My Old Apple Acre Home Part 10
Rainbow Dash was truly alone. Rubbing her face that was slowly returning to its normal color, she sat under the tree Applejack had just been under. She was sure now that nothing would change how Applejack was feeling. She wondered if maybe it hadn’t been the right time, and giving in to the voice that had plagued her mind had really been the best option. The voice was no longer talking to her either, which only served to make her loneliness worse. Normally a thought such as that would have worried anypony, but Dash was sure she had nowhere else she could go.
At the moment, Dash was sure she didn’t want to talk to Twilight Sparkle. She didn’t blame Twilight for everything, how could she? Regardless, she knew now was not the time to go back, especially if something did change inside her distraught lover and she decided to come back to find Dash. Rarity was sure to hate her now, if she didn’t already. Big Macintosh was staying with Fluttershy, and Dash didn’t want to even chance going around him. She’d never seen Big Mac when he was mad, but she could only guess it wouldn’t be good. Dash considered finding Pinkie Pie, but brinigng her problems to Pinkie would likely only serve to depress the pink earth pony.
Looking at the moon, high in the sky, Dash thought about how many times in the past few weeks she’d seen Luna’s moon like this. She thought about one of the last dreams she’d had, when she’d flown away from her cloud home and screamed into the night. She kept thinking about if she’d just kept flying. If she’d let herself decide she was crazy, that the voices in her mind and the pictures in her dreams were not normal, and just flown away before she hurt Applejack anymore. Sadly, her sanity had caused more harm than she could have imagined.
Dash didn’t want to cry anymore. She’d always been a strong pony, and was sure she’d shed more tears since the fire than she’d been able to cry in her entire life. She stood up strongly, and vowed that she’d give it one more shot to fix things with Applejack when the sun rose in the morning. Dash flapped her wings open, and soared into the night towards her home.
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Dash wouldn’t find out until morning, but as the night went on, a certain four ponies in Ponyville would receive letters from one of their best friends. Each letter varied in content, and all were short on details for why they were sent. Even so, by the time they were all read, it was too late to do anything. All most of them could do was ask one question: Why?
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Morning came to Ponyville as it had every day before it. Despite her ability to stay strong in the face of losing everything, Rainbow Dash hadn’t slept all night. Her worries had begun to catch up to her. As soon as she saw that the sun had come up, she headed out in to Ponyville. With no idea where Applejack could have gone, Dash decided she’d have to start with the place she most dreaded: Fluttershy’s. It was an odd thing to be so scared of going to see Fluttershy, the pony least likely to hurt anything. Dash was certain though that Big Macintosh may not be so forgiving.
Soaring over the town, heading for the cottage that Fluttershy shared with as many animals as she could manage, Dash hoped she could find some trace of where Applejack had gone. It didn’t take long before she was standing at the end of the path leading up to the door. She fluttered up to the porch, and stood for a few moments, deciding if it was in her best interest to even try. She decided that she had to find out something, and rapt on the door with one hoof loudly. Fluttershy answered, but seeing who was standing on her doorstep, she quickly moved away and Big Macintosh stepped out.
“Mornin’ Miss Rainbow Dash,” Big Macintosh said in a rather friendly tone.
“I figure you already know, but I’m looking for Applejack,” Dash didn’t waste any time in asking.
“Well now,” he started, his expression becoming a bit more grim, “Ah can’t say Ah know where she’s gone ta. But Ah know she ain’t in Ponyville anymore.”
Big Mac turned and walked inside for a moment, then came back with a letter clutched in his teeth. He lowered his head so the letter was eye level with Dash. Slowly, she read the black inked words carefully to herself. The letter read:
To All My Friends in Ponyville,
Although some of us may not be on the best terms right now, I just wanted everypony to know how much I’ve enjoyed being your friend. Its with a pretty heavy heart I’m announcing my leaving of Ponyville. Too much has happened, and theres too much on my mind right now to even continue a normal life here, so for now I’m going to go. I may come back soon, but I wouldn’t worry about me if I don’t. I’m not going to say where I’m going, because even I’m not sure, but its for my own sanity. I’ll miss everypony.
-Applejack
Dash was a tad surprised to see it hadn’t been written the way Applejack usually talked, but she assumed Spike or whoever helped her write the letter didn’t take the time to copy her inflection.
“But you know where she’s going, don’t you Big Macintosh?” Dash asked sadly.
“If Ah do, it ain’t mah place to tell you,” he told her sternly.
“I can tell you know everything,” Dash put her ears down and looked sadly at Fluttershy’s porch, “I know you probably would like to beat me into a blue puddle on the ground.”
“Despite my feelin’s on what has happened with mah sister, I ain’t no mare beater. Nopony deserves somethin’ like that. But maybe all this’ll make ya think more about your actions, Miss Dash.”
With that, Big Macintosh retired into the house, and closed the door, leaving Dash to feel more alone than ever.
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Asleep that night in her cloud bed, despite the voice having purged itself from her head, Rainbow Dash had one final dream regarding the fire. She could see everything that had happened on that day that seemed so long ago, when Applejack had nearly lost everything. Only this time, something seemed different.
Applejack came trotting out, soaking wet from Dash’s rain clouds, looking absolutely miserable. Behind her, the fire still raged. The Pegasus ponies hadn’t arrived to put the blaze out yet. Applejack turned to Rainbow Dash.
“Why couldn’t ya tell me, sugarcube?” she said sadly.
“AJ, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for…” she was cut off quickly.
“ Why did ya have ta wait till everythin’ was so far gone?”
Dash didn’t have an answer. The part of herself that she had considered crazy had all along been right in condemning her for her actions, truly striving to make her admit her guilt and try to make things right.
“I told you, I’m sorry,” Dash told her, staring into the green eyes of the earth pony as the fire crept closer and closer.
“Maybe, in there, might have hurt less,” Applejack turned her head toward the ground.
Without any warning, Rainbow Dash watched in horror as Applejack quickly galloped away back towards the blaze. Despite Dash’s protests, she would not come back. Headlong she ran into the flames, which charred her coat instantly. Soon she was gone completely, engulfed in the orange inferno. The brown hat she always wore burst back out of the flames, burning quickly as it soared over Dash’s head and turned to ash.
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Dash awoke, feeling guiltier than ever. She couldn’t imagine that she might have hurt Applejack so bad she might want to die instead. Her letter hadn’t implied such a thing, but Dash’s mind was running with the notion regardless. Dash sat up on her cloud bed, and looked across the room to the table she had made to sit in the room. Applejack’s brown hat still sat on the dresser. Dash looked away from it and slumped back onto the clouds, trying to clear her ehad for even a moment, and get some more sleep.
Soon she was out again. She wouldn’t realize it until later, but had she stayed awake even a few minutes longer, she might not have lost the last piece of everything she had lost. The enchantments that had held Applejack’s hat for so long in the clouds finally gave out, and slowly the hat sank through the clouds. Once through the bottom, the hat soared away, caught by the wind that blew through the cold Equestrian night.
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Much like the seasons, many things remained the same in Ponyville, and yet many things began to change as well. As he’d told Applejack on the last day she’d remained in Ponyville, Big Macintosh and Applebloom eventually packed up their things and left for a plot of land in Appleoosa, after making a stop of course to drop Granny Smith off with the Orange family in Manehatten. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle exchanged tearful goodbyes with their friend, vowing to visit often so they could continue to crusade for their cutie marks. A tearful Fluttershy was also left behind as they departed, wishing they’d turn back and come back to her house, hoping that she wouldn’t be left behind. With so many animals to care for, Fluttershy couldn’t move herself, and was too left behind in Ponyville.
Everyday for weeks, Rainbow Dash made trips further and further, looking for any trace of where Applejack had gone. On days she was feeling particularly in good spirits, she would perform her trademark sonic rainboom, hoping that Applejack would see it and investiagate to see what was going on. Sadly, nothing ever came of her trips, and she would usually return to Ponyville feeling empty and alone. Eventually she began to visit Twilight again, and with time the two had become something of a couple. However, things never felt quite right to Dash, and she continued to search when she could. Whatever spark she had felt when kissing Twilight on those nights before had vanished. Dash hated to admit that that spark may well have been from the excitement that she could have been caught kissing another mare while still being in her relationship.
It wasn’t that Dash didn’t like Twilight either, she was still one of Rainbow Dash’s best friends, but Dash could never truly bring herself to say she loved the purple unicorn. Within a few months, coupled with intense arguing that arose between the two, Rainbow Dash ended the relationship, and decided to sever her own ties with Ponyville. It ended nearly a year to the day Applejack had left town.
She flew to her cloud house and gathered what belongings she had. Dash placed them on a small cloud she could easily pull behind her, and flew away from Ponyville. She’d not see the town again for the next two years.
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Rainbow Dash could hear the roar of the crowd from outside the waiting area, as she prepared herself for what she considered to be the biggest moment of her life. The problem was, no matter how ready she was, she just couldn’t seem to stay focused. When the letter came the day before, things that she had finally been able to put out of her mind after three years came flooding back, and now here she was, ready to perform in front of the Wonderbolts for a chance to join them, and all she could think about was Ponyville. Just outside of where she was, Dash could see Soarin’ and Spitfire standing ready to judge the contestants.
She kept thinking back to the night before. She’d just returned to her new cloud home that floated alongside the city of Cloudsdale, when a spark of green flame lit up her home, and the message had appeared. Instantly Dash knew where it had come from, so she carefully pulled the red ribbon off and let the paper unroll itself on her table. She began to read it with great interest, noting that it was surprising to see that it had been written exactly the way a certain pony spoke.
Dear Ms. Dash,
Despite the differences that we’ve all had, Ah’m askin’ if you would be so kind as ta join us in Ponyville. I assume ya still live there, but if not, don’t be makin’ the journey on my account. Tragically, our beloved Granny Smith passed away recently in Manehatten, and we’re holdin’ services in Ponyville tomorrow afternoon, with a get together at Sugarcube Corner afterwards. Despite what she seemed, she thought a lot of ya, and knew how happy ya’ll made Applejack. So please, if ya would join us in this tiem of mournin’.
-Big Macintosh
Dash couldn’t believe it. For her, this couldn’t have come at a worse time. Dash sat down on the clouds and thought hard on what to do. Memories had begun to flow back. She remembered the good times with her friends in Ponyville, the adventures they’d had. She remembered how they’d hung out all around town, and laughed and just had fun. And then Dash remembered Applejack. Although things had gone bad three years ago, it wasn’t until recently Rainbow Dash had even been able to stop thinking of her. The prospect of maybe seeing her again lodged itself in Rainbow’s mind, bringing with it waves of confusion.
Now in the present, lost in thought, Dash missed the first time her name was announced to perform. She might have missed her turn completely, had one of the pegasi from the stadium staff soon come to find her, and prodded her to go out. Dash stepped out into the light of the stadium, thousands of ponies cheering and waving around her. She could distinctly hear several cheering her name.
Despite everything, her mind wasn’t here. It had already made its way back to Ponyville, long before her physical form would. With a sigh, Rainbow Dash decided to make the hardest decision of her life. With a flap of her wings, Dash flew up to cloud where the Wonderbolts were sitting.
“What’s up Rainbow Dash?” Spitfire asked her.
“I’m sorry,” Dash said with a great deal of reluctance, “But as happy as I am for the chance, I’ll have to try again some other time.”
Obviously confused, Spitfire tried to ask Rainbow Dash just what exactly what was going on, but was left with a wisp of white cloud as Rainbow Dash rocketed from her spot and shot away towards Ponyville.
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Soaring over her old home town, Rainbow Dash took in the sights of the changes that had come there since she’d gone two years ago. Although the tracks wound through the town, a new train station had been built on the outskirts, allowing easier travel for those looking to go to Appleoosa or any of the other neighboring cities of Equestria. The one thing that surprised Dash was the site of Sweet Apple acres. Despite the new buildings never being built, a completely new crop of apple trees had sprung up, nearly returning the orchard to its former glory. Dash could only assume that Pinkie Pie and caramel’s work had been the one successful part of the failed plan she’d had back then.
When Dash arrived at the building where the funeral was being held, she decided to wait the service out, for fear of causing any sort of incident. She watched through the windows as one pony after another said words in honor of Granny Smith’s memory. Soon, Big Macintosh spoke, and once his words were said, Applejack stood to speak. Next to her, all of their old friends, including Twilight Sparkle sat, solemn expressions across their faces. Fluttershy was visibly more upset than the others, but that didn’t surprise Dash.
Before Applejack went up, Twilight levitated a small bag from her back. Dash couldn’t quite make out what it was, but waited to hear what Applejack had to say.
“Granny Smith was one of the most wonderful ponies in all of mah life,” Applejack started.
Dash sat and watched the mare she’d once loved speak on and on about her grandmother, hanging on to every word she spoke. Dash could feel the sadness welling up inside her, though she couldn’t be sure if it was seeing the orange earth pony again, or the truly sad fact that Granny Smith had passed on.
When Applejack was finished, she went over to the coffin where Granny Smith lay, and planted a final kiss on her forehead.
Dash couldn’t hear her, but gently, Applejack whispered, “Ah hope ya was proud of me. Ah wish ya could’a met my little Apple…” Applejack couldn’t finish as she began to break down into tears.
Big Macintosh and Applebloom came to her sides, and helped her away. Slowly she walked away and took her seat once again by Twilight Sparkle until the rest of the service had concluded.
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There she was, amidst all their friends and family. Applejack stood, staring silently out the window of Sugarcube Corner. Off in the distance, the apple trees that Dash had passed on her way into town could be seen reaching into the afternoon sky. All Dash could think of was how good she still looked, the briefest signs of age only adding to her beauty. It was only as Dash got closer that she noticed more had happened to Applejack than aging. Rainbow Dash could finally get a clear view of the bag that twilight had taken during the funeral, and it was something Dash hadn’t expected. Nestled in a special carrier on Applejack’s back was a very small cyan earth filly who couldn’t have even been more than a few months old. She slept soundly on her mother’s back, unaware of the grief-stricken ponies around her.
The sight of this made Dash even more hesitant to approach her. Thoughts about if Applejack was with anypony else began running through Dash’s mind, giving her the idea that maybe she should just leave before anyone recognized her. She didn’t want to scare Applejack off or cause a fight, especially in the midst of so much grief. Suddenly, a voice from behind surprised Rainbow Dash surprised her.
“Hey Rainbow Dash,” Twilight Sparkle approached her cautiously, with Rarity not far behind.
“Uh, hey Twilight. I didn’t expect to see you. Or expect you to be talking to me,” Dash said honestly.
“I know things weren’t exactly great the last time we saw each other, but I want to start again. I miss my friends more than anything in the world Rainbow Dash. When we all began to split up, I hated myself. I went back to Canterlot with Spike, and confessed everything to the Princess. I was sure she was going to banish me from her court, but all she did was smile and tell me that ‘If I was truly sorry, then all friendships could be mended in time.’ So I came back to Ponyville, and started trying to fix everything. I wasn’t sure you’d be here, but I’ve been thinking of a thousand different things to say to you.”
Dash smiled. She hadn’t expected this, but she assumed that it was a similar reason that she had had the opportunity to be so close to Applejack during the funeral. Before Dash could say anything, Rarity came next to Twilight to join the conversation.
“Rainbow Dash, you look like you’ve been doing well,” Rarity said formally.
“Not bad,” Dash grinned much like she used to, “Been busy as ever with my Wonderbolts training.”
“Same old Rainbow Dash,” Rarity beamed, “But Rainbow, I must speak my own apologies. I too was not the best friend I could be before you left Ponyville.”
“We never talked between…well you know, and the time Twilight and I broke up.”
“Yes, I remembered darling. I had my reasons. To be honest, I was very upset with what you did to Applejack. That much I’m sure you could tell,” Dash nodded as she continued, “ But there was more to it than that. I admit, I was a little jealous.”
Dash stood confused for a moment until Rarity get close to Twilight, and nuzzled Twilight’s neck. Twi accepted and closed her eyes as she lifted her head to let Rarity in closer. Dash smirked a bit, a bit surprised by the couple.
“Twilight of course still has a lot of learning to do before she is as acceptably proper as myself,” Rarity pulled away and said.
Twilight squinted back at the white unicorn, prompting Rarity to smile embarrassedly. Dash turned away to stare back at Applejack, who still remained silent by the window.
“She’s not with anyone you know,” Rarity spoke up, instantly aware of what Dash was thinking.
“We were all a little surprised to see Applejack back like that,” Twilight admitted, “But wait till you see her! She’s the most adorable little filly.”
Twilight realized how awkward things would likely still be between the two, and slunk back after catching her mistake.
“Its fine Twi,” Dash told her, “I just want to go talk to her so badly.”
“Then go do it!” Rarity gave her a little push, “It’s not hard to tell there’s still something there, Rainbow Dash. You just have to make the first move.”
Dash felt a little better after hearing her words, and with a little more confidence, Dash left the two unicorns behind, and headed towards Applejack.
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The walk to the spot where Applejack stood seemed like an eternity to Rainbow Dash. Everything around her seemed to be moving so slowly. She could see some ponies laughing, others crying. Pinkie Pie and Caramel were chatting with Fluttershy in one corner of the room. Dash hadn’t gotten the chance to see either of them yet, but she feared that if she didn’t make her move now, she wouldn’t ever get the chance. Soon she was standing right behind her, as Applejack continued to stare out the window.
“Uh…hey, AJ,” Dash squeaked out.
Applejack jumped at the sound of Dash’s voice, clearly not expecting to hear it. The little filly yawned, and rolled over in her bag, but remained asleep.
“R-Rainbow Dash! Ah…Ah didn’t expect to see….who told ya what happened?” she stammered.
“Big Macintosh,” Dash said confidently, watching Applejack’s eyes gaze around until she centered on her brother and stared daggers into him.
“ Ah don’t know if…” Applejack trailed off, clearly at a loss for words.
“Look, I know now’s not exactly a good time, but I want to talk AJ. I don’t want to cause any trouble though,” Dash told her.
Applejack sighed. Her mind was racing, being face to face with her old lover again. In the emotional state she was in, she really didn’t need the surprise at the moment.
“Alright, meet me outside in five minutes,” Applejack told her.
Dash nodded and started for the door.
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When she was sure Rainbow had left, Applejack went and found Big Macintosh. He’d joined the conversation with Pinkie and Fluttershy, clearly trying to resolve whatever issues his leaving had caused between him and the yellow Pegasus. Applejack pulled him aside for a moment.
“Ya’ll told Rainbow Dash?” Applejack said, tears in her eyes resulting from a mixture of the shock of seeing Dash, and the pain she was already feeling from losing Granny Smith.
“Now Applejack, ya’ll know Granny Smith would have wanted her here too. She loved all the ponies of Ponyville.”
For a moment Applejack looked hurt and confused, but all she could do was accept the fact that her brother was right.
“Yeah, I guess,” Applejack said quietly.
Big Mac smiled, and raised his hoof to pat Applejack’s shoulder. He gave her a brief hug, then reached over and stroked the mane of the sleeping filly.
“No matter what, she’d a been proud of ya,” Big Macintosh said.
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Outside, Applejack walked up to Rainbow Dash, trying to keep herself from getting too close to the Pegasus. She wanted comfort, but at the moment she wasn’t so sure she wanted it from Rainbow Dash.
“So…” Applejack said, lifting her hoof to wipe the tears away.
“So…” Dash trailed off too, “How’ve things been?”
“Good…well, not really,” she glanced back to check on the little filly, who still remained asleep.
“AJ, I’ve waited a long time to tell you this, but I’m sorry,” Dash started quickly. “There were so many times I wanted to tell you, and just couldn’t. I was going nuts. Then Twilight kissed me and…”
Much like the last time Dash had seen her, Applejack swung her hoof and smacked Dash in the face, sending Rainbow Dash spiraling into the dirt.
“Ouch, what was that?” Dash asked her.
“More Ah should’a given ya two years ago,” Applejack replied scornfully.
Dash took a few moments to recover, continuing to remain on the ground.
“I never said I wanted your forgiveness,” Dash began again, not even completely off of the ground yet.
“Ah never said Ah wouldn’t forgive ya,” Applejack cut in, “But did ya think it would be that easy? After everythin’ we was already going through, and you dropped that on me?”
Dash felt like everything had picked back up, right from where it had been two years earlier. To her, it felt almost right.
More tears began to form in Applejack’s eyes, “Why couldn’t ya tell me, sugarcube? Even Ah don’t think ya could’a expected something like that to happen. Ya were driving yourself crazy over an accident. Don’t think Ah realized that right away either, Ah’ve had a long time to think.”
Dash wasn’t sure what to make of her words. It sounded like Applejack was forgiving her, calling it all an accident. But the rift between them didn’t seem any less big.
“And Ah’ve been through a lot.”
Dash looked to Applejack’s back, where the little cyan filly continued to sleep.
“This is Apple Blitz,” Applejack told Dash, smiling as the little filly finally began to stir.
“But how AJ?” Dash asked.
“Ah was pretty torn up about ya, so when Ah passed through Trottingham, I ran into a stallion. He was a Pegasus, the exact same color as you. His mane was only red, but I couldn’t help but see you in him everytime I looked at him. So Ah got close to him, and just sort of pretended it was you. This stallion was a far cry from ya Rainbow Dash. I guess I’m just not that into the opposite sex,” she said with a small smile.
“He left me anyhow, before Ah knew she was comin’.”
“So…all this time, you still thought about me?” Dash couldn’t help but grin a little, although part of that came from her ego.
“A-A-Ah wanted to work things out, but I heard ya left Ponyville after a while. Fluttershy said you an Twi still kept a thing goin’ for a bit too.”
Dash looked away at that. She figured it would come back to haunt her eventually.
“It wasn’t much AJ, I kept trying to find you the whole time,” Dash tried to tell her.
“We were apart,” Applejack replied, “Ah can’t hold ya for what ya’ll did after I was gone.”
“Ah loved ya Rainbow Dash…Ah…Ah still love ya,” Applejack could barely hold in her tears.
Everything of the day had finally begun to take its toll, and Applejack dropped to the ground, taking care to not shift her foal too much. She sobbed into the dirt as Dash had seen her do before. Rainbow Dash approached her, wanting to hold her in her time of need. Dash sat down on the ground and wrapped her front legs around Applejack’s neck, pulling her gaze up to stare into Rainbow Dash’s eyes.
“Applejack…I’m so sorry, for everything,” Dash started, “But…I want to try and start again. I’ve thought about you for so long. And now you’re here, and I’m here, and I can’t stand to lose you again.”
With those words, Applejack thrust herself forward and kissed Rainbow Dash in what Dash would alter call the most amazing kiss she’d ever experienced. The two locked their lips together for several minutes. Happiness overflowed through Dash, and Applejack could feel the tears that were pouring down Rainbow’s face streaming from Dash’s cheeks and down her own muzzle.
Finally they pulled apart, and everything seemed alright.
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After a few moments in which both mare’s processed what had just happened, Applejack and Rainbow Dash both lifted themselves off the ground. She looked back at her filly, who was now wide awake, and looked somewhat confused at what had just happened in front of her. Applejack knew she was too young to really know anything yet, but the look on Apple Blitz’s face made her chuckle. The filly lifted her head up and yawned, flinging her tiny blonde mane over her shoulder. Rainbow Dash could see tiny red streaks that ran through it. The filly opened her eyes to reveal two big green orbs that made Dash’s heart melt.
Applejack, with a little bit of fidgeting, unstrapped the pack from her back, and let Apple Blitz out onto the earth for a few minutes. She tried to stand on wobbly legs, but soon fell down with all four legs spread in different directions. The dust she kicked up made her sneeze. She shook the her tiny head and rolled over on her back, and began to play with her tail, much like Rarity’s cat did as a kitten.
Both mare’s couldn’t help but smile at the little filly.
“So one more try?” Dash said, sounding happier than she had in a long time.
“No more tries, sugarcube,” Applejack told her, “It’s going to work this time.”
Behind them, the four other friends of the two stared out the windows of Sugarcube Corner, watching as the two mares kissed again, painting a beautiful picture as the sun set behind them.
“Ah love you, Dash,” Applejack said sweetly.
“Ah love you too,” Dash replied.
Together, they watched the sun set as Apple Blitz rolled around in the dirt. In the distance, Sweet Apple acres looked nearly as beautiful as it once had. Applejack hoped that the future would be full of happy memories, like the ones she’d shared with everyone not so long ago, in her Old Apple Acres Home.
(Author’s Note: Well, I hope everyone enjoyed it. I’ve got a lot of errors to go back and fix, and there are still alternate endings and a new fic I’m starting soon after this, so this will still have a few updates. Thanks so much to my prereader Zev, who started about halfway through and it really shows how much better he is at proofreading this than I am. Again, thanks to all my readers, and I hope you continue to read whatever I come out with next.)
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I'm so close to crying right now.
I love you.
This is one of the best stories I've read.
Great job.
I don't know what else to say.
I can't wait to see more from you.
DAWWW
This was so sad
but the ending changed that.
Anytime man. Anytime.
Keep up this amazing work.
The scene with the dream of the fire. . . was the most poignant and heart wrenching scenes I have ever read. There are spelling errors and cliche lines but that doesn't change the pure and unbridled emotion that flows from this story, this is a masterpiece.
Wow, you should write books.
that was so sad. I cried for Twilight, AJ, and Dash.. this was a great read!!
I wont lie I was really hoping for Twi and Dash to win out, and for a while I really thought that was going to happen, but your ending was so sweet. I loved it,
your story was fantastic!
Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps, Claps,
I'm sitting here in my college dorm, trying not to cry because my roommate will never let me live it down. Good Job. so glad i decided to follow this story. X3
I actually felt tears start rolling down my cheeks, I must raise my mood with some music.
Mood Lifting
<slowly stands up, clapping the entire time> oh...sweet celestia, the perfect ending for a magnificent read, i swear my heart just exploded at the end there
the ending was so perfect. i just dont know what to say. its always sad to see an amazing story like this end but at least it was happy ending.
FUCK, I CRIED
DAMMIT I WAS DOING SO GOOD TOO
Oh dear lord I cried.
That was beautiful, excellent work, and the ending was just perfect!
Nope, I'm not reading any alternate endings, sorry, but this ending is the perfect one
This was an emotional rollercoaster for me. You brought out every emotion I have, truly. Thank you so much for writing this.
34526 Trevor, I hope you do keep reading. About halfway through is when i got my prereader, so I know the old chapters still have some flaws I need to go back and fix. I do hope you continue the story. Thanks everyone for reading and enjoying it.
34755 Hey, no problem. I certainly accept that there are some flaws, flaws I'll get back too soon and try to get fixed. As I said before, when I first began I didn't happen to have a pre-reader, so there's a lot of things I'm sure I didn't catch. It's ok on your post, it didn't get me down or anything, but thanks for commenting back and everything.
*slow clap* That sure was something. Goes easily to my top 5 fim fics.
Well i must say : i've been reading a lot of fanfics in this site but i never registred until today, and I've done so now just to congratule the author for this great story.
As for constructive critism, i can offer my feeling of confusion towards the twilight/RD and twi/rarity couple, i felt they were somewhat forced ? the first one for dramatic effect / 3rd act inducer (can't remember the name of this writing tool in english) and the second coupling as a way to say "everything is fine for everyone". Don't misunderstand me, I loved the ending, but i just can't shake this uneasiness about it. I feel the way you handled fluttershy and big mac was much more subbtle, therefore stronger.
And to top it all i started reading this story at the same time you were uploading the final part, so when i got to chapter nine, prepared my self to wait for chap 10 and saw that the story had been updated ...
Again, thanks for this story, can't wait for another one.
I loved this story so much and that little filly was SO CUTE!!! The only real problem that I have that really turns a knife that's jabbed into my stomace was that the filly wasn't Rainbow's, and instead some random colt who abandoned AJ.
To finish I just want to 1up everyone here:
After years of emotional pain and suffering, I have become total resistant to crying from sad stories.
I DIDN'T CRY!!!
And on an ending note:
FUCKING FILLY ISN'T RAINBOWS WHY COULDN'T THEY HAVE SOMETHING DONE THEY MUST HAVE WAS TO DO THAT IN A WORLD WITH MAGIC COME ON I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE THAT BUT IT WAS SO CUTE YET I WANTED DASH TO JUST STAB IT AND HAVE HER AND AJ HAVE A FILLY OF THEIR OWN SOMEHOW GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!1!!!1!1!ONE!!1!
I'm glad there's going to be alternate endings for this, because I have SO MANY things wrong with this chapter that it's almost scary! I was enjoying the decent story leading up to this, but I really think you dropped the ball. :(
It was a fun ride, however. <3 You do well with emotional writing.
35246 Might I ask you to elaborate? More so that, are you disppointed in the ending in general, or were there some more errors that were overlooked?
35339
I'm disappointed with basically everything in the chapter. The previous chapter reached a point we knew the story was going to reach. Admittedly, I wasn't expecting a love triangle several chapters ago, but eventually the growing love triangle started to become obvious and it became part of the ultimate emotional clash. Last chapter was the whole thing coming crashing down on both RD and AJ. This chapter was set up to be the recovery from everything that happened. Dash needed to set the record straight and salvage the relationship, perhaps making it stronger than ever in the process, then the two and their friends can finish the resurrection of Sweet Apple Acres and bring the story to a lovely end.
That's not what happened though, is it? Instead, Applejack left town, leaving her friends and family behind, abandoning the work effort in the process. Without her, her family left to Appleoosa like originally threatened, which broke up the CMC forever and sent Granny to Manehattan. The Acres still managed to come back somehow, but without ANY of the original ponies. Dash tried to find AJ but ultimately starts a bad idea relationship with Twilight, which of course failed, and she then breaks ties with Ponyville and laves. Hence, the Mane Six are fractured for years, before Dash decides to abandon the Wonderbolts tryouts just to make her return for the funeral of Granny. Then we find out AJ had a child with some nobody nameless stallion that happened to remind her of Dash, and she still loves Dash despite all that happened, and despite abandoning her entire previous life precisely because of Dash and what she did. Now they're back together somehow and we have our happy ending.
I don't want to come off like I'm sounding mean, I truly don't, I'm just trying to be critical. If I am allowed to be brutally honest, I will say that all of that a big clusterfuck of nonsense. It's _certainly_ different, if that's what you were going for, and I've never read a fic that ended in such a way. But was absolutely unnecessary and provided a brutal mess of an ending to a story that was otherwise doing well, and building up to what could have been a very dramatic and tearjerking climax that showed us how love and friendship can conquer even the worst of situations and biggest heartbreaks. Instead, you derailed the entire story and fractured the cast for a few in-story years, before magically patching everything up loooong after the fact, in entirely unconvincing fashion.
So... Yeah. :( I'm sorry, but that's how I felt. I hope you understand, and I hope you can do something better with at least one of your alternate endings.
35995 Well, I accept your criticsms regardless of how I feel on how I wrapped things up. Frankly I don't think things could have been fixed between the two without some time apart. Maybe it came off as mess to you, but again I've heard the stories of people loving someone long after a break up or soemthing awful has happened, and just using someone else as a comfort, basically. To a point I'll defend my work in saying that it really did go with a friendship/love conquers all idea in that Applejack was still willing to work things out after having so much time to go over things, and after Dash having time to realize how stupid she'd been.
I really don't think the alternate ending ideas I have will convicne you any differently on how this fic could have ended, because I can honestly say none of them wrap up quite how you thought the fic was going to end. But as it being your opinion and all, I do thank you for replying back and giving me a good answer to why you thought that way.
35995 I also wanted to add though, I too don't mean to sound mean in my reply. I'm fine with all criticism, so while I can't say it the negative stuff doesn't get to me a little, I am glad you replied back and such, and gave me a well thought answer. I will say though, as an add on to what I was saying,based on things I've seen in real life relationships, I also find it hard to think things could have gotten worked out in the span of the last chapter in the same time period, and even if I had, I think there was the possibility for a lot of loose ends. Still, maybe one of the alternate endings you will like better, when I finish them up.
36038
Well obviously they needed some time apart, but I wouldn't have made it two years and fractured the entire foundation of the group, is what I'm saying. Obviously that wasn't my only problem, but you get the point. Friendship/love did indeed conquer all in the end, but I felt it wasn't handled as well as it could have been, huge time skip or not. Thanks for understanding the criticism, at least. :)
i think im gonna cry blood
because my heart just exploded three times in 2 minutes flat
. first i was like
but then i was like
LOVED EVERY BIT
Holy Son of a Bitch fantastic turn around loved every minute of it.
Unlike dastrdlyW I've shed a few tears, it was so beautiful and sad!
I love it! please do more things like this!
I had to train myself to ignore the metric ton of typos while reading, but it was worth it. Absolutely fantastic story.
And I'm not ashamed at all to admit that I'd be crying right now if my eyes weren't currently so screwed up from allergies.
41347 Like I've said I got my prereader Zev about halfway through, so I really have to go fix them. I've just been very busy with various things, but they'll get fixed soon.
Hmm I rate this cereal to the power of 5 times X sooooooo it's rated
C•C•C•C•C•X if c = 84 and x= 109 (Royal canterlot voice) DO THE MATH!!!!
Tell meh dah awnser if ya know it.
Why the buck do I read sadfics, even the ones with happy endings? They make me so, so very sad. I'm not the happiest person anyway...
This was good, I thought the filly was done well: AJ's infatuation with RD lasted a loong while. This been said, however, I expected it to end after RD left town. To just, kinda fade out with the others of the mane 6 moving on, but RD and AJ still loving each other, yet unable to meet due to mutual fear.
Overall, a very good fic.
4.5 & fave
44134
Buh...?
44134
45780, or in case you were going fir something else, it's over nine-thousand.
:D YAY! Amazing ending!
I just spend the last 2 1/2 hours reading the original story(havent read the redux) and i feel like i need to express my feelings:
This story, while having minor grammatical hicccups, was extremly well written.
The Story told left me with moments i wanted to throw my ebook reader at the wall for making me tear up.
I had moments icouldn'thelp but smile broadly as the emotional scenes between rd and aj.
i feared that the story would have a sad ending and almost considered to stop reading it.
I feel that this story tucked at my heartstrings more than anyother Appledash story i've read(and iread alot over the past few month).
For delivering such a good Story, I really want to thank the author.
34770
I think you should write about the year dash spent looking for AJ.
It would be interesting
I reckon dash was forgiven a little too easily, and not just by applejack. But this was a well written story, well paced and generally good. Id say a 7.5/10 seeing as tere were still lots of minor errors in the writing and some things that i just dont think the "element of loyalty" could be capable of doing or even thinking.
Im glad i read this though. A nice change from what i usually read, not that there was twidash, the only ship i follow is appledash, but good story overall!