• Published 8th Oct 2013
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The Speechless Spartan in Equestria - marking



Stories revolving around an unidentified odd Spartan of the UNSC in Equestria.

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The Second Coming pt.1

The Second Coming pt.1

The Spartan woke up groggily from his sleep sometime around 1 am if his computer’s clock was anything to go by. The Spartan was about to stand up before his eyes settled on something else inside his HUD. According to his proximity scanner something else was in the room, something that hadn’t taken the time to make its presence known. This something would be regretting its position and poor decisions very soon.

In one swift motion the Spartan rolled out of his bed to evade whatever had been on top of him from simply diving on him. As he stopped he grabbed a small yet sturdy dresser and flung it like a projectile at his uninvited guest. He merely heard a scream before the dresser collided with the roof leaving a sizeable hole as it fell to the ground afterwards. The Spartan moved to inspect the rubble in search for his attacker before he noticed certain dot in his sensors move behind him. The door flung open and a black shade flew out with an impressive speed. But it wouldn’t help him/her, not for long anyway. The hunt had just begun.

As the Spartan stepped out of the room he looked at the shade flying away before adding a marker to it just like he did to Blueblood that one time. The difference though was that this intruder had an obvious set of skills it would no doubt use to get away. It was quite fast and silent so it would be difficult to catch it were aware of the Spartan’s presence.

Having decided to use the opportunity to train with a simple snatch and grab the Spartan went off. The intruder had seemingly gone up to the whole other end of the castle and with quick and precise movements in order to evade his pursuer. The Spartan had a somewhat vicious reputation already running over the whole castle as well as some rumors running around in the city of Canterlot. The rumors talked about the Princesses trying to harness the power of a being far more powerful than themselves but failing to do so. The demon was enormous in size and would tower over Princess Celestia herself! It walked on two partially deformed legs and used its claws to crawl over walls and pillars. If you looked into its single golden eye you would see yourself living your worst nightmare only in time for the monster to end it by ripping you to shreds. And finally, if you were somehow crazy enough to attack it, you would find yourself unable to get past its magical ward that protected its chitin exterior.

This only gave the intruder more than enough motivation to escape and search for help. His contractors had told him his mission would be to watch over this walking mountain and he had barely tried to sneak into its room to get a good look at him when it woke up as if sensing his presence. If the dresser he threw at him was anything to go by, the beast would no doubt rip off his limbs. The intruder had his objective in mind as he went inside of a guest room where it promptly hid inside a closet room.

The intruder gasped for air as the sweat he built up from the escape fell down his face.

“I *gasp* I think I lost *gasp* him,” the intruder whispered before an errant drop of sweat fell into his eye.

“Argh! Damn this thing stings!” the intruder said through gritted teeth as he used his hoof to rub his eye before a small tap on his back brought his attention to a small towel being offered to him.

“Thank you.” The intruder said with a smile as he took it without notice and took to cleaning the sweat off.

It was during this time that the intruder’s head shot up in the air as his eyes fell into its sockets. The intruder slowly turned behind him and was relieved to find nothing but darkness. He sighed and turned around but found himself wondering why he was now looking at himself at a golden mirror. The reason finally dawned on him before he screamed like a little filly as a metallic arm grabbed him by the throat and lifted him up from the ground.

The Spartan came out of the closet and into the light as the intruder kicked and struggled under his grasp. Once there the Spartan could see the intruder to be a pony, or at least to a certain aspect.

Hmm, I haven’t seen this model before,’ the Spartan thought as he inspected the Thestral most commonly known as batpony in a rather embarrassing manner.

The batpony had leathery wings and fangs as well as somewhat different ears, but what really took the cake was the dark blue/silver armor it wore. This was a guard without a doubt, but why hadn’t the Spartan encountered them before?

With that in mind the Spartan took the squirming pony and placed it under his arm as he began to roam around the halls. The batpony seemed relentless at trying to escape but thankfully it didn’t seem to be as soft as the other guards the Spartan had encountered in the past. This one seemed to think it could get away by putting up enough of a fight. The Spartan didn’t know if he should respect this or just plain feel insulted, one thing was sure though, it beat having the pony crapping himself.

As he travelled down the halls in search for Miss Moonbutt he suddenly came to the realization that he didn’t quite know where the room for the alicorn of the night was. He knew Celestia’s room well; after all he had not only made to wait there while trapped in a crystal cocoon for various hours but also had been thrown out of the room. Not once though had the Spartan visited Luna’s quarters but he assumed that if Celestia’s room was in a tower, Luna’s might also be on one. Which one though?

It took the Spartan 2 hours to find the damn room, as he found himself visiting various new places like an observatory, a game room, a strange place with a an examination table and a whip he rather not know what it’s used for, and a simple attic. Luna’s room was oddly absent of any sort of surveillance of any kind as the Spartan simply entered without problem at all. By this time the batpony the Spartan carried was unconscious as the Spartan had knocked him out cold when he grew tired of his squirming. He simply tossed the pony on the bed as he searched for the pony. She was oddly enough absent from her room, yet she wasn’t in the throne room either when the Spartan checked.

To be sincere the Spartan was only there because the pony seemed to be more in her department than the golden polly pocket ones that loved meeting their doom at his hands every other day. He expected an explanation behind the intrusion of his bed chambers and also how he somehow ended there when he clearly was having breakfast before everything went black.

He waited a small while in the hope she would come in through the door any second before he grabbed the pony from the tail and dragged him off the bed. If she wasn’t available he would go and hassle Celestia next. As he grabbed the handle of the doors the balcony doors opened swiftly as a certain dark alicorn strolled somewhat clumsily and dancing to some sort of tune.

“Whew! That unicorn sure knows how to play music! And to think this is what ponies now do during my night. I can’t say I blame them though, it is quite fun,” Luna said as she reached to her neck and pulled off what seemed to be a green glowing neon necklace.

She tossed it off without care as it landed directly on top of the Spartan’s head, catching the attention of the Princess as she looked at him like a deer in front of a car’s headlights.

“Please don’t tell Tia!” pleaded Luna as she took the whole situation in.

The Spartan couldn’t care less for the Princess ignoring her possibly very important duties to go and act questionably at nightclubs as he simply raised his arm and with it the pony that dangled from its tail.

“Black Mist!? What is going on? What happened to him!?” Luna said as she grabbed the guard in her magic and lifted him towards her as she inspected him.

Her horn glowed in intensity before a small spark passed from it and touched down on the guard’s head as he slowly regained consciousness.

“P-princess?” the guard asked as he began rubbing the back of his head.

“Black Mist, what happened to you?” Luna asked.

He was being stupid,’ the Spartan thought.

“I remember trying to get away from Silent Warrior before everything went black,” he said as the Princess looked to the Spartan with quite an angry expression. This was new.

“Why did you hurt my guard?” Luna asked dangerously.

The Spartan simply shrugged which prompted Luna to lay down the guard to the ground as she stepped towards the Spartan while glowing. And then it simply snuffed out as the Princess took a calming breath.

“Silent you can’t simply knock a pony out of the blue! This has been an issue for quite a while if Twilight’s letters and your past behavior is anything to go by,” Luna said as she turned to Black Mist, “I’m sorry for this Black Mist, you will be compensated later on. I will understand if you decide to go back on the deal we made.”

“No Princess, I gave you my word as a guard when I accepted this charge. And to be honest I think I might be responsible too. You see after I was assigned to the mission I thought it would be a good idea to see him and I guess I might have snuck into his room,” the guard said sheepishly at the Princess who now had an unamused expression.

“Oh Black Mist, did you not learn a thing about what my sister and I told you about Silent Warrior? As a matter of fact this is why you were charged with him. I hope this is a lesson to you,” the Princess reprimanded as she turned to the Spartan, “I hope you can forgive me Silent, as you can see I’m rather protective about my night guards.”

‘Huh, so you can simply not care when I break the bones of the day ones, but I knock out one of your night guards and all of the sudden you’re momma bear? Good to know. Also it would be good to know what the hell is going on,’ the Spartan thought as he crossed his arms and looked at the Princess.

“I guess it can’t be avoided to give you an explanation huh?” Luna said as she sighed, “Well if you must know I guess it would be good to clear your doubts before you go and break my sister’s sleep. Now that wouldn’t be a pretty sight, you thought she was mad after you punched her in the face? Disturb her sleep and you’ll find yourself a victim of the mysterious auto-combustion.”

The guard now known as Black Mist simply looked at both of them quizzically before turning to Luna, “Excuse me your highness, but did I just hear you right? That Silent really did punch Princess Celestia?” he asked

“Yes Black Mist, that is the reason why some of you where woken up yesterday morning as a fight between Silent and my sister broke out. And as a matter of fact that is why you are here,” she said now turning to the Spartan, “Silent, this here is Corporal Black Mist. He has been assigned to you when you return to Ponyville with Twilight Sparkle. As your destructive and downright psychopathic conduct seems to sprout problems everywhere my guard here will be in charge of making you aware of proper social etiquette. Twilight Sparkle has also made a set of rules you are to abide to in order for her to be comfortable with this, and after this is all over you will have your deserved freedom,” Luna explained.

Sure, because there’s really anything you could do to stop me from getting my freedom by force,’ the Spartan thought as he chuckled.

Almost as if she was reading his thoughts Luna replied, “We are aware that you might think yourself strong enough to evade our forces and obtain your freedom as such, but we must remind you that there is no place in Equestria where we won’t find you and nag you,” Luna said as the message struck the Spartan.

You play a hard game Luna, but I guess you make a point. I’ll bite,’ the Spartan thought as he saluted her.

“Well it’s good to know about your consent. You are dismissed Silent, Luna said as both he and the guard walked out of her room, “Oh! And one more thing! You uh, wouldn’t tell Celestia about where I was right?” Luna said as she giggled nervously.

The Spartan didn’t even gesture to her before he turned around and walked away with the guard in tow.

“Oh… right. My bad!” Luna yelled as she closed her bedroom doors.

I know I’m forgetting something,’ the Spartan thought as the guard trotted next to him.

“So you’re Silent Warrior huh?” the guard asked as the Spartan looked at him, “I gotta say, you are nothing like the rumors floating around describe you.”

The Spartan simply looked at the guard questioningly.

“Yeah I mean I expected to die when you caught me but I guess you aren’t so bad after all. I’m actually beginning to think that being your social conscience will be quite interesting,” Black Mist said.

‘I can still kill you. Keep acting like I’m your class pet project and you’ll find yourself inside a bag filled with rocks slowly sinking in a lake,’ the Spartan thought before he stopped dead in his tracks.

Fuck! I didn’t get how I woke up in my damn room!’ the Spartan thought as he placed his hand down his visor and simply walked back to his room. He would be getting the answers the next day possibly from Twilight. The guard didn’t leave his side and even went inside his room before the Spartan quite literally kicked him out. The guard was getting on his nerves already.


The next morning came far too quickly for the Spartan as he wasn’t even able to enjoy it. When he woke up he found that a certain batpony had somehow snuck into his room. Though impressive for him to catch the Spartan by surprise the winner in the end was him as he rolled the guard up in the bed sheets quite tightly and then placed him in the dirty clothes bin. It would take a while for him to get out he assumed.

The Spartan didn’t take long to make it into the dining room where he found Princess Luna sweating profusely under the gaze of her sister. Twilight seemed to be having a simple serving of pancakes as she had a lively chat with both Princess Cadance and Prince Shining Armor.

“Luna stop changing the subject and answer the question!” Celestia said rather irritably at her sister, “Where have you been going out to at night!?”

“I have no idea what you speak of Tia! Surely there must be a mistake,” she said as she looked away.

“Luna, I’ve been checking with the guards as well as the messengers and they have all reported you missing every third Thursday night of the month as well as not holding night court! Now tell me where you have been!” Celestia demanded.

“I know not what you speak of sister dearest!” Luna said, sweating bullets and backing away from her sister.

As the Spartan seemed to enter the room everything went silent and forgotten. Shining Armor immediately scowled, Cadance looked at him with curiosity, and Twilight waved at him before returning back to her pancakes.

Luna on the other end of the table looked absolutely relieved as she all but yelled at the Spartan, “SILENT! Good morning to you! It’s good to know you are up and ready to tackle another day, so how about you come and sit in this exact chair and we can go over what we discussed yesterday!” she said while pointing rather strongly to a spot between her and Celestia.

The Spartan merely shrugged at their dilemma before following suit and sitting beside Luna. The waiter didn’t wait long before he came to the Spartan with the menus and like the first time the Spartan simply chose one plate at random from the carnivore menu. He could last for a very long while without eating but he still needed to fill his food bases in order to keep himself at top performance.

Twilight, Cadance, and Shining Armor seemed to stop what they were doing immediately as they saw him choose from the meat menu. Twilight looked frightened while Cadance looked sick.

“So he eats meat too? Would anypony please explain to me again why we are allowing this monster to live with my sister? And give him the title of guard no less!?” Shining Armor exclaimed.

“Shining Armor eating meat is a perfectly natural thing to do. We shouldn’t discriminate beings that eat meat just because we find it strange or scary; it’s just part of the natural cycle of life. Also, do you not think of Silent Warrior a good guard after he was capable of blasting through the castle’s forces?” Princess Celestia asked.

“He sent innocent guards home broken! As well as placing the whole castle in a dangerous position as the number of guards on active roll are very small!” Shining replied.

“Which tells something of our current state of defense, we fear we will need to give the guards a harder training regime in order to be ready for such disasters or attacks. It is indeed sad that something like that happened but to grow we must learn from our mistakes. Besides we are going to send a special agent with Silent down to Ponyville to serve as a counselor of a sort. That way we can have the peace of mind that Ponyville won’t fall to ruins,” Luna said in his defense.

“Talking about returning to Ponyville,” Twilight intervened, “Have you told Silent about what we discussed yesterday during the time he was passed out?”

“Well he knows about Black Mist, but he is still in the dark about a few details,” Luna replied.

“I guess this would be a good time as ever,” Twilight said as she addressed the Spartan, “Silent I have to tell you that I don’t feel entirely comfortable with the prospect of you returning to Ponyville with me but I have agreed to it as long as you follow a simple list of conditions I have made up. Are we clear?” she asked.

“Yes,” the Spartan said.

“Good, I’ll be giving you the list later on so you can sign it in accordance. And after that we can leave is that okay with you?” she asked.

The Spartan nodded and all was good in the world. They ate their lunch in peace before getting ready and the Spartan signed some sort of conditions list that seemed to go on forever and he would most likely ignore the moment they become too much of a hassle.

The Spartan and Twilight stood side by side near the royal chariot as the Princesses and Prince awaited their departure.

“Thank you for having me Princesses, I can’t express how nostalgic it was to be in the castle again,” Twilight said.

“Remember Twilight, we are always hear for you. And if you ever need us, we are only a dragon’s fire letter away,” Celestia said.

“Don’t forget to write to us in the Crystal Empire Twily, it gets lonely sometimes up there in the frozen north,” Shining Armor said as both siblings nuzzled.

The Spartan stood firmly on the back trying not to gag at the sappy moments these ponies were having. He could almost remember his moments as a simple recruit; there was no mercy for no one. And the last time he saw his drill instructor, the only person he could look up to as a father, he got kicked out of the aircraft for stalling the line. That was a good day.

Twilight finally finished her goodbyes as she finally got into the carriage. The Spartan couldn’t believe he got coerced into getting inside that flying blasphemy of an aircraft. He barely stepped into the chariot before the doors to of the castle burst open as a rather angry batpony stomped towards the Spartan.

Black Mist looked up at him, glaring daggers at him before he spoke, “DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK FOR THE MAIDS TO REALIZE I WAS IN THE LAUNDRY!? LET ME ANSWER FOR YOU! THEY DIDN’T! I WOKE UP AS I WAS THROWN INSIDE THE WASHING MACHINE! HAVE YOU EVER WOKEN UP LIKE THAT!?” he yelled.

The Spartan merely shrugged before he sat down inside the chariot before the night guard joined them and placed both his hooves in his face, “I think I’ve committed a huge mistake.”

“Oh well no backsies!” Celestia said before she ran to the front Pegasi, “Go now, do it, go go go!” she said before the Chariot left Canterlot in a rather hurriedly manner as Black Mist simply looked from its top with a dejected expression.

“The guard is going to die isn’t he?” Luna said with a blank stare.

“I give him a week,” Cadance said.

“I give him one day,” Shining Armor said.

“I don’t really care; they’re Ponyvilles’ problem now! Toodles,” Celestia said as she merrily trotted away, leaving the other three ponies looking at the chariot fly off and away. Ponyville had thought itself safe from the Spartan menace, but the nightmare had only begun.

Author's Note:

Next chapter coming shortly.
And like always, special thanks to Requiem17 for editing.