19 - Cadance Call (military cadence)
When earth ponies just tap their hoofs,
When earth ponies just tap their hoofs,
They knock down walls, collapsing roofs!
They knock down walls, collapsing roofs!
Us unicorns can't concentrate
You unicorns can't concentrate
Unless the silverware's set straight!
Unless the silverware's set straight!
Those pegasi aren't here to stay:
Those pegasi aren't here to stay:
You look too hard, they blow away!
You look too hard, they blow away!
It's crystal ponies are the best
It's crystal ponies are the best
Unless you watch while they digest!
Unless you watch while we digest!
Sound off!
One, two!
Sound off!
Three, four!
Never eat beans, now! One, two, three, four, one, two—
—Three, four!
Now, I don't know, but I've been told
Now, I don't know, but I've been told
A pony's fetlocks might get cold
A pony's fetlocks might get cold
From marching out at break of dawn
From marching out at break of dawn
With just a pack and saddle on.
With just a pack and saddle on.
And so our Princess, sweet and good,
And so our Princess, sweet and good,
Who cares for us more than she should,
Who cares for us more than she should,
Was up all night with yarn and thread
Was up all night with yarn and thread
To knit you socks, all shiny red!
To knit us socks, all shiny red!
Sound off!
One, two!
Sound off!
Three, four!
Kick up those knees, now! One, two, three, four, one, two—
—Three, four!
So shout hooray for dawn patrols!
So shout hooray for dawn patrols!
We'll skip and scamper like we're foals
We'll skip and scamper like we're foals
Forgetting that we left in bed
Forgetting that we left in bed
The princess to be here instead!
You did?? Are you a chowderhead??
Because we need the exercise
Because we need the exercise
And need to know it's plain unwise
And need to know it's plain unwise
To be the sort of stupid nut
To be the sort of stupid nut
Who calls her 'Princess Candybutt!'
Who called her 'Princess Candybutt??'
Sound off!
One, two!
Sound off!
Three, four!
Keep those eyes front, now! One, two, three, four, one, two—
—Three, four!
She's watching from her balcony!
She's what?? She's watching?? Can you see—??
So try to keep your dignity!
Oh, yeah! That's right! Our dignity!
We're soldiers: loyal, brave, and true!
We're soldiers: loyal, brave, and true!
We always see our missions through!
We always see our missions through!
And when we make a dumb mistake,
And when we make a dumb mistake,
Our friends'll help us fix the break!
Our friends'll help us fix the break!
I lead the way when we parade,
You lead the way when we parade,
But now I'm asking for your aid!
Just ask! We're ever undismayed!
Sound off!
One, two!
Sound off!
Three, four!
Thank you all truly! One, two, three, four, one, two—
—Three, four!
So sing out my apologies!
We'll sing out his apologies!
I'll even march by on my knees!
He'll even march by on his knees!
And look! They really love the socks!
You bet we really love our socks!
Despite how much your husband mocks.
We'll gladly toss him in the stocks!
I'll go if that's what she demands,
She won't. Our princess understands.
Deserving of her reprimands.
Believe us, sir: she understands.
I'm sorry, darling! You were right!
He's sorry and admits you're right!
Forgive me, please, and let's not fight!
Forgive, we beg, this noble knight!
Sound off!
One, two!
Sound off!
Three, four!
She's laughing and smiling! One, two, three, four, one, two—
—Three, four!
Company! Dismissed!
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After that last one:
This one came out as easy as pie. However easy pie is, I mean...
Mike
Heheheheheh. Poor Shiny.
Wondrous, as always
I eagerly await more
Congrats – you're featured!
4699121
In his defense:
Who ever thought ponies in socks would be a thing?
4699139
Thanks!
But I prefer short subjects to features.
Which might be too obscure a reference even for me...
Mike
Once I realized what was going on, I couldn't stop laughing. Another wonderful piece of verse, and again it fits the characters so well. Shining Armor would do something as grandiose and silly to apologize to his wife, and Cadence would have exactly the sort of sense of humor that this would be appropriate.
4702935
And they all lived:
Happily ever after. That's my motto!
Mike
I wonder how many of the soldiers sang this simply because they were ordered to, and how many did because they're bros.
4741934
Any company of folks:
Is gonna be a mixed bag, but I like to think of Armie as the kind of commander who actually inspires his troops to be better ponies than they might otherwise be.
Mike
Here via Monarch Dodora who thankfully pointed me to this older piece of yours, and very glad that happened! This was very cute. Thanks for writing!
7028919
Thanks for commenting!
The one previous to this, "Not a Love Song," is my poem from Cadance's point of view, actually. It's subtitled "Not a Pair of Sonnets" 'cause Cadance gets a little tired of sonnets in her line of work...
Mike
Cute