when slenderman left me in paradise

by Jimbob

ZEE DOCTOR!

[Knight]

{Me}

*poke*

“Quit it lemme sleep….”

*jab*

“URGH stop!”

*JAB*

“FINE!” I cracked open my eye to see three fillies staring back.

“Umm good morning?” why are they staring at me like I’m an alien? Oh wait.

“GOOD MORNING MR.ALIEN!” AHHH MY POOR DEFENSELESS EARS! WHY!?

“Good morning! Who are you three?” I’m so full of shit.

“I’m Sweetie Belle!”

“I’m Applebloom!”

“And I’m Scootaloo!”

“AND TOGETHER WE ARE THE CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!!” AGAIN WITH THE EARDRUMS!

“Alrighty then, got any food?” I need my muffin fix.

“Umm no sorry”

“Don’t sweat it Sweetie Belle, now then which way to the cafeteria” I got out of bed and followed the three crusaders out into the hall-way.

“FOOD” I groaned “need muffins” the girls giggled at my silliness.

[Silliness? I’m dead fucking serious we need some godamn muffins!]

{Damn right}

I entered the cafeteria and suddenly everything got quiet.

{Seriously there still scared of me?! I stuck my neck out for three fillies for Christ sake!}

“THERE HE IS!”

Wait WHAT?!

Suddenly I was being lifted off the ground by a group of ponies and carried towards a table overflowing in food.

{Or maybe they’re not so afraid anymore}

They set me down right in front of a pile of blueberry muffins.

“No words should have sent a poet” I whispered before setting into the muffins with a relish.

“Ok who told you what my favorite muffin was?” I asked a blue unicorn that had a paper and quill as his cutiemark. My money’s on Pinkie.

“It was Twilight that told us” well didn’t see that coming.

“Aww come on Jakey-wakey it can’t always be me”

{She right behind me isn’t she?}

[WHERE THE ACTUAL FUCK DID SHE COME FROM?!]

{Dude I gave up trying to figure Pinkie out a while ago}

“So Pinks do you know if I can leave yet?”

“Hmmm let’s go ask Doctor Whooves!"

“Yeah I need to ask him about the tardis anyway” I chuckled.

“OH! You mean that big blue box thing that goes WOOOAH-WOOOAH-WOOOAH?”

“Ummm yes that the one. How do you know about it?”

She mimed zipping her mouth, locking it, and burying the key.

“Right not gonna tell me alrighty then” I got up and followed Pinkie out of the room leaving the CMC to devour whatever food was left. Pinkie started leading back past my room when Twilight burst out of my room and right into me.

I looked up and saw purple eyes staring right back at me.

“Morning Twi”

“J-Jake! What are you doing wandering the halls!?” she got off of me blushing and I picked myself up with a little help from my cane.

“I was wondering the hall towards the cafeteria and more recently towards Doctor Whooves I think” I looked over and Pinkie hadn’t even stopped.

“PINKIE WAIT UP!” I limped my way towards her with Twilight in tow.

“Why were you looking for the Doctor?” ha Doctor.

“Cause I want out of this hospital!” Pinkie turned towards a door and knocked. A brown earth pony with an hourglass as his cutiemark opened the door.

“TARDIS!” He jumped in the air and turned to face me while I was grinning like the fool I was.

“Evening Doctor” I said as I walked to the storeroom he had been in.

“So tell me what caused you to change into a pony?”

“I-I’m quite sure I have no idea what it’s you’re talking about, I have always been a pony”

“Lies, you couldn’t have fought of the Daleks or Cybermen as a pony oh no you were a timelord! Although you did have a knack for having unique problems” his eyes narrowed.

“Friend or foe?” I definitely didn’t want to be on the Doctor’s bad side.

“Friend, I think” I stuck my hand out and he shook it.

“How do you know so much about me?” he was still glaring at me accusingly.

I tapped my head.

“I could tell you but you know how dangerous Spoilers can be don’t you” he grudging accepted that answer. Twilight who looked thoroughly confused by now finally spoke up with rapid fire questions.

“What are you two talking about?! How could you possibly know him?! What are Daleks?” I looked over at her.

“well you did better than I expected but ummm how do I say this, never ever telling you unless the situation is absolutely dire.” Yep fact of the matter, I’ll deal with the annoying questions later.

“So anyway Doc can I leave the hospital?” the Doctor looked back over at me

“Not a chance you’re nowhere near back at full strength you still have a few more days of recovery left” I bent down towards the Doctor and whispered

“Here’s the deal Doc either you let me out of here or I tell Twilight there just enough information about you to get her to bombard you with questions till it drives you to the utter brink of insanity”

“You wouldn’t”

“Hey Twi you were wondering what a Timelord was right?” Twilight perked up as if she was about to start writing down every word I said.

“On second thought Jake the fresh air might do you some good so you can leave whenever you’re ready”

“That’s what I thought thanks Doc” I chuckled as I left the room ignoring Twilight death stare. I headed back to my room and collected my sword and gun before heading back towards the front desk.

“Jake who is he?”

“He’s Doctor Whooves”

“No he’s not you were acting like you had met him before”

“I can personally assure you Twi we have never met until today”

[Yeah we just watched him travel through time and space to save the human race hundreds of time]

{When you say it like that it makes me sound like a stalker}

[You kinda were, hell you even blackmailed him]

{I wouldn’t give up his secret so easily but I really hate hospitals}

[Yeah I know]

When I got the front desk I went through the whole paper signing thing and Twilight started to get some bits from her saddlebag.

“Oh no you don’t Twi I can pay for myself now”

“What? Where did you get money?” I stuck my hand into the shadows and pulled out a bit that was silver and had a 50 stamped on it I flipped it too the nurse behind the counter and headed out the door.

“Well you know how dragons have hoards of treasure?” she nodded “well when I beat the dragon I moved all his treasure into the shadows and now I have plenty of bits, I could probably move out soon” she looked sad at the aspect of me leaving.
“Don’t worry Twi I’ll still be around a lot since I love to read and need to catch up on Equestrian History” as well as some other reasons. She perked up a bit at that.

“Oh and we need to have a talk about you going off and fighting a dragon by yourself” I mentally groaned.

[Should have quit while you were ahead]

{Quiet you}

It was going to be a long walk back to the library.

Comments

[Kablex]

Yay the doctor!

[jercos]

SO, our Gary Stu has a dragon's horde, leverage on the Doctor, and House's limp, and has tamed the demon that forced Slenderman's hand with muffins.

It's a good thing I enjoy this sort of thing

[Jimbob]

372279

fair enough i'll see what i can do to make him more dimensional

[Solar Eclipse]

My internets. Take all of them.

[The First]

372378
Good job sir, have a TARDIS

kasterborus.com/tardis/tardis/tardis!.jpg

[The Lich King]

372279
and has tamed the demon that forced Slenderman's hand with muffins.
that forced Slenderman's hand with muffins.
hand with muffins.
with muffins.
MUFFINS.
mixdaweb.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/984e0__inglip.jpg

[Lord_Kalbario]

373389 dude! you nearly made me crap myself from laughing

[MrPikmario]

Longer chapters plox?