Usually most colts and fillies don't care for Hearts and Hooves Day, but this year almost every colt and filly finds themselves with a date for the late night festival. Some more dreamy than others. But the hot topic is Snails when they see him strolling around with one of the prettiest fillies they've ever seen. Who is she and how shall the night play out as Snails' mystery date takes him out for a fun night of dodging questions, avoiding suspicion and staving off the Cutie Mark Crusader Background Investigators, hired by an ever sceptic Snips.
In the mean time, a certain lisping redhead is on the hunt.
Chapters (1)
Your long descriptions a bit...messy.
I'm going to look at the first chapter and tell you if anything needs fixin'
Your problem here is much like a guy I edit for already.
PAST AND FUTURE TENSE DON'T BELONG TOGETHER!
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Thanks, and to be honest I skimped out on the tense editing, it's supposed to be all present but sometimes I slip back and while I'm editing other things a just forget. I'll go back to it.
When will you ever learn Snails? Nothing is better than pudding. Ever.
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Username checks out.