• Published 17th Sep 2013
  • 2,547 Views, 32 Comments

My Little Freaks: Equestria against Outcasts - Okhlahoma Beat-Down



Twilight Sparkle, in her new Princesshood, decides to summon several different creatures from another universe to learn of their habits. Unfortunately, after summoning a batch from the wrong universe, she is forced to care for several violent freaks.

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Stealth, Scunting, and Stares

In the few seconds of confusion, GentleSpy realised he had a short time-frame to organise everyone, and get them out of the stone room before it became flooded with guards. Of course, he could off them easily, but he just felt...wrong to shoot ponies. He raised his hand and began to call out quickly. "Gentlemen! We must move fast!" He looked up for an escape route. Finally, he saw it; on top of the shelves, there was a large air-duct. His obvious idea came right then. "Clamber to the top and into the air vent! Hurry!" he shouted, pointing to it. The other freaks, and normal mercs, looked up, then at him, and finally nodded. The groups organised as fast as they could, and made the climb up the shelves to the vent.

The first to arrive was a RED Sniper with an Unusual Trophy Belt. He grabbed the ventilation cover, gave it a firm yank, and ripped it off. Down below, Seeman and Seeldier formed the utmost impenetrable barrier with their limb-flailing dances and actually rather terrifying faces. The Sniper clambered inside the vent and immediately began to crawl all the way to the end, where it looked like there was a corner or light source of some description. Behind him, several other mercs crawled along, and moved to the end to fit as many people in the tube as possible. Finally, when he reached the end, he turned, and curled up against the walls of the vent, with the others sitting just beside him. He looked to his left, and saw that a BLU Spy was sat next to him; Charmer's Chapeau, Cut-Throat Concierge, and Sneaky Spats of Sneaking all painted gold. He didn't recognise him, so he could only assume he was from another map. However, he figured it was worth staying together with anybody he could so he wasn't caught alone by a freak.

However, back in the library, GentleSpy was ushering the other freaks up as fast as he could. However, just after Painis slid up the wall on his front, he was due to climb up himself when he noticed that in the corner of the room, there was a small pony, and Christian's Spy friend. He called over. "Spy! Let us move!" The RED Spy in the corner looked up at GentleSpy, before looking back at the pony. She looked up at the Spy, then at the air-vent, then at GentleSpy.

"He isn't coming, I don't think." Brutalight sneered. "Now why don't you just run along, sir?" GentleSpy frowned, nodded, and clambered into the air vent. The cover slammed shut behind him. This left Seeldier, Brutalight Sparkcake, Spy, and Seeman in the library, all pretty much ready for whatever the ponies could do. However, just then, the doorway darkened. Stood in the doorway was a frowning Princess Celestia.

"What is the meaning of this?" she said firmly. The tall white alicorn had an air of seriousness about her, which, of course, was instantly dissolved by the heavy metal and ridiculous dancing of Seeman and Seeldier, who found her to be utterly hilarious. They stopped dancing and began to stand in front of the terrified Princess with blank faces and slightly large heads. She reeled back at their sudden invasion of personal space as both guards flanking her readied magic blasts. Seeldier simply pointed a finger at the sun goddess.

"See!" he said loudly to Seeman.

"SEE!" laughed Seeman, as they both carried on their limb-dance. Celestia stared at this. I can't just let these two stay here... Suddenly, she had an idea. Feigning surprise, she looked back out into the corridor, then turned back to the two See-related creatures.

"Wow, look what's to see out there in the corridor!" she said, mocking interest. Both creatures looked excitedly at each other, before teleporting outside the door. The guards could deal with them, Celestia thought. With the barricade of See out of the way, she moved further into the library. Of course, she'd heard that her fellow Princess had apparently been attacked by a creature in a red suit, and had to be careful. Followed by the two guards that flanked her either side, she moved into the library. She was absolutely certain that she'd find something.


The ventilation duct was cramped enough, until Painis came shotgun-clicking into the shaft along the ceiling. Immediately, all guns in the area pointed at him, and for the first time in his life...Painis Cupcake was scared. He knew he couldn't eat anybody, so he simply stayed on the roof and stared at one, specific Heavy, who was simply glaring back with shotgun aimed at the Soldier. At the other end of the steel tube, GentleSpy sat beside Christian.

"Now we must wait." he said. Christian nodded, and looked around. He seemed confused, and began looking desperately around the tube.

"Spy!" he called. "Spy, where are ya, mate?" GentleSpy placed a gloved hand on his friend's shoulder, and shook his head.

"He didn't want to come. He's staying with his pony friend back in the library. They're safe, I assume, since the See-friends are there with them, and from what I remember, the name of the pony was Brutalight. So, if anything goes wrong, she could probably butcher the rest of them. Right now, though, we need to find a way to escape those guards."

"OK, mate." Christian replied. He then turned to the rest of the people in the tunnel. "Oi!" he shouted. All heads turned, and a lot of people expected a radio to appear. "Get bloody goin'!" he called the end of the shaft. A RED Sniper and BLU Spy nodded to each other, and began to slowly crawl around the corner of the tunnel. Several dozens of freaks were crawling amidst humans, and some were absolutely indistinguishable from regular mercs. For instance, Dr. Noooo was in the middle of a small pack of Medics, and any other guy would assume he was a regular doctor. However, he wasn't; his medi-gun could heal any ailment once per hour, and he healed everybody who had no evil relations or intents. Right behind him was a wooden cut out of a Medic, otherwise known as a MeeM, and if even he wasn't attacking, GentleSpy was certain that these were really desperate times.


Staregineer heard footsteps behind him in the silence. There was multiple sets, so it was likely a group of people. Hopefully, they were interesting. So, Staregineer turned away from the interesting bookshelf and to his new guests. To his interest, there were 3 little horses, with one being about 1 or 2 heads taller than him. They were wearing clothes, and all 3 were white, with two wearing a kind of gold armour, and the tall one wearing golden regalia. They were absolutely the most interesting things!

Staregineer looked right into the eyes of the shocked pony guard.


Steel Hide saw in the eyes of the creature...oblivion.

He felt his very soul being glared into, but he found himself unable to look away. The eyes; they locked his gaze unto them.

It was impossible for the stallion to last.

Steel Hide, Conqueror of Iron Hoof mountain, winner of the Faustian War medal, and personal guard of Princess Celestia, was brought to his knees by Staregineer.


Celestia quickly knelt down by the hyper-ventilating guard. He was on his side with eyes glazed, breathing quickly and heavily, and his visible fur was matted with sweat. She knew Steel Hoof could take most physical injuries with ease, then hit back twice as hard, but psychological attacks? She had to act fast; instantly teleporting him away to the infirmary. Then, looking back up, she kept her gaze away from the eyes of the creature in the hopes of finding a way to stop its gaze. She looked it over; it had brown dungarees, a red shirt, and hard-hat, and around its neck was a removed pair of goggles. She smirked, ignited her horn, and placed the goggles on his eyes. Then, looking him in the eyes, she realised she was still alive. He did still have the blank stare, but less...soul-crushing.

"Creature," Celestia said firmly, binding his hands behind his back. "You're coming with me."

Staregineer didn't really care. This pony was interesting.


RED Sniper raised a hand to stop everybody else. The simultaneous bump that followed shifted him forward slightly onto the ventilation grid in the ceiling. He looked down through the steel bars; down below, there was a huge chamber with a marble floor and red carpet, with the end leading out of sight. It looked like a church of some description. He looked over his shoulder. "Tell the bosses that we've got a possible exit below. Pass it down, lads."

The BLU Spy behind turned around, and looked at the Soldier behind him. "Exit ahead."

Soldier nodded, and turned to the Demopan behind him. "Exit ahead."

Demopan nodded, and turned to the Engineer. "Stout Shako, for 2 refined."

Engineer nodded, and turned to Scout. "Ahh...'pparently there's a hole."

Scout nodded, and turned to Vagineer. "Yo, dere's a hole in the floor."

Vagineer looked at the Sniper behind him, who nearly evacuated his bowels. ".sessob eht ot nwod ti ssaP .rendrap, daeha pu roolf eht ni eloh a s'ehreht ,yeH" Sniper simply thought for a moment, and shrugged. He turned to the small, white pony with purple hair and Team Captain sat beside him.

"Let's go down the hole, Shiela." he said, putting a thumb up.

"Of course, since you put it so politely." Rarifruit smiled. Then, she turned. "EVERYBODY DOWN THE HOLE!" she yelled. A cheer arose, and the force of everybody shoving one RED Sniper down a hole finally broke the ventilation cover off its hinges. The Australian fell around 30ft from the roof, and landed face first onto the floor. Nobody else fell down, though. He groaned, and got up, snapping his back into place as he stood. Suddenly, he was picked up in a blue aura of power, and he was pulled backwards. Staring back at him was a blue horse, with a flowing blue starry mane and tail, black crown and regalia, and adorable turquoise eyes. She also had a happy face.

"Thou shalt be a fine pet!" she giggled, before putting Sniper on her back and trotting calmly out of the room. RED Snoipeh had no say, so just enjoyed the feeling of having his head smacked against a mare's bum repeatedly as he received dodgy looks from guards around the place.


BLU Spy watched in horror as the pony pulled his new friend away and took him from the room. He overheard 'pet', and assumed that Sniper was now under the care of a talking blue horse. He looked back. "Tell me;" he began, "Why did we not go with him?" The RED Soldier with the Unusual Armored Authority shrugged, and stubbed his cigar on his own hand.

"He'll be remembered, Soldier." grunted the American trooper as he doffed his cap and turned around. "He was taken by enemy troops on 14th November, 1963, and as far as we know is a Prisoner of War. Do not worry troops, we WILL save Balbo Biggins." Suddenly, there was a purple field that pushed everybody down the hole. A cluster of yells and shouts was heard as the dozens of 'humans' fell down the shaft, and landed in a big pile at the bottom in the middle of the throne room. Stood at the end of the Vent was Brutalight and Spy, along with Christian and GentleSpy.

"Fine job, Madame." GentleSpy politely said, smiling and raising a thumb at the corrupted alicorn. She winked at him. Spy remained silent.

"Let's go, mates." Christian said cheerfully, as all 5 began to go down the tunnel. "Say, what happened to Seeman, Seeldier, and Staregineer?"

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