• Published 15th Sep 2013
  • 2,103 Views, 51 Comments

(SiC) Part 5 - Pinkie Pie the Evangelist - Brian Jacko



Pinkie Pie goes on a mission to win hearts for Jesus.

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Being Applejack Honest

Pinkie Pie was hanging upside down from an apple tree. She had her binoculars with her once more which was silly, because she was close enough to hear everything being said anyway.

Applejack rang up the purchase for the two stallions. "That'll be one hundred bits for the cases of Apple cider!" she said.

Flim took out a bag of bits and handed her the money. "Hey, Applejack," Flim said. "Sometimes we like to cheat our customers a little bit to gain more profits. Do you ever cheat your customers by any chance?"

Applejack stomped her front hoof hard against the ground and said, "Absolutley not! That would be a disgrace!"

"But why?" Flam asked. "Sometimes you have to step on a few hooves to make that extra cash."

"Because lying lips are an abomination to God!"

"You're religious?" Flim asked.

"Yes, I am. I believe that Christ died four us and that He loves us all with a love that we may never be able to fully comprehend."

"Wow," Flam said. "That's inspiring. Maybe what we have been doing has been wrong all along. How can we learn more about your faith?"

Applejack bent low and picked up a Bible and pushed it over across the counter. "Here's everythin' ya need to know. If ya have any questions or are confused 'bout a certain passage, Twilight Sparkle likes to help clear up any misunderstandin's. She studies this book a lot."

"We may take advantage of that offer, thanks!" Flim said. "How much do we owe you for the Bible?"

"It's free," she said. "I always keep a few extra copies in case somepony may want one."

"Thanks! Flam said. "We'll see you around in the future." Flam and his brother, Flim, waved good bye and began to walk away with their cases of Applejack's special home made apple cider and their new Bible.

"Yer welcome and may God bless ya'll!" Applejack said as she waved good bye with her front hoof.

"That's it!" Pinkie Pie said in sudden excitement. She was so excited that she accidently fell out of the tree. She picked herself up and said, "So I just have to be honest with what I say and ponies will come to know Jesus. How could I be so blind!"

"What in tar-nations are ya doin' on my farm? And why are ya wearin' some kind of black skin tight spy suit? Ya weren't spyin' on me and tryin' to keep tabs on how I try to represent Christ to other ponies, are ya?"

"I was just uh," Pinkie Pie stumbled with her words for a moment. "I was just bird watching and I needed to wear this suit so that I don't distract them or scare them away!"

Applejack stared at her with a rather angry glare for a moment. She then perked up and said, "Oh! That makes sense I guess. Carry on!" Applejack trotted away and began to whistle a bluegrass tune.

Pinkie Pie wiped the sweat off of her forehead with her front leg. "Whew!" she said. "That was a close one."




Pinkie Pie was back at Sugar Cube Corner dealing with a customer.

"So are you are absolutely positive that you can bake five hundred cupcakes for me in just one day, all by yourself?" a stallion wearing a top hat asked.

"Yup! Yup! Yup!" the cheerful pony said as she bounced up and down in place. "I promise because God loves honesty and God loves Applejack too! She's the most honest and hard working pony in all of Equestria! I can do this task all by myself!"

"You're bringing God into this? I don't even believe in God, but I swear, if you can bake five hundred cupcakes for my business party, I will convert to your faith on the spot! I think you're biting off way more than you can chew here."

"That's funny," Pinkie Pie said. "My friend Fluttershy says that line a lot too."

"Well, let's see if you can pull this off. It would take a miracle for you to make this all happen."

"My word is my word and I need not say anymore!" she said.

"I'll see you tomorrow then," the stallion said as he tipped his hat to her.

"Okie dokie lokie!" Pinkie Pie said as she watched him walk out the door. "I'm going to win my first heart for Jesus today!" Pinkie Pie took out some bowls and pans and began to hum a little tune. "Cupcakes, so sweet and tasty. Cupcakes don't be too hasty..."



The next day the stallion came back in. He looked around, but saw nopony around. He rang the little bell on the counter several times with his front hoof impaitnetly.

Pinkie Pie, who was curled up in a ball on the floor jolted up from her nap. She poked her head above the counter and said, "I'll be right with you!" Pinkie Pie zipped over to the oven and opened it up. She put on some oven mitts and took her batch of cupcakes out. They were burnt to a crisp and many more cupcakes had to be decorated with icing.

"So where are my five hundred cupcakes that I ordered?" the stallion asked.

"I'm....I'm.....I'm...just having some technical difficulty here. Be right there." Pinkie Pie took some icing and put it sloppily over her freshly burnt batch of cupcakes. She brought over the many cupcakes that she spent all night and day baking.

The customer looked at the newest batch of cupcakes and said, "Did you even bother to put any kind of work into decorating these? These cupcakes are burnt to a crisp as well!"

"Sorry about that!" Pinkie Pie said.

"Is this all you have? This doesn't look like five hundred cupcakes to me."

Pinkie Pie nervously dragged her front hoof across the floor and looked down. "I was only able to make about three hundred, but it still counts because I tried right? Did I win your heart for Jesus?"

"Hah! What a crock! I knew you couldn't do it. Where's your manager?" he asked.

The second he asked that question, Mister Cake came through the door and asked, "Did you call for me? I am the manager here. What may I help you with sir?"

"I placed an order for five hundred cupcakes and your lazy, lying, no good employee promised that she would have them baked all in one day. Look at these cupcakes! Many of them are not properly decorated or are burnt. She wasn't even able to meet the quantity that I had ordered. Do you seriously call this a quality bakery?"

Mister Cake gasped and said, "I'm so terribly sorry sir! Please, whatever cupcakes came out well are yours to take free of charge. Please do come back again. I apologize for the inconvenience."

"I don't know if I'll be coming back, but I'll gladly take the cupcakes for free. Thanks." The stallion turned to Pinkie Pie and said, "Way to represent your God, dummy. I think it would be best to actually live up to your word next time."

Mister Cake watched the pony walk out the door with his treats. He picked up a rolling pin and batted it against his other hoof as he looked down at Pinkie Pie. He looked as if he were full of judgment and wrath. "Pinkie Pie, did you seriously accept an order for five hundred cupcakes to be made in one day, all by yourself?"

"Yes," Pinkie Pie said glumly.

"Why would you make such an absurd promise? Why did that customer say something about God?" he asked.

"Because I'm on a mission to change pony's hearts for the Lord," she admitted.

Mister Cake face hoofed and said, "That's really wonderful, Pinkie, but going around and making ridiculous promises and then failing to keep them is a sure way to keep ponies from wanting to know about the Bible. Just keep that in mind. If anything like this happens again, then there are going to be some major consequences, Pinkie Pie." Mister Cake shook his head several times in disbelief and then walked away. He had other important matters to take care of.

Pinkie Pie stared down at the counter and then began to bang her head against it a few times. Every time she picked he head back up she would say a few words. "Why Can't..." *BANG* "I just...* *BANG* "Do something right for once!" *BANG* "Ouch! That really hurt!" Pinkie Pie rubbed her forehead with her front hoof after that last head bang. Pinkie Pie sighed once more and began cleaning up the mess that she had made in her desperate attempt to bake so many cupcakes. Something inside her spirit was telling her to stop this crazy crusade of trying to win hearts, but Pinkie Pie blocked it all out.