Sabotage
Rainbow Dash stood in Lyra's inspiration room as the unicorn brushed her rainbow colored mane.
"You really are going a little far with this, Dash. Don't you think?" Lyra asked. "I mean, we're only doing this to get back at Spirit, you know?" she turned away from Rainbow's mane to look at her face and saw the far-off expression that had formed. "Dash?"
"Huh? What?" Rainbow said as she shook away her thoughts.
"Never mind," Lyra said. "It's not important."
"Ok, guys, here's the plan," Bon Bon started as her friend's faces turned to them. "Me and Lyra will make our way to Sugarcube Corner. Then, after about ten minutes or so, you start coming, ok Rainbow?"
"Ok," Dash said.
"Great. Let's go, Lyra." the two ponies began trotting out of Lyra's house. After Rainbow Dash heard the front door close behind them, she walked over to her saddle bags that were leaning against a wall. She flipped one open with her hoof and stuck her muzzle inside. She pulled out a small fold of paper. Rainbow Dash unfolded it, revealing a crumpled and torn picture of her five friends having a group hug; with Dash in the middle.
...
Rainbow Dash trotted through the park on her way to Sugarcube Corner. Thunderlane filled her thoughts. It seemed like forever since she saw him last, even though it had just been the day before.
Dash's mane hung down over her shoulders. Lyra had insisted on using a flat iron on it that morning, and Bon Bon insisted on sprinkling glitter on her coat. She looked more girly than she liked, but it was all worth it if it meant seeing Thunderlane and getting back at Spirit at the same time.
Rainbow Dash nearly fell over as she ran into something sturdy.
"Rainbow Dash," Applejack said. "First you draw pictures of him, then you go out with some random stallion? For shame. I can't believe you would do this to my brother."
"Look, Aj. I don't know what Spirit told you, but I really don't have time for this right now," Dash said as she tried to swerve around the mare.
"No, Rainbow Dash," she said as she stepped in front of Rainbow in an effort to keep her where she was. "I don't know what's going on in that little head of yours, but as of now, we ain't friends anymore." The harsh words departed from her lips just before she turned around and slowly walked away.
Rainbow sighed. She couldn't let this bring her down. Not today, and not right now. Eyes on the prize, she thought. Eyes on the prize.
...
Rainbow Dash pushed the door to the bakery open with her hoof. She stepped inside and searched for a few ponies. First, she looked around to see if Spirit was there. Of course she was; sitting at a table near the front with all of her new friends, save for Applejack. Then, she found Lyra and Bon Bon, sitting at their usual table near the wall. Then, of course, there was Thunderlane, waving Rainbow over.
She trotted to the table as a tray with four zapapple cupcakes came into view. She sat down and took one of the cakes.
"Hey, Dash! Glad you made it," Thunderlane said as his face turned slightly pink.
"Me too. I was almost late because-" the pegasus stopped herself when she realized it might not be such a good idea to tell Thunderlane about a certain caramel colored pony.
"Yeah?" the stallion across from her asked.
"Uh, I had to catch the mailpony, because," she stuttered as she tried to think up an excuse. "He dropped off the wrong package." She smiled a nervous smile and her companion smirked.
"He does that to me all the time," he said as he carefully placed a hoof over Dash's. Rainbow saw a horribly angry expression form on Spirit's face in the corner of her eye.
"So, guys, guess what? I brought one of the pictures I found today!" She said rather loudly. Getting to her hooves, she unfolded the paper, revealing a poorly drawn picture of Big Macintosh with the words "Rainbow + Mac" scrawled across it as Applejack's voice filled the room.
"Rainbow Dash!" she screamed. "I thought I told you to stop it!" Laughter filled the room, nearly drowning out Applejack's anger.
"What?" Thunderlane asked, confused. "I thought- I thought we had something special here." He got up out of his chair as his face turned dark red. "This is over!" he yelled before turning to gallop out the door.
"Thunderlane, wait!" Rainbow Dash screamed after him. She shot a dirty look at Spirit, and slumped to the floor. A single tear rolled down her face and landed on the wooden planks. Laughter surrounded her, and she could feel everyone staring. Instinctively, she galloped out of the bakery, and she didn't stop until she got home.
...
Once again, Rainbow Dash had her muzzle buried in a pillow, but this time it wasn't to hide her screams of joy. This time, it was to muffle her sobs. Her mane was messy and tangled, and her coat no longer sparkled. Then, she heard hoofsteps out in the hall.
Rainbow Dash burst through her bedroom door to find Spirit, Applejack, and the four ponies who had laughed the hardest.
"Yes?" Spirit asked, while trying to hide a smirk. Rainbow's face turned red and hot and tears came streaking down it as the memory of the laughter erupted in her brain.
"Get out!" she screamed. "All of you, get out of my house! Now!" All of her enemy's mouths dropped open as she yelled. None of them, not even Twilight, had seen Rainbow Dash so angry before in all their lives. "Are you deaf? I said get out!" She jumped in front of them all and stuck her wings up. One of her front hooves brushed the ground as if she was going to charge. Everypony began to slowly back up.
"Fine! We're leaving, ok?" Spirit said before she turned to face her friends. "Well don't just stand there! Come on," she said as she began walking through the group. All of them turned to leave the house.
Rainbow heard the door slam shut, and she turned tail and darted into Spirit's room. She ripped apart the blankets and pillows, tipped over all of the furniture, and ripped all the papers to shreds. Then, she realized that she should have read those papers. She should have invaded Spirit's privacy like Spirit claimed to have invaded her's. She ran to get her saddlebags.
Dash bit down on the middle strap of the bags and ran back into Spirit's room. She carefully picked up all the scraps of paper and put them in the saddlebags. Then, she left her house to go see Lyra and Bon Bon.
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Y'know it's kinda hard to believe that the element of HONESTY couldn't tell Dash was telling the truth
3281470
it just means that applejack is honest it doesnt mean she can tell dash is telling the truth. if you dont like it dont read it.
I personally LOVE this chapter. I love the way this is going. I really want to help with the next one. btw, yay!
3282397
yay!
3275370 RAINBOW87DASH YOU NEED TO STOP OK?! NOT ONE PERSON HIRED YOU TO COMMENT MY ON FRIENDS STORY! YOU ALSO NEED TO STOP CRITICIZING!!! IF YOU WANT A BETTER STORY THEN GO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THIS BUT GIVE US CREDIT FIRST! NOW NO ONE ASKED YOUR OPINION SO JUST STOP TRYING TO "FIX" THINGS!!! GOOD DAY SIR!
3287984
thnx, rd73!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3248943
uh... what exactly do you mean by that?
also, please dont copy my story.
Ok, so here's the deal:
Story plot: interesting. It is a nice change, I like it.
Character's personality: Good, no one can get spot on.
Development: Nice job
The only thing I find lacking, and really want, is more fluff in the story (not sure if this means to you what it means to me). Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the story, but I could go for more content per chapter.
Still worthy of a favorite though. Good job!
Stay Awesome
RDD
P.S.-I bloody hate Spirit Dash. That is a good sign. I means I am into the story.
P.P.S.- Dash should beat Spirit into the dust. She deserves it.
P.P.P.S.-If you ever want me to help write or edit something, PM me and I will do as fast as I can.
3297757
) so.....
thanks! I will try to add more content into each chapter! also, i know that rd can beat her into the dust, (and that might happen later on!
Thank you!!!
Now, I have to agree with 3275370 this story is extremely lacking in certain areas, most notably, character development and behaviour
it just seems....off.
You could have at least given more backstory to Spirit
3301199
does anypony actually read the comments i post? anypony? anypony at all?
3301429 why the heck are you writing anypony?
3301199 I've been mentioned....why?
3301629 uhh...no reason, go back to whatever you were doing, previously!
Kidding, I was just backing up your uhh...statement?
3301636
okay then? C'ya I ain't gonna get involved in whatever you're doing ya crazy nut....
3301641 I'm not a crazy nut! I'm a walnut, there's a difference!
3301647
wow just....wow
We'll good sir I shall be leaving you now, remember, breathing is important!
3301623
because this is a pony site.
3302046
excuse me, but I have a strict no-cussing policy.
3302066>>3302063
STOP! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! BOTH OF YOU! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF EVERYONE USING MY COMMENTS TO FIGHT! MOSTLY YOU, SCOOTATRONV2! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? YOU DON'T NEED TO TALK ABOUT ANYONE THAT WAY AND I AM PUTTING A STOP TO IT RIGHT NOW!
3302066 umm i never started crying your just asuming and my mother is fine she in matter of fact is doing her COLLAGE homework right in front of me which is a 4 page essay on a communication class
3302066 and when you look in front of you what do you see? a mom, a dad, someone? my family is trying hard to pull itself up out of the junk we are in what is your family doing?are the lounging in front of their HD TV? are they having a family game night? answer me.what kind of family do you have? a rich one? a poor one?
why wont you answer scootatron?
3302087 I have a middle class family actually, nice house, a hard working dad and sister, I don't own much just my laptop, a small tv and an old xbox. Things have been hard since my mom passed away. My dad's been having to do overtime just to get the bills payed.
3302118 see, this hit a nerve, my dad is in jail while my mom is going to school trying to get paid there, because she cant get a job and was trying to file bankruptcy but couldnt pay for even that, but the thing the hit a nerve was that well...... im sorry about what i said about you mom i realize it was unfair for me to say that
and sorry for being impatient
3302112 jeez your a little impatient
3302130 yea sorry about going all crazy about that, it's just, I really miss her y'know? When you loose somebody close to ya, it's really hard to move on.
3302146
i still cry when i think about him, and it was 4 years ago.
tell me about it! my favorite uncle was murdered.
3302131>>3302146 im so sorry, i feel like such a jerk and i dont know what its like to have a family member pass away but i know what its like to have a family member leave maybe its not as tragic but its something and my sisters dad passed away even though i dont morn often or at all (that sounds a little messed up but yeah) i sort of know what its like because ive seen my sister cry and miss him.
3302153 jeez you must have been close, whenever I'm in school and some ******* says something about my mom, I just feel like punching the in the jaw! And on some occasions I actually did. But deep down, every comment, every word they say about her, I break a little inside. Sometimes I just break down. I don't even know why I'm telling you this, It just feels good to tell someone about it.
3302177
please please please please edit your comment because there is a curse in it.
3302164 you ever heard the expression 'you only know you love something when it's gone?' I learnt that the hard way, I never used to listen to my mom, I always used to say bad things to her. But now that she's gone, I want to take back every rude or hurtful comment I've ever said to her. I want to tell her I much she meant to me. But I can't, and that's what hurts the most.