WebHead69
Joined 2nd Jan, 2013 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- KazTheTravler · 4.8k words · 52 20 · 2.8k views
- JonRS · 31k words · 113 41 · 1.8k views
- Hardcover · 161k words · 41 42 · 1.4k views
- Arceaion · 14k words · 57 10 · 2.3k views
- sbloom85 · 3k words · 73 7 · 8.6k views
- LostUmbrella · 16k words · 54 0 · 1.1k views
- Jubei Yagyu · 18k words · 77 12 · 1.9k views
- Equinox Starshifter · 226k words · 52 9 · 896 views
Featured In10
- Crossbreed My Heart872 stories ·977 members
Anthropomorphics7,624 stories ·5,014 members
- Co-Author and Editor2,620 stories ·156 members
Rage Reviews!1,082 stories ·1,628 members
Boobies and even more Boobies6,465 stories ·3,100 members
- Changeling Cuddlers392 stories ·356 members
Stories on Goodreads28,596 stories ·492 members
The Temple of Ogaudno578 stories ·100 members
Stats
Page generated in 0.209 seconds
Total duration
791 users online
968,756 hits today, 1,822,946 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Obvious Self Insert Gary Stu Green and Black Cardboard Cutout Alicorn OC Who Falls In Love With a Mane 6 Character and Fucks Her Without Any Time For Character Development is Obvious
Every author that can make a good clopfic the past few times must eventually make a bad one. This is the bad one...
5065570 If that's what you're expecting, then you're REALLY going to be disappointed... of course, people here may assume that it's going to go in that direction because you wrote it here.
5065642 Or they'll assume that because you're not doing anything significantly different from anyone else who's tried cramming their OC into canon ponies' sex lives.
5065677 Ah prejudice fandom~
Well hopefully my regular readers won't forget that I am not lazy when it comes to my stories~
Anyways, please see through to the end. If you still think it was predictable, then I won't hold it to you~
5065677 What this boyo said.
5065704
Not what six consecutive counts of titles with improper capitalization and seven with unnecessary punctuation are telling me.
5065713 Touché on how I write~
5065725
i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/010/692/19789999.jpg
Also ending all your story titles with a ~
3.bp.blogspot.com/-H8YtWpaMupY/Ujnh0PsqbUI/AAAAAAAALPA/BdPxjsUlwLY/s1600/snowflake.gif
5065813 I acknowledged his criticism; I am pretty sure acknowledging a 'hit' is appropriate with that term? Or did you want me to get upset...?
Yay! Snowflakes!!!~~~~~~~ ✨✨✨❄❄❄❄
5065858 I like it so far.
5066110
Careful, I might do something to displease you as well as the story goes on.
5066165 Dun Dun DUNNNNNNNNN!
I can't blame the people who disliked this. The alicorn(changling) thing is getting ridiculous. Too many of them.
Plus the oc sex scenes in stories are boring ad shit.
Oh those dislikes...
5068747 And you're immediately assuming that OC sex is involved based on what...? Frankly, I didn't realize that changeling/alicorn is mainstream, but that won't affect anything with what I already have planned~
5069522 Maybe I can break the record!
5070183 I'm not assuming that it will be alicorn oc sex, but there are many things wrong with the way you wrote those sentences, which is why you need to find an editor. Unless you have one. I have two of them working on separate stories. Most reasons people dislike stories is because of how the grammar is so badly done. My first 4 stories suffered because of this, but i learned my lesson from it.
And yes, Alicorn oc's are widely used without thinking of a good backstory, they just go with whatever they can think of. I've seen some make villains that are evil, for the sake of being evil. A bad combination. But since yours is a changling, it makes no sense for him to be an alicorn in the first place. It throws the story way off balance.
5070711 While an editor is always helpful, I rather learn the hard way; I rather get harsh criticism from strangers who are less likely to 'sugar-coat' things for me. It's stubborn of me to do things this way, but I've improved because of this. Yeah it's a stupid excuse, but it has helped me.
Also, I misread what you wrote in particular with you mentioning OC sex; I thought you wrote OOC so sorry.
Also, I would have better understood your concern for him turning into an Alicorn making no sense...if he actually turned into one within the first chapter without any explanation. But he hasn't. I am pretty sure that one would guess that he comes across an Alicorn at one point during the story, but I am not one to spoil.
However I do hope that you will at least allow the story to complete first before pointing out plot holes (or just things that don't make sense), because people are going to assume that if the negative assumptions are influencing this story and pressuring me; one already assumed that there's not going to be good character development, and I am actually a whore to character development.
So I can understand if my writing isn't flawless with grammar issues around, but please give the story a chance to explain things after a short first chapter when regarding the structure of the characters and plot~
5070968 Buddy, I feel sorry for you.
well I would be saying that; if it wasn't for the lack of consistency in the story. his parents are the two baddies in the show but yet, the timeframe of these two characters don't add up.
5111767 In time it'll make sense; I do plan to explain on their meeting.
I say, is this a possible "Coming to America" reference I see??
BEcause that looks just like the scene where Prince Akeem spoke to his arranged bride in private, just without the 'bark like a dog' part...
And I kinda pity those that do not see the reference, since anyone that know a little about Eddie Murphy will know what I'm talking about.
THERE'S ANOTHER ONE!!!!!!
I cannot believe it!!! This really looks a bit like Coming to America!!!
I'm definitely looking very forward to this!!! And I know that there will be some differences but seriously wow!!!!
5184962
Hey you figured it out!
I just got the idea and added in some references but there are going to be obvious differences compared from this to the movie.
I really love this story, don't worry about the updates though! Hope you get things sorted before the holidays
5330439
Speaking of references, I believe that this is another reference as well:
If I remember correctly, the lovely zebra/griffon couple are the same couple that are the main characters in Zig Zag Love by Akatashi Brony (I apologize if the spelling is misspelled, it's not on purpose). I know that because he's also the author of Lunacy of Love, a Spike/Luna/Rarity romantic comedy with a bit of war in the background, that I'm reading currently, and I will take a look at Zig Zag Love when I get the chance.
I am looking forward to more as the story goes!! It's fun to find the references, but I think I be quiet with it from now on---I'm pretty sure that others will see them, and more than likely will see some that I haven't heard before, and I'm willing to let others find them for themselves.
5334233
Actually, the different species couple and the reference of their 'language' is what I am using to hint that they're French since France is a country that is known for culture diversity. Hence I thought it be nice to show a couple in this universe that aren't from the same species.
Don't know anything about another writers' work lol.
more please
Excuse me, sir, but I do believe I was using that pic in my changeling fic. Please kindly change it before somepony confuses mine with yours.
You know, I don't see why people dislike this story so much. I personally have nothing against it. I simply see another unique clopfic with an interesting plot. Seriously, this story should be liked WAY more than disliked.
People perhaps dislike it because of the grammar being used. I dunno, but I assure you, that this story is actually really interesting. I don't think I've ever read a Changeling OC x Fluttershy clopfic shipping.
5861745
Actually it's kinda stupid; I used a image of a black alicorn as the story's cover at the time but a lot of people got upset because of the apparent 'overdone changeling-alicorn gimmick' that I wasn't aware of (being 100% honest here). Thus, they immediately judged the story by its cover when I simply wanted to use a reasonable image to represent the main character in his disguise. Heck if you look at these earlier comments (should they still be there), you would notice that they already made a whole bunch of assumptions pre-maturely when you look at the date of the comments and the actual chapter(s) released.
I didn't really care much about it since I decided just to change it to the current but there are going to be biased new readers that come across my story because of the already high dislike bar. I am sure you noticed that this isn't any different than how write compared to my other stories. And I do agree that my grammar has issues but that hasn't stopped them from enjoying my other stories.
5861823 Hey, everyone has to start somewhere. Sure, you can learn from what you did, and improve, but sometimes, people are too hard-headed to see the effort you are using to change your intentions.
Then, that isn't your fault. Screw the ratings, and the biased people. I literally have a hate to those people who just love to torment other authors with low ratings. I started out like that. From experience, do not let the downvoters affect you. If you do, you will focus ONLY on the negative, and not the positive.
5862033 Oh but of course! Thank you for the support! :)
hmm interesting story
Anypony who hits the thumbs-down button has absolutely no taste!
This is a wonderful tale! Keep up the great work~ I look forward to reading.
*grabs some popcorn* this is going to be good
...Quagmire.
5889203 I was worried that no one would get it. XD
41 likes to 51 dislikes… just keep up the good work, and you'll finally have good ratings. Patience, and hard work is the key here.
5890256 I just saw that last night
I Gotta say, this ant half bad.
The writing is kinda clunky, and the pacing is fairly poor, but the story is good and the premise is interesting.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
CONTINUE THE DAMN STORY
WebHead69 where is the next chapter for this story
6301536 I accidentally published it; give me a few minutes to finish the editing.
6301564 okay
Run.
Oh merciful heavens....
they've been found out. Both of them.
I wonder what gave them away. Or is it that both Princess Celestia, and by extension, Twilight, both know how to sense different auras other than pony. And that when they (specifically Twilight) see the two of them in their disguise, she can see point blank that they are changlings. And I'm pretty sure that Celestia knows that Adalaricus is a prince in the Changeling Kingdom.
Just please don't eradicate them because Adalicus and Raul are changelings...Adalicus is in genuine love with Fluttershy, same with Raul/Pinkie Pie (though it seems more lust than love). And just because his mother is a scoundrel doesn't have to condemn him simply because of his roots If anything, they should be allowed to stay in Ponyville; they really have taken a liking to the town, and neither of them are harming anyone.
Give them a chance Celestia and Twilight. Please.
Also, I know Pinkie was serious about keeping their secret identities in confidence, but if it is a Royal Order, particularly if it's one from Celestia, Pinkie has to fess up.
Oh, I just remembered---there are a bunch of Coming to America references throughout the story. Hell, Adalicus and Raul are Prince Akeem (Eddie Murphy) and his friend Semi (Arsenio Hall) from the movie.
BTW, if you don't get it, I highly suggest you to rent it out, or probably download it and watch it. And for those of you that have on-demand services to your homes, get on your preferred viewing device and just search for 'Coming To America' It is a comedy classic, so it should be relatively simple to get it.
Anyway, this cliffhanger of a scene is just like the climax in the movie--discovering that Akeem isn't a foreign exchange student, but a prince from a different land. Again, I don't know how Celestia knew Adalicus's true identity, but she knew (I think she learned from Twilight--I know that's from a different chapter where the closing statements were that she was writing Celestia a letter)
The rating bar is unfair; it's sitting at 55/55 at the moment, but the red portion is slightly larger.