• Member Since 21st Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen 6 hours ago

Darth Atrox


I find your lack of faith disturbing

T

The ponies have had many good times with their new friend, Xeno. He's charming, funny, kind and a general pleasure to be around.

But he isn't a pony.

Xeno calls himself a Human. Only, not really a human.

He claims to be an immortal, to be thousands of years old. He also claims to have one goal in life.

He wants to die.

Inspired by (Re)Birth Through Fire by spacecowboy

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 23 )

Editing note: You have a number of word constructs along these lines:

"What does that mean?" Asked Pinkie Pie.
"It means that me, this Xeno, will be gone forever when I regenerate." He said.

This has been split into two sentences. The correct format is a single sentence, as follows:

"What does that mean?" asked Pinkie Pie.
"It means that me, this Xeno, will be gone forever when I regenerate," he said.

(You also may want to consider using words which are not "asked", as this has been repeated for multiple questions.)

Love it I love the spin you've taken and love your character keep up the good work

Huh well this is going to probably be an emotional story right at the end of every regeneration it has good premise so I'll definitely follow it. Hope to see more soon :) Upvote

Haha! This looks good...:pinkiehappy:

Comment posted by Hex217 deleted Sep 26th, 2013

looks good so far.

and, lets face it, every guy have wondered what it would be like to have boobs for a day.:rainbowlaugh:

3260369 one I love your profile pic and two I could not agree more!

He may not be a time lord, but he sounds almost exactly like one. Especially with the 'I don't want to go' line.

3263001

If you were about to regenerate, and everything that made you you was going to die forever, wouldn't you say the same thing?

Would you be willing to live forever, if every several years/decades you had to die and someone else with your memories would replace you?

Why not? It's not like you lose anything, you're going to die anyway. At least when you regenerate, even if you take the view that 'you' are fully dead, it also creates a new life, rather than just a corpse.

timelord obviously

Wait... has this chapter been written already? I mean I read this awhile ago word for word pretty much.
I'm excited for this story as its definitely different and very sad at the beginning, but yeah I thought this was a new chapter. *Sorry if I sound rude.*

As for Xeno I find it disheartening that this girl refers to the past Xeno as simply a dead man.

I can't help but compare her to the Doctor.

The doctor has lived for over a millennium, yet he remember who he once was, sure he's a completely new person with new personality likes and dislikes but this person always refers to himself as being 'The Doctor.' The timelord who would prefer to help the universe even if the universe doesn't care.

Sure there were incarnations of this timelord who prefered not to remember past friends and loved ones. But he always carried on and didn't forget who he initially was.

Where as this Xeno effectively makes herself her own person, treating the moments of her past as nothing more then fleeting moments of a life she never had.

What happens when she dies? Would she want her future self to remember anything she ever done? Or would the future self treat the current incarnation as nothing but 'the fleeting moments of a now dead woman?'

The scariest thing I would have to think for anyone who reincarnates in this way would be the fact that one day you wont be you anymore. Like breathe on a mirror Everything that makes you, you. Will be gone. Replaced by another person with new likes, personality ect ect. But they have your memories the life you currently hold sometimes even your friends.

What was the male Xeno's last thoughts to himself?

What did he tell his future self in his mind, his last wish to that person?

"We all change when you think about it, we're all different people all through our lives and thats ok, thats good you gotta keep moving forward, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be, I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear... I will always remember when the Doctor was me."

The Eleventh Doctor

I know for fact already that both these individuals Xeno and the Doctor are very different people.

The fact Xeno wishes to die is pretty much the opposite of the Doctor I think and sets this Xeno as a different character without it feeling like a copy character.

Just sad that this Xeno wishes nothing more then to forget the person they used to be.

Wow I rambled quite a bit I'm not hating this story or anything like that, the fact that this story has me thinking so much on it is a good thing as it makes me invested on this potentially great story.

I really hope you continue writing this as I'm excited for whats next.

Why is he a woman now?

I thought you had to stay the same gender.

It makes the story feel...

Off putting having the MC switching like that.

Other than that, good concept and nice story.

I'll be watching.

:trixieshiftleft: -sighs- Continue, thou hath intrigued me :pinkiesmile: :pinkiehappy:

Comment posted by thisistheusernameichose deleted Jan 13th, 2015

I am liking the way a story with this curse can go. It is a refreshing take on things. However the definition if immortal is the inability to die. Eternal life.
Xeno is not immortal

That being said keep up the great work. Though you will need a name for this random oc generator with memory transfer power xeno has. I still think it is like a Phoenix. So why not call it Phoenix power or something similar. Since a Phoenix is a mythical creature that is not known to be able to speak whose to say that this isn't the same. Xeno dies and a new creature with xenos memories is born from the ashes.

3826578 not really, just think the character to be like a timelord. Just without the tardis, knowledge and so on. The master changed gender, to be honest I thought and still think that was a bad move. It felt like they only changed it becuase of demand or fear of being branded sexist or something. Instead of doing it for the story.

I don't care if a character is changed, wether it be gender, characteristics and so on. Just as long its for the STORY and it IMPROVES it.

Stop this On Hiatus Madness and continue this story! It's been Four Years!

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