Rainbow Dash versus The Marewich

Rainbow Dash is a hungry, hard working mare, and after a long day, she needs a real meal.
Surely you don't doubt her prowess as a cook, do you?
I see the skepticism in your eyes. Very well then. Watch and be in awe of her culinary talents as Rainbow Dash cooks a Marewich. She'll prove you all wrong.

---
(this is actually an older fic of mine, previously only on Devart and written for a little 2000 word writing challenge. See? Not everything I write is tens of thousands of words.)

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Comments ( 18 )

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metallusionsismagic

metallusionsismagic #1 · Aug 23rd, 2013 · 3 · ·

: "This story's so short I have to kneel to read it!"
Did you like my Ramsay impression? Also, what the heck would a mouth glove look like?

zany hijacks

Hijinks?

Pashoo

Pashoo #2 · Aug 23rd, 2013 · 1 · ·

Aaaah I didn't even know you could do that to a sandwich! I was reading and the whole time, I was thinking, "Yes, Rainbow Dash, you're right, but that's not how cooking works!"

CKRush

CKRush #3 · Aug 23rd, 2013 · · ·

But I like things that are tens of thousands of words!

When I first read the title it made me think of the Broodwich from ATHF. I don't know how that would have worked in Equestria, but it could have been fun.

All in all it wasn't bad. I'm also hungry now, which is strange considering how awful that marewich sounds.

mr. tallyman18

mr. tallyman18 #4 · Aug 24th, 2013 · · ·

I bow to a culinary skill far exceeding my own, well done rainbowdash. and good work on this fic, these fun little slice of life/comedy one-shots are always a treat to read

Psykosis

Psykosis #5 · Aug 24th, 2013 · · ·

I've had enough burnt meals to know never to leave food unattended. I'm actually reminded of a funny story: My brother put a slice of pizza in the microwave to reheat it, but accidentally input 30 minutes instead of 30 seconds. He then walked away to watch cartoons and promptly forgot about it. Cue one very overdone pizza later, and he still somehow hasn't learned to keep an eye on his food.

The Letter J

The Letter J #6 · Aug 24th, 2013 · 1 · ·

A story I can read in less than a week? YAY!

...I'll get through TPC eventually.

rosebug

rosebug #7 · Aug 24th, 2013 · 1 · ·

Rainbow Dash's cooking skills make me feel so much better about my own (although the scorch marks in my kitchen beg to differ).

SIGAWESOME

SIGAWESOME #8 · Aug 24th, 2013 · · ·

Wow. Here is a blast from the past.
Now I can finally favourite it and save it to my epub ebook library.

On the other hoof, she had plenty of corn and rice. She shrugged. One grain was basically the same as any other in the long run.
Mixing up a pound of oats, dry corn and rice, Dash 'hmm'ed and added another half pound. Just to be sure. She was pretty hungry, after all, and a pound didn't seem like that much. In fact, roughly measuring it out, the little pile of grains didn't seem nearly enough to satisfy the hunger of a real pegasus mare!

I winced hard when I read this. Grains can be sneaky, catching naive wannabe chefs by surprise with tendency to dramatically balloon in volume as they are cooked...

hypervelocity

hypervelocity #9 · Aug 25th, 2013 · · ·

Oh Lord. I know so many people who do this that it's almost ironic.

Definitely can see RD doing this, though. Short and funny!

Minalkra

Minalkra #10 · Aug 29th, 2013 · 3 · ·

Hmmm. Yup, that's Rainbow alright.

As a character piece, I can actually see this Rainbow-ideal. She is REALLY close to how she's portrayed in the show. The fact we're a semi-omniscient reader with a focus on her mind-set and thoughts really helps. Some people might have gone 'first person' on this - that would suit as well I suppose - but semi-omniscient 3rd works and helps to keep things from getting too introspective. I like the way that things are described but left juuuust vague enough not to bog this down with needless exposition or description.

As a comedy, it falls into that comfortable 'chuckle' area. It's not a knee-slapper and the jokes are more a slow and even keel. RD's egotism is played straight and for laughs rather than hiding some 'dark and mysterious past' or angst or the like. Really, that's the joke - it's a chuckle but not hilarious. Still, it works so 'ts all good, dawg.

It really doesn't bring anything new anywhere special but it is very well written and entirely believable. I enjoyed it and I would suggest making a few more - turn this into 'Ponies Can't Cook' or something similar if you wanted to do some character practice. Highlight some aspect of regular life the heroines can't do all that well. Fluttershy answering a phone, Twilight ordering online, Rarity cleaning the bathroom. Things that point out their flaws in a way that isn't overwrought. Not that you need help with the characters, Cpn, cause seriously ... but it might make a nice distraction from your main effort if you need it.

TL;DR: Capn_Chryssalid knows how to write. Yay!

Themaskedferret