• Published 14th Sep 2013
  • 6,648 Views, 493 Comments

Equestria's first warp drive - CCC

The Enterprise pays a visit to Equestria. Luna decides to go and see what this new thing in the night sky is.

  • ...


“I don't care how you do it, Frem,” yelled Pog into his communicator, “if we don't get warp now and I mean now we're all going to be serving the Collective! For free! Try inverting the polarity of something, that always seems to work.”

There was silence for a moment, and then Frem asked from Engineering, “You want me to connect the power up backwards? How would that help?”

“How should I know, I'm not an engin-”

Pog caught sight of a reflection in the control panel in front of him; a reflection of a humanoid shape, one arm out stretched. He turned around, just in time for the assimilation tubules to strike him in the neck.

“Resistance is futile.” the drone assured him, as he collapsed on the bridge.

* * *

An air vent rested in the wall. Some force took hold of the screws holding it in, and turned them, one by one. The vent fell to the ground with a clatter, revealing what appeared to be a small white blank flank alicorn filly.

Red Dawn flew down to ground level, and walked out towards the door. Since it was not locked, it opened immediately. She grinned and stepped out, her escape now securely in her chitinous hooves; within ten minutes, no-one would be able to associate her in any way with a certain escaping buffalo identity...

“Hello. Who are you?”

She'd forgotten about the little dragon, still waiting outside Frem's room.

“Um, I'm...” think quick, there are only three genuine alicorns, everyone knows Celestia, everyone knows that Luna is dark, that only leaves... “Princess Cadence?”

Spike frowned. “Twilight's old foalsitter?” he asked. “No, you're not.”

He would be the only dragon in the world to be on first-name terms with the real thing, wouldn't he? Just my luck...

Dawn sighed. “No.” she admitted. “But I like to pretend. I'd be a pretty princess in a pretty castle and... um...” what do pony foals do? I bet it's not the same as changeling larvae... “um... play with my pretty pony dolls all day long?”

She grinned, putting every ounce of innocence and guile that she could find into that facial expression.

Spike looked sceptical. “And what are you doing here?” he asked.

“Oh!” said Dawn. Good, an easy one. I can even tell the truth – at least, part of the truth. “There was this thing, like a diamond dog but shaved, and he shot me with this dart thing, and then I was suddenly in here, and I had to crawl through the air ducts, and now I can't find the exit and I just want to go home and I miss my mommy!”

She burst into well-practiced tears.

Spike walked hesitantly towards her, and patted her gingerly on the head. “There, there.” he said, nervously. “I need to find the exit, too. I'm just waiting for some friends, and then we'll all look for the way back home together, okay?”

*sniff* “Okay.” whimpered Red Dawn. More than anything else, she found herself wishing for somewhere nice and unobserved, to switch to a less confining disguise; magic shouldn't be uncomfortable to wear, but this filly form was definitely several sizes too small...

* * *




Again, it was on the third clang that the grating flew from the wall.

“What's in this one?” asked Sweetie Belle.

“Dunno.” said Applebloom. “Lotta chairs, some windows – hey it's the middle o' the night, Ah can see some stars out there.”

“Can we get out of this stupid air duct now?” asked Scootaloo, sounding more than a little annoyed.

“Sure, Ah don' see why not.” said Applebloom. “If we gotta go back, we can push one o' them chairs under the vent(1). C'mon, let's go rondey-voo Spike.” She hopped out, dropping to the floor with a solid thump.

“It's rendezvous with.” said Sweetie Belle, landing more quietly. “We're rendezvousing with Spike, not rendezvousing him.”

Applebloom gave Sweetie a suspicious glance. “Y'said it meant the same as 'meet'.” she said.

With a buzzing of tiny wings, Scootaloo lowered herself to ground level. “Oh, at last!” she said.

“Yes,” said Sweetie Belle, “it does. We're going to meet with Spike.”

“I'd just started getting a cramp in my left wing!” said Scootaloo.

“We're gonna meet Spike.” said Applebloom. “So we're gonna rondey-voo Spike.”

Sweetie Belle sighed.

“Do you girls have any idea how good it is to be able to stretch again?” asked Scootaloo. “That vent was way too tight!”

“Rendezvous isn't that sort of verb!” insisted Sweetie Belle. “It's, well, okay, technically it's a noun, taken from Fancy...”

“Ah could speak Fancy once.” pointed out Applebloom. “Ah bet Ah'd know how ta' rondey-voo Spike properly!”

* * *

“Thank you, Captain. That information will come in very useful later, I'm sure.” said Twilight. “But I think it's best if we stopped here.”

“Really?” asked Captain Anderson. He and Jorge had been taking alternating half-hour shifts reading to these mares from the publically accessible computer files for several hours now.

“Yes, really.” said Twilight. “I know I'm starting to find it harder to concentrate; and right now, it's more important that we keep this spell going than hear more about Klingon-Betazoid relations. And I'm the Element of Magic; I think some of my friends must be getting a bit tired.”

Behind the glow that filled her eyes, Twilight glanced surreptitiously at Rarity, on her left; and then at Dash, on her right. Both were staring at the rainbow trail outside the forward observation port with single-minded intensity, as if the combined intensity of their gazes could somehow shorten the length of that pathway.

“...or maybe not.” Twilight conceded.

She didn't notice, behind her, Fluttershy trying to conceal a tiny yawn.

(1) They couldn't, as it happens; the chairs in a Ferengi forward observation deck are bolted to the ground. The last thing one wants in a spaceship that's making sudden turns is loose furniture flying around.