• Member Since 16th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen February 24th

That Drunk Pony


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Rainbow Dash and Spike are arguing over a debate on who is the better flier in the wonderbolts between Blaze and Lightning Streak. It was a useless debate, but the flares between the two only made the necklace for loyalty spark more and more. Eventually it shot a beam through the safe, past the palace walls, and headed straight to Ponyville. The beam ensnared both Rainbow Dash and Spike just at the peak of the debate. Now Rainbow is Spike and Spike is Rainbow Dash.

Chapters (3)
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Comments ( 20 )

Sweet a :moustache: :heart: :rainbowderp: tale.
By the way FIRST.

3089654 Damn, beat me to it.

I think this is the first time I saw a body swap that involves Spike. As long as you don't go overboard with the clichés this could be really interesting.

3090824>>3089844>>3089802>>3089709
You guys think I should change the title. I literally made it 5 mins before going off to work. I didn't know what to name it so I just through something. Like I am now thinking "Elemental Dysfunction" or at least something more like a title. I feel bad for rushing the title and such. I probably should get an image as well or just make one.

Also for cliche's i think the worst I could do is Rainbow Dash loving herself because she is Rainbow Dash.

3093137
well you got me there. i'll do it after the final chapter

Mmm, thanks for adding this to the correct folder so I could find it!

I apologize for not commenting on this sooner, but I've just spent the weekend at BUCK. :moustache:

3105751
Sorry. Truth be told, I didn't even know where to submit it. Someone else put it into the SpikeDash group. Hope you had fun at BUCK. I still need to tweak this story before finishing it off. I better hurry before the time limit is up.

There are two things I strongly recommend to improve this fic to satisfactory standards.

Firstly, change the introduction to past tense. The whole fic should be in past tense. There should be no 'are's or 'will be's. This rule is one of the most basic rules you should try to follow.

Rainbow Dash and Spike are arguing over a debate on who is the better flier in the wonderbolts between Blaze and Lightning Streak in the evening. The two wonderbolts were known to be rivals, but in reality they have been equal on practically every stat in one way or another. It was a useless debate, but the flares between the two only made the necklace spark more and more. Eventually it shot a beam through the safe, past the palace walls, and headed straight to Ponyville. The beam ensnared both Rainbow Dash and Spike just at the peak of the debate.

Secondly, you should take your time and spend a lot more time explaining things. For example, the first few paragraphs are literally cramming words down the readers throats, telling them what happened when you should be showing them what's happening.

This is just a little pre-deadline criticism. I'll go into a lot more detailed upon the conclusion of the competition.

When this story gonna be updated.

4149367

This! ^

Gief moar story! :flutterrage:

it's alive

This is really good so far. Take a fav, like and a derp! :derpytongue2:

this is a awesame story:pinkiehappy:keep up the work.

Fantastic story so far, I really enjoy the portrayal of the characters in this. I can't wait to see what happens next!

So much for this being a one shot also more please thank you:twilightblush:

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