• Published 24th Feb 2012
  • 9,255 Views, 163 Comments

Big Macintosh with Realistic Eeyuping and Nopeing Action - Glint



Applejack takes it upon herself to get Big Macintosh a date with one of her friends.

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Pinkie's Perfect Park Picnic

Twilight caught Pinkie Pie at Sugar Cube Corner, eating a midmorning snack during the lull that followed the breakfast rush. She was cheerful, and excited to help her in any way.

“Oh, I’m so excited!” she beamed. “Isn’t this exciting, Mrs. Cake?”

Mrs. Cake may have nodded once as she quietly continued to clean up the counter top.

Without pausing an instant, she continued, “Of course I’ll help you, Twilight! You know that I’m always ready to help you in any way!”

Twilight glanced down at 44 Fabulous First Dates, then back at Pinkie. She began, “Okay, we need –”

“So, watcha need?” Pinkie Pie interrupted, her face hovering over the book.

Twilight tightened her lips and took a deep breath. Pinkie Pie was actually remaining silent, and watching Twilight with bated breath. She continued, “Applejack and I are worried about Big Macintosh.”

She paused for a moment, prepared for Pinkie Pie to interject her observations on Big Macintosh. Instead, she took a bite off of a cherry Danish, her big gleaming eyes staying fixed on Twilight Sparkle.

“He’s been working too hard on family business, and not taking enough time for himself. We’re worried that he has nopony in his life outside of his family.” She paused again. “We’re getting him to take the afternoon off and take a break down at Duck Lake Park.”

Without expressing her feelings on ducks, lakes, or parks, Pinkie Pie popped the last bite of Danish in her mouth and nodded. A single crumb fell out of the corner of her mouth, landing on Cosmare's "Top Tips for Fun in the Sun."

Twilight blew the crumb away, and resumed warily, “We were hoping you could pack a snack for the two of you and meet him at the park. You know, eat, relax, chat, feed the ducks, that sort of thing.”

Pinkie Pie began shaking. She swallowed the last of her Danish, and then exploded into action.

“Oh wow! You bet I can do that sort of thing! If there’s one thing Pinkie Pie knows almost as good as parties, it’s picking quality baked goods for snacking! Isn’t that right, Mrs. Cake?” She took a big breath, and without even looking to see Mrs. Cake nod silently, she continued. “And can I get some two-day old bread to feed the ducks, and oh, I haven’t worn this bonnet of mine in forever; it’s perfect for the park!”

Pinkie Pie bounced all over Sugar Cube Corner, grabbing a little basket lined with frilly lace, and tossing in some old rolls, fresh pastries, an old-fashioned gray bonnet, and a variety of colored ribbons (“Because this bonnet’s so bland without them!” Pinkie exclaimed).

“Having a relaxing afternoon in the park is a wonderful idea,” she shouted gleefully, “This will be like a date for just the two of us! I’m so excited!”

Twilight Sparkle heaved a sigh of relief and turned her attention back to her book. “Now, there are a few ideas on what to do in the park. There’s a gazebo that overlooks Duck Lake, and something special can happen under the shelter of the gazebo.” She ran her eyes down the page and blushed a little.

“Sheltering gazebo? Great plan. Got it,” said Pinkie Pie, pulling her head out of a cabinet, knocking stacks of napkins and paper plates on the floor. “C’mon, keep ‘em coming.”

“Wow, Pinkie’s really into this,” Twilight said to herself, smiling. “I think it’ll actually work. Okay Pinkie, you need a blanket or tablecloth.”

“One step ahead of you, Twilight,” said Pinkie Pie, picking up a white tablecloth embroidered with pink and blue balloons, and stuffing it in the basket.

“Keep ‘em coming!”


That afternoon, Applejack trotted up to the family apple stand, and stopped, her mouth agape.

Big Macintosh was running the stand, eeyuping his way through many a transaction, wearing a wide-brimmed straw hat on his head.

Applejack stomped up to him. “Why the hay are you wearing that old thing?” she quizzed, staring daggers at the hat.

Big Macintosh rolled his eyes upward. The sky was perfectly clear, and the sun was shining brightly.

“Keepin’ the sun out of your eyes?” She said.

Big Macintosh looked blankly at Applejack, not even saying a single word to her.

“You know that makes you look like a hick, don’t you?” she advised.

“Eeyup.”

Applejack looked her brother straight in the eye. “You ought to take a break now.”

“Nope.”

“Consarn it, I have a friend who’s concerned about you working too hard. She’s got a nice snack ready for you, and you’re gonna eat it!” she proclaimed, still looking him in the eye.

Big Macintosh opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it.

“She’s waiting in Duck Lake Park. You know where that is, right?” Without waiting for him to respond, she continued, “I’ll take over the apple stand. Just get over there, alright?”

Big Macintosh again opened his mouth to say something, and again thought better of it.

“G’wan! Skedaddle!” she said firmly.

Big Macintosh closed his mouth, raised an eyebrow at Applejack, and turned to leave.

“Take this apple juice with you,” she said, putting a bottle and a couple cups in his saddle pack. She also swiped the hat off his head, and unceremoniously stuffed it in his pack.

Big Macintosh sighed, and moseyed off toward the park.


When Big Macintosh arrived at the park, he heard a cheery “Yoo-hoo!” from near the lake.

There stood Pinkie Pie, wearing an old-fashioned light gray bonnet with blue ribbons. A cloth was spread out on the ground beside her, covered with sweet snacks.

Big Macintosh scanned the park, looking from left to right. The sun shone brightly on some ducks that were landing on the lake. A gray pegasus with a blonde mane was poking around a little round white building that was open on all sides. Pinkie Pie stood waving at him. A few ponies with musical instruments were talking to each other at the other end of the park.

Seeing no other options, Big Macintosh walked up to Pinkie Pie. From his pack, he produced a bottle with a drawing of an apple, and two cups. He set them gently on the cloth.

“Good afternoon, Mac!” she squealed.

“Eeyup.”

Pinkie Pie looked at him sternly, and approached very close to him. The edge of her bonnet brushed against his ear, causing it to twitch slightly.

“Oh, Macintosh, you big silly,” she said smirking, “Honestly, ‘eeyup?’ What kind of greeting is that? You can’t just say ‘eeyup’ when somepony says ‘good afternoon’ to you.”

“Nope?”

“Nope! Let’s try this again,” she said, again taking on a very serious expression. “I say, ‘Good afternoon, Mac!’ and you say …”

“Good … afternoon Pinkie?” said Big Macintosh, taking a step back.

Pinkie’s expression brightened. “Yay!” she beamed. Pinkie picked up a cupcake with pink and blue frosting, and held it in front of his face. “Here, have a bite!” she offered.

Big Macintosh again scanned the park. The ducks were swimming in circles on the pond. The band was approaching the building, as the gray pegasus set up some music stands inside. Nopony was paying any attention to them. He shrugged, and used his teeth to grab the cupcake out of her hoofs, putting it all in his mouth at once. He then swallowed it in one gulp.

Pinkie Pie sat down on her haunches right net to him, poured some apple juice, and sighed contentedly. “Oh, Macintosh, it’s such a beautiful day, isn’t it?”

“Eeyup,” he said. “It’s nice,” he added hastily.

The band filled up the little building, each member preparing a stringed or brass instrument. The gray pegasus produced her own trumpet and joined them. In front of them stood a dignified looking navy blue unicorn with white hair, and a conductor’s baton for a cutie mark. He levitated an identical-looking baton, tapped it on his music stand, and the band began to play.

When she heard the song, she perked up her ears, and hastily chewed and swallowed the rest off her muffin. “Oh, Macintosh!” she exclaimed, a few crumbs falling from the edges of her mouth. “I love this song!”

And in a bright and cheery voice, she began to sing:

Everpony loves somepony sometime
Everypony falls in love somehow
Something in your eyes just told me
That sometime is now.

As the band launched into the refrain, Pinkie gushed, “Oh, this song is such a classic. Everypony loves it.”

“Eeyup.” Big Macintosh waited for Pinkie Pie to continue, but instead, she just raised an eyebrow at him. “Err … Everypony loves ‘Everypony Loves Somepony,’” he managed.

“You know this song too, don’t you?” she enthused.

“Eeyup.”

“So what are you waiting for?” she asked.

Big Macintosh rolled his eyes, and took a deep breath. In a rich bass voice, he sang:

Everypony finds somepony someplace
There's no telling where love may appear
Something all around is saying
That someplace is here.

“Yay!” squealed Pinkie Pie. “Isn’t that just the dreamiest song that puts you in the loviest doviest mood?”

“Nope.”

Pinkie Pie didn’t hear his response, as she was looking around the park, eyeing every tree. “Twilight said something about taking shelter under a gazebo,” she murmured. “Hey Big Mac! What kind of tree is that?” she said, pointing a hoof at a large tree whose branches cast a shadow over the edge of lake.

“That’s an oak,” he said plainly.

“No, the one behind it,” she said, taking a couple steps toward it.

“That’s another oak,” he said, pulling out his hat, and putting it on his head.

“Aww …” she said, dejected. “And that one’s a pine, right?”

“Eeyup.”

“Are we ever going to find a nice gazebo to take shelter from the sun and maybe have a little bit of privacy?” she whined.

He picked up a big cookie and cast his eyes toward the band. They were still in the building, doing a rendition of “Boogie Woogie Bugle Colt.”

“Nope,” said Big Macintosh.

“Oh, phooey,” said Pinkie Pie. When she turned to face him, the edge of her bonnet brushed the brim of his hat. “Oh, a hat! What’s this for?”

Big Macintosh looked blankly at her for a full minute, but this did not diminish the eager look on her face. “Keeping the sun out of my eyes,” he finally said.

“Oh, it’s your own special shelter from the sun,” she said, nodding. Then, to herself, she said, “I got it! That’s what Twilight was talking about. The magic happens under his hat!”

She then undid her bonnet, and quickly darted under his hat. She planted a big kiss on his cheek, exclaiming “Mwah!”

The wind caught Pinkie’s bonnet, and it tumbled toward into lake. Big Macintosh sat stock-still, his eyes suddenly wide.

The gray pegasus flew on top of the building and launched into a solo. Her eyes shook wildly as her hooves tapped furiously, much to the consternation of the director. Big Macintosh’s eyes remained fixed straight ahead.

He dropped his cookie into his cup of apple juice, knocking it over, and spilling it all over Pinkie’s slice of cake. But Pinkie didn’t notice. She was refastening her bonnet, her hooves wet in the edge of the lake.

Big Macintosh watched in stunned silence (rather than his usual calm silence) as Pinkie gleefully ripped up some stale rolls and tossed the pieces near the lakeside. Ducks came up out of the water. They pecked greedily at the bread as Pinkie Pie crept up on them. One duck noticed her and pecked at her with an angry “quack!” Pinkie angrily quacked back, and stomped a hoof down on the ground, sending the ducks fleeing.

Pinkie Pie frolicked with the ducks, splashing muddy water all over the ducks, herself, and her nice bonnet. Big Macintosh regained his composure. He picked out half of the remaining snacks, stuffed them all into his mouth at once, and walked away, chewing slowly.


Soon, Big Macintosh arrived at the playground outside of the school. Apple Bloom and her two best friends were huddled together, whispering something. He paused near them for a moment.

“Oh, good afternoon Big Macintosh,” called Cheerilee from the entrance to the schoolhouse.

Big Macintosh automatically opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. After a moment’s thought, he smiled and said “Good afternoon, Miss Cheerilee.”