when slenderman left me in paradise

by Jimbob

Back in my mind

[Knight]

{Me}

“I feel so uncomfortable doing this.”

“Don’t care~” Not nice Celestia, I mean you’re not the one that’s about to have what, eight? Yeah eight sentient minds running around in your head! Two of which were demigods and able to raise the sun and moon! For all I know the power you galls are packing will burn my body to a crisp.

“Oh Jake we’ll be on our best behavior!” Celestia had a smug little smile on her face that sent a chill through me. It must have shown because Twilight spoke up.

“Don’t worry Jake we’ve done this before remember?”

[Yes we do and if I recall correctly the end result of that was a dozen dead Timberwolves]

{That day sucked}

[Yeah it did]

While I was talking to myself the rest of the girls had sat around me in a circle and Celestia was sending out a tendril of magic to each girl. I am not okay with this. Tendrils of magic shot from each one of them into my skull, making my brain feel like it had frozen and shattered. Suddenly we were floating in a white space again. Quick must make room before joke is made!

“Wow Jake sure is empty in here” DAMN YOU CELESTIA! I grumbled silently under my breath as I imagined a room to take form. Ever so slowly a room began to take place, couches, recliners, a huge television, an entertainment center and snacks!

“Why the hell do we need snacks?” asked a dark humanoid shaped figure as it pulled itself off a recliner. Instead of answering I simply pointed at Pinkie Pie who had launched herself at the bowl of popcorn and began to eat contentedly.

“Right good point” I stuck my hand out.

“Good to see you again Knight” he took my hand and shook it.

“Likewise” sure I talk to him daily but it’s not often I actually get to meet him. I turned around to face the girls.

“Girls meet Knight, again, Knight meet girls, again.” Knight gave them a mock salute, glaring at Celestia for a second before moving on. I looked around the room, seemed like a small room with only a single door leading out. The door in question was more like a massive vault I looked it over and saw a hand scanner. Huh guess my mind had upgraded its security since last time, well alright then.

“Girls take a seat while I check something” I said as I moved to the door.

“Don’t take too long sugarcube.”

“Applejack you can’t rush perfection!”

“I’m not trying to rush perfection, I’m trying to rush you.” This got a giggle from the girls around the room, and a chuckle from Knight.

I put my hand in the scanner, but it felt more like my entire being was being scanned. After a second the door hissed and opened slightly leaving just enough room for me to get through, I turned back to Knight.

“Watch the girls, don’t let them touch ANYTHING!” I pointed at him as he saluted.

“Whatever you say boyo!” I ignored his implied sarcasm and continued into the room. And man was that room packed, hundreds upon hundreds of shelves with everything from books to board games on them. I was stunned for a minute, how the blue hell was I supposed to find anything in here.

“Try imagining the thing you want in front of you!” right cause he has so much practice in this field doesn’t he? Fuck it I’ll try anything once; I imagined anything MLP related appearing in front of me. I heard the sounds of cogs grinding and saw an entire shelf moving forwards. I looked on the shelf; Fan fictions, Artwork, Rule 34 (never showing them that), and finally the show.

I grabbed the case and momentarily wondered why the case was blank before a deep thrum of bass rattled my skull. If I didn’t like this song so much I would have destroyed him and all he stood for. I walked back towards the door I came into; I would be lying if I said I took no pleasure in seeing most of the ponies covering their ears.

The only ones not covering their ears were; Knight who was bobbing his head back and forth laughing at the girls covering their ears, Pinkie who was bouncing up and down in rhythm with the music, and Princess Luna who was smiling and tapping her hooves in time with the beat. I cackled maniacally and walked over to the radio and hit the power button.

“Aww why did you do that?” Luna pouted. I nearly died of diabetes right then, I also noticed Knight making a grab for his chest.

“Sorry Luna I found the show and figured that you would want to watch it now.” She immediately brightened up.

“Oh ok” oh thank god I don’t think I could handle another DAWW moment of that magnitude. I looked around at the ponies who were rubbing their heads and regaining their footing.

“What terribly unsophisticated music!” thanks for the vote of confidence there Rarity.

“What you call unsophisticated I call ‘Satisfaction’” that got a chuckle out of me, Luna and Pinkie, and a confused look from the rest who had been so busy trying to block out the music that they had missed the words in the song. Before I could say anything else Twilight spoke up.

“What kind of music was that?” I pondered for a moment

“I suppose that it would be called Techno or something along those lines.” Before I could continue she spoke up again.

“Are there a lot of ‘Techno’ songs?” I sighed

“Please hold all questions till the end of the tour” I said as I moved towards the DVD player ignoring the look I got from Twilight. I popped in the disc and sat down in the recliner grabbing the nearest remote.

“Mares and Demons I present to you My Little Pony.” I pressed the play button and a song drifted through the speakers.

Comments

[Kablex]

Good job, could you reference when Pinkie breaks the forth wall for the first time, that would be extremely funny.

[Jimbob]

560662
i'll see what i can do

[Kablex]

560673 Thanks

[Diabolic Gnome]

ENOUGH WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING CLIFF HANGERS

[Jimbob]

560705
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Solar Eclipse]

Damn cliffhangers... THEIR DEATH SHALL BE SLOW AND PAINFUL.

[jercos]

If one were to get technical, I do believe that's a subgenre of House, Tech house, containing more House elements than Techno elements.

On the other hand, yes, Luna has the best reaction.

[The First]

Wait a sec, if Pinkie breaks the fourth wall and sees the viewer and Pinkie is watching Pinkie whilst Pinkie does her thing, then Pinkie will tag-team with Pinkie and double the fun, causing Pinkie to break the fourth wall surrounding the show with another fourth wall that causes the fourth wall to collapse around Pinkie whilst talking with Pinkie.

[Book644]

561837
.....what
my brain is fuck right now

[CaptainAwesome]

561837 But wouldn't that cause reapers to show up and wipe out all life from Equestria.
*must watch Doctor Who to understand comment about paradoxes*