Our Girl Scootaloo 3 of 3

by Cozy Mark IV

Ch 3.7 Life the Universe and Strippers

Our Girl Scootaloo

Part 3 of 3

by Cozy Mark IV & Jan. McNeville

Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan-made work of prose. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the property of Hasbro. Please support the official release

Chapter Three point Seven: Life the Universe and Strippers

Scootaloo led Twilight into a room with a computer terminal and a larger projection screen taking up most the far wall. She powered up the computer, shut off the lights and closed the door on the now dimly lit room.

Twilight looked around the Spartan room in confusion –aside from what Scootaloo had called a 'desktop computer' and a couple of chairs and tables, the room was empty. “Um, I thought you were taking me to a library to study this world? They're no books in here, and even if there were, you turned out the lights.”

Scootaloo just smiled. “We are in a library... after a fashion. Remember how I showed you that a computer can store pages of text?” Twilight nodded. “Well on this world most of the computers are linked to each other through something called the internet. That means that almost any page of text, any book, any movie, any photo, even whole programs that are stored on computers all over the world can be accessed from any other computer hooked up to the internet.”

Twilight still looked skeptical. “Okay, but each computer can only hold, what, a couple of pages? Even with the two or three thousand computers on this world, you would still need... Why are you laughing at me?”

Scootaloo put a hand over her mouth and coughed a couple of times. “Oh, you'll see. There are still libraries that store information as text in books, but you are a few orders of magnitude off in your estimates. How many books do you have in the ponyville library? Five or ten thousand?”

Twilight thought about it. “I'm not sure I have that many...” Before she could say more the projector kicked on and the entire wall lit up as a computer screen twenty feet on a side.

Scootaloo smiled at Twilight's gaping expression and pointed to the computer on the table. “That one computer is capable of storing all the books in your library, and at least 100 other libraries just like it, all by itself.”

Twilights jaw hung slack as Scootaloo continued. “And there aren't a few thousand computers in the world, there are billions of computers in this world.”

Twilight's gape became a look of consternation. “I don't know that word...”

Scootaloo stared for a moment, then pulled up a document to type in. “This is a hundred: 100. Here is a thousand 1,000. And ten thousand 10,000. One hundred thousand 100,000. One million 1,000,000. Ten million 10,000,000. One hundred million 100,000,000. One billion 1,000,000,000. Ten billion 10,000,000,000. And a good ballpark estimate of the number of internet capable computers in the world would be on the order of 100 billion, or 100,000,000,000.”

Twilight was shaking her head. “That's not possible! Every human would have to own a mountain of computers to come even close to that number!”

“Twilight, how many humans do you think there are on this plant?”

She thought about it, looked at the numbers that Scootaloo had entered, then revised her estimate upward. “Ten million?”

“Twilight, we have single cities with more people then that. This world is home to over nine billion humans.”

Twilight felt her knees go weak, and she sat down hard in one of the provided chairs. Seeing her reaction, Scootaloo tried changing the subject.

“Maybe we should start with a look at the world itself.” The wall changed, and a spinning globe came into view against a black background of stars. As Twilight watched, the picture zoomed in and in and in until her mind reeled at the scale of it. Eventually, the picture came to rest on a big building that looked oddly familiar.

“This is the hospital we are in now. We are in a room in this wing here,” She pointed with a white arrow on the screen. “and you can see the cars in the parking lot over here.”

The cars were tiny, but Twilight did recognize them from the drive in. “Is there a way I could look around with that?” She asked a little shakily. Scootaloo nodded and indicated the mouse on the desk in front of Twilight. “But... I didn't see you use this. How are you controlling this computer?”

“Oh! That's right, you don't know. A few years back we did some experiments with computer implants. It turns out because we ponies are a designed species our bodies were built to accept and work with computer implants. Humans are an evolved species so their biology won't play nice with electronics, but the researchers figured out how to grow my synthetic cells in other humans and so today anyone who has used my cell treatment can use implants.”

“Computer implants? Implanted in what?”

Scootaloo indicated a spot on the right side of her head a little below the ear. “Touch my head just here, you should be able to feel it.”

Twilight reached out hesitantly with her magic while the screen on the wall began shifting again. It felt like there was a tiny lump under the skin on the side of Scootaloo's head. “You... You let them put a computer in your brain?!?”

The screen had turned into a movie, and Twilight watched as a human in white gloves made a small cut in another humans head, about the same place as Scootaloo's, and slipped a tiny wafer under the skin before stitching the flap of skin closed.

“See, there is nothing to it. This started out as a cure for blindness and we latter figured out how to use it for-”

“Wait, you mean this can help blind ponies see??” Twilight asked, pointing at the screen.

“Well yes, that's the main reason I signed up to help with it and got the first implant myself.” She indicated one of her ribs. “This implant allows me to control my prosthetic arms – my body adapted to it and now I can use and feel with my arms just as though they were flesh and blood. But that was just the first one. Implants can do so much more today. You don't even have to stay in the hospital overnight, and once the implant takes, you can control computers and other devices, interface with cameras, and access the entire internet all without an external screen like this.” She indicated the wall. “You may live in a library, but an even bigger library lives in me, and I can see everything you're seeing here inside my own head. Every bit of knowledge, every book and movie ever put on the internet is accessible to me all the time, anywhere I want it.”

That got Twilight's attention. The video played again and she asked.

“But... doesn't it hurt?”

“Well, not at the time. They give you painkillers to numb the area for a few hours, so you can't feel anything while they install it. Afterwards? Its sore, and stings if you poke it for the first couple of days, but in a couple weeks it heals up and you don't even notice it's there.”

She watched the gleam in Twilight's eyes as she stared at the screen in thought.
Scootaloo grinned “Relax. We have hundreds of these implants in this hospital alone, and if you decide you want one I don't think anyone will object but before you ask us to put a library in your head why don't you get used to using it the old fashioned way?”

Scootaloo showed her how to use a mouse and keyboard, and Twilight caught on quickly enough, using her magic in place of hands.

“Okay, first things first things first, let’s get you familiar with the planet I live on.”

As Twilight got used to the latest version of Google Earth, she explored first the neighborhood, then zoomed out to see states, countries, and the world as a whole. Inside of five minutes they had exhausted Scootaloo's basic knowledge and she began reaching for Wikipedia, a site which, once explained, delighted Twilight yet again. After at least an hour spent on the geography lesson, the topic became one of size, leading Scootaloo to pull up a different web site.

“Now what was that called... Something about scale.” She typed a few things into the search engine, and eventually found what she need. “Oh, that right, it was “The scale of the universe 2”

As the site loaded Scootaloo continued. “This will give you an idea for the scale of this world, and of our universe. Keep an eye on the measurement here that tells you how big each thing is. Lets run the slider in all the way, before we zoom out. Once you can identify everything in this table you'll have a much better grasp on where you are and the scale of everything.”

That consumed another couple hours with numerous side trips back to Wikipedia when deeper explanations were called for. Scootaloo could answer most questions about viruses, molecules and atoms, but when they got into really small things she wondered how she would have ever managed this without internet access.

Twilight's thirst for information was insatiable, and as they started taking the slider back out the other direction, past buildings and continents, then on to planets, stars and galaxies, a trip back to Wikipedia bounced them to “100,000 stars project”.

At some point in the last few hours, someone had laid out a modest buffet on the back table, and about the time Twilight was exploring the nearby stars in the solar neighborhood, Scootaloo managed, not without some difficulty, to pulled her away from the controls long enough to eat.

Even after being reminded, Twilight was still vibrating with excitement. “Ish is show amashing!” Twilight mumbled around a mouthful of sandwich. “Ish world ish so uge and comficated and-”

Scootaloo put a hand against her mouth. “Easy Twilight, eat, then talk.” She couldn't help but smile “Jeez, you're acting like Pinkie Pie.”

Twilight made a visible effort to calm down, closing her eyes and finishing her current sandwich. “Sorry, it’s just... We don't have anything like this back home! And finding things in a library full of books, even with a good librarian takes so much longer!”

Scootaloo smiled modestly “Well I have had time to prepare. I've have been hoping for this chance most of my adult life. Getting to introduce a brilliant unicorn to my adopted world? Do you have any idea how many people wanted to be the one here, showing you all this for the first time?”

Twilight stopped with another bite halfway to her mouth. “I guess I never thought of that. Were there a lot of...?” She saw the flat stare Scootaloo was giving her. “Right, we're minor celebrities here...”

There was a thoughtful pause before Scootaloo asked the next question on her study list. “Twilight, how much do you know about where different species come from? Evolutionary biology and the like?”

“I know a little about biology, but quite frankly, I'm not a veterinarian or a doctor like you are. If you need to know details about animals and nature, I'm not the first pony you should be talking to.”

“Hmm... That's what I was afraid you'd say. But that's okay, the next topic I wanted to cover was history, and for that I was going to start with earths history, which requires some background information to make sense of.”

The screen began moving again as Scootaloo fed a title into the search engine. “Lets see, these are usually available on youtube, but I have to get the titles right... 'Evolution: Darwin's Dangerous Idea'... There we go.” She said as the video loaded. “I might as well let the others load while we watch the first one... 'Evolution: Great Transformations', 'Evolution: Extinction!', then 'The Evolutionary Arms Race' and 'Why Sex?'. That should keep you busy for a while.” She added with a smile.

“We're going to watch movies?” Twilight asked as the first installment started to play, showing a group of humans on a hill top looking over a huge skull.

“Documentary, actually. Its about how all the plants and animals of this world came to look the way they do today, and how and why that happened. You have to understand this before I can teach you basic earth history and expect it to make any sense.”

Twilight sat down to watch and enjoy the food, occasionally asking questions. “These humans... uh, people, are dressed very differently from the ones I've met, and the language seems a bit different.”

“You have a good eye. This takes place in the country of Britain a little over 200 years ago.” She saw Twilight's confused look and added hastily; “This was recreated and filmed with actors in the last ten or twenty years. No one had video cameras when this actually happened.”

…

It was well after dark some eight hours later when Twilight finished the last of the series. Throughout the afternoon and into the evening various people had been quietly bringing food and drink, and within minutes of Scootaloo going home for the night, an older woman who introduced herself as Dr. Gregerson had taken a seat on her right and started answering questions for her as they came up. Now with the last credits wrapped up and the wall a dull white that illuminated the room, she looked over and asked; “Well, what do you think of terrestrial biology?”

Twilight looked overwhelmed. “I... I never suspected there was so much yet to learn! Can we keep going? I'm not tired at all yet!”

Mrs. Dr. Gregerson glanced at the clock and chucked. “There will be someone here around the clock to help you, but you will have to sleep eventually. Why don't we ask them to wheel in the bed and then we can do the rest of the night as a slumber party?”

Hearing this suggestion from someone who had to be at least as old as Granny Smith brought a smile to Twilight's face. “Okay, let’s make a sleepover of it and see how far we get!”

The good doctor was more than a little tired herself, and after bringing in the beds and settling in she smirked as a plan occurred that would let them both get some sleep. “Hey, we have another documentary about where things come from called 'How Its Made'; want to give it a try?”

As the soothing theme song played over and over, along with informative and pleasantly bland videos of factory work, the doctor soon fell asleep, and though she tried mightily to stay awake, in only half an hour Twilight too was snoring.

...

Rarity's arrival at the strip club had resulted in more than a few questioning looks, but once inside, the group fit right in, and she was soon talking technique with one of the dominatrices. As the night wore on, most of the patrons choose to overlook the bright white pony who was cheering the action on with the rest of them.

After the floor show had wrapped up for the night Tammy noticed Rarity looking a bit unsettled as she made for a side door. Following behind, she caught up with Rarity sitting on the hood of the car in the quiet stillness on the edge of the parking lot.

“Wow, you weren't kidding when you said you knew how to have a good time.” She kidded. “Are you okay? You look a little off...”

Rarity looked over as Tammy sat down beside her. “It's... It didn't occur to me until just now...” She seemed conflicted and reluctant to continue.

“Yes...?” Tammy gently prodded.

“It all felt so normal but...”

“But what? You were clearly having as good a time as the rest of us.”

Rarity looked unnerved. “But that's just it. I... We aren't even the same species! But I felt... Very attracted to some of the performers, and I don't know why.”

Tammy smiled in relief and put an arm around Rarity. “Is that all? I wouldn't worry about it if I were you, Scootaloo and her husband get along just fine.”

Rarity nodded, only half listening. Then her eyes shot open and she did a double take.

“WHAT?!”

Tammy couldn't help but grin. “What? I told you she had a husband and two adorable foals.”

“But! How can?...” She worked this through for a moment. “You mean when a pony and a human...?!”

“Huh? No, nothing like that. She married a fellow med student, now a doctor I think. When they decided they wanted kids, the medical techs offered their help, and she gave birth to two clones who have grown into adorable little foals. They just learned to talk recently.”

This was still a bit much to process all at once, so Rarity decided to stick to what she could understand. “So Scootaloo's attracted to humans too?”

“Well yes. We covered a bit of this in college Bio last year. Ponies like you and Scootaloo have human brains. You're a designed species, and attracted to each other, but you're using human hardware as it were. Apparently whoever designed you never bothered, or couldn't, remove the attraction to other humans.”

“Now wait just a second, I'm not a human! I'm a Pony, just like everyone else I know!... Well, almost everyone else.” She finished lamely, as she remembered who she was talking to.

“Sorry Rarity, but no. Your mind is not that of a pony. I was a little girl once. I've seen ponies, and they are dumb animals. Even if you somehow boosted their brains, they would be a very weird species.” She paused and thought about it. “The whole dominance hierarchy and the female harem thing would be especially weird in a thinking race...”

She took a few minutes to explain what her college professor had taught on the topic; the medical studies, the MRIs, and all the rest. Rarity was no fool, but even she had some trouble adjusting to the fact that her mind had evolved to run a monkey body, not a pony body.

“I know this is a lot to take in. Scootaloo grew up with this; she never knew anything else.” She sighed and thought for a moment.
“Why don't I go gather up the girls and we can take them home? It's already well after midnight, and we really aught to get to bed soon. I know I hinted at this, but would you be willing to spend the night at our place? My daughter would really like to meet you, she's a huge fan.”

Rarity returned her smile, happy to be back on a more comfortable topic. “Of course, I'd be happy to meet her. And then in the morning we'll look up Scootaloo?”

“Of course. Thank you so much for letting me show you the town, I've really enjoyed it, even with the inevitable weirdness.” She finished with a small grin.

…

It took some time to drive everyone else home, but at length they dropped the classic car back at the dealership, cleaned it up and drove to Tammy's home in something called a 'Camry'. Her house was an unassuming ranch style home with one other car in the drive, and a dim light shining in the kitchen window.

Tammy unlocked the front door and took a moment to show Rarity where to find the kitchen, bathroom, and the spare bedroom. “Will this be enough for the night?” Tammy asked, gesturing to the modest, but clean and tidy bedroom.

“Of course darling,” Rarity yawned despite herself. “The bed does look inviting. Thank you again for you kind hospitality, I-”

Rarity trailed off as she caught sight of the child standing in the doorway wearing her pajamas and holding her teddy bear. Samantha had been woken by the odd sound of hooves on tile, and had heard her mother quietly talking with someone who's voice sounded oddly familiar. Now as she realized who was visiting, her eyes were nearly bugging out of her head. Acting quickly, her mother took her by the hand and made introductions.

Rarity, this is my daughter, Samantha. Sammy, please remember that Daddy is sleeping, and keep it quiet. I think you already know Rarity.”

Sammy held out a hand, obviously trying not to squeal with glee. “Miss Rarity? Are you really real?”

Rarity smiled as she reached out a hoof and shook the little hand. “Of course I am darling, what else would I be? Your mother told me you know me from the show?”

Tammy wished them both goodnight, glad she didn't have to get Sammy up for school the next morning. As she fell asleep in the next room she could hear the two of them going on and on as Rarity asked about which adventures had been featured on the show.

After exhausting that topic, Sammy had a suggestion. “Ms. Rarity? I know its late but... Could you give me a makeover?” She asked with her best Bambi eyes. “Please? I have my own makeup box and everything!”

Rarity was beginning to feel the lateness of the hour by now, but even her heart melted a little under Sammy's pleading eyes.
“Oh all right, but only a quick one, and then we both need our sleep.”

Sammy leapt to her feet and ran to fetch her makeup box while Rarity sighed and lay back on the bed. As she stretched, she caught sight of the beautiful shoes she had been wearing most of the night. They had been surprisingly comfortable, and so light she hardly had to think to keep them on, but it was nearly time for bed, and she idly let them go, expecting them to drop to the floor.

Nothing happened.

In confusion she sat up and shook her right front hoof, trying to shake off the aluminum shoe, but it remained firmly attached to her hoof. Confused now, and feeling a bit alarmed, she grabbed the shoe with her other hoof, pulled hard, trying to remove it, but it absolutely refused to budge, and no matter how she tried, every yank and tug from one hoof went right into the other.

Sammy came running back with her makeup box to find Rarity laying on her back, frantically trying to pry the shoe from her right front hoof. “Ms. Rarity? Are you okay?”

Rarity looked up in embarrassment. “Umm... Why yes darling, I'm fine, I just can't seem to get these shoes off.”

Sammy put down her box and came over to inspect her shoes. “Oh! These are so pretty. You are so lucky to get to wear shoes like that.”

Rarity was still feeling a bit unnerved, and no longer shared the feeling.
“Well yes, but it’s nearly time for bed, and I can't sleep in these. It wouldn't be ladylike.”

Sammy looked a bit sad. “I guess you're right. Why don't you take them off?”

Rarity looked down at the little girl, feeling quite embarrassed. “Um... I don't know how...”

Sammy raised an eyebrow, then gently took one of her hooves and looked at the shoe carefully. She sniffed her hoof, nodded, and went back to dig something out of her makeup box.

“Uh... What are you doing dear?” Rarity asked, more confused at being sniffed than anything else.

“Those are Scootaloo's old shoes. I saw her wear them on TV once.” Sammy responded. “I just need some acetone to remove the glue.”

“Glue?!” Rarity asked in consternation. “They glued the shoes to my hooves!?!”

Sammy returned with a bottle of nail polish remover and began carefully painting it on around the inside and outside of the offered shoe. “Well yeah silly, the only other way to keep shoes on a pony is... kind of icky.”

Rarity gave the child an arch look. “What could possibly be worse than glue? It’s like some kind of joke Rainbow might try.”

Sammy made a face as she finished applying the acetone. “Well glue is pretty new. They say Scootaloo didn't use to wear shoes often because she thought the nails were icky.”

Rarity's eyes widened. “Nails?!”

“Well yeah, see these little holes around the bottom of the shoe? That's where you pound in the lead nails that hold the shoe on.” Rarity looked like she was trying not to faint as the child continued. “It doesn't hurt, at least Scootaloo says it doesn't, but she never liked it much, so until someone told her about the glue, she didn't like wearing shoes.” Sammy gave a little tug, and the shoe came off Rarity's hoof. “There, see? Why don't you lay down so I can do the others. It'll be like doing each others nails!”

Rarity backed up against the headboard in alarm. “Each other's nails?!?”

Sammy looked at her in confusion, then slowly puzzled it out, a look of amusement dawning on her little face. “No silly! People have finger nails, see?” She held out her hand for Rarity to inspect. “I like to do my nails in bright colors, especially blue and pink!” She said, indicating one of each color.

“Oh... Okay...” Rarity conceded as she laid back down and presented her hooves again. “Um... Do you have a second bottle of that?”

Sammy produced another bottle, and together they used the nail polish remover to break down the glue and get Rarity out of her shoes. When the last one fell to the floor with a 'clank', she sighed and stretched her hooves. “Much better. I just don't understand why Scootaloo would use something like this.”

Sammy was looking confused again. “Would you rather use the nails?”

Rarity winced. “No, of course not, but why not just wear them normally, like this?” She asked as she put her hoof in one of the shoes and held it in place while she shook her hoof. With a glance at Sammy, she released her hold, and the shoe dropped to the floor once more.

“Oh! Scootaloo doesn't have magic silly, she uses arms like the rest of us.”

Rarity listened in disbelief as Sammy raddled off the high points of Scootaloo's history, her prosthetics, learning to be a doctor, getting married and having kids. As she finished up, she yawned widely and looked at the clock which read 3:27 AM. Rarity followed her gaze and a bit of maternal instinct kicked in as she remembered that while her friends had left during the day, it was already night when they arrived here, and this poor child must be exhausted.

“Well, thank you for telling me that Sammy, but I think it’s time to get you back to bed. I can give you a proper makeover in the morning.”

“Oh...” Sammy tried to pout, but her attempt was interrupted by another yawn. Rarity smiled and packed up the makeup items back into their box with her magic.

“Ms Rarity? Can I sleep with you tonight?”

Four AM found them both sound asleep in the guest bed, Sammy's arms wrapped around one of Rarity's hooves as they both snored softly.

Comments

[Cozy Mark IV]

3290798
What? No!
Dashie's dad lived in Detroit, not exactly a bastion of free thinking and cultural acceptance. He could have been a member of any number or different faiths (not cults) that get picked on for being different.

[Scarheart]

Twilights jaw hung slack as Scootaloo continued. “And there aren't a few thousand computers in the world, there are billions of computers in this world.”
Twilight's gape became a look of consternation. “I don't know that word...”

I'm calling bullshit on this!

[p0nypanda]

d'awww at the last scene.

[PostPony]

3300371 it's conceivable that she would never have a reason to learn such a large number. (I reply to a year old comment)

[Moonwillowzer0]

5104650 I missed it by two days oh well it usually gets people thinking after such a great expanse of time.