• Member Since 30th Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen March 1st

pchn00


T

The war for Equestria's freedom has ended. The wicked Queen Galaxia and her coalition of evil have been overthrown, and the rightful ruler has retrurned. The majority of Equestria's citizens have spent the last eleven months rebuilding their devastated kingdom while maintaining an optimistic outlook for the future.

A select few however aren't quite as cheered. The events of the final battle forced the hero of the day, Jubilant Surprise going by the name Jennifer once again to depart Equestria for her native Earth. Her home world is in the grip of a madman using stolen chaos magics to cow the human populace, while a new threat is stirring back in Equestria. The fate of both world's could rest in Jennifer's hands, but which will she choose to lend her formidable strength?

Part 4 in Jennifer's stories. Best Babysitter, Settling In, and Galaxia's Equestria all come before it.
(current cover is just temporary while the artist finalizes it)

Chapters (3)
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Comments ( 33 )

adventure yohoooo! :pinkiehappy:

YES! The next part is out! Faving!!!!:pinkiecrazy: I have to wonder how in the world you are able to come up with so many great stories though *stares at Pchn00 with suspicion*. Anyways on to the BIG question and that question is...which world should she focus on. To be truthful she can't afford to completely ignore either but if she has no choice i would say earth for a few reasons.
1. The master appears to be a more cruel and ruthless version of discord :pinkiegasp: while the lich is more obssesed with experimentation then actual takeover
2. Due to being a chaos user the master has a greater chance of discovering how to get to equestria becoming a threat to BOTH worlds
3. The Lich while individually is more powerful then the master now that he has galaxia's body will be weakened on earth and as such not as much of a threat to it.
4. There is no magic on earth and Chaos magic tends to completely overwhelm technology.

That's just my opinion and I am aware that I am making more then a few assumptions :derpytongue2:.

Keep up the good work and let the insanity commence!

3101374
Well chapter 1 should be out ehh... maybe tomorrow afternoon/eveningish. So some stuff'll be answered already there.
As to how I pump em out so fast, I'm sick a lot. Leaves me with a lot of free time that I mostly fill with writing lol

3100550
Indeed. :o

Wait, the Lich? I thought it was nightmare moon, or who else was revived with an glowing green star of magic?:unsuresweetie:

3102712
Thaaaat is somepony else which will come up later in this story, and feature prominently in the sixth and final story about Jennifer.

:rainbowderp: It's Vi the Piltover enforcer!! :pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

I'm lovin this part already!!!

3105252
Yeah kinda. The weapon and name I totally ripped off, but she's definitely not a cop haha (Vi's my absolute fave champ in LoL right now :x)

3105340 To be honest vi from the game isn't much of a cop either lol. The only reason she joined was because she liked the idea of beating up criminals and getting paid to do it. After all her motto is "punch first...ask questions while punching". (I have too many fav champs in that game XD)

3105360
That MIGHT be my favorite part of selecting her is hearing her say that.

She should save Earth. More known population if fan theories are anything to go by, and thus more lives saved.

All I can do is cheer in happiness knowing I'm not the only one who uses the name Galaxia when speaking about the royal family :pinkiehappy:(*squeaky sound*):pinkiehappy:

lol they're gonna go through whatever portal they open and be like "didn't we already do this... oh well back to rescuing Jubilant from insane mad scientists again..."

They called their resistance group the pegasisters? Oh well.

I get the feeling some of these people may become the equivalents to the Elements of Harmony... I see Applejack and Fluttershy for sure. Maybe Earth will get some Harmony magic to beat down the bad guys with? :pinkiehappy:

3155016
I thought calling them that was cute. >_>

Yeah, those are definitely going to be the human Elements of Harmony.

Finally I caught up! You write too fast XD
Ok, just kidding, go on at your pace :twilightsmile:

about Galaxia's Equestria, it ended a bit hastly in my opinion, yet it was a grat fic with a grand ending :pinkiehappy:

About Heart Divided, it's promising, even if with some typing errors :derpytongue2:

Keep up the good work :pinkiesmile:

was still good to read for unedited hehe
funny how this story goes ... i wonder why Luna and the others don't just search for the doors that Suprise creates ... at least Lyra got the "find-it" spell ?!

i'm looking forward to the next chapter and when Celestia makes her turn...

You keep saying your editor isn't editing for you. I could help out if you want.:trixieshiftright:

I've found quite a bit of comma errors...

I'm a hunter, not a psychologist

Come on, my ride's not too far."

Jesus, is she always such a heavy sleeper?"

were inlaid in the wings

Oh yes, just a moment

Horseapples, you don't need to jump down my throat like that."

Shoot, if y'did whatcha did back on m'family ranch drunk I can't wait t'see whatcha got when yer sober."

OR

Shoot. If y'did whatcha did back on m'family ranch drunk I can't wait t'see whatcha got when yer sober."

Both work.

"C'mon, time to run!"

Oh, and there's also this bit here:

and rendered gunpowder inert

Gunpowder is rarely used in bullets anymore, and even then only in civilian hand made products. The most used are actually Cordite or the Improved Military Rifle smokeless compounds - specifically WC844 and WC 846 - so even if gunpowder was rendered inert, most military guns would still work.

Hope all this helps!

More errors for you, considering your editor is being a lazy bum....

Really you don’t need to go to any trouble on our account.”

Comma between 'Really' and 'you'.

“Yeah it’s hers.”

Comma between 'Yeah' and 'It's'.

The Princess’ mother returned from her banishment. Because of me,

You should restucture this bit, because you shouldn't start a sentence with 'because'.

I couldn’t trust Luna told me to keep away from something for a good reason.”

Do you mean "I couldn't trust Luna to keep me..." or something else?

Literally I mean

Comma after Literally

around ehr throat

Misspell 'her'

Jennifer you can’t blame yourself for what happened.

Comma after Jennifer, I do believe. Could be fine without it, though.

Let’s take her to room C. It’s got a little space I think.”

This here could have been done differently, something like: "Let's take her to room C, it's got a little space I believe."
Or You could just be missing a comma after the word space.

Hope I helped you while your editor is dealing with stuff!

Lab

Aww, that's all for now? That's a bummer.

Tell you what, if you get back to work, so will I :P

4366580
I've actually got the next chapter of this coming soon :o

Lab

4367567 Good to hear. I am looking forward to it very much. If there's anything I can do to expedite the process feel free to ask; I actually have credentials ^_^

I have spent the last few days reading what you have written for this story since I first fav'd the frist story a year and a half ago, ignoring my stories during the time to catch up with this amazing story, geeat job and I hope that more is coming my way

Its a shame that this one has languished so. catching one in the middle, and then stepping back, todays been a right read to catch it all up. I do hope this wont fade into obscurity with the series you have written.

It's a shame this series is dead. Lots of potenial and momentum, plenty of conflict, yet you never made it past all the bumps to get back to the nice 'slice of life' adventuring. If you ever felt like going back to this to write adventure stuff, you could always make an alternative ending for 'Settling In' (the ending all the prophetic characters were expecting, with Discord and Jen defeating Galaxia) and just start a new fic from there. Jen's a nice character, when you don't mire her story in such a huge amount of convoluted melodrama. I liked the premise of GE, but the tone really doesn't fit with the first two stories.

Anyways, I know you have like 5 other mostly popular fics that haven't been updated in a year or so, so I'm guessing you won't revisit this 'verse. All the same, if you are still writing and got bored, I'd definitely read a series of one-shots with Jen post-... all of reality being at war. Just sayin'.:pinkiesmile:

7725868
I'm actually leaning more toward dropping the more popular ones in favor of picking up Jen's stories again. I really enjoyed writing her story over the other stuff. The Mass Effect one was supposed to be a goofy one shot that ended up exploding in popularity.

7727138

Sweet! Yeah, I actually read bits of the Mass Effect one before finding the Jen stories. For what it is, it is good, although I personally don't feel like the ME-verse meshes well with MLP. Stuff like a star that orbits a planet doesn't seem like it would have been missed by one or multiple iterations of galactic civilization, and biotics already fill the 'pseudo-magic' niche. Some of the 'Legion in Equestria' ones are a bit fun to read, though.

While it's probably far, far, too late to say this as the last chapter was back in 2013... I would like to also express my interest in seeing this series continue. I enjoyed reading the first three stories, though the decision to move some of the plot points into side stories (Umbra and Jen resolving their conflict comes to mind) with out any warning was frustrating. Jen has grown up a lot from the first story and experienced more than she could have ever hoped, but at a large cost. It would be a shame for her story to end here.

8233414
It's on the schedule. I'm finishing up two of my other fics now, then this is on the list. Jen's stories are my personal favorite and I really want to finish her whole tale up. I have one fic plotted out after this one, then the final sixth story is in the planning stages.

8235000
Excellent! Glad to hear Jen will be making a comeback. I look forward to reading more of her story when it continues :twilightsmile:

Looking forward to future chapters of this story, a great start has left me coveting more.:twilightsmile:

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