• Member Since 14th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen Mar 22nd, 2023

Yosh-E-O


I am aspiring author who enjoys writing various works of fantasy in which have a cutesy touch

Sequels1

  • MThe Most Delightful Shade of Red
    After a most intimate evening with Spike, Rarity can't seem to get the image of his cute, little, chubby rump cheeks out of her head. This eventually brings her to come up with a clever way of enjoying yet another intimate experience with Spike
    Yosh-E-O · 2.3k words  ·  66  26 · 3.6k views
Comments ( 59 )

Bad. This is paced pretty terribly, there's no build up or substance to anything. I wouldn't consider this a clopfic- hell, it'd pass for a teen with the sex tag. The reasoning could do with a little more. If you wanted to write a clopfic, it needs more substance to it. Sorry if that seemed harsh, but even I, who is not one for clopfics, felt no uncomfortableness or arousal reading this. Rarity cleans Spike's dick- so what? You didn't even say "penis" "dick" or "cock" at all. It almost seemed as if you were afraid to.

Again sorry if this seems harsh, but this is my opinion.

3272206

STFU. :flutterrage: This story was awesome. It made me laugh. I thought the story was paced beautifully, compared to some of the other garbage clopfics that I've read. This earns five mustaches and an applause.
:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

3272311 Not sure if trolling... or not...

3272206

*Nods* I shall make an edit to my "Author's Note" as, based on what I knew, I believed this would be considered a "Clop Fic". Even the administration asked I switch it to "Adult", so I felt I should label it as it would likely be labelled.

And you're right. I did cower at using stronger language with respect to Spike and his member. Mature content is territory I'm fairly new to, but I thought I'd try it to see how well I could pull it off. Your comment shows I need more practice to properly enter this arena.

Thanks for your time and comment. Should I do a work like this again, I'll certainly take what you've mentioned in mind to ensure I do a better job. :trollestia:

Thanks for your thoughts and time!

3272311

Thank you for your compliment. It means a lot. Especially as I am really new to writing more mature content.

My overall hope was to make a story that wasn't all about the sexual element. The fact you got a laugh out of it makes me very happy. :rainbowlaugh:

3272364
Thank you for your feedback. It's comments like yours that allow me to genuinely improve as a writer and go beyond my comfort zone of writing stories better suited to younger audiences.

In submitting this piece, I felt it would be considered a "Clop Fic", so I threw it out there so anyone who saw it would know what they may be getting into. It would seem it falls short of that, and I will remove the notice.

I enjoyed writing about a sleepy Spike. Thought it would be a fun way to pull off this tale. I'll just have to work harder to ensure my quality is higher in future works of more mature nature. :twistnerd:

3272435

Nah, I'm totally for realz. I wouldn't fake enjoyment of a story. :pinkiehappy:

you really like spike huh?:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:
theres a few pics for ya!

3272532

Thanks! :rainbowlaugh: And, yes, Spike is my favorite character in the show. As such, I figured I'd try my hand at writing a variety of "Spike-Centric" stories.

I'm most pleased with my "Celestia's Chosen". However, it is very much written within my comfort zone of doing works more geared towards younger readers. This, on the other hand, was an embark to see if I could "Spike Things Up", so-to-speak.

Have an awesome day!

3272565

Thank you so much! :pinkiehappy: Writing has been a passion of mine for as long as I can remember. My best work is those in which are geared for readers 4 to 12. Though, it is scary to not try different things and, as such, I tried this. :derpyderp1:

What I find amusing, and posting these stories has proven it, is how hard it is to get folks to read stories that are actually meant for the target audience of the show. My first post "Celestia's Chosen", is very tame and takes an approach of how Celestia raised Spike and my OC, Yosh, while there being other ponies who had dragon companions doing their own, special missions for the princess. This work got very little feedback in comparison to my previous work, "Spike's Little Dragon" where Spike inquires Twilight about what it is to be a boy, and this work that is, well, mature content.

I have a children's series I've been trying to get off the ground for many years now, but haven't had a whole lot of luck. Though, like in writing this story, I'm going to keep on trying!

Have a great day! Thanks so much for your time and comments.

3272206 There may not have been much, if anything, to it, but I wouldn't say it was terrible. Very little happens aside from one of Spike's fantasies coming true while Rarity demonstrates her Element, but I felt that was enough to appreciate. Besides, Butterscotch Sundae never typed any specific synonyms for genitalia either.

Hey iv taken a copy of this for a review if you would like to see what I think heres a link
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Slash-wing-my-little-pony-FIM/339895572794546?ref=hl

3272791

Thank you! Your review means more than you probably could ever know. This is because, for me, I typically prefer to write works about "Friendship" and "Bonding". However, in this instance, I wanted to experiment to see what would happen if I wrote a tale that was more geared to the "Mature" element.

Needless to say, I got the results I expected. That being I got 100x more reads than I would've for my more "Target Audience Friendly" work.

I'm probably not going to write anymore stories like this. But, in writing it and hearing your review, you have helped me know where my true passion lies and that, even if I don't get a lot of reads, comments, etc. for it, I must follow it.

Be well and, again, thank you!

Yo
what duh hellia going on tuhday. This is some freaky shit mudda bitch :rainbowhuh:

so far, it wasn't supposed to be paced very well, it was only a single scenario where Rarity was taking advantage of a situation where Spike could not remember or would mistake for a dream... it's like when you're curious about doing something and when you get the opportunity, you do as much as you can when you know nobody's going to find out...

whether or not it will be a good fic willd depend on what the author does in the next chapter

3273965
I know. And, for that reason, I am likely not going to write such material again. :facehoof:

This work was sort of an experiment to see how well I could do a mature-themed story. Particularly to see just how many views, comments, and favorites I could get compared to my natural writing expertise of material more geared towards the actual, target audience of "MLP: FiM".

Needless to say, I got many times more views, faves, and comments for this compared to my tamer efforts. However, through analyzing the comments, it isn't a path I am meant to follow. So, with your comment, I am more assured that I am best suited for writing work for the "4 to 8" crowd and "Tweens".

Thank you kindly for your comment and for reading the story. :scootangel:

3274713

Actually, there isn't going to be a "Next Chapter". This is it. :scootangel:

The closest thing to additional pieces that relate to this work, and they are far tamer, is that I'd have it play out amidst my "Celestia's Chosen" series. That, I eventually do plan to add to. Though, not until I get the right inspiration to move it onto what would be considered "Season 2". :pinkiehappy:

3275001

In canon, I do believe that would likely be Rarity's true reaction. :rainbowlaugh:

As you probably could guess, I took a number of creative liberties to play on a few of Rarity's comments in regard to Spike in "Dragon Quest".

Thanks for your thoughts! They are much appreciated. :raritywink:

It's very rare I come across a clop-fic that is tasteful, but this is definitely such a clopfic. The description and level of detail is perfectly fitting for our viewpoint character of Rarity. It leaves me wanting more, while at the same time making sense to stop where you do. Most of all, the story is just sweet and adorable.

10/10, would recommend to friends! :pinkiehappy:

3305880

Thank you so very much for taking the time to read and remark on this experimental work. I wanted to see if I could do a "Mature" piece. However, at the same time, I wanted it to be "Innocent" so that it didn't corrupt the characters.

As an aspiring, children's author, this was not an easy project to do. I am glad I did, though, for you have to get out of your "Comfort Zone" every now-and-then in order to get more critiques and a stronger understanding of your strengths and weaknesses.

So far, this work has done well to aid me in my creative direction. Your remarks only further assist me in knowing where my talents are while, at the same time, encouraging me to perhaps try a work like this again sometime. :pinkiehappy:

May you have a great day! Again, thanks for your time and thoughts. :heart:

3306845 An aspiring children's author, eh? I can see it. From one aspiring writer to another, I wish you the best of luck! :moustache:

3306956

It's always nice to meet and share words with someone who truly appreciates the joys of writing. :twistnerd: I do hope your efforts here in "FiM Fiction" help you to also build upon your natural talent as you create, or continue to create, your own, one-of-a-kind works for all to appreciate. :scootangel:

The way I see it, for all us writers out there, ONE of us has to get noticed. :coolphoto: In the meantime, I hope you have fun doing what you like to do most with your work and never let page views, faves, or comments stop you from doing what you feel is right and makes you happiest as an author.

'Complete'

Oh, okay then. I thought this was building up to something.

3318508
I'm afraid not. Though, technically, it does fall within the story arc I've created within "Celestia's Chosen". :scootangel:

The whole point of the story was to create a situation where Rarity would actually do something for Spike. Kind of like a "First Time" / "Experiment" where it is all innocent with Spike not realizing what is going on while Rarity starts to realize that she just may actually have feelings for the little dragon who adores her so.

I'm sure there are other fics that go into much more detail. However, for the intent and purpose, I wanted to give the two a "First Time" and, in most firsts, neither party ever gets too into anything for there is just so much bashfulness and uncertainty.

Perhaps, as I do more FiM Fiction and develop "Celestia's Chosen", I'll create another encounter to see how well I can pull it off without getting too out-of-control.

Thanks for reading!

3350127>>3350127

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:
Yet again, what you displayed truly sums it all up. :pinkiehappy:

I'm a little uncomfortable with the situation set up here. Now, I'm generally one to give the benefit of the doubt that Spike is of a moral age of consent in any clopfics regarding him when its not explicitly portrayed otherwise even when taking place during the timeframe of the show since we don't really know what his specific chronological or developmental age is. However, in this situation, you've pretty much set up a situation in which he is being taken advantage of in a way that he is clearly unable to give full consent to what's really happening. It wouldn't even be so bad if she were just checking him out while bathing him, but going into the more intimate actions of actually licking his junk while he's completely out of it is basically what we'd refer to in the real world as sexual assault regardless of age. As much as I love Sparity, that really disturbs me.

3413045

Point taken and much appreciated. :scootangel:

I wasn't fully comfortable after posting this particular work either. However, what's done is done and it has been a great learning experience in what I am comfortable in writing and what I am not comfortable in writing.

The next part, "The Most Delightful Shade of Red" is, what I thought would be, "Toned Down". Though, I think it may still be a bit too much. As such, if I do another of these, I am going to try and get a better balance so that it isn't too "Creepy" or "Off-Putting".

Again, thanks for the thoughtful insight. :duck:

3480272
I'm glad you enjoyed the story. My goal was to write outside of my comfort zone and, for the most part, I did. :pinkiehappy:

I can definitely say that I've learned a lot here. Lots of people have very insightful things to say. Unfortunately, more people seem interested in dropping strong language than simply stating why they did not particular like the work. :fluttercry:

FiM Fiction may not be my strong point, but I may continue to do some for fun amidst my other efforts. Though, it won't be like this and I won't be posting it here. I've been sworn at enough times to know this is just not the place I should be.

3491931
It's not so much I "Took it to Heart" as I thought a site filled with Bronies would be far more friendly than what I've experienced. :fluttershyouch:

To cite an example, I have been a part of Fur Affinity for over 5 years. In all 5 years, and over 500+ posts, I have never "ONCE" had anyone use harsh language towards me as I have used my writing to learn about who I am and my place in this world.

Finding "FiM Fiction" a place to fall far below the expectations I had, I began to get a disliking towards the show. A show that has inspired me so much. So, rather than continue to be cursed at, I am simply continuing my work back on Fur Affinity and Deviant Art where people are more accepting of experimental works, works of self-discovery, and those of us who write about topics in which we ourselves don't completely understand why we like them.

I actually just finished another part in my "Spike Series" and posted it on FA. So, despite not being here, I'm still a FiM writer as I get the inspiration. :raritywink:

3494198
www.furaffinity.net/user/yosh-e-o

Interestingly enough, Fur Affinity is a really nice place if you are looking for acceptance for having a mental and/or physical disability. :derpyderp1:

I joined to see if "The Real Me" could be appreciated after I was belittled horribly by a past employer. I needed to find out if the person I really was could be loved and appreciated. I got that, and then some. :scootangel:

Once you pull away the "Fursona", you find a lot of people are just trying to find their place in the world. A world that, otherwise, doesn't understand nor wants to understand why they are who they are. So many folks there with various degrees of autism, disability, and sexual desires ranging from "Pansexual" to "Homosexual".

Did you know "BronyCon" advertised there last year? Bronies and Furries have a lot more in common than either side wants to believe. We all just want to "Feel a Part of Something".

not bad, not bad

3960509
Thank you kindly for having taken the time to read and remark on this story.

This was an "Experiment" to see how well I could do a more mature piece of work. It's not my strong point, but I am proud of trying and glad you thought it was good. :duck:

3961487 your velcome and I a going to write a war romance soon titled Stahl Rosen

4050704
That is a really, awesome avatar you have. Very nice.

Is this the only story on this site that gives Spike's adorable backside the attention it deserves:fluttercry:?

4534059
<LoL!> I'm not sure. Though I did like trying to make a little series of stories based on all the comments Rarity gave Spike during "Dragon Quest". :scootangel:

No secret is ever lost, Pinkie get some cake,:pinkiehappy: Fluttershy you're best mare:fluttershysad: &. AJ get your scatter gun were having a wedding :ajsleepy:Twilight growled.:facehoof:

4892882
Now that there is a most interesting series of statements. Good visuals with few words. My compliments on a fine follow-up or stand alone story. :twistnerd::duck:

Hints through out the show tell more,
:ajsmug:" Woah, Thair lover boy!"
:raritywink:"You're my hero"
:pinkiehappy: "FOREVER"
:facehoof: "Everpony knows that"
:rainbowlaugh: "HA HA HA HA HA HA"
:fluttershyouch: " Oh Ah If that's OK"
:moustache: "Pony Joe, More sprinkles!"
Interesting Easter eggs all over.:trollestia:

4894699
Yet another outstanding way to illustrate key points from within the show.

You are quite skilled in making statements with emoticons. I'm impressed and happy that you took the time to share thse insights with me.

It's nice to see the "good" guy win in the end, So to speak:rainbowlaugh:

So in other words, she grants his wildest dreams, and then makes him believe it was a dream and that he still has no chance with her.:ajbemused: "True love" my ass.

5694742
I was amidst trying out some ideas when I wrote this story. This was but the first with "The Most Delightful Shade of Red" being the follow-up then a more serious take on Sparity with "The Cave of Forbidden Love" and "Love's True Form".

I wasn't very happy with the overall presentation of this work. However I do keep them around as reminders of trying to go outside of my comfort zone of writing. Works like "Shining Cadence", "Meet Beanie Bon", and "Maternal Bonds of Eternal Friendship" are more my style.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. :)

Thanks for reading and for your thoughts.

I will be honest, yes this particular fic is naughty, but in and of itself it is not a clop fic. There was no climax to the story, in either sense of the word. In this case, even if you had just made her get him off with her mouth would have qualified as a clop fic. However this just is something that may be rated R in theaters but isn't exactly any kind of sex.

Just calling it like I see it. but never the less it is a good fic, I plan on reading the next part very soon

6375397
This one was a VERY experimental story. I felt kind of bad after writing it, but refused to take it down since that would be denying that particular phase in my growth as a writer.

I've always felt Spike needs a sense of love, but I didn't want to quite "Cross the Line". So I created this one in a way that, if it were real, Spike wouldn't likely remember it. It'd likely be remembered more like a hazy dream than Rarity taking some time to admire Spike in other ways.

5694742 And she never actually gave him release. Which is really frustrating for a guy.

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