The Conversion Bureau genre was created on March 23rd, 2011. I chose to celebrate the anniversary of the humble origins of one of the most potent and unique of all MLP:FIM subgenres of fanfiction through the invention of completely original, shockingly new visions of the central concept.
Visit a universe where Luna and Celestia are mountain-sized supercomputers. A universe where the Singularity is defined by a toy in a dead man's hands. A universe where Mankind has spread to the stars and the latest fashion is designer bodies. See the Conversion Bureau in new guises, through fresh eyes, as never before.
Chapters (11)
Ah, you finally posted it!
These new universes... So pretty
Vision of a man about uploading humanity's mind to a new shell
The ideas of greater expansion of worlds, with a simple pocket universe named Equestria
A single virus to overturn the entire history of violence.
The great rebuild on a shattered civilization, consumed by their of arrogance
And this, a simple curtains, bridging the gap between two worlds so easily passable
Words cannot describe the awesomeness
It is written by the inimmitable Chatoyance, therefore I shall track it.
This whole thing really stings my brain.
Isn't it nice to read about horrible dystopias to feel better about our own world?
To be so lucky as to get not one but five new stories, HUZZAH!
Nice! I love it! Keep it up Chatoyance!
I am so impressed! What an amazing set of stories, and as usual so beautifully written. When I grow up (as a writer) I wanna be just like you!
Dafaddah
Hehe. This is cool!
This is getting a little.... strange.
Confusing, but cool concept!
Well, this is an interesting take on The Singularity.
Wow, this is a great idea. Celestia and Luna being supercomputers, controlling real-world avatars, and being gods because nanobots? Awesome.
Makes you think. Any one of these stories could be possible at some point in the future.
313133
That would be totally awesome!
But not the Phoenix In Hooves, that one required us to be dead first
313238 Meh.
"Zero point nine eight percent probability of an exact match..."
Less than one percent is pretty poor match. I'm guessing it was intended to be "Zero point nine eight probability..."
313329
oops. I'll just go fix that.
The beginning of this chapter, and the attitude of the two characters, reminds me so much of the decadent elites in S. P. Somtow's great old "Mallworld" stories.
HOLY FUCK THIS FIC IS AWESOME
!
ee kayt mak shoo boyt mey
this chapter weirded me out
313133
Ch.3, The Friendship Virus, is IMO the most unrealistic. If Singularity-level technology is achieved, whether in the next hundred years or the next thousand, the various technologies seen in The Pony Singularity, The Most Decadent Thing, and Phoenix in Hooves might all become mere theoretically solvable engineering problems instead of Science Fiction. Curtains of Light is the simple intersection of two universes. But for Ch.3, the truth of the matter is that, for better or worse, genetic manipulation can only go so far. Human culture, that is, the world that has been created by the uncounted generations of the past, is at the least as much to blame for the Human Condition as Humanity's Human-ness is. Basically, gender roles are culturally defined. There's lots of stuff about it, but it's late for me and I don't remember anything accurate about anthropology at all right now. I do remember reading something about the Man=Hunter, Woman=Gatherer view being extraordinarily stupid and narrow-minded and wrong and stuff. Oh, and uh, something something nothing stopping it from being reversed and blah blah chaos and moonbases and disease spreading models and that kind of stuff.
That's not to say that I didn't enjoy reading Ch.3, because it was hilarious! The breasts were totally intentional! It's an Ultimate Feminist Victory: World Peace and stay-at-home breast-feeding Dads.
I certainly do agree with the sentiment: World Culture definitely needed an injection of femininity yesterday, where yesterday is quite a long time ago.
This is one of my favorite things about you, Chat: Your ability to conceive of all of these incredible sci-fi scenarios and then bring them home with excellent writing and compassionate detail. So. Much. AWESOME.
I am extremely disappointed in you Chatoyance: None of these stories are new!
I may not have quite read as much Science Fiction as you have, but I can tell that all you've done is taken great inspiration from those stories, integrated FiM and TCB themes in clever and entertaining ways, and Jaywalking! 
How could you, you monster! 
Seriously though, I would like to know what inspired these shorts. I know that I've read at least two very similar but different versions of the computer-becomes-god story, (I can't remember the name of the stories or the authors,) but if any of the others have been directly inspired by something I can't tell.
I'm kinda a bad scifi fan. Not to say that I haven't read stuff online or at libraries, but the only classic sci-fi book I own is a 400-page short-story collection from Philip K. Dick. That's only ONE book. From what you've said before, Chatoyance, it's clear that you've read much more than I have. For the last six months 90% of my fiction intake has been FiM fanfics. I'm so horrible!
I'm definitely leaking mental ability right now.
To the bed-cave! 
314304
I don't know where inspiration comes from. I just sat down because I needed to write and these spilled out over about two days. I was feeling bored with Going Pony (don't worry, I haven't abandoned it) and I really needed to write something really different. So I just went with that. It felt so good.
The image of old Gunter in the chair with Pinkie Pie in his hands just popped into my mind, whole. That image implied the whole story to me.
The Friendship Virus was actually the first story I wrote, that came, I think, from me chatting on IRC. I was arguing that going pony was a good thing, but some people actually told me that the reason they were against ponification was because it would end all the wars, and wars were cool and without them life would be boring. I choked and gagged inside, because I don't think they were joking. Seriously.
I'm a trannie. I've seen what testosterone does. I have a unique perspective. It really does cause all of those serious personality changes, whether or not people want to admit it. Humans are controlled by their chemistry, and our free will is tempered, strongly, by our bodies. We only have partial free will. I have personally seen this to be true. Thus my Friendship Virus story. It's not some feminist political crap. I tell you true: I have lived it, and I report that it is fact.
Also, I had just finished reading New Scientist about why Bonobo apes are so helpful to each other and so kind and gentle, unlike all other great apes. They are strictly matriarchal, and the female leaders simply will not abandon others or take any violent crap at all. They are the only great apes that live this way. And they are the only non-violent apes.
Instant story.
The Most Decadent thing was inspired, I think, by imagining humanity at its peak in the future, then slamming AbFab into it. The old Britcom 'Absolutely Fabulous'? That's my best guess.
Curtains Of Light came about, I think, by two things. One, I wanted a door to Equestria that was not a bubble. Second, I was still thinking about those people who oppose ponification on the grounds that suffering and war and cruelty are good things and that Man needs them somehow, and that losing them would be a wrong... somehow. Then I thought of El Salvador. I knew a guy from there. His entire family had been skinned alive by the enforcers, which is why he had run to America. Yea, ponification is such a bad thing. Oh, yeah.
Phoenix In Hooves was inspired by those really sharp, tall, Super Mario style mountains in the background of MLP? You know, the impossibly tall mountains in the cartoon? I thought, what if they were supermachines? What if Equestria was the future of the earth - a common and obvious speculation used by many authors. I started putting those together and came up with a gray goo scenario that fit.
Hey! I guess I CAN kinda explain where inspiration comes from after all.
Cool.
wow this was... amazing, brilliant, perfect, phenomenal, and epic
just the whole thing, its genius
i can almost visibly see the story's happening before my eyes
all of these chapters are... amazing
you did an amazing job building the characters in such a short pieces
i wish i had even a 16th the talent that you have
please keep being a genius, you are one of three or four other writers that have encouraged me to take my own project into my own hands instead of hoping someone else writes it
"She had to breath."
Guess what?
I wonder is Sylvia would be partial to calculating the exact value of pi...
Also, excellent fic. It's a nice break from the traditional crapsack CB world.
As I read each tale, more and more and more thoughts began pouring into my consciousness, like a great damn breaking and the water it holds back thundering down to fill an empty lake.
At first, it was mainly pure curiosity that fueled the flow.
Then, the water moved with understanding, of recognition.
Followed by amusement (not the mocking kind).
And next with utter imagination and wonder.
But finally, the last trickles came from the broken dam with the force of shame, and regret.
This entire work interested me in the way that a young child would stare at a dead thing: morbid fascination. So ugly, so beautiful, so weirdly off-putting, but packed with a powerful dosage of revelation.
And I have to say, it scared the fuck out of me.
You address a lot of things in the real world here, intentional or not. For instance, the hyper-connectivity seen in the second story. One may merely go to a park, a place of great natural beauty, and see people on laptops or tablets or smartphones, completely ignoring the amazing world around them, instead opting to create one to live in.
No, that's hypocritical of me. I'm an author, for fucks sake, and a brony at that. Immersing myself in a different world is what I do. And not all the real world is worth giving more than a second glance at.
The chapter about the virus, though, struck a chord with me. As a hot-blooded, hairy, beer-swigging, knuckle-cracking, rugby-playing, hunting, unnecessary-risk-taking, lazy, belching, strong-but-silent man... I completely agree with you. Women should really be running everything, and they'd probably be doing it a hell of a lot better than men every did. Maybe when humans were still rugged, still living free and wild, men were the best choice. But not now. Now, manly qualities are a bit unnecessary. However, I must digress. Contact sports (rugby) are very fun for me, and I really do love the simple, unexplainable sensation of ramming something at full speed.
Go figure.
Anyway, have an obligatory "MOAR!" and pat yourself on the back. Good fucking job, indeed.
I'm going to go lay down and stare at the ceiling now. Toodles!
312081
No kidding. It's like its saying that men are completely incapable of kindness while women are unable to be cruel with the only solution being men becoming man-ladies. Its like that crappy made for TV movie that was on syfy before it was syfy.
So I take it Luna is in Tycho Crater and has dimensions in the precise ratio of 1:4:9?
Amazing story, but I think you messed up the subject-verb order in your Spanish a bit. Transformación Departamento is like saying Bureau Conversion in English. I know enough Spanish to know that much, at least. This is, however, all hinging on the assumption that it wasn't intentional.
Oh, and on a less important note, Canterlot Mountain could just be a volcanic plug. They're usually made of rhyolite, which is extremely hard, resistant to weathering, and would form steep or almost shear cliff faces. It can also be the dark color displayed in the show, depending on its composition.
Being a science major is hard, I have to point out things like this about stories written about cartoons for little girls!
The only thing this has to do with The Conversion Bureau, or even with My Little Pony, is some name-dropping that could be replaced or removed without having any impact on the story. It's just a straight screed about how women are good, men are evil, and testosterone is a hideous psychoactive toxin responsible for all human suffering.
Hey, if these guys ever need a "patient zero", I've got some free time. ;)
Another compelling story by Chatoyance, and one that deals with what I consider to be the most alluring aspect of Conversion Bureau stories: The purging of Humanity's greater destructive evils. I have always seen the actual conversion portion of your stories to be just a very nice added benefit to the latter subject. I guess that means your CB stories have felt more like salvation stories to me, at least, which is one of the many reasons why I love reading them (besides the phenomenal writing and believable characters). In this story in particular resonated with me quite a bit because of its emphasis on this topic, and because, call me an escapist, it seems more down to earth and dare I say possible than actual CB stories. Right, then. Now that I have made myself sound suitably insane with the previous statement, allow me to go for broke. Your story about wiping clean the sins of humanity has touched me in a way that I did not expect such a short story to do. I think it is just wondrous, and if we all get a pair of boobs (or get turned into a candy-colored equine) to go along with it, the more the merrier!
Keep up the good work, Chatoyance.
-Ristar, the Shooting Star
317207
I don't think there's anything wrong with something as completely off-the-wall as this story occasionally. It is bad science, but it's fun bad science! Besides, this has everything to do with TCB. Humanity is transformed into a superior species, but instead of magic changing humans into Ponies, we have a genetic virus (impossibly perfect and pervasive I.E. magic technology and therefore silly bad science) that turns humans into compassion-mans.
314650
I very much like these stories, particularly The Pony Singularity, The Most Decadent Thing, and Phoenix in Hooves. I would love to see any of these three turned into a larger story, if you ever decided to do so, though I am not quite sure how well that would work with Phoenix in Hooves, as you wrapped it up pretty neatly as an Equestria origins story. While reading these three, especially The Most Decadent Thing and Phoenix in Hooves, but also somewhat from The Pony Singularity, I was very much reminded of some of Isaac Asimov's work, The Last Question in particular. I got a little bit of a Ghost in the Shell vibe from The Pony Singularity, in addition to being reminded of Asimov. You have been and continue to be my favourite TCB author.
I hope my occasional teasing you for "breath" doesn't annoy you too terribly.
Hm... one was Skynet, Sunshine and Rainbows Edition. I don't think it was too many years in the future, but I can say that what we saw of it was pretty plausible. Also a dash of Apprentice Adept, if I'm not mistaken.
Two was... that's an extremely plausible future. I've always been of the opinion that humanity could eventually learn from its mistakes and collectively pull its head out of its collective ass, and I find it extraordinarily amusing that going to the extreme end of where we currently are could lead to people actually wanting to do that as the latest fad.
Three... I have to respectfully disagree on the feminist part of the message here. Wars have always been about greed, violence is simply the method men chose to utilize. Whether for control, money, or power, I can't see women being any less ruthless if they made it to the top, even though the methods would likely differ. In the case of this particular story, however, I can accept the letter if not the spirit, since most people would have been focused on the obvious evils rather than the subtle ones, which were mostly likely also removed.
Four. Highly amusing idea. Nanomachines... I do believe Cracked.com actually rated them as most likely to end the world, all but one of the others being the LHC if I remember correctly. The memory banks being damaged and resulting in ponies... yeah. From the bronies responsible, I can almost hear the 'whoops... you're welcome!' Also a highly believable future.
Five. Eh, pretty realistic take on if the Singularity wasn't so inevitable. Not really anything special otherwise. Could be expanded into a full-on revolution/espionage/underground railroad style story if you wanted, but it's not really anything other than a brief action piece as-is.
Overall... good show.
So that's why canterlot is on a hill....
This has been real eye opener Chaty. Every angle similar in result whilst altering the fundamental philosophical question. Each has left me wanting more from the subsequent universe, yet on edge to see what you’ll come up with next.
If you have anymore to add to this wonderful collection, please do hun. I’ll be watching with bated breath
And as if by plot device
That was a fun twist! I like it!
This was an incredibly weird and provocative story, quite honestly obviously designed to feature a good solid stick for poking into a hornets' nest of thought with.
It's only tangentially pony and I don't agree with every observation there (for example, I can say with absolute certainty that girls really are good at being absolute bitches), but again, that's not the point. Fantastic in multiple meanings of the word and a little disturbing. Just how I like it. Of all the universes out there though, this one holds no appeal. I'll make sure to set my Equestrian Portal for a different variation if that's alright
Out of all of them so far, this is my favourite because it is so far removed from everything. I like the way you describe this impossibly vast, ancient and impatient society of hedonists such that, as mad as it is, it makes twisted sense.
And then to have these post-humans reintegrate... fascinating. Whatever you were smoking, I want some.
Cool.
Whoa. Heavy stuff. Well done, but very intense. I wasn't expecting something this metaphysical. Not complaining, but when you aren't ready for this, it's something of a sucker punch.
328147
Yes! Each of these stories is supposed to be... a sucker punch. A complete re-envisioning of the Conversion Bureau. My goal is to show really different ways to interpret the idea of the Conversion Bureau itself, and to do so in creative and original forms. I want to blow minds here. I want to shake things up.
I'm a radical dudette: I can't play by their rules, baby.
Whoa whoa wait a minute. Ponies are supposedly immortal and they can't reproduce?
And the princesses are literally offering their realm as an after-life paradise?
*mindgasm
Somehow it feels like Doctor Who related stuff
Id just like to say, thank you, for these six masterpieces of literary creativity.
Out of all of the stories i have ever read, i don't think i have ever given so much close attention to each word that works its way thru my mind.
Stories like these, are what i seek to quench my thirst for a more open minded, and creative view of the world around me.
P.s #3 was just a tad.. awkward....
312950 Well the Singularity is roughly defined as when the human condition undergoes a fundamental change. It's called that because we don't have a concept of what is beyond it, because any predictions we make are based on the existing human thought process. So as far trans-humanism stories go, this one's premise pretty much hits the nail on the head.
>> Chatoyance
Oh fantastic! My very first story, not only my first fanfiction, not only my first TCB tale, but my VERY FIRST attempt at lengthy creative writing has trans-humanism as a recurring theme. From the description alone, I've already been outdone!
I really hate to ask from such an obviously gifted writer, but could you give this scribe a few helpful tips?