- Member Since 13th Jan, 2013
- offline last seen 2 hours ago
Futile Task
I'm just a simple writer sharing his hobby with the world, hope you all enjoy.
Futile Task
Joined 13th Jan, 2013 ·
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Futile Task · 4.6k words · 156 views
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i like it so far
Bit of an overused Cover Art, just so you know.Ah you changed it, very nice.
The moral implications here........ehhhhhh.
I guess the big question is that will Twilight still be the same if she recovers those memories, because otherwise this might as well have been an OC story so as not to raise that issue.
Still, it's an interesting idea and I hope to see more soon.
well...
a nice story so far, have a lot of potential as a story
3198292 I agree, the only thing I could think while reading this was: if she would lose her current memories this is completely unethical to even consider
....
Meaning that if she would simply get extra memories this would be... questionable as if SHE loves the princesses she would not need those memories and if the memories would replace her own, well then it would just be downright evil
Wonder how the author is planning to move this story along .. so far I see Luna and Celestia as sort of... Evil.. ish manipulating and shaping Twilight live after live for their own happiness seems.. questionable..
Nice. Immortal love causing continual reincarnations is a nice touch. I look forward to how this could turn out. Twilight, you know you want those memories. Think of what you might already know that you can remember once more.
If you dont do more then I will do somthing
3198513>>3198292
No she will not lose her current memories, but gaining her old ones back will change her a bit, but not much.
3198705
Cant sadly, my old computer does not have the current files for my other stories, so I wont be able to work on them till next week.
Seems very interesting so far. I really wonder what would happen if Twilight said she didn't need those memories, and that she'd be there for the princesses anyway.
3202257
You'll just have to wait and see.
oh looks really interesting so far....
I wish I could get past the total lack of editing to read more of this.
An interesting premise. I look forward to the rest of it. However, I think I noticed a small plot hole; very minor. When Luna walked in, she seemed to recognize Twilight Andromeda for who she was, but would have been sealed away on the moon when Twilight's grandmother was alive. If you're saying that she sorta recognized her, but had never seen that particular incarnation, then why didn't she treat Twilight the same way when she came back from her imprisonment as Nightmare Moon? Just some food for thought.
OK, seriously, the ending of this about Luna breaking into tears seemed to have come out of nowhere. Sure, it wouldn't that hard to imagine it happening, but in the story it just up and happens! A small hint, maybe Twilight noticing something was off, well, something more than the 'elephant' that is explained before she leaves, I mean come on! At least make it more engaging, maybe more 'visible' sadness as it were, or something! I can tell my stories are probably not much better, but I haven't written a serious story in three fucking years, so it's different NOW.
On a side note (if you're still reading), if this is a somewhat older work, then it's understandable, although I will admit that until I can fix my stories, I'm gonna feel like an idiot for the rest of my life. Not saying that you - the writer of this story - is exactly like me, but it gives you something to work off of. Then again, I am often looked at as if I'm a story nazi when all I really do is open my heart and then let it bleed out on others - over the internet.
Goodness I'm a sad person!
Still! The idea will keep me reading! I quite like it as it is, just... yeah, I already wrote about that. Was that a bit much? (ignore rambling)
Im sorry.
I like this idea, I really do. But the writing is borderline atrocious; beyond that, the introduction was hasty and painful. This needs serious polishing.
4443193 the ending needs a rewrite not just polishing its very rushed near the end of this chapter
after reading your blog i desided to take a look at the story. if you wish i can tell you my thoughts on the story as i go along.
idea for you insted of pulling this story down to rewrite it maybe you could just put the rewrite up as a different story like The Princess Consort ReWritten! :P just an idea. ^_^
1st chapter thoughts: intresting idea feels a bit rushed for the start not the most horrible start of a story i have read. can see why you may wish to start again though.
What happend to chapter two I rember a chapter two
8124569
I'm Re-writing the story, though if you still want to read the original, I will be posting the entire story on google docs sometime soon.
8125232 oh well if you could send me the link and please keep the part with blueblood
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On the Link, soon, as for Blueblood, we'll see.
8127669 I would also like to read the original
Whoo! It's back!
I remember being really, really disturbed over how reincarnated-Twilight, Luna, and Celestia had acted in the original, and if I remember correctly the really disturbing reveal took a while to come out. I like that they apparently don't actually know (did Celestia and Luna know in the original? I don't remember). I hope they don't actually know. Hm... I think it's likely that they don't. Celestia doesn't really have a reason to object to forcing the spell on Twilight like this if she knows what it did and has been lying to ponies about it, then tossing their souls into Limbo for the past few thousand years.
Hm... do all the Twilight replacements have cutie marks in magical areas? Do any of the others have a talent for magic itself, or our Twilight's level of power & potential?
So, was Umbranox born to Sombra the tyrant, or did he become so later in his life? After she was replaced with Mrs. Fell Shadow (mind if I call Twilight the first that? It's a little awkward to keep saying her name and trying to separate her from our Twilight)? Because she was replaced with Fell Shadow? Did he pick up dark magic to try to get her back? She interests me. Oh, minor typo with her name in the last sentence--you call her "Unbranox".
But that's what you're missing, Luna... if you even care. Twilight's afraid of disappearing. You can't give anything to somepony who doesn't exist anymore.
You know, dying is pretty easy. People are willing to die for things they believe in all the time. There's fear, but it ultimately isn't the worst possible thing, particularly if you believe in an afterlife. But being erased? Having your identity consumed and replaced by another? That puts death to shame. I could theoretically see Twilight willing to sacrifice herself to give love back to her Princess and to her friend (1000+ years without romance is pretty depressing), but the fear of not being Twilight Sparkle anymore is a lot more frightening.
I'll be honest, I think I would only be interested in this if Luna's actions lead to a massive rift between her and Celestia, and Celestia actually attempts to help get the current Twilight back. If Celestia just goes along with it and says "Well, Twilight's gone, but at least I have my lover back," I feel like I would quickly lose interest in this new plot line.
Where is the original chapter plz
8128066
Flip that on it’s head, and you got the plot.
To be honest i thought this would be another generic twilestia (or whatever the other shipping names are) love story that seems to be everywhere. Im glad to say its not. While i will admit i like the twilestia pairings (and MOST other pairings) i get a tad sick of the dynamic and how it goes mainly because as said earlier its generic. While reading it was evident from about half way through chapter 1 that this was not a generic and after reading 2 and 3 i will say i am excited for chapter 4 and anymore chapters that come after 3 so keep up the good work *hits book mark*
I am thoroughly enjoying this so far, I like how much darker it is now and more of an impact from the horrors going on.
Ps. I think celestia fits within the context of the story. Also gotta ask was she stepping a little into a nightmare with the flame hair or was that more of symbol of her passion
8820362
It’s actually connected to what happened after Luna was banished, but more will be revealed in the next chapter.
8855403
Mwuhahahahahahahahaha!!! My plans are coming to frution!!!
8855403
I second that.
"More will be revealed on how Spike knew Twilight was not Twilight, and as to Embers comment about clutch killer, that will also be revealed latter."
-I like and can somewhat understand that idea, in an unexplainable way.-
"The bit with Celestia comes from my own personal theory about our lovely solar princess, involving both how powerful she is as well as her Daybreaker form we were introduced to in A Royal Problem, for I don’t think that is the first time Celestia has dealt with that particular beast."
-I agree that Daybreaker has probably reared her face in the past, and the full might of the sun hammering down would glass all that it touched leaving a permanent scar.-
"Yes, Majesty is Twilight’s daughter, and as implied, she has been her child through many life times, as can happen in this verse."
-That is a good idea, I like it though, it seems like it would become redundant: same story same people same roles different era.-
-I LOVE THIS STORY PLEASE CONTINUE!!!-
8857308
Well while it is the same people, they are also not the same people, as the only real thing that is the same is the soul, the personalities they have are often very different from who they were before, and who they will be in the next life.
I wonder why I forgot to track this...
Anyway; update please. This is a very interesting verse, I wanna know more!
any idea when we can expect an update and new chapter?
Hope this is still being updated. It's really good.
Yes! An update. We can postpone the coffin dance.
I rather like this alteration. It bothered me that both of them would be obsessed to the point of being willing to see lives destroyed (or to burn the whole world, as Celestia stated) just to have their non-immortal love back. One I could see, but it stretched it for me that both would be that willing to harm ponies. An immortal should be more capable of waiting for them to be reborn naturally, in my opinion. And I agree that Luna, both with the suddenness of the reveal, and with how much more the consequences matter to her, especially with this wrinkle you've thrown in to the mechanics of dreaming, definitely should not be willing to accept what has been done.
Additionally, I believe that in canon (I never actually saw the episode), Luna held both Honesty and Loyalty during the fight with Discord, so her dream responsibilities, and her nature as embodied by the Elements she once held, would make what is happening anathema to her. Maybe she'd be able to accept it at some point if it were still allowing the displaced souls to be reborn properly, but as is, no way.
Pretty good story so far keep up the great work can't wait to read more
Small edit nitpick:
in Sombra's journal should be:
The changeling willingly did something below its dignity... it didn't eat it. ;) Looking forward to the next chapter.
Oh cool I thought this was big dead. And with better characterization (IMO) too!
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Add to that the fact that in this latest case, Luna was the one who facilitated the theft, and did it forcibly, against Twilight's wishes, and there'd be a lot of guilt there.
Frick. I read it all in one night. I want more!
You could use more description in your work to add length and immersion. How do the characters feel? Describe the physical symptoms of emotion. Describe the environment. (Example the court room is a white void with the default dark oak witness stand and generic tables.) Now don’t spend a paragraph describing the table unless its a very important table.
Good story idea though!
Luna's title and position kind of put her in a position where no matter how you slice it she and Soul Shadow are enemies. I should also note that years of abuse of the system seems to have warped Shadow's soul noticeably and the princesses can't seem to see it, possibly because of the infrequency of their meetings.
Pauper
Coup
Nice little chapter, and good to see you active again.
This threw me for almost as much of a loop as Chrysalis
*notes the uploade dates of all the chapters of this*
wow...this story has been resurrected more times then sombra...can't keep a good pony tale down i guess.
oh sh!t...ohSh!t......OH SH!T .....Ohhhh u went there...Damn!
This is great!