Re-written
Maple Leaf is a pegasus who leaves his home in the clouds to find his cutie mark.
Angelic Note is a shy unicorn with an angelic voice who hasn't yet learned how to use magic and is bullied by her schoolmates.
Seam Stress is a high strung perfectionist earth pony with a flair for fashion.
This is the story of how these three ponies began a friendship that would last their entire lives.
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Welcome to the re-written Chapter 1 of Foalhood. It's about the same length as the original but the original chapter has been split into two pieces. Chapter 2 is done and I've just started re-writing chapter 2 (3) I'm also looking for cover artists for this and the next 2 "books" of this. Any artists interested please comment here or PM me.
Think there needs to be a 'lived' before the word 'so.'
Off to a good start here. *clicks next chapter button*
You repeat this in the next line. One of them needs to go.
Really the only main reason I can see that this isn't getting much attention is because it's all OCs. That's NOT a bad thing, it's just an observation. Also, it would help if we got some background info on the main character. Have him introduce himself and maybe get a basic rundown of his life so far, aka: Why does he live with his aunt and uncle? Why did they move from Cloudonia to wherever they are now? How did he feel about that? etc.
It's a cute story.
This is a great story! I look forward to more.