• Member Since 6th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen Jan 1st, 2018

The Equestrian Gentlecolt


E

A science fiction story about how a fantasy world came to be. An alicorn foal awakens alone in a world that sentient life has long since left behind. This story follows Luna through her foalhood in the strange world, her quest for knowledge about who and what she is, and what happens when she finally finds her answers and makes the trip to the beautiful new world that her sister now rules.

Cover image: Luna in the Sky with Diamonds by Noctudelic

Author's note: This was my first story, and even though it's complete now, feedback is still very much appreciated. My biggest goal here is to continuously improve, so every two cents helps.

Chapters (16)
Comments ( 86 )

Chapter 1: in which there is a speak-and-spell.
Watching this for now - keep it up!

sweet jesus. a human. And do I detect the slightest undercurrent of post-apocolyptica? Me Gusta. This would be the kind of fanfic I would write if I was not already writing. Just beautiful. +1 fave. :twilightsmile:

12283
Just so. :pinkiehappy:

12584
You do indeed! And I'm glad you're enjoying it so far.

Oh. My. Celestia.

Another story added to my already-impossibly long list of "have to read this one" stories.

Very nicely done; it's an incredible world that you're building here, and I can't get enough of it.

excellent story can't wait to hear more. genuinely.

so...
How bout we get a number 6.
and if you could come in and do it on saturday? that'd be greeeeat.

13997

With pleasure. A fantastic, fantastic story. Well done.

This is definantly one of my faves! I was a bit disappointed that the current addition wat a bunch of emails however it added the anticipation of the next chapter quite nicely. Can't wait!:rainbowkiss:

15063
Don't worry, I'll only be publishing the "bonus exposition" bits along with chapters. So you'll get at least 1000 words of narrative with each update. :twilightsmile:

12283

Seems a lot more complex than a simple "Speak 'n Spell"... Maybe one... *seemingly spooky voice that actually sounds rediculous* from the fuuuutuuure...! :derpytongue2:

What the...? Where'd the "Next Chapter" button go?

...Huh? What do you mean it's not there!?!

What? You're telling me you haven't written the next few chapters yet?

*Spike* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:raritycry::raritydespair::fluttercry::applecry::fluttershbad::fluttershyouch::pinkiesad2::fluttershysad:

this better not be one of those fics that just dropped off of the radar after the nightmare night episode.

happens, don't be so evil about asking for more and you might get it though. (just how we work, when someone is mean you don't want to continue what there mean about, usually.)

18337
It's not dead, just sleeping. I've been sick, and the Minecraft mod I'm on the team for (IndustrialCraft2) is taking up more of my time. You might have to wait an arbitrary amount of time between chapters, since I tend to work at my own (rather intermittent) pace, but Luna's story (and LUNA's story!) isn't over yet.

Ah, Nightmare Night... apparently Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe being the national language 1000 years ago is now canon. I could just ignore it I suppose, but I'll probably end up spinning it one way or another to get it to fit into my story. I do enjoy a challenge.

20099 Well played, sir... Well played.

Yay! I am so exited that this updated! Have a pinkie pie.:pinkiesmile:

Curse these short chapters;
They drive me to insomnia

Another exelent addition! I await your next chapter good sir!:moustache:

Wow... as the Moon in the anchor of the day and the seasons, so Luna is the anchor for Celestia. No other way to describe their relationship.

DO NOT INCITE THE SOLAR WRATH OF YOUR GODDESS


...poor Celly...

Wow. That was a great chapter :twilightsmile:, I look forward to chapter 14 nicely done :raritywink:

so is this coming to a close?
it seems like it...

And i can alleady tell luna meeting Celestia will be an incrediblly "D'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW" moment

Oh... Oh my. Pardon me as I pick my jaw up off of the floor. This story is amazingly amazing. Mind-blowingly awesome.

I just- Hoover Dam, you weave a masterful tale. Please, keep this up!

Hmm...this doesn't make the Thomas guy seem too bright. "Let's see: vital instructions for granting our tragically abandoned goddess-daughter one hope of rejoining her sister and all the others who were forced to leave without her...I think I'll write it on a single delicate piece of paper!" Really, guy, you couldn't put such a critical message onto one/all of the computers, or at least write it onto something that wouldn't be so likely to get chewed up by rats? Ah well, she still found it anyway, so at least it worked out okay. And I suppose it's also possible she could have figured out how to activate the gateway thing even without those directions.

So is Luna going to bring the rats with her? They don't want to get left behind either! And everyone knows you have to bring along a nice propagation group of rats when you settle a new environment.

Anyway! Looking forward to the conclusion.

93793

It is indeed coming to a close, and I hope that their meeting will be as d'aww as it is in my head. I've been looking forward to that part for a while now!

93877

It does seem like he was holding the idiot ball for a moment there, doesn't it? :derpyderp2: There would have been plenty of other perfectly interesting ways for me to deliver the message, without appealing to a miracle to save a scrap of paper from the claws of nesting rats. I think, if I did it all over again, I would probably change that. But I'd already written the note's presence into the story all the way back in the prologue, and I didn't want to just throw it away. So I'll chalk it up to him being just that short on time due to the whole team being busy with disaster response and an impromptu two-year acceleration of their plans to leave. That, or he had an absent-minded genius moment. (I do tech support sometimes. I've seen firsthand some of the stupidest mistakes from some of the smartest people. It's plausible!)

And no rats, sorry. Luna doesn't like the rats.

And there's the next chapter! It might be the final one - I'm not sure yet if there will be another numbered chapter, or if Luna's introduction to Equestrian society will be part of the epilogue, I'm going to have to play that one by ear. (I also want to write an epilogue in present-day Equestria. Are you allowed to have two epilogues? :applejackunsure:)

Now I can't help but wonder what happens to all the humans after this. Maybe that will be the subsequent-post-epilogue?

94055

They die! :trollestia:

...of old age. After living long, fulfilling lives. :twilightsheepish: Last chapter incoming tonight, I think, and it'll be touching on this. It's bittersweet, but that's sort of the way of stories about immortals.

Huh, interesting way to handle the disappearance of humans. Everyone turns into ponies! Well, collectively anyway. Anyway, you managed to tie everything together pretty well with this story. I like it. Even gives a good explanation for all the leftovers from human society sprinkled amongst the modern ponies. Kinda sad to imagine Earth dying behind them, though.

So are the dragons and other various creatures already around, created along with the world itself, or do they come later? Wondering if Equestria's monsters existed while humans were still alive makes me imagine the possibility of a sequel story about a human petrified by a cockatrice, lost in the wilderness for thousands of years, then randomly discovered and unfrozen one day to see how the world has changed.

Read from the begining to the end. This was awesome.

As fan of the princesses, I think this is one of their best origin stories, very well thought. And Equestria rounded up nicely. The pun names, the different ponies, the human references, all explained. Bravo. :twilightsmile:

Just one thing... poor rats. :fluttercry:

And we're done here. I might add some extras on the end or something if inspiration randomly strikes, but the story is officially over. It was quite a ride, though a slower one than I had hoped. Thanks to everyone who read/reads it!

Insanely original, well-written, and, well, it's just fucking great. I don't have a lot of words, just five stars.

you know, the tool parts aside, celestia's outburst at the end would serve as a pretty good description of my own opinion of the human race as a whole (wouldn't really bother me none if our species just up and vanished one day honestly). that pretty much sums up various reasons i dislike humans... partly unrelated but for a while now all i've really thought our future to be is self-destruction and the more bad news/events that come up the more likely that seems :fluttershysad:

I agree wholeheartedly with the above sentiments. I honestly did not see this going where it did and was pleasantly surprised that it didn't. 5 stars from me as well, good sir, for an engaging story that has kept me up far past my bedtime.

You know you've been wikiwalking too often when you keep going to click on the above links...

That was incredibly, insanely awesome. :pinkiehappy:

Wow, not much else I can say about this excellent piece of writing except wow. :heart:

Simply excellent, I love this backstory for the Princesses.

Hmm... "Megan"... can't be a coincidence, surely?

Nice story.

350253

I threw just a few little references in there for the particularly sharp-eyed. I did indeed name her after G1's resident human heroine. Good catch. :twilightsmile:

350880 References like that are great fun to put in. In Ponies in Space, for example, I mention how Firefly "Reminds (Twilight) of Rainbow Dash". Hardly a coincidence there... Similarly, Dash mentions that the cameras all fail whenever she does one of her tricks (it's the one that's always slightly offscreen and involves an explosion).
But then, the show itself does those too. Notice that Dash's crash that out her in the hospital was an attempt at a double inside-out loop?
..well, neither did I until TVTropes pointed it out. Yet another G1-G4 link.
The king of those references, though, is probably Alexwarlorn on DA. His series has managed to make ALL the generations of the series equally valid - Pinkie's somewhat nostalgic for her white coat and wings, to give just one of hundreds of examples...

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