• Member Since 3rd Sep, 2011
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Fanfiction masochist. :B She/they https://ko-fi.com/presentperfect


After she winds up inside the wrong cake, Spitfire needs to reclaim her honor as a Wonderbolt. What better way than by showing Ponyville's wealthiest resident -- and most eligible bachelor -- a night on the town? With maybe a little revenge on the side.

Part of the Crack Pairing Circleship Collab. Also a standalone story of the Whiskverse! (Familiarity with Whiskverse or CPCSC not necessary.)

Cover art by C-Puff!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 50 )

I would love to see more of this.

That? That was odd. :D

Dude, this was excellent. You were up against some hard competition with John writing his Spitfire, and the fact that the both of you came up with really convincing personalities for her makes me incredibly happy. I really like what you did with Filthy Rich's backstory -- the show gives him plenty of room to be sympathetic and you definitely took advantage of that.

And just overall a really nice job working other ponies into the story as they were needed. I tend to have terrible tunnel vision with characters in my projects, so I enjoyed how you brought Rarity, RD, and Scoots into the picture to help liven things up and move the plot along.

Why doesn't filthy rich have a character tag?

Author Interviewer


There's such a thing as a 'hardcore SpitRich shipper'? :applejackconfused:

Anyway, this story had some interesting high points. You make Spitfire nicely three-dimensional with some negative personality traits and some attitude. I think you're right about her attitude about her fans. I also think that Rainbow Dash is going to be interrogating everypony in Ponyville to try to work out what is going on.

I also liked your portrayal of Filthy Rich. I think your explanation for Diamond Tiara being... well... Diamond Tiara was as good as any I've seen so far.

So... Celly is into Spitfire in a big way? Iiinnnteresting! :raritywink:

Author Interviewer

When nine thousand years old you reach, require entertainment you will.

And I'm sure there's got to be someone out there whose greatest dream was to see these two hook up. <.< Stranger things have happened.

Thanks! :D


That was all I could think after reading your fic XD

Nice. And woah did Spitfire live up to her name.

Heh. Neat. You've given Spitfire an interesting personality. It's a bit warty, but I still like it.

So was she serious about suggesting that she could be Diamond Tiara's new mom? I'm having trouble reconciling it with her statement earlier that she can't stand foals.

Author Interviewer

...Wait, did she suggest that? c.c


"C'mon, you deserved that! Just like you deserve to treat yourself now and again. If your daughter's mom doesn't wanna be a mom, then you should think about giving her a better one."

I thought that Spitfire was suggesting that she be the better mom. I guess that's not what you meant.

Author Interviewer

Ohhh. Absolutely not, but I see how that could be read into it easily. :B

The random number pairing idea is great. I should try doing that. Also, this story was great.

Author Interviewer

I'll tell you, I went through three rolls before I got this one. :B I was not about to ship Gilda and/or Doctor Whooves.

Haha. Oh, wow, I would read the heck out of that. A nice adventure story, in the same vein as Doctor Who. Gilda would make an awesome, tough companion.

Okay, this was awesome!

Got a little info dumpy in the dialogue at points and I think I would have preferred Spitfire's narrative voice match her personality as a dumb idiot who is wrong about lots of things (Ponyville, Rainbow Dash, what day it is, etc.) a bit more, but goddamn if this isn't very fine crackshipping.

This can't be a crackfic, it is way too well written, thought out and executed! I thoroughly enjoyed this one and I thank you for the story good author!


This question came up a while back.

Some noticeable one-episode characters like Cranky Doodle and Matilda, Lightning Dust, Photo Finish, Sapphire Shores, Hoity Toity, Blueblood, etc. got tags because they were instantly recognizable and it was speculated that a lot of stories would end up being written about them instead of your average background pony. Filthy Rich apparently got lost in the shuffle...

When Cloud Kicker and Blossomforth started becoming more popular, Knighty was asked by their fans what it would take to get them their own character tags. The answer was simple: prove that they deserve one based on stories about them, not just stories where they happen to show up in the background. The more stories like this one that exist, the more likely it will be that Filthy Rich graces the options under character tags.

It took Cloud Kicker starring in about 35 stories (and a fan club named for her) before she "earned" her tag, and since then, she's up to at least 50. Blossomforth is still "other," but had reached about 30 stories at last count.

Back to Filthy Rich... basically, a story like this would qualify as a "taggable" story for Mr. Rich. If a story were to focus on Diamond Tiara, with Filthy Rich appearing as a tertiary character (even if he has a poignant line or two), probably not so much.

TL;DR version: He needs more stories like this written about him.

This was a fun story.:rainbowlaugh:

Like, fav and added to my recommendation group.

Even if I'm not a huge fan of Spitfire ships besides SpitSoar, this was amazing. Just blew me away how you nailed Spitfire's personality and managed to make this crack pairing work.


Yep. My thoughts exactly as well!

This was brilliant. I just love it when people do crackships seriously.

A good crackship will seem utterly silly until after all is said and done: then it seems workable. A GREAT crackship makes you feel stupid that something so obviously perfect wasn't tried before. Alot of crackships fall flat because one or the other character just doesn't seem developed enough, or at least their reasons aren't developed enough, for the shipfic to work. This is one of the best CrackShips ever. It's genuinely funny, romantic, and hell even a bit adventurous! Going in I was cursing your name because it couldn't possibly work, now I curse your name because there isn't a sequel!

So, er, I forgot to comment, cos I hit the sack shortly after reading.

I really liked this, despite what you said about how you'd have to rewrite it or its popularity. Why has it got this reception? Because it's a crackship done well. And it's funny. And Spitfire's sexy.

Combine all three and you've got a delicious ice cream sundae with Spitfire's panties on top. Yum yum.

But seriously, it's very well done, even when canon has destroyed what it suggested. Spitfire's character is brilliant, it blends well with Filthy Rich's, and the antics in here were brilliant, especially Spitfire being drunk inside the cake. She's both evil and benevolent, which makes her a well-rounded likable character. Especially more so, considering this follows her perspective.

I'd love to see another Spitfire crackship from you someday. Not that I'm gonna pressure you or anything.

Author Interviewer

I'd just like to write a normal ship with her sometime ;_;

One small suggestion: "... felt a sense of duty on top of everything else." You seem to have forgotten an ending quotation.

Author Interviewer

She continues speaking in the next paragraph, so it's not necessary. :B

Site Blogger

This was a lot of fun! Really good.

Author Interviewer

Thankya. :D


I loved how fun it was to read, especially the end. I think Rainbow's crush on Spitfire just shattered. Also I did like how she had a few change of views after witnessing Rainbow with Scootaloo or sampling some of what Ponyville has to offer

I reviewed this story as part of Read It Later #47.

My review can be found here.

"I hate foals."
He laughed at that.
"No, seriously, I do. I don't ever want my own, and I don't wanna deal with other ponies' either."
"But surely you've got foals for fans, right?"
I nodded. "Yeah, but that's different. With a fan, you say hi, you ask their name, you give 'em an autograph or a photo op, you listen to their dreams and give 'em a few words of encouragement. And then. They. Leave."

Yep, really do not like Spitfire. My dad was someone who wasn't fond of kids until he and my mom had me, so I just view people who hate kids to be uncommitted, not understanding of kids (many of whom are smarter than they are taken for), and missing out on a lot of love. It's just a personal belief of mine, considering my own father changed his views REAL quick when I was born and he got to experience that love for himself.

Author Interviewer

Don't be so quick to judge. Usually people who aren't interested in kids know their own shortcomings, and it's a good idea to let them decide whether or not they want to deal with raising them. Better not to than foist a child on someone who's going to be a terrible parent.

8153479 Okay, I guess you're right about that, but still, in the case of SOME adults, it seems rather unfair to children.

Oh my gosh, Spitfire's the beessttt:rainbowwild:

This was fantastic! This was my favourite line:

Wow. That's pretty devious for a filly. No wonder I hate kids.

And then she went into greater detail about it later :rainbowlaugh:

There's a comment below from 2015 where you said you'd like to write a normal ship story for Spitfire. How's that looking these days?

Author Interviewer

Who the fuck is Spitfire?

9077111 Oh dear. Well, it was still worth asking :twilightsheepish:

Author Interviewer

Actually, the answer is she'll be among the main ships in The Princess's Captain. Eventually. :B So yeah?

Well, that was pretty cute. A little silly/rough at times, but cute. Spitfire sure is fast though (hehe).

However, I think I found one aged typo :rainbowlaugh:

What the hay did was that supposed to mean?

A leftover "did" from the previous version of the sentence?

Author Interviewer

>tfw did was that supposed to be right :B

Thanks! Glad you enjoyed. :D

"You're not married, are you?" I hadn't noticed any mare in the house. No sense in being forward.

He cleared his throat. "Um, well... no, I'm not married."

I nodded and grinned. "Then it's a date! Pick you up at seven!"

Yeah I know this is during the time spoiled Rich came into the picture in season 5 I still think Filthy Rich should fine a better girl then spoiled

And then it hit me: I knew this pony. I knew her, and she wasn't exactly high on my list of ponies I'd ever wanted to meet again. I had to make a decision: hide behind my best crowd-pleaser smile and pretend she hadn't almost killed me once, or let her know who I was and see where that got me.

Oh yeah that's right she probably remembers her back in the best flyer competition and not really to remember because she almost got the other three Wonderbolts killed when she knocked them out when they try to save her from falling

I enjoyed this tho I wish there where more ships like this it's rare to come by

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