The Cloud Kicker Has Been Doubled
THE CLOUD KICKER HAS BEEN DOUBLED
The two of us stare at one another for an interminable moment, and then we both spring into action at exactly the same time. I lunge straight for her in the hope of ending this before it can even begin, but she anticipates me and whips her wing around, sending the bottle of dye hurtling straight towards my head. I manage to twist my face away and bring a foreleg up, and by some miracle none of the spattering dye gets into my eyes. By the time I can safely look back towards where the changeling was a second ago, she’s gone.
Two hooves slam into my back, forcing me down onto the hard tile of the bathroom floor. I skid to an achy stop, and turn to see a blonde tail whipping around the doorframe. Fighting through the pain to get back onto my hooves, I dash after her.
I catch her trying desperately to tie on the saddlebags from my kitchen, and position myself between her and my front door. “Who are you? What do you want?” I demand.
The green-maned me looks up, apparently surprised that I recovered so quickly. “Cloud Kicker, please. Just step aside and we both walk away from this clean. You’ll never see me again, I swear.”
“Not without some answers. You’re a changeling, aren’t you?”
Surprisingly, she doesn’t answer right away. She just hangs her head and sighs. “I don’t even know anymore. I was, then there was that explosion and everything got all mixed up. I won’t hurt you any more than I have to, or anypony for that matter. But I won’t let you stop me, either. I need to get away from here. I... I remember your life, Cloud Kicker. Every detail of it. I don’t know why, or how, but I do.”
“Well then you know enough about me to know that I’m not letting you go,” I say as I crouch into a combat stance.
She examines an overripe peach that’s been sitting on my counter for a while now, turning it over in her hooves. “Never thought you would.” An instant later, it’s flying towards me.
Not this time. I fling a hoof aside to block the projectile and throw a blind kick upwards, and I luck out when I feel it sink into yielding muscle. The pony... changeling... thing... crashes into the back of my couch as she tumbles end-over-end from my blow. She turns the momentum from my strike into a stumbling retreat towards my bedroom, and I bolt after her.
She tries to slam my bedroom door into my face, but I crash through, sending splinters flying everywhere. My doppelganger is going for the wingblades fastened to the wall, and they fall to the floor as I tackle her from behind. I catch an elbow to my face for my trouble, and grab at the weapons as I roll away. We each come up with one of them, and there’s a momentary unspoken truce as we fasten them onto ourselves.
“You could really hurt somepony with one of those, Cloud Kicker,” says my double as we begin to circle one another.
Isn’t that the point? I charge. Wielding one blade is a tad awkward, but mixed in with my pummeling hooves it’ll do the job. I knock the changeling’s weapon away, and she’s helpless. I bring my edge down towards her face, nothing but her death on my mind.
Something presses into just the wrong spot on my arm, and something else on my shoulder. It’s perfectly synchronized to send my strike off target, and I miss. My blade bites into the wood of my bedframe, and a sudden impact into stomach knocks me away. I convert the momentum of the blow into a roll as I’m flung away from the pony I meant to harm.
“How?” is all I can whisper as I try to rise up from the counterattack.
Somehow, my opponent’s heard me. “Oh please, Mom taught us how to counter that by our eleventh birthday. I should know; it was on the test.”
“She’s... my mother. Not yours,” I protest.
“Not the way I remember it,” she says.
I’m not in very good shape. At some point this bitch landed a lucky hit on the face and my left eye is starting to swell up, and I mentally adjust to my compromised peripheral vision. I’m honestly not sure I’ll win in a straight-up fight, which leaves one option: Get her talking. “You aren’t a changeling anymore? Prove it.”
My opponent seems a bit taken aback by my concession, and the half-step she loses is window of opportunity enough for me to lunge at her. No luck, as she wraps a foreleg around my torso and redirects my charge into a wall. “The Mom thing wasn’t enough?”
I groan as I try to rise up from the blow. It’s harder than it should be. “Ooh, a Kicker with mommy issues. That must have really taxed your intelligence-gathering capabilities, changeling.”
“Need more proof?” she asks as I glare at her. “Remember when Star was six and you told her that there was a family of flesh-eating batponies that snuck in to roost every night at midnight? And the only way to get rid of them was to bang on the 'magic gong' you gave her until they flew away?”
That does stop me. Actually, both of us stop and chuckle. Auntie Gust was not pleased when she was woken up at three in the morning by the resulting commotion. My uncle, on the other hoof, slept through the entire thing. But soon enough I recover. “Plenty of ponies could have told you about that. I still don't believe you.” I take a step closer, and she steps forward to meet me. “One more chance. Prove it to me, or one of us dies tonight.”
The intruder pauses. “...If that’s what it’ll take. You had a dream the night before you decided to quit the guard. I remember it.”
My jaw drops. “You’re... you’re bluffing,” I assert. I’ve never told anypony about that. Not my parents. Not Auntie Gust. Not even Blossomforth. “I had a lot on my mind that night. Just because I dreamed of something doesn’t prove anything.”
“Oh, you want details? You’re falling. You try to recover but both of your wings are mangled, torn apart by an enemy you can’t remember. You look up, and see nopony else but Shadow Kicker diving beside you, keeping pace with your fall. You plead for her to save you, but she won’t. Then she drifts right up to you and whispers in your ear-”
Somepony starts pounding on my front door, snapping me out of my trance.
“You really are me, aren’t you?” I ask, staring directly at the panicked look on her face.
Her gaze softens, then breaks as she can’t quite look at me. “I hope to be, for what that’s worth. Right now... I’m not sure I deserve it.”
I study her a bit longer, and the pounding from my front door becomes more urgent. “Hide somewhere. Anywhere. I’ll take care of this.” I march over to my front door, and throw it open to reveal two guardponies. “Hey,” I say as casually as I can manage, “what’s up?”
“Standard patrol, Cloud,” says one of them, a stallion I recognize.
“Bulwark! Garrison! It’s been awhile. To what do I owe the pleasure? You’re inspecting everypony’s home now?”
“Your neighbors reported odd noises coming from your residence, Cloud. We’re just here to check it out. Can we come in?” asks the armored stallion.
I pause. Decision time. “Odd noises, huh? Look, what with the whole invasion of Canterlot thing going on, a lot of ponies decided they needed some immediate stress relief. Who was I to say no? Frankly, you should give me a medal for public service. But I'm afraid that my guests are in a somewhat compromising position at the moment, and they aren’t into public performances..."
The guards hesitate, which tells me that I’ve won. “What’s that stuff on on your face?” asks Bulwark.
“Lubricant,” I lie. “Want to hear how it got there?”
The two guards look at one another, then turn away to whisper between themselves as I try not to freak out too badly. When they both sigh, I feel the tension between my shoulders start to dissipate. “Only you, Cloud Kicker,” says Bulwark.
“Yep, I sure am one-of-a-kind!” I insist, praying that it isn’t too much. "Hey, we've got room for two more. After all, you must have had just an awful day. Care to join us?"
"Not interested," says Garrison. "Just let us know if you see anything out of the ordinary."
"You got it. Now if there's nothing else, I think I hear somepony calling my name. Which is surprising. What with the ball gag, and all."
The two of them leave and I close the door, letting a bit of the hidden tension ease away. I think they bought it. Trotting back to the bedroom, I don’t see the other me anywhere. I check the closet, under the bed, every hiding spot I can think of, but none of them pay off. Great, I extend a little trust to the thing and she runs off on me. “Cloud Kicker?” I call out to the empty room.
“Yes?” answers a voice directly behind me. I flap my wings and leap into the air as I spin around, snapping my leg out into a reflexive roundhouse kick that the pony behind me deflects easily. She chuckles.
“How did you do that?” I ask her, as the pounding in my ears starts to die down.
“Did you think I forgot how to be a changeling? I’ve spent my entire life learning how to hide. Er... one of my lives, anyway. Besides, that little crawl space behind the loose panel was the perfect place to stash myself away. Guards wouldn't ever have found me."
I thought I was the only one who knew about that spot. Guess that's not the case anymore. "So what do we do now?"
She shrugs. "Wanna bang?"
"Heh, bet you couldn't show me anything I haven't seen before. We'll get to that eventually, I'm sure. Right now, I'd rather you told me who else you replaced in town. I doubt you and Bon Bon were the only two."
She shakes her head. "Sorry. Not going to happen. Those changelings are as much my family as Alula and Uncle Tornado. I'm not going to turn them in."
I frown at that. "I could march right outside this instant and give you over to Bulwark and Garrison. Maybe you want to think about being more cooperative."
"You're a lousy bluffer, Cloud. I don't know what we are, exactly, whether we're sisters or clones or something else. But I do know that you won't sell out your family, the same way I won't sell out mine. Kickers stick together. I heard what Lyra did to Bon Bon. Are you really going to stand by and watch somepony do that to me? Because if you are then I'd rather you just slit my throat with that blade and make it quick." She stares at me with pleading eyes. "Please don't take this life away from me, Cloud. I've only really been a pony for one day, but even with everything that happened this afternoon, it's already been the best day of my life."
Wow. Apparently I'm really good at guilt tripping ponies. "What exactly are you asking for from me?"
"Just let me hide out here for a couple days. Once the initial panic blows over, I'll throw on a disguise and catch a train for some other town. Nopony ever has to know I exist."
"You're just going to start over? What about your friends? Heck, what about the rest of the clan? You're okay with just cutting yourself off from all that?"
She shakes her head. "It's not a question of what I'm okay with. Unless something changes that's my best available option."
I sit quietly in the dark bedroom, trying to imagine breaking contact with everypony I've ever known. Cloud Kicker is trying to put a brave face on it, but I know the truth. What she's suggesting will crush her. "No."
"What do you mean by that?" she asks, her ears perking up.
"I mean no, you aren't running away with your tail between your legs. Stay here while things calm down, then we'll start introducing you to the other ponies in town. You're me. You'll win 'em over with that classic Cloud Kicker charm."
She scoffs. "Love the confidence, but I don't think you understand how badly some of them will hate me. I have decades of memories of ponies I lied to, and the times when I was found out? Never went well."
"Cloud. Look at me," I insist. "Look me in the eyes and tell me you honestly believe that a pony like Blossom would rather see you alone than give you a chance."
She opens her mouth to reply. Then closes it again without saying a word.
"...Thanks, Cloud Kicker. For believing in me."
"No problem. What can I say? It would be a tragedy for a pony as devastatingly sexy as yourself to get herself lynched. Stay here tonight, and we'll work out the details in the morning." She hesitantly trots over to me and let's me give her a hug. I yawn. The next few days are going to be rough on both of us, and I doubt the fact that I'm technically harboring a fugitive would go over well if she's discovered. She was right about one thing, though: Kickers stick together. Climbing into my bed, I pat a spot on the mattress next to me and she jumps up to join me under the covers, snuggling up against me for warmth and comfort. "You don't still have any way to eat affection, right?"
I feel her shake her head. "Not anymore. Still feels nice to experience it, though," she says quietly. Despite intensity of the evening, sleep overtakes her within a minute, and I'm not far behind. The last thing I wonder is just what I've gotten myself into.
-------------------------
Sitting in the office the next day, my mind drifts away from the details of the department's budget towards the guest who's hiding in my basement. It was easy to promise to help her on the spur of the moment, but now the logistics of actually doing so are staring me in the face. The other me doesn't have any money, but she still has to eat. We agreed that she can't be allowed outside unless I'm home so nopony sees us in two places at once, but knowing me she'll start getting antsy after spending a few days cooped up.
"A bit for your thoughts?" asks Blossom from across the room.
"Hmm?" I look up to see her studying me. "Oh, yeah. I guess all the stuff about the changelings that happened yesterday is on my mind today."
"You and everypony else in town. Can you imagine how weird it would be to wake up one day and discover somepony had tried to steal your entire life?"
"Vividly," I mutter. "Hey, Blossom, if it had been you instead of Lyra and me instead of Bon Bon, what would you have done?"
Blossomforth stops what she’s doing and nibbles on tip of a quill as she thinks. "Probably just tried to pin it down until the guards could get some shackles onto it. Hard to say for sure."
"But you don't believe that it might have been telling the truth?"
"Cloud Kicker, it's a changeling. Lying and deception are as natural to them as breathing. Of course I wouldn't assume it was telling the truth. Let the guards sort that out later, when the danger to ponies' lives has passed."
"I guess so," I say. Not really the answer I was hoping for, but I suppose it could be worse. “Anyway, I’m going to go cover Raindrops’ sector since she’s still not feeling well. You good here?”
Blossom nods. “Yep. See you later.”
Raindrops being out sick is an excellent excuse to get out of the office for a few hours. Physical labor is exactly what I need to take my mind off of the pony- and she is a pony, whatever the others may believe- waiting for me at home. I do a quick flyover of my house just to confirm that it hasn’t been broken into and searched by the royal guard, but everything looks to be quiet. A ways away I notice Azalea out in her front yard, her face and legs smudged with dirt as she works the little patch of land she’s carved out as her garden. Come to think of it, this is the first time I’ve ever seen her actually doing any gardening.
“Hey Azalea,” I call down to her with a wave, and I drop down to land on the sidewalk. “Feeling better this morning?”
She smiles at me. “Yeah, much better. Growing things helps a bunch, you know? Plus, I was starting to run low on merchandise to sell. Gotta get a move on or I won’t have an income anymore, and that would be bad.”
“Glad to hear it. You seemed really upset last night.”
“Did you make any more progress figuring out who the other changeling or changelings are? Do you still think Algae Bloom was one?”
I almost forgot about that. “I’m not so sure. I do still want to talk to her, though. She certainly acts like she is. She’d be the sort of pony it would be tempting for them to replace, one with lots of friends in low places.”
“Just don’t go around accusing anypony of anything without proof,” she says, digging a little hole in the ground and sprinkling in a few seeds. “Making an accusation like that could really mess up somepony’s life, and probably the lives of their friends too. How would you like it if she accused you, just because you’ve had a lot of partners?”
I gulp. “Azalea, I’m not a changeling. Never have been.”
“I’m not... I get that Cloudy, I really do. I’m just saying that while things are this tense you have to be responsible.” She glances over and a weed catches her eye. “Look, I have to get back to work, and I’ll bet you do too. Thanks for checking in on me, though. Maybe I could swing by sometime later and we could have dinner?”
“Tonight isn’t good for me. Another night?” I ask. The last thing I need is anypony coming by my house and discovering my new roommate.
Azalea looks a bit hurt, but nods. “Sure, whatever works for you. Just keep me posted on how the changeling hunt is going.”
“Will do,” I say, feeling like an absolute cad as I lie to her face. I take off again, all my stress bubbling away in my gut. Divided loyalties suck. The next few hours fly by as I clear out the skies. We’re scheduled to have some fog roll through tonight from the Everfree, so the overcast afternoon is cancelled in favor of making up for the sunlight we’ll be missing out on tomorrow morning. I’ll be glad when Dash gets back tonight, even if she won’t be coming into the office for the rest of the week.
When the day’s over and I head back home, I discover that a special evening edition of the newspaper was delivered while I was out, and Cloud Kicker is sitting inside reading it with a wet towel wrapped around her mane. Looks like she at least got around to washing the dye out of her mane while I was out. A pot of something is boiling on the stovetop. She glances up as I walk in, and wordlessly hoofs over the front page. Plastered across the entire page above the fold is a massive headline:
ELEMENTS OF HARMONY THWART SURPRISE CHANGELING ATTACK! EXPERIMENTAL TIME MAGICS CREDITED AS FORCE MULTIPLIER. TWILIGHT SPARKLE UNAVAILABLE FOR COMMENT.
My faithful student has had a very long day. We’ll release an official statement when we have all the facts. -Princess Celestia
I skim the article, and something catches my eye. Princess Celestia and Luna have issued a preliminary pardon for any transformed changeling. Unless they’re witnessed changing shape or attempting to influence another pony’s mind with their powers, they won’t be immediately arrested on sight. Flipping the page, a large pie chart is dominated by one color.
ERROR MARGIN’S FLASH POLL: “DO YOU BELIEVE THE FORMER CHANGELINGS SHOULD BE PROSECUTED FOR THEIR ROLE IN THE ATTACK?”
Yes- 78%
No- 11%
Not Sure- 10%
“It doesn’t look like we’re a very popular group right now,” says my double. She tries to smile at me, but it doesn’t quite touch her eyes.
“It hasn’t been long enough for ponies to calm down yet. I’m sure when they do most of them will change their minds. Besides, you’ve got the Princesses on your side, isn’t that great news?” I ask. I only hope that’s the truth.
“I read the article. I remember what the other changelings put all those ponies through, and it sounds like Twilight Sparkle got worse than most from what the reports are saying. Even after all that, though, she and her friends really saved us all. How can I possibly repay her for that? She probably hates us more than anypony.”
“Well, maybe the two of us can arrange a thank you banging session between one of you and her.”
“With Twilight? I really don’t see that ever happening.”
I shrug. “Yeah, probably not. So what’d you make for dinner?”
She walks over to take the pot off the stove. “Just some oatmeal. I made a grocery list, by the way. We’re out of milk.” I groan, which she takes notice of. “Sorry. I’d have gone out shopping this afternoon, but... you know.” She scoops the oatmeal into two bowls, and sprinkles a bit of brown sugar over the top before sliding it in front of me. She flaps her wings a couple times to blow cool air over the bowl.
I make a decision. It’s a risk, but one that I want to take. “I’ll go shopping tomorrow. You should come with me.”
Cloud Kicker’s spoon freezes halfway up to her mouth. “No way. I can’t face them yet. Who knows what they might try?”
“You’re just another pony now, remember? The guard will be on your side if they try anything. Plus they’ll have to go through me first. I think between the two of us, we’ll hold our own.”
“But how does that help?” she asks. “Beating up a couple of jerks isn’t going to make anypony believe I’m less dangerous. It’ll only confirm their worst suspicions.”
"Or you'll surprise them and change some minds. Come on, Cloud, you have to get out there eventually. Do you really want to spend another day hiding inside? At least this way things will be on our terms." She hesitates, and I decide not to force the issue. "Just think about it, alright?"
-----------------------
It takes a little more coaxing later that night and the following morning, but we end up walking out the door together the next morning into a town blanketed with heavy fog. I don’t mind; this stuff will burn off by itself by noon and Cloud Kicker will probably appreciate the concealment. Come to think of it, we really need to come up with a better name for her if we’re going to be hanging around one another in public. Otherwise, it’s only a matter of time before some pony calls out ‘Hey, Cloud Kicker! Wanna bang?’ and accidentally finds themself in a three-way.
On the other hoof, Cloud Kicker is fine.
She sticks close to my side as we wander into town, instinctively keeping me between herself and any larger groups. “You’re going to have to stop hiding sometime, Cloud,” I remind her. She nods but doesn’t say anything.
The mists are beginning to clear as we reach the vendors, and ponies are starting to take notice of us. Conversations die away and are replaced by furtive whispering as we go by, and ponies glance at us but then turn away when we look back at them.
When I see Lyra seated on a nearby bench running some scales on her harp, I decide to take a chance. Clearly, the right thing to do in a very delicate situation like this one is to plow ahead without heeding potential dangers. "Come on, Cloud. Let's go introduce you to Lyra."
She goes pale. "Lyra? After what she did in front of everypony the other day? Are you insane?"
"You know her and you know how to get along with her. She's been a friend for a long time. And if everypony here sees you winning her over..."
"Oh. I get it. If the mare with the unchallengeable anti-changeling reputation thinks I'm okay, then so will they. But what if it blows up in our faces?"
"Then remember that her back-left knee is weak and take her down with extreme prejudice, obviously." That wins me a rueful chuckle, at least. "Seriously, it's going to work out fine. Besides, she's already spotted you and she's walking over here."
Cloud's head snaps back towards Lyra, who is indeed walking over here with her ears pinned flat against her head. "Hello, Cloud Kicker. And I guess you're Cloud Kicker too."
"Hey, Lyra. It's nice to meet you... again."
"Yeah," says Lyra. The tension in the square is palpable, and the eyes of everypony around us is fixed on the two mares. Cloud squeezes her eyes closed, fighting every instinctive reaction her changeling memories are screaming at her to hide away. I would give anything for something to interrupt this awkward moment.
From down the street, Fluttershy's voice rings out. "No, Mister Parrot! Come back!"
There's a squawk and a flash of crimson, and the bird zips by our heads with Fluttershy in hot pursuit. "Bwawk! Twilight Sparkle is a lesbian! Bwawk!"
...I would give anything for a million bits to fall from the sky into my lap.
...
No? That was a one time thing? Whatever, I'll take it. Cloud and Lyra's gazes follow the bird and then they turn to look at one another, hostility forgotten. Lyra snickers, and a minute later the two of them are rolling on the ground laughing like the old buddies that they are. The crowd seems to mostly accept Lyra's judgement of Cloud's character; all except one pony.
"Lyra!" shouts Bon Bon from across the street. "Why are you getting all friendly with that... that thing? You had the right idea when you were running them out of town."
Oh, horse apples. That, I wasn't expecting. "No, Bonnie, I didn't. In fact..." Lyra's happy mood vanishes as quickly as it came, "What I almost did to her... to you..."
"That was not me. I don't care if she managed to take some of my memories with her, she was still the thing that stuck me in a cocoon. Do you know what it's like in one of those things? The kind of nightmares they put in your head? It's easy for you to say you went overboard, but I think Cloud, the real Cloud, should have let you finish what you started."
"Hey!" I shout back at her, "I think you need to back off. How would you like it if you suddenly woke up one day and found the mare you love beating you half to death with her bare hooves?"
"She didn't love you! I'm the one who loves you, Lyra. Don't expect me to sympathize with some cheap copy, not after what she did."
Bon Bon takes another step towards Cloud with an aggressive look in her eyes that I don't like at all. With a flap of my wings, I place myself between them. "Back off, Bon Bon."
"No," says my double as she gently pushes me to the side. "Bon Bon is right. I wasn't the one who replaced her, but I did play a part in hurting her. So she deserves the chance to hurt me back."
"Nopony is hurting anypony!" I try to insist, but Cloud ignores me.
"Do you want to hurt me, Bon Bon?" Bon Bon's only response is a feral growl. "Go ahead. I won't stop you."
Bon Bon's hoof lashes out and catches Cloud's jaw. She tumbles to the dusty ground, and Bon Bon looks down on her in horror. Then, ever so gradually, Cloud pushes herself back up, standing tall again in the street despite a trickle of blood running from her mouth. Her eyes are clear, only showing regret and compassion.
"Do you want to hurt me again?"
The question shakes Bon Bon out of her terrified stupor. She halfheartedly shoves her in her chest, and Cloud falls back on her plot. Just as quickly, she's right back on her hooves.
"Do you want to hurt me again?"
Bon Bon takes a step forward and raises her hoof again. Cloud doesn't flinch. She just stares directly back into Bon Bon's eyes as she waits for another blow.
It doesn't ever arrive. Instead, Bon Bon breaks down into tears and is immediately rushed and wrapped up in a hug by both Lyra and Cloud. I smile as I wrap my own wing around the whole little gang. A thousand indecent comments pass through my mind, but for once I just let the moment happen.
"So, this is leading up to an orgy, right?" asks Cloud from the middle of the little group.
Yeah. She's me alright.
I have to break off from the hug early. Lyra and Bon Bon promise that they'll introduce the newest Kicker to the rest of the town while I go into work. I glance up at the now-sunny sky.
Looks like all that nasty fog burned itself away after all.
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What did the one percent vote for?
3168856
Pat Buchanan
3168856
Death by Snu-Snu.
I can't stop laughing
Oh my god
No stop it
....
Yep; definately another Cloud Kicker
"Bwawk! Twilight Sparkle is a lesbian! Bwawk!"
3168856 Ron Paul.
I feel really bad for that other Bon Bon now. I don't remember if she was mentioned in the other stories, but I really hope she makes it back safe. Or somewhere else safe. Or something...
panicked
Should place a comma here. Cause it's technically "I wasn't expecting that." Just with a bit of flipping.
3168856
Don't forget his name is Error
Nice to see Kicky finally fitting in. One thing I wasn't too certain of is whether Kicky still had her mane green.
Also... that parrot...
Was that a Scott Pilgrim reference I saw?
3168856 Summary execution
rlv.zcache.com/buzz_kill_post_cards-r5465774bb6604d47b7a6664330581ccb_vgbaq_8byvr_512.jpg
3168928
I like your style.
3168856 That one percent are the changelings that didn't vote :P
3168928>>3168970 So I read the two comments and ended up saying snu snu and giggling and then ew Ron Paul and completely baffled my poor partner.
Awesome chapter! I can't wait to hear more. Though I am finding my brain ticking over and wondering if they're genetically identical copies of the ponies they replicated and if they are if they also share the same bacterial culture even though they don't share genes with the pony. (Your gut bacteria and stuff have nothing to do with your DNA)
This isn't merely good. This is actually better than the "Time trilogy". The thing that made me like it in the first place was the character development and interactions - and this has those in spades.
Also, seeing the events of those stories from a normal pony perspective is very cool.
3168856 No comment (Princess Luna).
3168966 Yeah, that was right out of the blue ... until I remembered Fluttershy explaining it in Hard Reset.
3169173 Good question, as I don't think that's ever been explained.
However, since we're talking magical ... insect ... pony-things, I'd have to say that's more than just a possibility.
Until evidence comes up to the contrary, I'll go with that as a working hypothesis.
As for the gut cultures, several someponies are going to have some digestive issues until they get their own.
3169255 Cloud Kicker = normal?
Sorry; someone had to...
And now we
knowhave a partial reasonable explanation why Cloud bolted from West Hoof. Ouch. That would do it. Very ouch.Gotta wonder what Shadow said; can't help it.
Half-way called it; that's good enough in the Winningverse.
Something feels like it's missing here. We all know that the changelings got turned into full ponies, but Cloud Kicker shouldn't, because it's never actually mentioned here.
3168856
Rounding error.
Yay, Twilight's been called a lesbi by a parrot, we are almost to were Celestia and Luna explain to the rest of ponydom that the changlings have turned into ponies.
Now for some unknown reason, I need to go wash out my mouth.
3168856
What Changelings?- 1%
Nice
I'm not sure how this relates to the previous line about Mr. Parrot.
However, still fricken' hilarious chapter.
3169809
I would give anything for something to interrupt this awkward moment.
From down the street, Fluttershy's voice rings out. "No, Mister Parrot! Come back!"
There's a squawk and a flash of crimson, and the bird zips by our heads with Fluttershy in hot pursuit. "Bwawk! Twilight Sparkle is a lesbian! Bwawk!"
...I would give anything for a million bits to fall from the sky into my lap.
:D
Heh. Hahaha haha.
Man, with Cloud Kicker, the jokes just write themselves.
3169934
Ah, I missed the connection there.
Makes so much more sense now!
I never thought that parrot would come back as an important plot point.
3169809
This part:
Oh man, not only is this story hilarious, it also has a lot of really awesome moments. Moments that have you on the edge of your seat. Moments that also have me in fit of laughter.
This scene will never be forgotten.
3169318 Yeah it is. Go back and read the story.
3170161
Already got the memo, but thank you!
3170192
Where, the doppleganger fight? CKII never actually says she's not a changeling anymore, just that she doesn't know, and that she doesn't want to hurt CK. The newspaper article? The paper talks about 'transformed changeling's, and suggests that they might still have changeling powers, and then immediately jumps to 'former changelings'. We can fill in the gaps there, but I don't think she could. Plus, it seems like the kind of thing CK would want to narrate to us, so I was surprised when she didn't.
Oh my God!
Wait, shouldn't that be "Mother of me"?
All of us know that the only thing we're quoting is Fluttershy's parrot.
So, that moment is something that we can't put a price on. Like that is the grandest way to break the tension of any situation. I wonder how much Eakin laughed at that moment as he wrote it.
3168856
"get off my lawn"
usually reported as 'misc.'
3170464
Valid points, but she reached the conclusion that the other mare somehow WAS her. The extrapolation is not a significant leap.
3170464 No not this story, in one of his past stories. Can't remember which one but Twilight does come across two Cloud Kickers.
Somepony tell me I wasn't the only one whose brain jumped from Kicky's "Wanna bang?" to Shepards "We'll bang,okay?" from Gamer poop.
3168856 They are the 1%. Why should they ever need to vote like commoners?
Heavy feels in this one.
(Wonder what became of Bon Bon 2.
)
3172991 My thoughts exactly. Now that Lyra is accepting of transformed changelings and Bon Bon is starting to as well. Maybe someone should go search for poor Bonling, before she starves to death in the Everfree or something.
3168970
I think I remember Twilight commenting on the changling situation, claiming that the Bonclone had been run out of town and was still hiding in the everfree, and that most of the town was waiting for her to come back, possibly with searches going on.
Also I wonder if Error Margin's cutie mark is a pie chart or a bar graph.
"tradgedy" => "tragedy"
"here mane" => "her mane"
3168856
If you look at most newspaper or other professional polls, the percentages often don't add up to 100%, a phenomenon that irks me greatly.
3173303>>3169012
Thanks, I'll make those corrections. Also, the did where Cloudy finds Kicky with her mane wrapped in a wet towel was supposed to be an indication that she'd washed the dye out, but that really isn't clear at all from what I wrote. I'll probably toss in another line there to clarify.
3169173
Genetics, yes. Bacteria cultures I hadn't really thought about it. There definitely will NOT be a scene in the future where Cloudy gives Kicky a fecal transplant.
3168970>>3172991>>3173100>>3173181
The only time Bon Bon 2 was mentioned was that she was run out of town, and that wasn't until Fate which is months later. That said, I do have a plan for her to eventually reappear.
3174107 So, nopony is even gonna try to find her?
Also I don't remember the thing with the parrot, but it's been ages since I read Hard Reset. As for the thing with the bacterial cultures, the Elements transfered memories for pete's sake, I'm sure they can transfer bacteria too.
3174202
She has at least a two or three day head start, and she probably doesn't want to be found. Plus, while Lyra and Bon Bon may have forgiven Kicky fairly easily, that doesn't mean that everypony is hunky-dory with the idea of changelings in their midst.
Finally, while she was run out of town that doesn't mean she ended up in the Everfree.
3174107 Phew! While I do find the science behind it fascinating, it's not something I really think needs to be addressed in pony fic.
3168928
3174232
Oh, come now. Everyone knows every changeling in distress winds up in the Everfree Forest, then in a zany buddy comedy with one of the Mane Six. Every last one of them.
3174202
The parrot bit comes from the end of Hard Reset.