The Wandering Physicist Adventures

by WanderingPhysicist

137 Short Scenes About Hearts and Hooves Day

Main Characters: So many couples!
Cameos: Only a few hoofing it

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James and Del eat dinner together while Rei is out with Inkie. The stallion clears his plate and pours the changeling another glass of juice.

‘Thank you, daddy.’

‘No prob, Del.’ The stallion sits back down. ‘Now, Del it is almost Hearts and Hooves Day, and your sister and I both have dates. If you don’t want to stay here alone, I think Apple Bloom will also be alone and you can visit her. Or I can ask Daring to watch you.’

Del smiles. ‘It’s okay, daddy. Big sister told me all about the holiday and said she will be visiting. She wants to go to dinner.’

James stares at his daughter in shock.

‘I’m joking! But can she come over if she wants?’

The stallions sighs, ‘As long as Ponville ends the night with equal or more ponies than when it started, it is fine.’

‘Thank you!’ Del smiles.

‘Anyway, do you have a special somepony you are looking forward to get a card from?’

Del frowns. ‘I do not... But can I give cards to all of my friends?’

James looks upset. ‘Are you just singling them out and not giving them to the whole class?’

‘But that includes the rude, loud pink one.’

‘It is very mean to exclude others from a celebration. Do you want them to exclude you because you weren’t nice to them?’

‘No...’

‘Do you want them to feel bad for being left out?’

‘No...’

‘Do you want them thinking that nopony loves them?’

‘N-’

‘...and have them be lonely for three hundred long years until a marvelous purple unicorn trots into their life and for some miraculous reason falls in love with them thus making them cry with happiness every night?’

Del gets up and hugs her father. ‘I will make cards for everypony, but I will make extra special cards for my friends.’

‘Good girl, Del.’

The changeling sighs and goes to get the art supplies to make her cards.

The next morning. Bon Bon yawns as she enters her shop for some pre-dawn preparation. She is always extra busy with ponies who forgot to get their special somepony a Hearts and Hooves Day gift, and she wants to make sure she has plenty of stock. The confectioner turns on the light to her kitchen and is shocked to find a life-sized chocolate Lyra waiting for her. She giggles, thinking her wife stayed up all night working on the gift, until she notices a small straw sticking from the statue’s mouth.

‘Lyra, did you dip yourself in chocolate again?’

‘Maybe,’ the statue mumbles.

‘Well, you know that the chocolate won’t melt that easily.’ She trots over to her trapped wife. ‘That means I can take as long as I want to eat you up.’

Bon Bon runs her tongue up Lyra’s chocolate-covered horn, getting the whole unicorn to shake. The confectioner laughs and starts going to work, stopping only to give a chocolate-coated cutie mark a kiss.

James and Del, in her pegasus disguise, come downstairs to The Power Block. At the counter, Lucas and Mimi nuzzle each other. Del gives them an upset look before kissing her dad on the cheek and heading to school.

‘Good morning, Boss,’ Lucas greets.

Mimi bows. ‘Mr Wanderer.’

‘Big plans tonight?’ James asks. ‘Or just average plans? Not too big. Not too small. Just enough to get the job done.’

Mimi giggles at the joke while Lucas blushes from embarrassment.

‘We’re just going to have a night in,’ Mimi answers. ‘We’ll see where that leads.’

‘Just don’t spend the whole night draining his love.’ James goes to the door. ‘Though, that would mean I only have to pay one of you.’

‘Unless you end up having to give me maternity leave instead,’ Mimi counters.

‘Actually, I wouldn’t mind that. I’m curious if you could mix a changeling and a unicorn.’

‘As am I, not that Lucas doesn’t try his hardest.’

‘Boss! Don’t you have somewhere to be?’ Lucas shouts before he gets too embarrassed.

James and Mimi laugh. The stallion waves and leaves the couple with the store. James goes across the street to Neighponese Imports.

‘Ohayo, sexy-kun,’ Daring greets.

‘I am going to take away your boss’ computer until she orders you to stop calling me that.’

‘Oh, you like it. What brings you here?’

‘Del is going to be alone tonight. Can you pop in on her?’

‘No prob! I’ll wait in your room for you to arrive, too.’

James groans and looks around. ‘Aren’t you supposed to have an assistant? I think I’d rather ask Flitter...’

‘Good luck. She is currently going through all of our mane and coat products for her date later.’ Daring looks around and whispers. ‘Is tonight the night?’

James leaves. ‘See ya, Daring. Don’t do anything stupid later.’

‘You can tell me! I won’t tell anypony!’

Flitter trots out of the back with two bottles in her wings. ‘Do you think he will like Hot Spring Delight or Super Sushi Surprise better?’

The annual Hearts and Hooves Day party at the Ponyville Schoolhouse is in full swing. Cheerilee and her students play games and exchange friendly cards. Del eats an entire bowl of candy, having gotten distracted from giving out her cards. Featherweight gives Scootaloo a card, earning the colt a kiss in return. Diamond Tiara, trying to ignore the class by sitting in the back, looks over her tablet and shoots the pegasus filly a quick glare. Truffle Shuffle taps Del on the back.

The filly jumps and almost drops the candy. ‘Did you want some too? Sorry.’

‘Um, sure. Thanks. Um, here.’

The colt gives Del a card. She looks at it and smiles.

‘Thank you. You’re sweet. Oh!’ Del gets out a card and gives it to Truffle. ‘Here you go too.’

‘Thank you, Del. This is really...’

‘Here, Twist. One for you too.’ Del says as she gives the other filly a card.

‘Thankth! You’re thweet!’ Twist replies, hugging the pegasus.

A light pink unicorn filly with a flower cutie mark sees all of the cards being given and turns away. She is about to storm off, but Del cuts her off and gives her a card too.

‘I made cards for everpony since all of you are my friends,’ Del tells the unicorn.

‘Thank you, Del,’ Toostie Flute replies.

Del smiles and goes back to giving out cards. Truffle and Tootsie sigh and watch the filly leave. Sweetie Belle storms past, grumbling. Back where she came from, Pipsqueak limps toward where Cheerilee and some students are playing.

‘Just have confidence. Confidence...’ the colt mumbles to himself. He takes a deep breath and taps Dinky on the shoulder.

‘Oh. Hey, Pip. What’s up?’

‘Well, uh, I just want to, uh...’ The colt tries rubbing the back of his head, but he winces and cannot raise his hoof above his knee.

‘Are you okay? You have a pretty big bruise on your leg.’

Pipsqueak looks back and gets a glare from Sweetie Belle. ‘I’m fine. Just slept on it wrong.’

‘Okay. What were you going to ask me?’

‘I was just wondering if you would, um...’

‘Hey, would you like to come over and hang out tonight?’

‘Really?’ Pipsqueaks voice cracks, getting laughs from the foals in earshot.

‘Mommy is finally going on a date for the first time in forever, and my sister will be out too.’

Pipsqueak tries answering, but all he can do is a nervous squeak. An older brown colt pushes the smaller one forward.

‘I’d love to!’ Pip blurts out.

‘Great! Come over around three.’

Pipsqueek nods and trots away. ‘Thanks, Lickety Split.’

‘Don’t freak out so much,’ the older colt advises. ‘Just be yourself.’

‘Don’t worry. I have plenty of help.’ Pipsqueak goes back to his desk and slips out a mobile. ‘Hey, Mr Stormy? I was able to get a date. Can we meet later?’

The colt looks up when Del shoves a card in his face. He takes it, and the filly moves on. She checks her bag. There is one card left. She snorts and takes it out.

‘Here,’ Del grunts as she holds the card in front of the recipient.

‘Ugh! You are blocking my screen,’ Diamond Tiara complains.

‘Just take the card.’

‘Whatever, weirdo.’

Del snorts and turns away. Diamond Tiara groans and goes back to her tablet.

Bon Bon takes a break from her customers. Thanks to her snacking through the day, Lyra’s muzzle, tail and the tip of her horn are free.

‘This was your best gift yet,’ Bon Bon says, wiping her mouth.

‘Feels good to move my tail again,’ Lyra replies.

Bon Bon licks her teeth. ‘So much chocolate. Colgate is going to kill me when I see her next.’

‘Oo! Invite her to help!’

The confectioner hits her wife, cracking the chocolate on Lyra’s head. ‘Are you proposing what I think you are proposing just because she is my ex?’

‘And a human too!’ Lyra grins. ‘I have some inside information.’

‘So... You are proposing what I think you are proposing?’

‘Yep!’

‘Pervert! That is worse than cutting your sandwich diagonally!’

‘What do you mean? I am just asking for you to get another mare to help you lick me all over. … OH! I didn’t mean it like that.’

‘How did you mean it?’

‘… … … I love you?’

Bon Bon groans and goes back to work.

Scootaloo flits out of the schoolhouse. Rumble watches her fly away before Silver Spoon drags the colt away. The rest of the Cutie Mark Crusaders follow after their friend.

‘I can’t believe she has a date!’ Sweetie complains. ‘I mean, her!’ There is no response. ‘Apple Bloom!’

The filly looks around and slips a piece of paper into her bow. ‘Sorry. What?’

Sweetie groans. ‘Ugh! Never mind. If you want to do something later, give me a call.’

The two friends split up. Scootaloo flies around the school and catches up to Diamond Tiara heading out the back.

‘We still on for tonight?’ the pegasus asks.

‘After your shameless flirting with Featherweight?’ Diamond scoffs. ‘I thought you had forgotten about me.’

‘Well, he did give me a nice card, and he is really sweet.’

‘I can be sweet too! Why else would I use cherry mouthwash and lavender body wash?’

‘I don’t mean that kind of sweet. Geez! Did you even thank Del for the card? Everypony else did.’

‘Oh, good. She gave one to everypony. It would have been weird if she really liked me like that.’

‘Ya know, I don’t really feel like having a sleepover anymore.’

Diamond takes a deep breath and groans. ‘I’m sorry. I’ll be nicer.’

‘Can I pick the pizza we order tonight?’

Diamond groans even louder. ‘Fine!’

Scootaloo laughs. ‘Come on. Let’s get my stuff, and we can start our sleepover.’

Diamond sighs and follows her friend away.

Stormy comes out of the washroom with his mane styled. Rarity whistles at the passing stallion.

‘I didn’t know Trixie was in town again so soon,’ the mare says.

‘We’re meeting on Skype.’ Stormy looks his adopted sister over. ‘Shouldn’t you be getting ready?’

‘Ready for what?’

‘You’re not going out?’

Rarity sighs. ‘I’m getting tired playing the same games again and again. No more playing the field!’ She laughs. ‘I mean, it is not like the perfect stallion is going to trot through the door this very instant.’

The front door opens. Rarity gasps and gallops to greet the guest. Her hopes are instantly dashed.

‘Ahoy, fair maiden,’ Pipsqueak greets. ‘Is Master Stormy about?’

‘Back here!’ Stormy calls. ‘I’ll get you looking great for your special somepony.’

Rarity groans. ‘I’m going upstairs to a bath and a good book. Hmpf!’

The unicorn storms away, leaving the males to tend to their grooming.

Rumble strains his wings as he tries to stay in the air. The young pegasus fails to retain any height and falls to the ground. His crash is cushioned as he lands on Silver Spoon. The filly grunts as she becomes a pillow.

‘Sorry,’ the colt pants, picking himself up. ‘I’m just not strong enough to carry another pony yet.’

‘It’s okay,’ Silver sighs as she lifts her goggles. ‘You did your best.’ She kisses the colt on the cheek. ‘Thank you for trying.’

Rumble blushes. ‘N-no prob. So, uh, I heard the candy shop is having a sale. Want me to get you something?’

‘Yes, please. When did you learn to treat a lady so well?’

‘My brother taught me everything I know.’

Silver laughs as she follows the colt away.

‘Y’all have a date too!’ Apple Bloom moans.

‘Eeyup,’ Big Macintosh replies as he brushes his coat.

‘And Ah have t’ stay here with Granny Smith all by mahself?’

‘Eeyup.’

‘Can Ah go stay with mah friends instead?’

‘Nope.’

‘Can Ah invite mah friends over?’

‘Nope.’

‘Does Miss Cheerilee know ya were out with Miss Carrot Top last week?’

The stallion stops his prep and sweats. ‘... Nope.’

‘Can me and mah friends camp out in the clubhouse?’ Apple Bloom grins widely.

Big Macintosh groans, knowing he has been trapped. ‘Eeyup,’ he sighs.

‘Thank ya, big brother! Ah’ll go invite everypony right away!’

Apple Bloom happily prances out of her brother’s room to call her friends. She hops on her bed and reaches for her mobile on her night stand. She notices a small box of chocolates sitting by her mobile. The filly gasps and pulls the card off right away.

‘Hang in there. Love, SCS.’

Apple Bloom smiles and sighs as she calls her friends.

Sunshine stands in the middle of Canterlot train station. The bat pony captain of the Lunar Guard is decked in the navy blues of his dress uniform. Most travelers avoid the bat pony, many worrying that something dangerous is ahoof. The train from Ponyville pulls into the station. The Lunar Guard straightens up as he stands at attention. As the passengers exit, one of them notices the warrior and shakes her head and laughs as she comes over.

‘Y’all look silly,’ Applejack laughs. She reaches out and pulls the stallion’s eyepatch off. ‘Ya don’ need t’ wear that on our date. Not t’ mention, there is somethin’ wrong with yer mane.’

The bat pony blinks his exposed eye. ‘Sorry. I was trying that “messy” style you mentioned liking on our last date. I think I am doing it wrong. All of the mares back at base keep giving me disturbingly-affectionate looks, and Prince Shining Armor ran away screaming the last time he saw me.’

Applejack laughs again. ‘It does have a bit o’ power. Come on. Ya promised t’ show me the city.’

Sunshine smiles, bows and escorts Applejack away.

Apple Bloom climbs up to the clubhouse. Sweetie Belle is already laying on the floor on top of her sleeping bag.

‘Oh. Yer here already.’

‘Didn’t want to disturb my parents being all lovey dovey,’ Sweetie moans. ‘Wanted some privacy, so I came here already.’

‘Sorry. Didn’ know ya wanted t’ be alone.’

‘Nah. It’s all good. When’s Del getting here?’

‘Should be soon.’ Apple Bloom tilts her head. ‘Why are yer hooves and bed wet?’

Sweetie’s eyes dart. ‘Uh, I dropped my bed in a puddle on my way here.’

‘Ya need help drying it out?’

The unicorn laughs nervously. ‘I’ll be fine.’

Another sleeping bag drops on the floor.

‘Sorry I’m late,’ Del apologizes. ‘I couldn't find a pen to leave a note if my sister drops by, and Rei was hogging the washroom to get ready for her date.’

Sweetie moans and meekly raises a hoof. ‘Here is to the dateless younger sister club.’

‘Yay...’ the others groan.

Daring moans and reaches for a bottle as she lays on the couch. There is a loud pounding in her head. After a moment, she realizes the pounding is coming from the door. The pegasus gets up and answers. A very angry-looking white pegasus enters the apartment.

‘Boss?’ Daring mumbles. ‘I thought you were on a date.’

‘Silence!’ Full Moon snaps. ‘Your delay has made me quite hungry. I demand you take me out.’

Daring stares back. ‘You’re the other Full Moon.’ She drunkenly grins. ‘The legal Full Moon.’

‘And you’re drunk. Just tell me where to find my sister, and I’ll be on my way.’

Full Moon groans and starts to leave. Daring tackles the exiting pegasus and shoves her bottle in her mouth. Chrysalis drops her disguise and throws the pegasus from her back.

‘Fool! Your weak booze has no effect on me!’

‘Translation: you only prefer the expensive stuff.’

‘I don’t see how that is relevant.’

Daring goes back to the couch. ‘Well, Del ain’t here. Saw her flying off to spend time with...’ She notices a small box under the changeling’s wing. ‘Who’s that for?’

Chrysalis groans. ‘My sister. My fans sent me sickening amounts of chocolate for some reason. I wanted to devour it with her.’

‘Can I have it instead?’

‘Sure,’ the queen huffs, dropping the gift on Daring. ‘It is not like I like you or anything.’

‘Sweet.’ She starts eating. ‘Hey, want my help cleaning house? I think I know another pony who always up for some action.
--------------------------------------------------

Rarity lays in her bubble bath with her book over her eyes. Opalescence bats at her owner’s tail as it hangs over the side of the tub. The pony lets out a loud snore, blowing bubbles everywhere.
--------------------------------------------------

‘No thanks.’ Full Moon resumes her disguise. ‘I just want to go back to Neighpon and wait for this dreadful holiday to be over. False and overly-dramatic declarations of love are hardly a fitting meal. If the ponies were truly sincere, they would celebrate every day instead of ritualizing...’

Daring shoves the bottle back in Full Moon’s mouth. The assaulted pushes her attacker away.

Full Moon swaggers. ‘Your attempts to get me as blitzed as you will not work for you or your sexy ass.’

‘You, me, more of this chocolate and a soft bed, now.’

‘Took you long enough to ask.’ She trot to the door, running her tail across Daring’s nose. ‘Follow me.’

Full Moon stumbles out. Daring downs the last of the chocolate and follows.

James and Twilight sit in a restaurant and enjoy their dinner together. The ponies around them glance at the couple as if they are expecting something. The couple quietly eats.

‘You know, it is a year since our first date,’ James mumbles.

‘Even more reason to celebrate,’ Twilight giggles. She pauses. ‘Is there... something you want to... ask me?’

James stares at his plate. ‘... Not just yet. I have something special planned.’

‘Oh... Okay...’ She looks down at her plate but smiles. ‘It isn’t like we don’t know the answer already.’

James smiles. ‘Yeah...’

Twilight tries to eat, but she cannot help nervously fidgeting. ‘I know I am not the type that normally thinks about this sort of thing, but I may have started making some notes on the subject.’

The stallion blushes. ‘Oh. … Got a lot of notes?’

‘N-not really. I never really thought about this sort of thing. I don’t know where to start.’

‘Well, uh, I don’t know much either, but maybe we can go back to your place and start making plans. A little preparation goes a long way.’

Twilight blushes and nods. The couple returns to eating.

‘... I know I told you this already, but you look very beautiful tonight,’ James says.

‘... Thank you.... handsome.’

The couple exchange smiles and resume their meal.

Luna magically gets the chair for Cloudchaser as they finish their private meal in Luna’s wing of the castle. The couple trots out to a balcony and sit under the stars. Lights are on in Celestia’s and Discord’s areas of the castle.

‘I’m having a wonderful night. Thank you,’ Cloudchaser says.

‘I am pleased. I wanted tonight to be special for you.’

‘You have.’

‘What would you like to do now? I will make it come true.’

‘I don’t know,’ the pegasus hems. ‘Anything with you would be nice.’

‘Hmm... How about a fly around the city? We can see all there is see and maybe find something along the way. We could even catch the pony defacing all of the statues with rubber bands.’

‘Hee, hee. That sounds fun.’

The two ponies spread their wings and prepare to take flight. Luna stops, her ears twitching.

‘You must stay here, dear sister!’ the princess shouts as she lifts off.

Cloudchaser giggles at her date as they fly away.

After their date, Rei lays on top of Inkie at her fillyfriend’s apartment. The mares coo as they nuzzle each other.

‘Inkie-chan dai suki.’

‘I love you too, Full Moon.’

Rei nuzzles close and nibbles Inkie’s ear. The larger pony squirms under the small pegasus.

‘Inkie-chan liked that.’

‘My ears are... sensitive.’

Rei grins are gives another nibble.

‘Rei, stop.’

‘Sorry... but I was thinking...’

‘That’s never good...’

‘... Since we are pre-pre-pre-pre-super pre-pre engaged, maybe we can move our relationship up a step? Not really doing ecchi things yet! Just... have some more fun...’

‘How so~ooo~~~?’ Inkie moans as Rei nibbles her ear. She pushes Rei back a bit. ‘If you are going to tease me, you have to give me a way of fighting back?’

‘Good luck. I don’t have any non-ecchi weak spots.’

‘Cutie mark?’ Inkie asks, rubbing Rei’s side.

The pegasus shakes a little. ‘Not really. I don’t seem to react like everypony else. See?’

Rei rubs a hind hoof against Inkie. Even the hard hoof gets more reaction from the mare.

‘Okay... How about the ears like me?’

Rei shakes her head.

‘Wings and feathers?’

‘I preen all the time. Nothing.’

‘Hmm....’

Inkie leans up and kisses the joint between Rei’s wing and her body. The pegasus falls forward and moans.

‘Inkie-chan wins...’

Rei cuddles on top of her fillyfriend and coos. Inkie smiles and nuzzles Rei.

Bon Bon’s shop is closed for the night. Most of the shelves are empty thanks to the last minute rush throughout the day. Bon Bon left cleaning up for the next day. In the back of the shop, Lyra struggles to move. Her head and part of her neck are free in addition to her flank and haunches. The chocolate on her legs have melted onto the ground, but she cannot bend enough to eat herself free.

‘Bon Bon?’ Lyra calls. ‘Little help?’ She bends and snaps at her legs. ‘I’d like to go home now! … I’ll cuddle you all night! … Please? … I’m sorry that I said Berry has a nice plot! Yours is way better!’

Silence fills the shop.

‘Okay, Lyra. You are on your own, in your wife’s shop and coated in chocolate. I have to use all of my skills to get out of this predicament. Human Instinct! Activate!’

Lyra lights up her horn, surrounding her in an aura. When the aura dies down, nothing happens. The unicorn stands firm as if waiting for something. After several moments, the unicorn looks down.

‘Well, sh-’

Author's Note:

TWP Timeline: One year since his first date with Twilight. One year going from just kissing to wanting to ask her to...

Story Timeline: Rei finally feels comfortable doing something slightly intimate with Inkie.

Fun fact: If I haven't said this before, 'messy' is how I describe TWP's mane style.

Fun fact: Del had to give out cards to all of her classmates (even the mean pink one) because of IRL events. When my grade school would force us to do card exchanges on this day, I consistently got less cards than everyone else despite the requirement to give cards to every student. It is my way of saying that you should treat everyone equal. It doesn't matter if they are nice to you or not, whether you are from the same area or moved from across the state, what you look like or find entertaining or who your friends are. On a day that is supposed to be about loving your fellow humans, treating someone different because they are different is the worst thing you can do.

Comments

[Djerid]

um, chapter 84 had no comment on it. for my favorite story this is unacceptable.

this was a heartwarming chapter. i quite liked the parts with del.

[MrWhatnow]

Man...you've finally collapsed my remaining hopes that Stormy x Rei would happen...oh well, Rarity x Rainbow has become my headcanon for this series and you haven't done anything to -that- at least.

[wobs23]

TWP is best story. All my attentions are belong to it. Seriously though, I love this story and pretty much everything about it. Keep up the good work.

[VedaQuila]

Sweetie moans and meekly raises a hoof. ‘Here is to the dateless younger sister club.’
Exception of AppleBloom who is married.

[bocaj518]

Anybody else thinking of a real-life sized chocolate *insert opposite gender here* statue to molest?