to know how dangerous they are, he reasoned. He needed to be harsh with them. In fact, he probably shouldn't have humored their little assault as long as he did.

Maybe he should have just gone with them. The way they talked these Cutie Mark things are important, and somehow his presence could help earn them. At the absolute least he could have walked them out of the Everfree, made sure they didn't get jumped by something.

“What do you think Banjo?” The dog lifted his head up “You think we should have walked them back to town?”

The dog looked at him with something approaching curiosity for a second before going back to trying to move the popping and hissing fish with his thoughts.

“Bah, you're no help.” Banjo ignored the insult and continued to be a dog.

Just as the skin on the fish was starting to crisp and brown both Raj and Banjo perked up at a noise from out in the woods. Both were on their feet in a second, Raj with was staff and Banjo slinking back. Raj had long since learned that anything nocturnal in the Everfree was always dangerous.

He revised that lesson a moment later when an off-orange filly stepped into the flickering firelight, a wide grin on her face. “Hiya mister!”

Raj's eyebrow shot halfway up his forehead “What?”

Scootaloo called back over her shoulder “See, I told you this was his fire.” the other two ponies followed after her, showing similar smiles.

“Hey, you were right. Oh, hi Banjo.” Squeaked Sweetie Belle. The animal in question trotted forward and sniffs her face before giving it a friendly lick.

“Why are you three here? Did you get lost?”

“Nope, we followed ya!” answered Applebloom, pointing a proud hoof at Raj.

“You three followed me? Through the Everfree?” said Raj, his tone showing utter disbelief.

“Yep, it was Scootaloo's idea.”

“Totes!” boasted the little Pegasus.

“She figgered that if we couldn't getcha back home, we'd just have to learn what we could by watchin' ya in your natural... uh, natural-”

“Its environment.” offered Sweetie Belle.

“Ah was gettin` to it!” She shot back at her friend. “We'd have to learn what we could by watchin` ya in your natural environment, like real Crypto-majiggers. Oh, was that enough, is it there yet?”

At that the most curious thing yet happens. Both of Applebloom's friends dart forward and intently examined her butt, hmming and squinting at it. Sweetie Belle even went around to inspect the other side.

A thousand and one crass jokes came to Raj's mind, but he held them back.

“Nothing.” rasped Scootaloo.

“Dangit. Well... no big deal, we just have to do more.”

“What? No nonono.” Raj shook his head “This had been more than enough, I'm taking you three home right now.”

“Awwww.” All three groaned in unison.

“Don't 'awww' me, this is what I should have done before. I'm going to take each of you home and personally tell each of your parents what naught little girls you've all been!”

“But-”

“No buts, now move!” He pointed his staff...

...into the close darkness of the Everfree Forest.

His face fell. He's not sure how but he managed to forget that it was pitch dark, not even a bit of light filtering through the canopy of giant trees surrounding them. It would be a journey of hours just to get to the edge of the forest from his camp, much more in the dark. The idea of moving three boisterous little girls through the Everfree at night was not something that would be safe for anyone involved.

He sighed “Scratch that. We'll leave first thing in the morning.”

“Cutie Mark Crusader Critter Sleepover!” all three once again shouted in unison.

“Oh my god!” Raj recoiled, clutching his ear and cringing. “Do you three rehearse those or-”

“Oooh, what's this?” asked Applebloom as she taps a hoof against the side of Raj's broken car.

“I think it's his house.” answered Scootaloo as she pressed her hooves into one of the deflated tires. “But how did he make it?”

“Oo ooh! I know!” Sweetie Belle lifted a leg and waved it around, like she's eagerly waiting to be called on in class. “Maybe he's like a bee.”

“He's not like a bee silly, he doesn't have any wings.” Scootaloo paused “At least, I don't think he had any...” She turned to Raj, eyeing him up.

“No no no, I don't mean he's like a bee, maybe he built it the way bees make their hives.”

“What, with tiny hammers n' stuff?”

“What? No, with spit.”

“What? You can't make stuff out of spit.” Scootaloo declared “Believe me, I've tried.”

“No, you can. The bees, like, chew on wood and stuff and mix with their spit” She mimed hawking something into her hooves. “and then they mold it into stuff.” She works her hooves around like she was molding clay and then grinned at her friends.

Applebloom and Scootaloo looked at her incredulously, shared a glance with each other, and then looked back at Sweetie Belle. “Nope, not buying it.”

“It's true!” cries Sweetie Belle, her voice cracking on the last word. “Ms. Cheerilee told me when we went on that field-trip to Whitetail Woods!”

The girls continued to bicker back and forth like that, their childish voices piercing the serenity of the woods. Raj ignored them, settling back near the fire and dragging his makeshift frying pan out of the pit.

He scraped Banjo's share off and tossed it in his bowl. The dog immediately lost interest in the little fillies now that food was available and he scrambled over to it, eating the offering with the kind of exuberance only a hungry puppy could muster. Raj smiled at the display and ate his own meal at a more sedate pace.

He was halfway through his meal when he realized that he had an audience. The girls had migrated closer to the fire and seemed to be doing their best to not watch him to eat, but were failing miserably. Applebloom even edged closer to inspect his plate, taking a few sniffs that set her stomach to rumbling

After a few more intensely observed bites he asked “You three hungry?”

Applebloom rubbed a foreleg. “Well-”

“Oh sweet Celestia yes!” interrupted Scootaloo as she hopped to her hooves.

He huffed slightly. “Wait here.” He fetched his cooler from where it was nestled in a tree and popped the lid, showing a bounty of harvested berries he'd gathered the other day. “Go ahead, eat up.”

“Blackberries, thanks Mister!” chirped Scootaloo before scooping out a hoof-ful of the sweet fruit and messily devouring it. The other two descended on the bounty shortly.

Raj looked on at the little ponies with wan amusement. He knew how long it took him to find all those berries and how far he had to go to get them. Sharing would knock an entire day off his rationing schedule.

Scootaloo trotted over to him, muzzle and cheeks sticky with juice and jaw still busy chewing. She swallowed loudly and asked “Um, do you have any water Mister?” She grinned, eyes sparkling and little seeds stuck to her teeth.

He smiled. One day was worth this, he decided.

“Sure thing little one.” He fetched a trio of bottles from his trunk and offered them to the girls who greedily gulped them down.

A little while later the cooler sat on its side, empty. The three little fillies are sprawled out near the fire, half comatose from stuffing themselves like they would never see food again.

“I think we overdid it.” groaned Sweetie Belle as she stretched out, resting a hoof on her slightly distended belly.

“Nah. Well, maybe a little.” Applebloom then belched with surprising verve, startling everyone present. She blushed “Eh heh, um, pardon.”

“Good one kid.” Raj chuckles and tossed another log on the fire, sending a wave of sparks twisting into the air. “You three good?” He got a trio of nods. “Alright, be right back.” He rose to his feet and walked a little deeper into the woods.

He picked his way to the only thing visible in the shrouded woods, the Arch.

He ran his hands along it again, feeling the warmth of the bark and its odd smoothness. He held it, seeing if the light had changed or the glow had intensified. He probed for any difference, any alteration to the it. There was none.

“What's that thing?” asks Applebloom from a few feet behind him.

He shouldn't be surprised that one of them followed him, but part of him still was. “The Arch, or at least that's what I call it.”

She steps closer and tentatively touches it. “Oooh, it's warm.”

“Yeah.”

“And pretty lookin`.”

“That too.”

“What's it do?”

He took a moment to ponder that one. “It either does nothing, or it could send me home.”

Applebloom looked quizzical “Seriously?”

Raj shrugged. Applebloom scanned around for a moment, got bored, and wandered back over to her friends. Raj took another few minutes checking over every inch of the Arch. Finding nothing new, he trudged back over to the fire.

He was on the edge of the firelight when he heard something other than the crackle of the fire or the girl's speech. A light brush or maybe a shift in the wind. His eyes flicked to the side and he's certain he saw the edge of something slither by in the darkness.

Raj managed his gait, keeping his strides even like he didn't see anything. He didn't want to alert whatever was out there or the girls. The only sign of wariness he gave was when he picked up his staff.

“Girls?” He said as he walked over to the fire “Go get in the car.”

“What's a car?

“That thing.” He gestured to the wrecked vehicle.

“Oh, you mean your beehive.” squeaked Sweetie Belle.

“Silly, he's not a bee.”

“So, would it just be a hive then?”

Raj grimaced “Yes, whatever, get in the hive.” The girls stood up and started to move.

The only warning he got was the collective rush of air from all three girls inhaling at once. He took that as the warning that it was and dropped into a low crouch.

He felt something pass over him, close enough for the hairs of its chest to graze along his back.

The thing flew far, sailing over the fillies arrayed in front of him, landed with a quiet thud and kept moving. Raj only caught the end of a reptilian tail before it retreated beyond the edge of the firelight. Banjo was up and making up for his inattention by filling the night with his mad barking.

Scootaloo shouted “What was that thing?!”

“I don't know! It was so big!” was Sweetie Belle's frightened reply.

Raj cut off their panic and commanded “Hive. Now.”

The girls sprinted to the metal structure, Raj scanning the area for the... whatever it was that tried to take his head off. Banjo followed as well, knowing the tone of voice his master uses for commands.

Raj threw open the door and practically tossed the little ponies into it. He slammed it shut and leaned in through the busted window. “Do not leave this thing for any reason. Understand?” All three nodded to him, fear burning in their eyes. “Good. Don't worry girls, I'll take care of this.” That seemed to reassure them somewhat and he walked away from the car.

His guard was up and he kept his stance light, ready to switch facing in a moment. The thing caught him unaware once, but he knew that it can't do that again. He just needed to keep on his toes and he could drop this thing. He beat down a Bugbear and challenged a Chimera, he could handle this thing.

A guttural growl sounded from across the campsite and his head snapped on it. The thing slunk into the firelight, eyes practically glowing while it stared directly at him and licked its chops.

Raj had no idea what this thing was. It was roughly his size, but horizontal and lean. Its head and chest looked feline, covered in shaggy blue fur, but its legs and tail were coated in smooth, overlapping purple scales. A ridge of spikes ran along its spine and down its lithely flicking tail. It stalked around the fire with easy grace, staring intently.

“Oh, I know what it is!” cried Applebloom.

“Applebloom, shutup!” hushed Scootaloo.

“But I've seen one of these things before, its a, uh, Chupa... Chupa...”

“Chupacrabra?” offered Sweetie Belle.

“Yeah, that's it! Chupa-thingy, hey mister, that's a Chupa-whatever-Sweetie-said!”

“Thank you Applebloom. Stay in the car.” he tonelessly replied, never taking his eyes off the creature.

It continued to circle, appraising Raj. He didn't circle with it, unwilling to let it get between him and the fillies. He kept his staff out, knowing that he'd need to use his greater reach when it lunges.

But it didn't lunge, it just kept moving, circling, keeping his face one way. Distracted.

He turned his neck to aim his ear backwards and was barely able to hear a scrape on the forest floor. He slid the grip on his staff and pushed it back, using the way the thing jumped earlier as a gauge. His aim was on the mark and the tip of his staff caught it in the chest, right above the transition from fur to scales. The Chupacabra tumbled through the air past him, hissing and spitting. It hit the ground ungainly but managed to get its feet beneath itself before it stopped rolling.

It slid to a stop beside its ally and coughed, the wind likely knocked out of it. Side by side, Raj saw that they looked almost identical aside from the ridge of spikes on the one he struck showing as a deep black instead of purple.

Scootaloo gasped “There's two of those things?”

“Yeah.” he muttered as the pair slunk back into the woods, melting into the darkness. “And today was such a nice day too.”

Comments

[light snow]

Never liked the cmc...

[Blackshadow of Abys]

I should have saw that coming first I as going to write Raj is like the chupacabra and jersey devil and what happens MC Chupi attacks with a friend

[Alondro]

He picked his way to the only thing visible in the shrouded woods, the Arch.

Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock arrive to investigate the mysterious Arch...

Mr. Spock notes that ponies are highly illogical creatures and Kirk starts hitting on all the mares.

openlettersmonthly.com/stevereads/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Forever.jpg

[StrawberryGamer]

“Yeah, that's it! Chupa-thingy, hey mister, that's a Chupa-whatever-Sweetie-said!”

I dunno, kinda looks like a big cat to me.

[Lancerlot]

The smelly stuff on the trees isn't helping all that much...

[Dolomite]

8074358
What, like a puma?

[DuskKoopa]

8906849
Quit making up animals!

[Teraunce]

7312218
Roflmao