Batponies are a mysterious race, spoken of in hushed tones and in dark corners. Most ponies don't even believe they exist, and the batponies wouldn't have it any other way. However, when one is caught in the dead of night, she'll lay the foundation for her kind's place in Equestria with a few words.
And a simple gesture of trust.
A short story written for Equestria Daily's Batponies Writeoff!
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Lately, the fandom has taken to calling bat ponies thestrals.
3410543
It seems kinda fitting though, right?
I mean they're similar to the bat ponies.
3410543
Yep. Personally I don't understand. I only have this story for the Halloween--er, I mean, Nightmare Night contest they have going on at EQD. I think they're cool, but I fear they may soon suffer overexposure and ponies will grow tired of them. Still, I've seen some pretty niffy art of some bat ponies. You think they'll ever get a bigger part in the show?
I liked the story, well written but it's a bit difficult to read without white space between chapters.
3410941
I take it you mean 'paragraphs' and not 'chapters' right? Would it be better if I double-spaced it then? Is there a format for that on here besides just hitting enter?
Glad you liked the story so far though.
3411652
haha yea paragraphs :)
Eh some people prefer it this way others just like a normal whitespace (enter) line between each paragraph, even if the paragraph is a single line.
Was a little surprised by the jump, but I still think it's a great fiction! Just caught me off guard due to the lack of warning. Also, I'm sorry. I have no idea what you referenced.
Xiaolin Showdown.
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Bonus points awarded!!
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Good times whenever a pony is shouting in your face.
3414434
I shall warn you ahead of time then that the final chapter also jumps ahead, though it will be painfully obvious from the start. I was trying to hide the fact that this one jumped because I was going for a bit of a surprise factor.
As for the reference...look above your comment.
3414864
Aw, come on! How'd I miss that, I loved that show!
FIR-*slaps self* NO. BAD. No first comments. It's rude.
3417104
Hey, a comment's a comment. As long as it's not mean or spam, I'm good with it.
I'm sad that this story is so short D:
will you write a sequel?
Heh. It was a nice story, Zeck.
I'm a little sad to see it finished so soon, but it does give an air of... completion. So it's okay.
3418239
Sadly, it had to be short because of the word limit. It couldn't go over 10,000 words, even though I wanted to add a chapter where Shadow Echo was trying to save Luna. As for a sequel, I'm not sure. As I said, the unofficial sequel is "Luna's Adventure" because Silent Wing is there, although she's more a supporting character. That story is actually where this one came from.
But as for a full-blown sequel--whether about Shadow Echo or Silent Wing--I will have to think on it. I'd need to come up with a story worth telling first, and right now I have a huge backlog of stories that I want to write already. Glad you liked this one enough though to want to see more.
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I admit that it's not as long as my other stories, and I firmly place that blame at the word count limit. I wanted to add at least one more chapter in there, but it just would not have worked out. I'm glad you feel that it has a sense of completion though, as I was concerned that a lot of ponies would be...miffed. Felt like they were cheated out of a story or something.
That was quite good. :D It makes me wish batponies had existed in season 1, just so Luna could have some goddamn friends and the fandom wasn't so saturated with Sad Luna stories. :| This chapter was touching for that reason.
I have a suggestion! "Thou" is generally only used as a singular you (though it's used entirely incorrectly in the show, so take this as you will), so that line where she says "thou must hate me" could be rendered as "you must hate me", signalling to the reader in the know that she means all batponies, and tipping Silent Wing off that there's something wrong because she didn't say "thou". Just a thought. :)
Awww! I quite enjoy this story. I'll have to check out that other one of yours, too.
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Glad you liked it. I do often wonder how batponies would fit into the show's official universe. I find it hard to believe that, at the very least, the two pulling her chariot at the beginning aren't her friends, but we're probably over thinking something like that.
As for Luna speak, at that part I was really torn between Luna talking just to Silent Wing, or talking about all the batponies, so I chose the singular for Silent Wing, and then had Luna clear it up in the next sentence.
3502109
Glad you liked it. Always makes me smile whenever someone takes the time to comment.
If you do get around to the other story, keep in mind that Luna is the main character, not Silent Wing. So don't go in expecting another batpony story. There is a giant marshmallow though.
3503031 ...and I just finished reading that story, and loved it too.
You have any more Luna ones? What about writing what happened in the Big Mac arc? That'd be cool.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh this story was so full of feeeels. But like happy feels. I love those.
Yes. This story is perf, 10/10 would cry again. There were a few places where the wording could have been a little better, but it's perfect overall.
4035880
Yay! New comment out of nowhere. I enjoy new comments.
Glad you like the story. I wasn't sure anyone was reading this one anymore, but it still seems to be pretty popular. The writing was a bit rough and rushed in it because I had to write it quick for that Nightmare Night contest last year.
3419402 Now can you make a sequel?
4476726
Alas no, not a full Shadow Echo or Silent Wing story anyway. Silent Wing has popped up in other stories I've written, the latest being Trixie's Task. I think Silent Wing will probably join Trixie on her next adventure, but that's going to be a while.
I have to finish The Bridesmaids, and then I need to get on this Octavia and Vinyl story that I've been building to since last year, as well as Sea Swirl's story. Once at least one of those is wrapped up, then I might be able to get Silent Wing out.
I was actually going to make a story about her and the Tail Sisters inviting Discord to a Nightmare Night party--since, to me, Discord is the creator of all Bat ponies--but I just couldn't get it to work under the deadline for the Writer's Training Ground.
4479196
Xiaolin Showdown. Kimiko and Master Fung respectively
A most excellent, excellent story! Well done!
4532155
Shadow Wolf, you LIVE!
Good job on getting the Xiaolin Showdown reference too.
4533609
Aye, I do in fact live... things have just been ungodly hectic the last few months IRL so my work/reading/writing time has been limited in the extreme
And yes indeed. Was one of my favorite shows!
I couldn't feel prouder of Lunas' Night guard. Manly tears have been shed this night !!!
6338386
The Guard strives to please.
Also, yay for new comment!
Beautiful just beautiful. 10/10 stars
6398184 Why thank you. I will take all the stars. Princess Luna is very fond of them, so I'm sure she'll be pleased with your gift.
This is the first story I've read with 0 dislikes, after reading it I am unsurprised. I will mow favorite this and peruse your other works.
6782295 Why thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
And now for the part I'm not sure about, because I don't want to come across as whining, or worse, gloating--this story did have a down vote. Somepony one day went through every story I've written and down voted all of them. Or, at least the ones that didn't have a down vote already. Didn't matter what it was about, or how well it was written. I have a feeling I know who it was, but I can't prove it. Needless to say, that made me upset. So while you're browsing, any story that has only one down vote is the result of that pony. The others, not so much.
But then, for some reason, the down vote vanished about a week and a half ago, along with a few others. Not sure what happened there, but it made me smile.
Anyway, thanks for the comment, and I hope you find something else that catches your interest.
Squeeeeeeeeee!
Loved it.
7230732 Thanks! Glad you liked reading about Bats and Luna.
Loved it. Very moving, and a pleasure to read.
8064547 Hey, a new comment!
Thanks. Glad you enjoyed this story.
8065822 I didn't realize how old the story was until I saw the last comment. Still great work you should totally do oneshots of Luna with her renewed guard like slice of life stuff having her guards explain to her to terms and technologies while Luna questions why such things would be done or having Luna be introduced to the club scene. Things that are fun and silly and warming. That's just me though your story is wonderful and I love the origin of the bat ponies, it's original and is very believable.