Of a Certain Adventurous Pony

by RavensDagger

Arc One: Welcomings - Short Skirts

We stepped out, Black Ruby just ahead of me, walking with a straight back and a grim grin.

The crowd was thinner here at the front, cut off by the row of leather wearing hooligans that the Protagonist seemed to control. And so, with little difficulty, we snuck up behind them and were at the very edge of the stage.

“Levitate me up,” Black Ruby whispered as she slipped into the shadows pitched by the crowd.

“Um, I can’t?” I said, cringing at her inevitable rebuking. It never arrived.

Instead, what happened was rather surprising. She looked at me, nodded firmly then whispered. “Use your magic to soften the landing then, even you should be able to do that.”

I was wrapped in an indigo tendril of magic that dug into my gut, cutting off my air supply until my eyes watered and all I could do was gasp and stare while ponies began to notice us.

That’s when she threw me.

It was an interesting moment. Floating up in the air, fresh breath flooding my lungs while I watched the rapidly approaching stage. The crowd looked at me, many of them gasping. The grabbing of attention was probably aided a little by the stream of indigo magic that was following me.

Now, landing. Landing’s hard.

There’s this easy level two spell to slow one’s descent. There’s a level three spell that makes it so that hitting the ground will feel like hopping on your parent’s bed on a Saturday morning. I had neither.

So, I spent the time thinking about Miss Black Ruby. That spell she had used, that was level five levitation, I’d bet my flying flank on it. And she had used it with hardly any effort. Which meant, much to my surprise, that she must be level six or seven herself. Damn.

Then I crashed into the stage at a speed that felt like mach ten.

“Well, shit,” I groaned, as the waves of pain began to flow out of me and my mind readjusted to the world around me. I didn’t have much time to wallow in self pity as a pair of dark purple hooves installed themselves a few milimetres from my nose.

“A fan, I take it?” Protagonist asked as he leaned down, his faceless mask staring at me. He stood up, giving me a tiny bit of a view of his exposed throat. “I suspect that I have done what I sought to accomplish. Perhaps it’s time to leave?”

I followed his gaze while I tried to untangle the mess that was made of my body. Behind the restless crowd—many of whom were staring at me—was a growing number of ponies in white armour, a sash of purple running over their chests. They, well over two dozen in all, were standing in two neat groups, walking forwards with measured and even steps.

“Levelists, to me!” Protagonist shouted, and instantly the leather-garbed ponies broke their line and began climbing on stage while their leader began to turn around.

I reached out, wrapping a hoof around his hind leg and stalling him. “Wait up, bud. I’m supposed to beat you up a little,” I said while delivering my nicest grin.

“You? Alone?”

“Not quite, I brought an angry filly too.”

One of the leather ponies flew by us, the force of his passing making Protagonist’s cape flutter out. Both of us traced the area he had come from.

There, standing in a half-circle of leather ponies (a convenient name) was Black Ruby, her blonde mane flowing around her as she spun on two legs and finally fell onto all fours and set her hooves out, the personification of grace as she looked to all the ponies surrounding her in turn, then to me. “Wedgie, take care of these weaklings, I’ll take out the boss.”

“I think not,” Protagonist said, his eloquent voice replaced with that of a simple, yet wise, stallion. “Good bye. I trust you have enjoyed your evening. My ponies here will take care of your... departure.”

The hoof mine was wrapped around disappeared and where once the spokespony stood was now only a cloud of tiny dust-like sprinkles.

He’d teleported. No incantations, no recitals, no massive dose of magic. Just simple point-A to point-B teleportation. I stood there, staring blankly at where he had been while his afterimage faded from view.

Then Black Ruby screamed, igniting the crowd of ponies until the final spark that panic needed to ignite burst into the fold.

I spun around and onto my hooves, noticing that three of the leather ponies were barreling towards me.

Well, shit.

Least, I thought it was going to get shitty. Then something rather strange happened. They began slowing down. The screams became hollow and stretched as if I was hearing them through a long, long tin can. Even my body was unresponsive, every motion I made long and forced, as if the world had turned to molasses for everypony. Everypony except Black Ruby.

One of the leather ponies bucked at her, his legs going just below her chin at a speed that would have knocked out a grown minotaur. She bent her head back and avoided it, as if she were merely trotting by and not in any danger; then the mare spun around her hooves, pirouetted in a tight circle and jammed her forehoof into his muzzle.

His back bent, and a slow-motion omph escaped his mouth, along with a jet of spittle.

Black Ruby turned and looked past me, eyes glinting with fervor as she dove forwards and galloped across the stage, the sound of her dull hoof-strikes not reaching me til seconds after the fact.

To my left, one of Protagonist's henchponies was rearing up on his hind hooves, his eyes fixed with firm determination while the goon in front of me got ready to tackle yours truly into oblivion.

Ruby jumped through the air, landed on her forehooves and tucked into a roll that sent her flying past me, blonde mane flowing past the tip of my muzzle. It smelled like strawberries.

She twisted around mid-roll, her left forehoof whipping out and connecting with the charging henchpony’s chin. I saw the wave of impact travel through his face and his eyes roll up into his forehead before she delivered another blow, this one to the side of his skull.

Righting herself, Black Ruby trotted to my side, then turned to show me her back. I stared at her as she bent forwards with her rear sticking in the air, the hem of her short skirt moving up slightly as her hindlegs lifted from the ground.

I swallowed hard in slow motion.

Her hooves cut the air beside my face and twisted around, both of them glowing a deep indigo before smashing into the side of the bucking leather pony with an audible crack. He flew away, smoking as his legs flailed around and he tumbled across the stage and off the side.

I saw her legs fold back and (don’t judge me) managed to catch sight of her bare flank: a flank which proudly displayed a cutie mark that resembled a stop-watch over a sideways figure-eight. ( Which is called a lemniscate, which also sounds awesome. )

Time snapped back, like a bungee cord that tried to bounce an overweight stallion.

The crowd moved once more, writhing about while the braver ponies tried to escape between the rows of approaching soldiers. Vans and police carriages were parking beyond the street, the noise of their sirens blasting us with a concussive wave that blended with the screams of panicked ponies.

Three of the leather ponies were on the ground, twitching violently as their comrade blinked and searched for Black Ruby.

They found her. Standing right beside me. I saw her gulp then set her jaw, standing up to her full height with that noble more-badasser-than-thou look. Then her horn glowed and the ponies that seemed ready to charge hesitated. “We do not have time for you, filth,” she said with all the ceremony of somepony brushing dust off one’s shoulder. Out of her horn came a long strand of magic that fluctuated and oscillated as it grew.

The magical cord snapped taut between us and the leather ponies before pushing out towards them. I saw it dig into their chests and slowly push them back with what seemed to be next to no effort.

This mare’s cray-cray.

“We should leave,” she said as she turned to me. “My magic isn’t infinite, and the City Guard is approaching. Judgement is most likely blocking off our exits.”

“Um, yeah, good idea?” I said.

She nodded, surveyed the scene, then brushed up against me, the folds of her uniform caressing my own. “Don’t pay attention to your surroundings. And, I know it’s hard, but suppress your magic.”

Pfft, hard. Hah! So, of course, I didn’t listen. My eyes were drawn to the crowd where ponies were moving about, trying to escape the police forces of the City Guard. A pair of crimson orbs caught my attention and I soon found myself staring at Happy End.

She perked an eyebrow and me and mouthed the words: “Not too shabby” before the world disappeared into an indigo sea.

When the world decided to come back, I found myself with my face jammed in a weather grate, puking out my light dinner, a warm hoof pressed itself against my back and began to rub little circles. Hey, who ever said puking your heart out on the side of a deserted alleyway with a person that’s basically a stranger was ever bad?

“It’s normal. The aftereffects of teleporting for the first time.” Black Ruby giggled and my heart almost cracked. “I remember the first time I teleported on my own; I was sick for three days.”

Starting to reveal adorkable memories of youth? Check.

“Of course, I was only three years old at the time.”

Stories that involve her working magic at an age when I still thought that eating my own boogers was cool and that girls really did have cooties. Check. Double check for the little fact that I still can’t pull that kind of stunt off today. “That was, um, interesting, back there.”

“Indeed, it was. And I think we might have stalled the Protagonist there. But he’ll be back.” She stared up and away, her eyes glazing over before they sharpened and focused on me. “Thanks for that, Wedgie. I appreciate the help.”

Even though all I did was cause a distraction by being a bumbling idiot? Sure, no problem! “Hehe, anytime?”

“Now, about lunch... I’ll hold you to it, you know,” she said before winking.

Yes.

I mean.

Hot damn, yes!

Author's Note:

Edited by:
]The Misfits

Was that saucy scene saucy enough? I really hope it is. Tried to get the guys to help me, but they refused. Buggers.

So, that’s the end of that chapter. Next chapter will have 100% less butt.

Short skirts!
Ravens D. Dagger

Comments

[Web of Hope]

Sorry there boyo.

Next chapter title: Explosions

[Lucky424]

Oh... so she's not shcizo... he really did offer her lunch... and I guess it was something to do with her talent how she knew in advance.

But she's still absolutely crazy.

[Taliesin of the Forest]

But what if we want MOAR butt?

[RavensDagger]

3236531
Then you'll have to wait!

3236300

Would you be all there if you couln't remember what happened when and with who at any given time? Or, maybe it's more like: You remember everything that happened and that's going to happen from multiple timelines at the same time.... Messy.

[Lucky424]

3236615 So... her special talent is similar to the ability of the Archanan from MiB3?

That's... pretty cool, actually.

[the other sans]

Well... wait. What is our dear protagonists cutie mark? I don't think you mentioned about it. Maybe he has the ability to SEE ALL?!

...

Hmm... Nah.

[Reggie the Griffon]

Finally somthing went mildly well for him.

~Reggie

[Brony Pony]

Hah, Protagonist confrontation, yes!

[Allonsbro]

*sees title of chapter 7*
Is the next one going to be called "Explosions"?

[RavensDagger]

3251834

Um, nope? Not too familiar with her. She's the crazy one, right? (Although, most artists in recent history have been crazy.)