Fight of the Millenium.

by Madness Brony

Madness in Spandex.

It was well past noon before Spike had finished transcribing all of Twilight's notes, his belly more than a little displeased with how empty it had grown. As he rolled the parchment and sent it off to the princess with quick breath of air, he couldn't help but feel a cold wind against the back of his neck. The assistant in him told him that Twilight was right and everything would be better once the princess arrived to retrieve the book. The dragon in him, however, felt compelled to burn the offending tome to cinders so that it may never again see the glory of Celestia's Sun.

Shaking off the unsavory feeling, Spike could tell Twilight was still a bit shaken up over the previous night's incident, so he decided to prepare one of her favorite breakfasts. Donning his miniature chef's hat and apron and flicking on the waffle iron, he swiftly but precisely whipped together a batter, mixing eggs, butter, and milk with flour, baking powder, and sugar. He then folded in a bowl of fresh wild berries, careful not to crush them. Once the iron was hot enough, breakfast came together quickly. Spike quartered an apple and buttered a few slices of toast to go with the crisp-looking golden-brown waffles, which he laid out two to a plate with a pad of butter settled in the middle. He laid everything out, then, after taking a step back to admire the beautifully set table, he made his way back into the library proper to retrieve Twilight.

He found the periwinkle coated unicorn seated at her desk, a quill encased in a familiar magenta glow furiously scratching across a bit of parchment. "Hey, Twilight, breakfast is read-belch-." Spike was cut off mid sentence when a burst of green flame shot from his mouth, materializing in the form of a sealed roll of paper. He blushed and muttered a quick excuse me before handing the letter off to Twilight. In a flash, Twilight had the letter unraveled and laid out on the desk, before Spike even had a chance to close his mouth.

"To my faithful student,

I shall be arriving in Ponyville tomorrow morning at the earliest. I wish it could be sooner, but there are things that demand my immediate attention in Canterlot. A portion of the royal navy was out performing practice drills and was devastated by what the sailors are calling a "rogue wave". It appeared out of nowhere and capsized nearly a quarter of the fleet. Once this matter is resolved, I shall leave immediately to retrieve the parcel you spoke of; I dare not send anyone else. Princess Luna should pay closer attention to the items she allows to leave her library. Please, Twilight, keep the book safe until I arrive; it is far too dangerous for common citizens to be in its presence."

"This wasn't the news we were looking for, Spike". Twilight rolled the scroll back up and placed it on a shelf among countless others.

"I don't know how much longer I can keep the book contained. Even now, it's eating away at the containment magic keeping it bound. I can keep it sealed for at most another 24 hours. After that, well... I just hope Celestia can make it before noon tomorrow."

"Well, you best keep up your strength then, Twi. Come on, I just finished breakfast, and you look like you could use something to eat."

Spike pulled out a seat for Twilight and poured her a glass of apple juice fresh from AJ's farm. Taking a seat himself, he sprinkled some gem shavings over his waffles before offering the syrup to Twilight. Taking the bottle from the little dragon, Twilight looked over his handiwork with a smile on her face. "Oh, Spike. thank you so much. This all looks amazing! It's just what I needed after everything last night." Levitating a fork and knife with her magic, Twilight tucked into her breakfast with gusto. Spike took a bite of his, smiling slightly; he always felt good when he could help ease Twilight's worries and anxieties.

As Spike finished clearing the table and set the last of the dishes in the sink, he stopped dead in his tracks, his head snapping upward. It felt as if a frozen hand had gripped his chest. It was the same feeling that had awoken him last night, and it was coming from Twilight's loft. He rushed into the library to find Twilight.

"Twi, something's wrong!" He punctuated with a deep growl, looking upward.

"What is it, Spike?"

"There's something wrong with the book. I can feel it. I'm cold all over, just like last night."

Twilight could see the fear clearly in the young dragon's eyes and immediately made her way to the stairs, Spike trailing close behind. When they reached the door to the loft, she could feel it too, the same cold dread. With a flare of magic, she threw the door open and, after steeling herself, stepped through the doorway. There, sitting in its glass prison, the dark tome pulsed with black and green energy, looking every bit as sinister as it had the night before. Before Twilight could act and start feeding the case more magic to strengthen its seals, the cover blasted open, and a wave of dark magic rushed through the room, knocking both pony and dragon off their respective hooves and feet. It was all Twilight could do to manage a short scream before the wave hit her and everything went black.

****************************************

The port of Las Pegasus

A lone naval ship had finally finished being towed in and docked. It was suspected to be the sole surviving ship from the incident. As the royal navy personnel swept over the ship their searches turned up precious little. None of the life boats had been deployed, yet not a single sailor had been found thus far. There were no signs of struggle anywhere on the ship which only proved to further confuse the matter. The captain in charge of the sweep was almost ready to call off the search when he heard what sounded like quiet whimpering. He ordered his men to stop what they were doing; the sound was barely audible, but he followed it to an equipment trunk fastened to the deck below the helm. With a flourish of the wing he twisted the handle, and a terrified, pale yellow earth pony with blood on his face burst from the trunk.

It took three stallions to pin the frantic pony down and another thirty or so minutes to calm him into some form of sensibility. The pegasus captain gave him a hard stare before speaking.

"Report, sailor: what happened during the drills?"

"The ocean, it-it swelled up in the blink of an eye. Our ship was the furthest from fleet, so we had the perfect view of the massive wave devouring the other ships. The sky darkened so quickly it could have only been magic, a storm like nothing anypony had ever seen before."

"And what happened to the rest of the crew? Our records show over 200 sailors assigned to this vessel."

"Despite the storm, we only lost a handful of ponies during the initial onset, but then, then-" The sailors eyes went wild and he began struggling again. It took another hour before he was calm enough to speak coherently.

"Th-the lighting and thunder seemed to stop all at once. The wind and rain continued on, and all around us was the blackest dark you could imagine. A cold wind swept over the ship, and we saw two red lights in the sky. Everypony was transfixed on them. A strike of lightning started the panic; we saw it: n-not lights, eyes. Two g-giant red eyes. The entire face seemed to wriggle and writhe and-and that's when I heard the voice." He swallowed, hard, his eyes still frantic. "No language I had ever heard before. The voice was in my head, deep, penetrating. Ponies started throwing themselves over the side. Madness. It was sheer madness. It was all I could-I had to look away." He began to rock back and forth slightly. "I had to break away from the maddening gaze. I locked myself in the equipment trunk, smashed my head against the side as hard as I could. I just, I had to knock myself out, had to make it stop. The last thing I remember...the taste of blood in my mouth, the sinister voice in my head."

The captain sent the sailor to the nearest hospital to have his head wound treated. The entire story seemed impossible, but he knew the Princess would want to hear about it. He summoned a unicorn scribe and began detailing the message, thinking the whole time about the manic look in the sailors eyes. While he refused to accept such an outlandish tale, he had to admit to himself he had never seen such true terror in a pony's eyes.

****************************************

Twilight opened her eyes, her entire field of vision a blur. She heard murmurs around her, too low and distorted to make out. A cool wet sensation hit her face, bringing some amount of clarity to her disoriented mind. As her mind began to clear she could make out more defined images: a cyan wing, a quiet gentle voice. After a few more minutes her world came into focus, her vision clearing and her hearing returning.

Rainbow Dash stood over her, the pegasus's right wing dripping with water. Fluttershy stood off to the side, gently flapping her wing in Spike's face to try to bring the young dragon around. Twilight rose shakily to her hooves, leaning on Rainbow Dash for support.

"Rainbow, Fluttershy, what are you two doing here?"

"I was on weather patrol when I saw the blast blow out of the library." Rainbow helped steady Twilight once she was fully upright.

Fluttershy looked up from Spike for a moment and in her usual soft-spoken voice said, "I was in the market buying some carrots for Angel's supper when Rainbow swooped down and told me what happened at the library," then she returned to fanning the small dragon. He soon groaned softly and began to stir.

"Well, I'm glad you two showed up, but I need you to get yourselves and Spike out of here as soon as possible. There is no telling what that accursed book may do next." Twilight locked her eyes on the book. It was sitting perfectly still in its case, looking to all like just another book in the library. She could no longer feel any of the dark magic it had been emitting prior to her blackout.

"What are you talking about, Twi? That book hasn't done anything since we got here." Rainbow Dash stepped away from Twilight once she was sure the unicorn could stand on her own.

"No, you don't understand! The blast you saw came from that book!" Twilight rushed over to the case, examining every inch of it for signs of damage.

As Twilight combed over the case in the meticulous fashion only she was capable of, Spike finally struggled to his feet. The dragon leaned heavily on Fluttershy as his body came back up to speed. The two ponies and young dragon stood by silently as Twilight's horn glowed an intense whitish-purple, slowly enveloping the wooden case and sealing every nook and cranny with the unicorn's potent magic. As far as Twilight could tell the tome no longer contained any form of magical power whatsoever; it felt almost like an enchanted gem that had run out of power.

"Thank you girls for coming to see if I was okay, but I need you to leave now so I can perform some tests. I know it doesn't seem like much now, but this dusty old book is incredibly dangerous. Princess Celestia herself will be here in the morning to pick it up." Twilight turned to Fluttershy and rested a hoof on her shoulder. "Fluttershy, could you please take Spike home with you? He's been through a lot helping me recently, and after this incident I just can't in good conscience let him stay here."

Fluttershy looked down at the dragon and back up at Twilight, then nodded slowly. Rainbow Dash helped bring Spike downstairs and told Twilight she would be back to check in every other hour. As her friends walked away from her home, Twilight turned and made her way upstairs, a fierce and determined look plastered on her face. She vowed to herself that she would make sure no one else she cared about was harmed because of her negligence concerning this dusty old tome.

****************************************
A tan fur-less creature rose off the ground and brushed himself off. As he cast a gaze around the area, confusion was very evident in his eyes. He most certainly did not remember falling asleep in the woods after his last match. In lieu of panicking the biped adjusted his shimmering yellow and pink cowboy hat and started to march forward. His strut gave off an air of supreme confidence; timber wolf and manticore alike seemed to shy away as the foreign creature made its way through the forest. While it was unclear if he knew exactly where he was headed, he showed no signs of concern. He trudged through the underbrush unfettered, a sense of purpose in every step. It was almost as if he knew the only form of civilization for miles was in the direction he was heading. The only question was what the citizens of Ponyville would do when they encountered this strange new alien.

****************************************

Every fiber of Twilight's being screamed that the data was wrong, yet no matter how many tests she ran or scans she performed it all came back the same. The book was no longer putting out any trace of magic, nor was she feeling the same chilling dread that usually accompanied being in a room with it. She paced the small underground laboratory, wracking her already overstressed mind for possible explanations. The most likely scenario she could think of was that the tome was enchanted and, like enchanted gem, it had simply exhausted its store of magic.

This, however, only opened doors to more questions: How had the book been casting anything at all while in containment? Where had it gotten the magic to cast with in the first place? It certainly didn't have any when she brought it home. Twilight's train of thought came to an abrupt stop as she flashed back to the night she cast her translucency spell. The book had gotten its magic from her. She recalled the overwhelming power she had to feed into the spell for it to take effect; it had been more than enough to charge an enchanted object.

Twilight carefully slid the book off the examination table and swiftly deposited it in a locker she used to house test tubes and beakers. Once the book was safely locked away, she proceeded to shut down her entire lab switch by switch. There was no telling whether the dark text had already absorbed more magic from all of her testing, but Twilight knew now that she had to keep it as far as possible from all forms of magical energy. When she was sure that every last machine was turned off and the laboratory secured, Twilight killed the lights and shut and locked the door. With an exhausted sigh she made her way to the front door. She knew she should take this small respite to get some rest, but she was worried about Spike, and her mind would not be put to ease until she knew he was alright.

As Twilight made her way to Fluttershy's cottage she finally realized how utterly exhausted she was. Her hooves were dragging slightly as she walked, her eye lids felt like they had sandbags weighing them down, and her temples throbbed slightly after every step. If Spike had indeed come out of the whole ordeal in good health, Twilight contemplated asking Fluttershy to keep an eye on the baby dragon while she returned home for a much needed nap. The relief she felt over finally understanding the source of the dark tome's power and knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that it could no longer harm anyone from it's new prison was overwhelming.

As the humble little dwelling came into view, Twilight could her Fluttershy's song birds singing merrily in the trees, a relaxing little tune that did all the more to soothe her frayed nerves. Twilight approached the door and knocked gently - she knew that some of Fluttershy's animals were nearly as timid as their pegasus caretaker. It only took a moment for the door to open and for Fluttershy to invite her in, Twilight remaining vigilant so as not to accidentally step on a scurrying mouse or ferret.

"It's good to see you up and about Twilight. Did you manage to take care of the problem at home?"

"I did manage to puzzle through most of the situation, so the rest can wait for a time. I discovered enough to be sure that this time, the troublesome little book will be no threat to anypony."

"That's wonderful news, Twilight! I guess you're here to check on little Spike; he came around shortly after Rainbow and I got him here. I managed to feed him some gem soup and found him a comfy spot to rest in, so he's asleep right now in the bedroom if you'd like to see him

Fluttershy escorted Twilight up the stairs and into her bedroom. There, at the foot of the bed in what appeared to be one of Opal's spare cat beds, was the sleeping form of Spike curled up under a checkered blanket.

"There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with him as a result of the accident; I gave him a full examination once he woke up and didn't find any cuts or bruises, and none of his bones appear to be broken. After he gets a little bed rest I'm sure he'll be back to 100% in no time."

Twilight smiled and ran a hoof over Spike's cheek. "I am so relieved he's okay. I can't thank you enough for taking care of him, Fluttershy."

"Oh, it was no trouble at all, Twilight. You know I'd always make sure he would get the best care he could possibly hope for."

Twilight nodded and gave her friend a tight hug. She knew she could depend on any of her friends in a time of need, but Fluttershy was always prepared to drop anything at a moments notice if she was needed. As the two friends broke away from the embrace, Twilight couldn't help but stifle a yawn. Fluttershy saw this and exclaimed in concern, "Oh my, Twilight, you look awful!"

Twilight fought back another yawn. "I know. With all that's been going on recently I haven't had any proper rest since the night before last. I was going to ask you if you could keep an eye on Spike for me while I go home and try to take a nap. Would that be too much to ask?"

"Oh, not at all, Twilight. I'd be happy to dragonsit for you. I'll bring Spike home in a couple of hours if that sounds alright."

"That sounds amazing, Fluttershy. Thank you again. I promise I'll make this up to you."

Fluttershy dismissed Twilight's offer for repayment and shuffled the drowsy unicorn out the door, instructing her to head straight home and get some rest before the lack of sleep started to affect her health. With a nod and a wave Twilight made her way home, trying to avoid small talk with anypony without giving off the impression that she was trying to be rude. As she entered the library she locked the door up tight, made sure the sign was set to 'closed', and marched directly upstairs to her bedroom where she discarded her saddlebag and collapsed into bed.

Unlike the previous night, Twilight drifted almost immediately to sleep. The only stray thoughts wandering through her head were how happy she'd be once the princess arrived to end this horrible little nightmare. Soon, the only thing that could be heard throughout the loft were the soft sounds of Twilight snoring. Little did Twilight know that she would need all the sleep she could get if she was to have enough energy to deal with what would await her when she woke up.

*************************************

A bronze, alien biped emerged blinking from the treeline, the bright rays of sunlight temporarily disorientating him. As he scanned the horizon, a small town came into view and a low grumble emanated from his stomach. He couldn't be sure whether the inhabitants of the town would be friendly or not, but, at this point, any prospect of food was enough to merit a quick check. With a destination set he began the march to the small village, curious to see what kind of people inhabited it.

*************************************

Twilight was in the middle a particularly amazing dream when her dream world came crashing down to the sound of frantic knocking. As she rose groggily from her bed she could also make out the faint sounds of screaming emanating from outside. Twilight's horn burst to life in a magenta glow as she levitated a brush from her dresser and quickly ran it through her disheveled mane. After a quick glance in the mirror to make sure she was at least somewhat presentable she made her way downstairs to see about this incessant knocking.

As Twilight approached her front door she could make out the voices of both Rarity and Fluttershy. She wondered to herself why two of her closest friends would be nearly bashing her door in. It wasn't a second after she opened the door that her friends came barging into her home, both looking a bit wild in the eyes.

"What's the matter, girls, you both look panicked half to death." Twilight shut the door and turn back around to her friends.

"Twilight, darling," Rarity started, when Fluttershy cried, "there's an alien in Ponyville!"

"It's true; it showed up out of nowhere and sent the town into a frenzy," Rarity explained. Fluttershy seemed far more rattled by the incident than Rarity.

Twilight set them with a hard stare. "Come on, girls, an alien? I think you might be overreacting a bit."

Fluttershy kicked at the ground and cast a nervous glance at Twilight. "Well, um, I know almost all of the creatures that live in the surrounding area, including the Everfree, and I've never seen anything like this before."

"I've never seen anything dressed so absurdly! That ghastly pink and yellow hat, those ridiculous yellow streamers attached to the sleeves, why I have never witnessed a more repulsive fashion abomination in all my life!".

Twilight shook her head and gave her friends another annoyed stare. "Well, from what I can hear outside there is certainly something going on in town. I suppose I should check it and make sure it isn't a threat to the citizens. Come on, girls, show me where you saw this alien."

Rarity and Fluttershy lead Twilight to the center of the market, the last known sighting of the alien. Twilight took in the scene: the market was a complete disaster. The ground was littered with broken and splintered wood from destroyed shop stands. As she surveyed the scene she spotted odd prints in the sand, long flat prints far removed from the hoof prints dominating the ground.

"Come on girls, I think the alien went this way." Twilight pointed and began following the strange prints.

The trio of ponies followed the tracks to the path leading out of town and into the Everfree. The tracks seemed to end abruptly at a small field, where in the middle of a small circle of flowers stood the alien. He was unlike anything Twilight had ever seen: He stood upright on two legs and appeared hairless save for his head and beard, his bronze skin covered in a cornucopia of bizarre clothing. He wore a pink and yellow cowboy hat with a scribble of black down the middle separating the two colors, as well as a pair of yellow and black checkerboard sunglasses. His massive frame was clothed in chaotic colors, pink polka dots over yellow on one side of his chest and yellow polka dots over pink on the other. His jacket was a shiny black that appeared to have had pink liquid drizzled over it, yellow streamers hanging from its sleeves. His lower body was clothed in much the same fashion as the rest - a split of yellow on pink and pink on yellow - with a massive golden belt around his mid section, inscribed with the words "World Heavyweight Champion".

Twilight's mind could barely process this bizarre creature, and as a result she uttered the first question that popped into her head: "Who and what are you?"

The Alien shot her a wild look through his glasses, his face full of confidence and determination.

"I'm the tower of power, too sweet to be sour. I'm funky like a monkey. Sky's the limit and space is the place! Oooooh yeeeah!"

Author's Note:

Thanks to my wonderful editor Aura for her hard work cleaning this mess up despite having college work to focus on.

Also since I'm not entirely sure everyone will be old enough to figure out exactly who I'm introducing in this chapter here is a little visual aid.

Comments

[Pyro The Reader]

What the, is that Macho Man?