Winter's Afternoon Sitdown
You sit in the alleyway as close to the fire as it will allow, trying desperately to keep warm. If the Crystal Empire wasn’t always freezing enough during the winter, it sure is today. The chilling air hangs heavy with the gray skies pouring down icy flakes and pelting hail. Your lungs suck in the frigid air and you gasp with pain in mid-breath. As your visible breath escapes your mouth, it almost appears that it’s turning to ice along with the rest of the dropping hail. Your body shivers violently, having only a rough, tattered tunic to cover it from the blizzard-like weather.
With just one, small fire, you can only keep one side of you warm at one time. So you turn around for the umpteenth time so the fire can unfreeze your numb backside. Suddenly, the numbness of your back is replaced by a burn from the flames’ heat that rudely awakens your sleeping nerves, and your overheated front is introduced once more to the exacerbated, biting cold. The pains on both sides won’t pass, and you hug yourself tighter as you pray for the snow to stop after it’s been going for hours.
The falling snow has been collecting on your shoulders, and as you feel them start to weigh down, you sacrifice the warmth of your extremities to save those from frostbite. A thousand needles prick you when you brush off the snow, and you quickly wipe it onto your tunic, which is starting to collect ice itself. You don’t have to worry about wind concerning the side opposite to the fire because it’s bounded by a stone wall, but the other end of the alleyway is blocked only by a cotton sheet that you hung up earlier to block the view of street-goers, just in case anypony insane enough to be out here now crosses by.
Suddenly, the wind picks up and rushes through the sheet. It howls like a feral wolf that has found its prey.Yet, as the icy wind hits you, you can only moan in agony and hope it passes soon. In this state of heightened misery, you try to retreat into your mind to escape, but as soon as you do so, the bitterness in your heart bites at you three times colder than even this snowstorm. You remember why you are here in the first place, a memory that you were firmly avoiding. Nonetheless, it comes back, permanently imprinted upon your soul.
You didn’t do anything to deserve this; you’re a good person. You might have broken a few rules here and there, but who were they to tell you that you couldn’t do that? You didn’t hurt anybody. You just saved your own property from the greedy crown that wanted to squander it on worthless projects. Granted, you weren’t exactly going to tell anypony about this when you did it, and when the tax collectors came knocking on your door, you did almost make it out of the city, but that means your only “crime” was resisting arrest. It was your money and the crown didn’t have any right to tell you how you should spend it.
Yet for all that you argued and complained, even when you stood before the princesses themselves unafraid, they just took it from you in the end. But that wasn’t even it. They took more than they should have, and before you could blink, your bank account was completely empty! Righteous fury welled up inside of you, and you decided to do what was right. Stealing into the palace, you took back what was rightfully yours from the treasury; you even let them keep their “share.” Yet somehow they knew; somehow they discovered the justice you had done in secret, and the princesses finally committed the ultimate evil: they banished you from Equestria.
Forced into the Crystal Empire, you decided to be the better person, put the matter out of your mind, and start a new life here. You arrived in autumn, but to your surprise, it quickly turned to winter, and still nopony would give you a job. Everywhere you went, the people whose minds were poisoned by the Equestrians’ decree turned you away until you had no other place to go. And the days turned from brown and orange to grey and white. To make matters worse, you even have to hide your presence, as it sounded like the city guards didn’t approve of the homeless— as if that were some kind of crime too! The cold is too much for any sane person to bear. But here you are anyway, threatened by the frost both in body and in spirit.
When the arctic wind finally passes, everything is quiet again, and you sigh in temporary relief. Maybe that was the worst of it. It seems that the snowfall is lighter than earlier, and though you still shake and quiver in the hostile environment, you slightly relax your tight bear hug on yourself. As time goes by, the fire seems to burn less, and even the sky somehow seems less gray. Even in your narrow view, obscured by the adjacent buildings you are between, you are able to see faint pockets of sunlight piercing the clouds. You let out another sigh of relief and turn around to face the fire and the sheet.
Your heart skips a beat. The sound of hoofsteps in the snow pierces the dead silence, and a burly, male voice not too far away says, “I am sure they were this way, your highness.” The hoofsteps continue their approach, and your nervousness intensifies when two sets of hooves stop right in front of your enclosure. Fearing that the guards may have found you, you hold your breath, but then that fear turns to sheer horror. You realize that the fire must be announcing your position to the whole city, when the sheet was supposed to be concealing it from civilians like you had hoped.
With your heart pounding in your chest, you look behind you and gauge the height of the wall. If you jumped, you just might be able to climb over it. Knowing that you have little time to spare, you look back and freeze but not because of the cold. Standing right in front of you is a tall royal guard, a unicorn dressed in the country’s silver armor with twice the muscle you have. He takes a single look at you and says to the pony accompanying him, “And here we are, your majesty.”
It is actually not so much the sight of the guard that drives you to panic, but instead the one whom he addresses. She has a kind but blissful smile on her face, and her eyes gleam with a vibrant purple. Her coat is colored a soft pink, and the locks of her mane are a light rose, yellow, and violet, rolling into bouncing curls at their ends. Her physique is delicate indeed, but you have to hold back a gasp when you see a pair of wings tipped with the matching violet as well as a horn twice the length of the guard’s.
This divine form becomes even more shocking, when you easily recognize the regalia and symbols she bears. A diadem of gold with points curved rests atop her head, and around her neck she bears a necklace of the same fashion. Finally, horror and realization meet when your eyes fall on her flank, on which is emblazoned a cutie mark that boasts a heart of pure diamond, embedded in a frame of pure gold. Surely, this is Mi Amore Cadenza, princess of the Crystal Empire, unchallenged leader of this region.
When the electricity in your chest loses its sting, your heart is still threatening to burst of out of your breast. Whether or not you did anything worthy of arrest here, the empress herself stands in the threshold of your makeshift doorstep, and you can only imagine what she has come for, though something tells you that you’d rather not find out. You may not have been exiled from the Crystal Empire proper, but it seems you aren’t welcome here, if she herself hunted you down like this. With so little time to react then before either the awesome magic from her horn or the body of this burly guard descend upon you, your only option appears.
You turn around as fast as possible and jump with all your might, just barely taking purchase on the top of the wall above. At that moment, you hear the princess call out, “Wait!” and the guard, “Halt!” yet in your frenzied panic, your front limbs have ample strength to lift your heavy mass up, and you vault over the stone barrier. The ground on the other side quickly rushes towards you, and you strike it with jarring force. Seeing the exit of the alley on the other side, however, the impact is barely felt. Your legs take off towards the freedom of the streets leading to the edge of the city. If you just reach there, you can certainly make it to the suburbs.
With this hope you charge forward and the stones of the alley walls fly past you. Soon, you reach the corner and practically sail around it. The sun breaks through the clouds and pours light into your eyes. The way ahead is clear. Not entirely familiar with these streets, you rush down the left side through the empty market district, wincing as you breathe in large gulps of cold air. For a moment, it looks like you might have a straight shot to the city limits, but then you hear a sound like thunder behind you. Against your better instinct you glance behind.
To your horror, you count five royal guards charging in full armor towards you. Chills run down your spine, but there’s no time to be afraid. You look forward again and run harder, with each passing second making you more and more aware of the stallions’ thundering, compared to the progressively softening sound of your step. And with each step, you feel great urge to give up. The guards are probably well fed, but you can’t remember the last time you ate. You can feel it as what little energy you have left starts to ebb away.
Then as you pass by a group of buildings, your heart leaps up in your throat when you hear what sounds like more guards in front of you. True to your fear, fifty feet ahead a second company of armor-clad soldiers rounds a corner and barrels towards you to close a pincer. Looking behind frantically and seeing that the ones behind you are also closing the gap alarmingly fast and seeing how there’s no way you can go around those in front, it looks like it might be all over. However, looking around frantically, you suddenly see that not ten feet to your right, there is another alleyway. Seeing it as your only option, you change course and take off towards it.
The gap flies towards you as fast as before with your panic-driven speed, and you quickly see that there is a clear left turn in this alleyway. You rush into it and shoot around the wall. As soon as you do so, you suddenly see in front of you an arch, the very one at the front of the city! Seeing that you are so close to being home free, a second wind hits your tiring body. You steal through this last passage with all your strength and reach the end.
But just as you do, you see a burly figure step into your way from around the corner. You slam into him with shocking force against his heavy armor, and slump down immediately on the cold, hard ground as the blackness of unconsciousness overtakes you.
[/hr]
You feel a soft cushion against your head. It feels so much better than the walls and cardboard you’ve been using for pillows all this time that you can’t help but rub your cheek against the soft fabric. Wait, you think. Something is wrong here. You open your eyes quickly and see another figure in front of you. You sit up slightly and then nearly jump out of your skin again when you recognize that shade of pink and that cutie mark again. You’re sitting in a living room, and right in front of you is Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. Where the heck are you?
“Well, you’re in the castle,” the alicorn answers with hesitant sympathy in her voice. “After you fainted, we couldn’t leave you in the snow.”
Gradually, the memories of what just happened come back to you, and you recall the panic of being practically hunted down. But what for? Why are you even here?
“Well, I just thought we could have a little talk,” she says.
Why? You ask. A chill creeps up your spine as you ask this question. Princesses don’t deal with people like you. What did you do wrong? Is it a crime to be homeless?
“No, of course not,” she says apologetically. “You didn’t break any law in the Crystal Empire. I just couldn’t leave you out there like that.”
Then they didn’t arrest you, and you can leave?
“Well, yes,” she says, “But I hoped we could talk first.” Her voice quickly rises with a tone of hopeful pleasantness.
You ignore her and turn around. Seeing a door behind you, you get up and head for it. There’s no reason to be here any longer. Associating with royalty, especially those on this level in the hierarchy is a mistake. But when you reach the door and turn the knob, you find that it’s locked. You whirl around at find the princess smiling as though she’s amused. This is confusing. If you can leave, then why is the door locked?
“I thought you might try to get up and leave like this,” she answers. “I just want to give you a chance to think, before you go.”
You don’t want to be discussing your recent business with Equestria, which is why you’re here, you know; so you explain to her it’d be best if you left.
Still, she smiles and says, “Come on. Think about it. Do you really want to go back out there?” She points to the large window on the right side of the room. It’s snowing again and the glass is almost totally covered in frost.
No, you really don’t want to go out there. An involuntary sigh escapes your lips, and you regretfully walk back over and sit back on the sofa opposite her.
Slowly, she unfolds and extends her right wing. Then she raises an unshod hoof and moves it towards herself, beckoning you to sit beside her.
It takes a second before you see her intention. When you realize it, you scoot over to the left side of your couch as far away from her as you can. You can talk with her if you have to, but there’s no way that you can cuddle up against somepony who would throw you into the dungeon just as easily as she would feed you a meal.
Seeing your reluctance, she giggles. There is a charming and beautiful note in her laughter that somehow seems to lessen your mistrust of her. She seems so friendly. Quickly, you have to take caution and remind yourself to be on your guard. A small chill creeps up your spine as you start to convince yourself. She’s acting nice now, but if you don’t yield, that laugh will become a sentence to your doom. Nonetheless, she sees the scowl that’s crept up on your face in defense. She twitches her wing, waving the feathers around and renewing her invitation. “Come on, frownypants. I know that you’re still cold. Let’s get warm.”
A snort of disapproval almost lets itself out of your nostrils. The familiarity in her voice was nearly infuriating at first. But as the seconds passed by with the offer still on the table, you realize that the room is a little chilly. Oh well. It’s probably best to not make her angry. Slowly you get up and lay your rear down on the other end of her sofa, leaning into the end away from her.
She looks at you with a smirk and rolls her eyes. Unfortunately for you, her wings are long. She leans over just a little, and the end of her wing catches your far shoulder. With little time for you to react, she gives you a little nudge towards her. The appendage is stronger than you thought. To keep yourself from falling directly onto her, you have to take purchase ahead with your front limbs and then quickly shift your posterior towards her. In the end, you’re right beside her, just like she wanted.
Up close, her wingspan seems even larger now as her right one wraps itself completely around your side. You find yourself pressed against her cozy fur on one side and with her strong, though incredibly soft wing on the other. When she shifts the appendage, you can feel each of the many feathers gently caressing you. Despite the awkwardness of the situation, you cannot help but feel relief as the warmth from her body seeps into yours.
When your body reacts, moving positively against the feeling, she laughs again and asks, “Was that so hard?” A twinge of loss passes over you. You don’t want to give her the satisfaction that you’re enjoying her company, but your body is betraying you. Still, her cheery mood is starting to get to you, and you can’t find a clever but conservative response. Instead, she asks, “So, what brings you to the Crystal Empire?”
The question strikes you as odd. She already knows that you’re homeless. Moreover, not many ponies are exiled, so it’s likely that the princesses of Equestria told her about you. Then you realize ... she knows exactly why you’re here, but she just wants to hear you say it. A charge of anger burns through you uncontrollably, and you can’t help but tell her with spite. You kept what was yours and got caught trying to get it back.
“Oh,” she says with a voice that somehow retains its blissfulness. “I remember you. You were exiled.” You guessed it spot on. Now she’s playing games with you. So what will she do now? Is she going to kick you out too?
“Well, I’m glad you came here. Whatever you did, I’m glad to welcome you as my subject if you are truly sorry for what you did.”
Sorry? Why in Tartarus would you be sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong. You pleaded innocence and you’re going to stand by it.
The princess turns her head and looks into your eyes. She doesn’t look angry. In fact there’s an amused confidence in her eye. “You think what you did was right?” she asks.
The answer couldn’t be more clear. You lived in Canterlot for a long time, but it didn’t take any more than a few months living with nobility to answer that for you. In Canterlot, you look out for yourself, and you beat down anypony who tries to stop you before they do the same to you. There’s always that strange group of unicorns like Fancypants who say that honesty gets you places, but you know that they’re just liars and thieves themselves. There is really only one law: true justice is looking out for yourself and making sure everything works to your advantage. If you have to do something questionable to get that advantage, you better do it. Just make sure that nopony can prove you did it. The only reason you’re in this position now is that you made a mistake, and somepony found an advantage in ratting you out.
The empress hears your thoughts on this, and you are expecting her to lash out at you. But to your surprise, her expression softens and she smiles. She speaks and her voice comes out in a mix of compassion and understanding. “Do you really think that justice is all about looking out for yourself?”
After all you’ve been through, you are more than certain the answer is yes.
“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way, but tell me, do you think it’s a good thing to obey your princess?”
Why would it be? Princesses are just like everyone else. They do everything they can for their own good, just like everypony else, and they make laws to secure their own advantage. If you say that it’s right to follow princess’ laws, then you have to assume that they can’t make bad laws. But that’s totally wrong. Princesses can make bad laws, and following those bad laws that don’t even work for their own benefit is injustice.
This seems like common sense, but the pink alicorn just shakes her head. “So you think that all we princesses do is what’s good for ourselves?”
It sure looks like it to you.
Princess Cadence looks at you for a moment, and then asks, “Have you ever been sick before?”
You blink. What kind of question was that? Who hasn’t been sick?
“And when you were sick, did you ever go to the doctor?”
You almost snort with the sheer obviousness emanating from that question. Everybody’s been to the doctor.
“Alright then,” she says with a newly cheerful note in her voice. “Did the doctor help you get better?”
Isn’t that what doctors do?
“So then did the doctor practice medicine to heal you, or did he do it to get money?”
It first occurs to you that the doctor did it to heal you, but then you remember he only did it to serve his self-interest. If you hadn’t paid him, he wouldn’t have healed you. He had to have done it for the money.
She shakes her head at this, but her tone doesn’t change. “Oh, come on. Don’t be that way. Doctors practice medicine right?” That goes without saying. “But why was medicine created in the first place?”
This question suddenly sends an uneasy feeling over you, and you think you might know where she’s going with this. Something tells you that you don’t want to answer, but then her wing rubs your back reassuringly. The feeling of the soft feathers gliding over you again is tranquilizing, and it makes you somehow content with answering anyway.
When you tell her the obvious, she asks, “So then if nopony was sick, then doctors wouldn’t exist, right.” You know that they wouldn’t. “So then doctors are there to help people, right?”
You don’t really have another choice but to agree. It takes you a moment of reluctant hesitation, but then you have to say that she’s right.
She smiles and happily says, “Very good. So then is it hard to say that princesses rule in order to help people, and not to help themselves?”
You can’t respond for a long time. The obvious answer hits and then starts to itch like a mosquito has bitten you. As the seconds pass, the implications of what Cadence is saying start to bother you until your annoyance becomes progressively more unbearable. Soon, the fear you have of her starts to fade out and is replaced by anger. What kind of craziness is she talking about? Of course princesses only rule for their own good. It seems insane that you’re even having this discussion. Eventually you can bear the mounting frustration no more.
You throw her wing off of you and stand up, staring her in the eye with rage abundant. Who is she to tell you all about people’s motivations? Princesses are the strong, whose purpose it is to prey upon the weak, just like the bat ponies care for and fatten up sheep, so they can later use them for themselves. Princesses would take all of their subjects possessions away if they could, but they know they can’t because that would mean they couldn’t take even more away later. They are thieves just like everypony else in the end. The only difference between them and the common street pickpocket is that they are smart about what they steal.
You sputter these ideas at her, as best as you are able to convey them in your own words, with the blood rushing furiously through your veins. You’re tired of having ponies try to cheat you after all this time, and you’re sure as hay aren’t about to say that the very rulers that sent you into this horrible mess now didn’t do it just to take everything you had away for themselves.
Having accused her of daylight robbery, you are sure now that she’s going to throw you into the dungeon. But how can you be afraid of that? At least they’ll feed you in the dungeon. Still, despite your confidence, oddly enough, Princess Cadence only laughs again, and says, “Ok, calm down. Sit with me, and let’s talk about this.” She rubs the space next to her with a hoof.
For a moment, you don’t even consider sitting back down. How can you share a seat with one of the people who ripped you off and threw you out into the cold? But she seems adamant on it, and continues to beckon you like before. You stand your ground at first, but as the chill from the sweat from your episode starts to set in, you start to want to be back there again. There’s a moment of conflict, when you fight between giving her more ground and your own physical comfort, but then you decide that you taking her warmth up is just as good as stealing from her anyway, so sitting with her wouldn’t be a sin.
After the soft cushion of the seat and the warmth of her body return to you, she starts again, still using that condescendingly joyful tone that only makes you angrier as the seconds go by. “So you mean that we princesses only rule to get more money?”
This seems to be evident to you after what the Equestrians did to you.
“But doesn’t getting paid mean that they did a service?”
You have to agree, but you know that doesn’t mean that they would do their job for charity.
“But you know that as a princess, I get a fixed salary, right?”
You knew that, but you didn’t really think about it until now. It still doesn’t change anything. More tax money doesn’t mean more bits in their pocket, but it does mean more that they can control.
“Let me ask this then: If I make a bad law, and people suffer for it, do I get paid less? Or do I control more or less money?”
You pause at this. Once again, that uneasy, sinking feeling passes over you. You know she is wrong, but you can’t help but feel she’s about to go somewhere very unpleasant. Though when she looks at you with her kind, purple eyes, gently demanding an answer in the most infuriating way, you finally stammer out through gritted teeth that she is right.
“But what if I make a good law that ponies all around benefit from?” the princess asks. “Do I get paid more then?”
You are compelled to say that she doesn’t.
“Then do you think I do it for the money?”
It seems you’re compelled to agree. In the absence of an alternative, you are lost for a moment, wondering what else to say. When she doesn’t press you for anything else immediately, you are left to think and wonder how you can reconcile this. You know that she receives some benefit from it but what is that benefit? Then it occurs to you that she must do it for the glory. Every day you always remember having to bow to the princesses as they passed through the streets. You can only guess the pleasure that they would get from it. That must be it then.
Cadence giggles at this, to your intense disdain. “Do you think my subjects are happy when I act all high and mighty around them?”
You sure aren’t.
“Then doesn’t it only make it harder for me if I rule with an ego?”
This refutation exhausts your patience, and you cannot help but get madder. What else is there? What other benefits do princesses get from ruling? She smiles and directs your view downward. You look around until you finally get fed up with looking and ask what it is she wants you to see.
Then Cadence finally says, “My cutie mark, it means love. Didn’t you know?”
Seething wrath wells up in you at this. It comes upon you like a storm, washing freezing rain water onto you. What does love have to do with this? Never mind that she has a mark of it on her flank. What does that have to do with ruling?
Ignoring the hate in your outburst, she answers, “I never wanted to rule as a princess. But I was trained do it anyway, because nopony else could do it the way I could. I didn’t like the idea either just like you. My job was to tell people what they could and couldn’t do, but I wanted to help people if I could. I wanted to make their lives better. That’s what made me happy.
“But when I came here and saw how people were after Sombra’s reign, I knew that I could help them. They were afraid. Sombra taught them how to fear, and because of that they did bad things. But I know that love is what destroys fear. Sometimes that meant I had to punish ponies for being evil so that the victims would be comforted. But I always did that with love so the ponies who did bad things wouldn’t be so hurt that they would do more evil. And now I’m so glad that I rule the Crystal Empire, because ponies love me back. They want to obey me because I care for them, and they protect me just as I watch over them.”
As she speaks, gradually the anger begins to fade from you. When you perceive the sincerity in her voice, you ask how it is that she could be lying. Everything she says makes so much sense. How she loves her people is evident, not only from her words now. You begin to see it: how the crystal ponies love her back. You’ve heard them talking about her in the streets and all the good things they say about her. What she says is true.
And in the end, you are left with an empty feeling. Why didn’t you feel that kind of love in Equestria? How is it that Cadence gets some benefit from being good to her subjects rather than bad? For that matter, why can’t the same work for you? You remember you were once in that crowd, back in Equestria, when you did good, until the stronger unicorns stomped on you. Why didn’t people love you there?
And then it finally occurs to you that you never really did try all that hard to do anything for anybody else without expecting something in return. You always did your best before, but that was always when you knew people would reward you because of the return they got. Yet somehow it sounds like Cadence loved people first, and then they loved her back. And finally the worse realization hits you: she isn’t the one freezing in the snow when there are still bad people in the country. How many ponies are like you, who want bad things to happen to the princesses for their misfortunes? And yet the princesses are still here, unharmed. In fact, they are all the more happy because of it.
At last, you finally start to think about how you stole from the princesses when they were doing their just duty, and you remember how you tried to get away with it, and how angry you were because of it. Then it dawns on you that you were in the wrong, and they were simply doing what you gave them no other choice but to do. A somber and cold chill sweeps over you as you realize that you deserve all of this, and all the pain of the position you are in.
As you sit there at the pink alicorn’s side, she takes notice of your gloomy, glazed over stare. But instead of gloating over her victory, she lifts her hooves and puts them around your neck. Then as she pulls you into a full, comforting hug, both of her wings wrap around you, and she says, “It’s okay,” knowing what is going on in your mind. “You don’t have to worry about all that anymore. I don’t care what you did in the past; I love you.”
Her words pierce your cold heart like a spear. What kind of crazy pony loves an evil person? What insanity is this that she loves you, a total stranger and an exile? You try to rationalize it, but it doesn’t make any sense. The sheer confusion is overwhelming beyond what you can stand.
Then she says it again. “I love you, my subject.”
Tears finally spring up in your eyes, and when she rubs your back soothingly, it’s all you can do to not lose control. All this time people have hated you, and you hated them back. You thought you were among the enlightened, one of those who knew the end justified the means. But this princess, this person whose job it is to punish evil is hugging you like you are her dearest and most cherished friend.
Finally, you let go in her embrace. Despite how strong you are and what you’ve gone through, despite how you haven’t cried in so many years, you start bawling, crying like a newborn foal. It starts with just a few shaky sobs, but eventually you’re practically wailing. You feel a twinge of embarrassment, as you think that this isn’t acceptable behavior, but she just hugs you tighter and coos in your ear, utterly destroying any restraint you once had.
It is a long, emotional and cleansing cry, as you feel like all the stress and torment of the years that you’ve experienced when you held back your cries of pain is now washing away. In the Crystal Empire, you no longer have to be afraid of anypony trying to harm you or steal from you or tell you that you’re worthless. And you have an alicorn princess to protect you from that. What remains therefore is lasting peace, and the relief of that realization is so intense, that you cannot help but cry all the harder.
Eventually your shuddering sobs in her embrace die down, but she just keeps rubbing your back reassuringly and telling you that it’s going to be alright. The flow of tears gradually stops, and you find it within yourself to return the hug. The intimate moment continues for a lasting eternity, so it seems.
Then finally, Cadence draws back. Once more with her happy voice and cheerful smile, she looks you in the eyes and asks, “So, how would you like a job in the palace?”
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Great story man! But DAAAAMN, dude; those feels!!!!
I love these kinds of stories; I just can't get enough of 'em!
Flames-
!! That's my OC's problems! How did you know!? Being a interdimentual wolf isn't fair!
Dam bro this really made me think bout what friendship is.... The mix of feeels and pondering is making my body hurt. Im glad I read this and that people understand the concept of love. In their own way.
Simply beautiful
What if... The OC was Flash Sentry?
3290213 Wow, I...
Headcannon accepted!
Cadence's and our main character's arguments reminded me of Plato's Republic now that I think of it a little if only because of the Doctors and medicine bit.
3290988
Someone has a good eye. If you look closely, you're more right that you know. The beginning before the main character gets angry with Cadence is even a reformatting of Socrates' argument against the misnaming of justice as the advantage of leaders. It had to be reformatted of course, because the premise that it is just to obey princesses was denied; so it seems to work against Cadence in the beginning.
Bravo!
3289619
).
I'm very glad to hear that. I hear so often that people generally don't enjoy reading second person stories because they don't like ideas being put in their head and words in their mouth. It was actually difficult for me to write in such a way that I wouldn't be imposing anything that wasn't completely necessary (for example, you get to choose whether or not you're a pony or a human in this story
But at the same time I really wanted to make my readers feel like they really were in this situation, and that because of what they'd been through, they held certain opinions, which maybe they wouldn't otherwise hold. Yet as you can see, that was for a reason: It was done to show the value and goodness of cadence's character, and to make the reader truly place themselves in that position in order to see it.
Good show. Very heartfelt message, and even with it being a 2nd person fic, it didn't come off as awkward or any of those stereotypes of 2nd persons you see around the site. In fact, I think it capitalizes on the 2nd person aspect to drive home its message in a way that it couldn't do in 1st or 3rd person. Plus, it's about Cadance, too, which is totally awesome :wishingtherewasacadanceemoticon:
Keep up the good work!
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I'll get around to reading this eventually, if only because it uses my profile picture.
very cool story! especially the part where cadence hugs you
This was an absolutely riveting story in a very odd way. It felt like I was being introduced to this strange, alien train of thought, yet it was written in a way that invited me to entertain it, to put myself in someone else's shoes and investigate what would drive them to think like this. To me, the story feels like a tale of love overcoming hate, and how understanding and forgiveness are more important than simply locking people in a dungeon.
Truly, this is a triumph of literature.
I get this bad feeling from reading this, like the kind that says, don't stick your hand in the alligators mouth kind of feeling.
I'm interested in his back story though with his situation of getting in trouble with the law.
And finally unnamed narrator has won the war over himself.
He loves the princesses.
Good show. Too bad the politicians and tyrants of this world aren't quite as utopian as the Cadence of your tale. Ah well. Eventually, death will free us all from the evils of man.
Damn....all of that was love, and friendship. it gave true meaning to the words, Kindness, and Friendship....i admit i cried a LITTLE bit...im ok though..
....
....
I really liked this, it was nicely done
I always adore stories which kinda take up the task of explaining why the princesses aren't exactly selfish despotic tyrants, since lotsa people seem to forget... And also, it was definitely a nice insight into the mind of a Canterlot noble. Makes it somewhat easier to understand them, and what lies beneath the pompous display they put on in the show.
3292102 You're not the only one who got a little emotional, especially towards the end!
This was really good! Your usage of 2nd person was off putting at first but as the story unfolded it made sense. Bravo sir. Bravo.
3292005 Sad but true. "And when the nuclear fires finally die, and the last echoes of life disappear, the planet will heal itself. With time."
You do your namesake well with this story; having studied philosophy, I couldn't help but have flashbacks to Plato's Republic.
Have a thumbs up for this well executed 2nd person fic.
It's so hard for me to reconcile stories like this coming from the same person who upset me so much with the story about Nightmare Moon returning and enslaving Celestia. But that doesn't mean I don't enjoy these "lighter" ones.
I would love to see "me" send a correspondence to Canterlot, apologize, and what the response would be.
That was sweet (nothing else to say lol)
I say, old boy. A touching ficlet.
3292849
Because I think this deserves a response, I had in mind to give a long, logical explanation, but let it suffice to say this: My first and dearest love as a writer will always be the exploration of deep moral questions that will hopefully lead my readers to ask questions of themselves and their lives and how they might live them better in light of the answers to these questions. Through this, I hope that I can make the world a better place.
For a small time, I confess, I had lost sight of this goal, the prize for which I was striving, and hence I deviated down a road which I now shun. Yet I while I am ashamed of the way in which I conducted my work so recently, I am glad in part that it happened, because through it, I have now been reminded of my purpose. I at last remember why I push myself to work harder, why I punish my body and force it to do as I will and not what it wills. And in the realization of this purpose, I stand ready to make justice out of injustice and fair beauty out of mangled atrocity.
This was very good. His realization that what he did was wrong though, seemed a little incpmlete. I mean witholding tax was certainly wrong, but what bout that part where they took more than they were suppose to. All he did was take it back, ok technically that was theft, but c'mon I'd be pretty pissed at that too.
Good Princess Cadance looked out on the feast of Stephen
when the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even.
Brightly shone the moon that night, though the frost was cruel,
when a pony came in sight, gath'ring winter fuel.
3294818 Someone has to continue this. I am not that someone.
I am however the someone that will say this is one of the best, most insightful second-person stories ever written. I'm going to read your other one now and see how it measures up.
This story is absolutely fantastic, but, I'd like to see a story where a human starts off all joking, cheerful and trusting and, over time, devolves into a bitter, cold-hearted shadow of what he once was. I know there was a story like that somewhere, but I can't seem to find it.
Either way, 10/10
Beautiful. Great work.
3294618
This. Also, doesn't banishment seem like a harsh punishment for non violent "theft", especially in a sugar coated universe like this? Point is, it seems very odd and unsatisfying how he suddenly drops all anger and accepts all the blame, given the context.
No Rape?!
No Butthurt comment wars?!
No eating (unglazed
)Alcorn foals!?
well there goes my day
Guess who's gonna fave and like this??
We'll I was going to have to say the story was decent. But then I noticed the story was in 2nd person which is difficult and less recognized so props to you.
3297021 That's a good point actually, banishment does seem a bit harsh. Also they kinda publisized his banishment so no-one in the Crystal Empire would give him a job. I'm not sure it was explicitly stated that he was non-violent in his theft, but no violence was implied either. Overall it was very harsh and I kept hoping that Cadence would express some disappointment in her Aunts' treatment of him.
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
Nice use of the 2nd person POV, not many authors use it to tell stories... At least from what I've seen.
On another note; The Feels are too much!
3298766 3297021
I could make a long apology (legal defense) for my work here, but I'm simply going to state my undefended assertions, and leave you both to consider them.
1. Equestria is astoundingly similar to a Platonic republic, but that does not mean that either it or the universe in which it exists is "sugar-coated." The show has referred to and even displayed hostile military action against and by Equestria on numerous occasions. Yet moreover, the range of threats against the country are greater than we see here on earth. And finally, as I showed here, the Canterlot nobility are some of the worst elitists I've ever seen depicted.
2. This character didn't just commit non-violent theft. He stole from this princesses' royal treasury. The princesses are by all means god-queens at least in the political sense of the title. Stealing from them should warrant execution, and trying to thwart their purposes in enacting justice should have warranted further. I'd say this character got off easy, because the news of his exile wasn't intentionally spread. It was just an unfortunate byproduct of his punishment.
3299748 I see your point and I'm certainly not questioning how a guy could end up with his attitude. You're right in saying the Canterlot Elite are pricks, but I can't fair Celestia acting so harshly. Other than that point, I enjoyed this story, bit hard to follow at times but good.
The use of Second person was amazing. I have actually never read a story in second person before and it seemed kinda different but cool. The feels were great as I thought about every perspective on the situation.
The story was a little hard to follow as it is YOUR train of thought and not mine but 'twas a great story nonetheless.
Keep up the awesome work!
Sincerely,
Soulyman
The debate and conversion in the second half of this story is disappointing. Cadence's arguments are not very convincing. I find myself with lots of valid responses to her statements, yet rather than even trying to respond, the protagonist simply crumbles before weak arguments and concludes that she's right. It's an unsatisfying conclusion.
Like soulyman points out, the story presents his train of thought as being the reader's train of thought...and I just have a difficult time imagining being so weak minded and unable to give any responses to Cadence's statements. The protagonist either isn't trying very hard, or isn't smart enough to put up much of an argument. That diminishes the weight of Cadence convincing him.
3304010
Maybe the protagonist isn't as weak minded as you think. Maybe Cadance was using her magic to make him love her. Maybe the whole thing was a publicity stunt to quell others like the protagonist. Think on that.
Am I the only one reminded of the Charlie Chaplin "Greatest Speech Ever Made" speech?
No? Just me?
Nice fic, it really captures Cadence's kindness.
3319637
I may have been inspired by that piece as well when writing Cadence's backstory speech.
I would have crushed Cadence. She's working from an assumed position, that being that self-interest doesn't happen.
But if no Doctor got paid, and got the prestige, would they still practice medicine? Would they still practice if they got the same wages as some school-aged pony washing dishes?
What legal recourse can the ponies get from abusive rulers? She may not get any more money from good laws, but bad laws wont end with her saying 'hello' to Mr Guillotine's finest efforts either.
It was nice to see someone write her as something other than annoyingly bubbly. And actually have more than two brain cells huddled together for warmth.
I did like this story, I'm just feeling extra grumpy today.
So feel free to skip this comment.
Sorry.
3319654
I knew that there was a familiar feel there!
Loved your fic!
I don't mean to pimp a thread that I just made, but here is a compilation of kindness that inspires more kindness.
I hope that helps with similar one shots in the future.
3347246 3304010
As it appears to me, there are two types of people who read this story, which come to my attention. There are those who read this story as I intended and thus generally enjoy the story (though there certainly are exceptions. My work is not perfect), and there are those who read the story in a way that I did not intend. For the latter category, it appears to me that the whole of these are dissatisfied. Therefore, let me respond to this issue by clarifying my purpose.
First and foremost, let me clarify what this story is not. This story is not a treatise on political philosophy or ethics. I did not write this with the intention to exhort people to practice more faith in the intentions of government. Yet, as I have admitted, the bulk of the dialectic argument presented in this story by Cadence is taken not from my opinions but from those of Plato and his Republic. I am certainly aware that the reader might find one or several of the premises in the argument questionable, and through this, find the conclusions to be unsatisfying or lacking; however, I never intended to formulate some great indisputable proof for the conclusions here, nor do I even expect many readers at all to be completely swayed by the logic herein. I read Book I of The Republic, from which this argument is taken, and I myself was not entirely convinced. Therefore, although I would very much like to engage in a debate/dialogue on this subject of political philosophy, I will not offer any reply to any counterargument which is presented against Plato’s logic here.
Having established what my story is not, let me now explain my intentions and the theme of the story. My purposes for writing this story were twofold, but before one can understand them, they should consider that this is a part of a series of stories, each of which holds a similar set of goals. Like these other stories, I wrote this one in the second, person perspective in the present tense. This is wholly different from how a treatise or formal argument would be written, as they generally hold a third person, omnipotent perspective, and their verbs usually are conjugated in the past tense. In the use of this form, the writer assumes a position of absolute authority, because one cannot argue the feelings of a character external to themselves. But rather than try to assume absolute authority, I wrote this story with the intention to encourage readers to place themselves into a mindset, with which they were not familiar. Indeed, this is how I wish everyone would read every kind of story.
A good story is written in such a way that encourages the reader to project themself onto the main protagonist. That is to say that the reader imagines himself acting as the protagonist. The reader should place themself in the position and circumstances of the protagonist and ask, “What would I do in this situation?” Now inevitably and inescapably, there will always be a majority of people who would react differently if they were placed in these circumstances. Yet this is no reason to abandon this manner of reading altogether. Rather, it is indeed the very reason and the very purpose for why we should do this in the first place. In the comparison of our decisions that we would make and the decisions which the protagonist actually make, the reader can make two important discoveries.
The first of these is greater insight into themself. If the reader finds that they would react differently, they should ask, “Why would I react this way in this situation?” In the answering of this question, the reader likely will gain great insight into their thought process and thus gain a greater understanding of themself. But more important than this discovery is the second one. The answer to this question of why they would react differently will yield insight into their thoughts process, yet it will also yield insight into the thought process of the protagonist. It can be safely said that if one understands the thought process of themself and the protagonist, then they will certainly come closer to understanding the deeper meaning of any story, if they do not already see it through this process. The reader is forced to ask, “Why does the protagonist behave in this way?” The answer will likely be found in the story’s theme. Therefore, I never intended the story at all to be so immersive, that the reader would completely imagine himself as the main character; for if they totally and completely agreed with this outlandish and strange viewpoint, then all the value of the story would be lost. The reader would simply have wasted their time. In fact, I wrote this story with the both the hopes that, firstly, people would disagree with the main character and perhaps become annoyed by his acquiescence that they might contrast themself and gain greater insight. Secondly, I hoped that the discovery of the reason for the main character’s decisions might lead the reader to the main theme of the story.
This brings me to my second goal, and it is only through the accomplishment of the first goal that the reader will be able to grasp this second one. As I said, like the others, this is a second person story, written with the intention to encourage the reader to project himself onto the main protagonist. Yet unlike the other stories, this story features Princess Cadence. Thus, it should be clear that this story is, at its core, a character analysis. If one reads the story with the method I prescribed above, they will realize two things. Firstly, the main character, despite the firmness of his belief in his position, crumbles easily to Cadence’s arguments; and secondly, this owes partly to the fact that Cadence leaves little room for him not to. Her entire argument is composed of questions, which can be answered with little more than a “yes” or “no.” She does not simply convince the protagonist to accept her viewpoint. She imposes it on him; she leaves him no other option short of admitting to unreasonability (a truly unacceptable position). At no point does she leave any room for a counterargument. Now this is not to say that her argument is without fault simply because of its structure. Again the discovery of the absolute truth is not my aim here. What is important is that Cadence has the ability to impose her viewpoints on her subjects through what seems to her subjects as an indisputable truth.
Cadence is after all a princess, and she would hence be trained in rhetoric. We also know that she was a foalsitter at a time. Both of these jobs, princess and foalsitter require a great deal of ability in motivating people as well as exhorting them to behave. And in both of these jobs, in order to enact this ability, one must often be able to do so in such a way that the one being exhorted does not feel like he is being forced but rather they are making the decision on their own. Therefore, it should be clear to the reader that Cadence is an experienced expert in social engineering.
Now this term is often thrown around a great deal with a generally negative connotation. By my calling Cadence a social engineer, some readers might start to think that I am saying Cadence is a manipulative deceiver. However, this is not my intention either. Actually, from the study of computer science and similar fields in which social engineering is a commonly used term, we can find that the practice is not inherently immoral. In fact, social engineering, like any other skill, is amoral; it depends on how you use it. Hence, when we look at this ability of Cadence, I think it is insufficient to tie any moral value on her just yet. Let us consider also her other attributes before making a judgment.
I hoped that in the enacting of this ability, Cadence should make the reader (who should now be projecting themself onto the protagonist) to feel childlike. Rather than facing him like a debater against a debater, she holds him at her side, and indeed under her wing where the protagonist is enjoying her comforting warmth. When he is obstinate to comply, she patiently coaxes him, and when he becomes angry, she smiles and waits until he calms down. Overall, it should seem that she is very condescending. Yet there also should be a feeling of care emanating from her. As a social engineer, she imposes arguments on him that may even be fallacious, but nonetheless, she is able to bring him to a position that seems favorable for both of them because he wants to. She does this in a friendly and loving manner, just as if she were foalsitting Twilight. That is how she rules as a princess.
At the very last, I understand that this idea can be unsettling in ways. If you as a subject of hers are drawn into her manner of thinking by these arguments, then you are trusting in her, and believing that she is inherently good. Now in our present system of government (I am speaking to my fellow Americans), I think that this is probably a very foolish idea. One cannot trust in the goodness of a politician. That is why Americans claim that they are a democratic republic and not simply a republic. However, it is important to realize that the Equestrian government is wholly different, and indeed it is a remarkably similar one to that of Plato’s ideal, utopian state, in which the people entrust the government to their leaders, and even grant them the astounding privilege of lying. As Plato wrote, “The rulers of the state are the only persons who ought to have the privilege of lying, either at home or abroad; they may be allowed to lie for the good of the state.” The people trust that their leaders are inherently good. Finally, I once again do not intend to try answering this question of whether the Equestrian princesses can be trusted. I merely intend to make this clear. I leave that up to the reader to decide for themself. Yet I will also say that if one assumes that this Platonic system of government is in place, when is drawn to the fact that the princesses are like the philosopher-kings of The Republic, who rule with wisdom and goodness, looking out for the people with disregard to themselves.
Fucking Celestia though.
I really wanted to see this guy just say "point me to the next kingdom and I'll be on my way"