When they got to the front door Raindrops swished her teal mane out of her eyes, and looked at Scoots, “Hey, listen Scootaloo. If anyone asks why you’re here I’m going to tell those you don’t want to know that I’m babysitting you while your parents are away. And just so you know I’m watching Dinky Doo while Ditzy is getting over Alicorn Pox.”
Scootaloo gave a short nod, and after they entered Raindrops house, she was given a tour of the place. The first place she was shown was the kitchen it had an old auto-light oven that used a replaceable lightning cloud to cook the food. The floors were oak, and it had a cherry wood table. All around the walls other than the table was a green marble, wrap around countertop with a dark vanished drawers and shelving. A window near the left corner across from the oven let in a soft trickling of light.
The bathrooms were all similar. Granite countertops, a large basin sink with a set of stairs with a holding rail near them. tractioned flooring. Weird toilets that had guard rails near the sides. When Scootaloo asked about them, Raindrops answered that some ponies had trouble moving about so the rails were so that ponies could move about the restrooms without injuring themselves. The bath tub is what really caught Scootaloo’s eye though. It was two pony lengths wide, and a half a normal pony lengths deep. It was the biggest tub that Scootaloo had ever seen.
Next were other various rooms that Scootaloo didn’t think to pay much attention to. Including the place she was going to be sleeping, Sparkler and Dinky Doo’s rooms, Her room, and the game room. The later filled with books, board games, pool, table hockey, and a projector with a small collection of film reels. Raindrops walked her to the bathroom that was for now Scootaloo’s and told her that after her bath to meet her in the Game Room, and not to worry about other ponies showing up. She rarely got visitors this time of year, and the girls wouldn’t be showing up for the next three hours.
Scootaloo enjoyed taking a nice long bath, it was nice when she was at her friend place’s. To be safe and not having to worry about prying eyes catching her while she washed off in a creek, the park lake, or took a quick sink bath in Bargain Bin’s restroom. Although ever since meeting Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon she didn’t use that place as much as she used too. But in houses, she could take her time, letting the water soak into her coat. Slowly enjoying the feeling of soap being massaged into her sore body. It turns out sleeping on the hard ground after rigorously working everyday out isn’t the best for the body. So when she had the time to enjoy this simple luxury she enjoyed abusing it.
As the tub filled with water and a several inch thick crust of bubbles, Scootaloo walked onto of the bubbles as normal pegasi would a cloud. Being the only thing close to a cloud that Scootaloo could get to it gave her a large amount of entertainment before she got to the good parts. After jumping up and down on the bubbles skidding around the tub like a skater would skate on ice. Doing a few axles and pirouettes for good measures she gathered the bubbles before her and made herself a cave of bubbles. Sitting on her haunches she pulled up a mass of bubbles to her ear like a walkie talkie, "Daring Doo, this is Scootaloo reporting from the Lost Caves of the Pygmy Ponies. I'm heading in!"
With that she dived into the "cave" and let her body glide around the water under the bubbles. Letting the water soak into her fur as she drifted around. After several seconds of swimming she popped up and arranged the bubbles around to form a flowing bubble mane, and a giant beard, and making several pony bubble statues, said, "By Celestia's beard! Pygmy Ponies are here to protect their treasure! Time to bring out the big guns! Scootaloo, transform into Princess Scootaloo, Ruler of all things Awesometastic!"
Setting her wings a buzzing the bubbles were scattered throughout bathroom. Most staying inside the tub, but the beard, mane, and pygmy ponies were unfortunately blown away by her spectacular display of power. Settling in the tub now that she had stretched out her sore muscles, soaked, and had her fun. It was time to fully enjoy this rare occasion. Taking the junior hoof pick from its place on the side of the tub she silently thanked Raindrops earlier washing. It reduced a lot of the gunk she built up over a day, and made this part less dirty than she was used to.
Taking the pick at the back of her hoof giggled as it it gave a pleasurable tickle as it lifted mud, garbage, rocks, tree sap, and other debris from her hoof. Slowly but surely she had a majority of the stuff removed, and with a thick bristled brush removed the rest. Spitting it out she moved to using her fore hooves to use the pick and brush to clean the back hooves. Next part was her favorite part of all. The sponging.
In between Crusading, riding around on her scooter, and standing on her back hooves, sleeping on hard surfaces ninety percent of her nights left her body a mass of knots, sore muscles, and various aches. But soaking in a nice warm tub, her muscles soaking in the heat, massaging said muscles was just what the doctor ordered. As her hooves slowly worked their way around the parts of her body she could reach, massaging out each problem area at a time.
Oooohhhhh! This feels so good! I didn’t think I’d get another good bath until I went to Sweetie Belle’s next week. Well this Raindrops mare looks pretty legit, and she did Pinkie Promise. But I was hoping that nopony would find me out, I mean I knew it was bound to happen someday, but I was still wishing that nothing would have to change since I wandered into this town. What if she decides that she wants to send me away, or that I’m not worth the trouble and just kicks me out? Can I really trust her or is she just trying to trick me? I mean she seems like a nice mare, but I guess I’ll have to wait for the other horseshoe to drop. Until then I’m going to be enjoying me a bath.
Raindrops went around the kitchen getting various foods and treats together so that Scootaloo had something to munch on while they talked. Tomorrow is going to be one hectic day. I need to find my Level Two Foster Care, Respite Forms. My Emergency Shelter certifications, Hospice Training records... what else do I need to do to cut through the red tape here and get things underway. I don't want Scootaloo to think that I'm trying to step in as a parent yet, or maybe even at all. But at least if Canterlot sends somepony by the FPS, I'll be able to keep her here. Thank you, Cloudkicker, for telling me to transfer my forms over to Ponyville just in case an emergency popped up. I'll need to get you some flowers or something nice. Always looking out for me since we met in Canterlot. Best friend a mare could ask for.
So after I get those go over to Twilight's while everypony is put to bed. Lock the door, and get thing situated. See if there isn't a more long term foster setup, or any pony looking to adopt over here in Ponyville. It'd be horrible to take her away from what little of a life she's managed to build here. Rainbow Dash thinks the world of that little filly, says she's the best little sister ever. But I'll wait to Scootaloo is ready to open up more and is ready to talk to her, herself.
So the time flew with her inside her head planning on what to do and say. Making sure that everything was picture perfect.And putting together a game plan for ensuring that the all of the youths under her care were happy. But she'd get a slightly more complete story than she had from Scootaloo whenever she got finished from her bath. Which by the sounds above her was coming up soon.
When she had finished up, half an hour later, and got to the Game Room she saw Raindrop sitting on a chair facing the door with a large assortment of food and a cup of soda waiting for Scootaloo. Waving her over with a forehoof Raindrops said, “Come on over, and sit next to me. We need to talk a little bit so that I can help you more, but don’t worry if there is anything that you are too uncomfortable talking about, let me know and we can skip it for now.”
After giving an affirmative grunt, and digging into her food with reckless abandon. As Raindrop started the conversation, “ So what about where you’ve been sleeping, how have you taken care of yourself so long?” Raindrops asked leaning in slightly, letting Scootaloo know that she had her full attention.
“Well I’ve been living in the back alleys, sometimes if the weather is bad enough I live in the Cutie Mark Crusader club house on Sweet Apple Acres. Although now that the Cutie Mark Crusaders are formed, I sleep over at their places every now and then when they aren’t too busy. Well if you’ve been in my hooves, you probably know how I’ve been eating, although I try to pay off AJ back from the Apples I take from them by leaving a few bits I find laying around. Well the bits that don’t go to getting school stuff, or fixing my scooter.” She said off hoof. Giving as little details as possible, including the definition of finding bits laying around.
Raindrops looked at Scootaloo, wrapped her wing around her in a hug. She knew exactly what ‘laying around’ meant, and while Ponyville was different than Canterlot she knew enough about outdoor survival that she could piece together the things of that question that went unanswered. Scootaloo was caught off guard by the hug and pushed herself into it as the warmth wrapped around her in a comforting cocoon. Raindrops dropped her muzzle to the top of Scootaloo’s head and whispered, “You don’t have to live that life any more. Until we figure out what to do, you will always have a place here if you’d like.”
So thus their conversation continued until Dinky Doo and Sparkler came over and shifted into the misadventures of the Cutie Mark Crusaders as well as an invitation to Dinky Doo to join when they had their crusader meeting tomorrow. It was many hours later when Scootaloo went off to bed, and with her asleep, Raindrops though of what she was going to do tomorrow.
well written , i cant find any problems with this, cant wait for whats to come !
3045585
Thank you.
Wow, now this is going to be a great story. I haven't read all that much about Raindops, so this will be interesting for me.
A bit quick, but otherwise ok.
I'll give a follow, just for the heck of it.
~Skeeter The Lurker
3045958
I hope so. I got a lot of good things planned with Raindrop's character, as well as a few other lesser seen background ponies. Thank you for your comment.
3045949
Thank you for your comment, and while I personally see it as her holding Raindrop to her Pinkie Promise, I'll try to keep the pacing at a less quick point, but a more slower pace to allow things to develop naturally. Although if you think the later chapters are going to fast. Let me know, and I'll be sure to tone the speed down a bit to a more appropriate speed
3046027
... Fixed .
Sorry
I look forward to where this is going. Have a like, favourite and follow
3046094
Thank you and no problem . I'd rather an error be pointed out so I can fix it, rather than leave it hanging. So thank you for pointing those out. .
3046108
As long as you keep writing this, I think we'll call it even
not bad if a bit short, looking forward to chapter 3.
Wow this is good chapters are short but really good hope it gets updated soon !!
3047373
Thank you. That Homonym almost always gets me. On a side note. I really must thank you for inspiring me to write this fic. I owe you one .
3047616
I'm posted a thread in OEE to get an editor to fix them up. I'll admit that I'm working on improving my grammar, but it is still something that I need work on. So hopefully I get an editor soon. When I do I'll edit what I've already done. And if you'd like I'll give you PM.
As for ScootAdoption. I know it's not original in and of itself. But I'd thought I'd give it an original spin. That plus I'm a sucker for ScootAdoption so I'd thought I'd give it a go, with a pony who gets so very little love in fics.
I know. I was thinking of working on that angle as less trusting [and more trusting in the power of a Pinkie Promise which is a very sacred oath. Especially to a filly/colt], as is caught between wanting a warm place to sleep, and wary of what would happen if she tried to run. But it's something that has been brought up and something that I am going to work on polishing in later chapters.
But thank you for posting your opinion, and those will be somethings that I'll be working on polishing up in future chapters.
So this indeed needs an editor pretty badly, but not quite as badly as one might think. It's still quite legible, but defintely needs some polish... and only one skipped line between paragraphs, dear. Just one. I'm glad you're looking into getting a proofer.
That aside, the events taking place in the story are warm cuddly and absolutely have my support. Seeing Scoots dumpster-diving was a little out there for me but the "adoption part and everything afterward were joys to imagine as I read.
Keep at it, and don't be afraid to polish!
3048337
Overly Extensive Editors, Story Thread Link. Yep I'm looking for an editor so that I can really give this a nice shine.
Although I'm going to have two revisions in chapters 1 and 2. One to fill them out a bit to explain some things that have been asked. And if I don't have an editor by next week. One additional revision on chapters 3&4. [A revised / fixed chapter, and one that has been gone through by the amazing people over at OEE.]
Thank you for your comment, and I hope you'll stop by later to see the final edited chapters. Also, One space between paragraphs? Wouldn't that make paragraphs run together to much?
3048381
Great to hear! Good luck.
And hey, try it, see how it comes out! Also check out other stories and I'm sure you'll see that placing a space one line wide between paragraphs is pretty much the norm. But the two to three between each you have here? Can mess with readers's heads.
3048415
Ah! That'll be so much easier than going through a story and making 4 spaces between paragraphs. Again thank you for pointing that out to me.
3048432
You're quite welcome!
(Also please excuse the typos that keep cropping up in my posts. Tablet typing... )
3048467
Fixed spacing, and indented paragraphs.
Also you are forgiven. I know how horrible tablets can be. Darn Autocorrect. But that's why I my lovely laptop.
3048484
Thanks. Actually I got that alot, and it's something that tomorrow when I have free time [around 4 pm est] I'm going to fix up by adding internal dialog, and mental conflict into scoots to show her thought process.
But I promise you, and anyone reading this comment that by Friday, 12 PM EST. Both chapters will be filled out more and hopefully will make things more believable / a more solid foundation. Then all I need is an editor to give it a final polish.
3048476
Tablets are great for whipping out when you have a busy schedule and really need to fight for writing time, like me. I do miss my laptop so, though. Definitely getting a new one before the year is out.
And wow this story's like ten times more readable now. Excellent job!
3049466
Sorry was thinking of a Fic that I read that had a different number. I'll fix that after I get out of my meeting.
3051623 Ah, I see I guess that makes sense and I'll be sure to mention any nitpicks I have then. Also I'll make sure to check back around that time.
Wow! That revision is amazing and you were right I did love it I can't wait to read more and FPS was clever
3052097
. Thank you. The next chapter is being set up right now and I'll have it up by this Saturday. It is going to be rather informative and sweet . If I can I'll also try doing another double chapter week next week .
Oh God, this chapter was so cute. Scootaloo playing in the bath was ADORABLE! Faving this ahead of time instead of adding it to my bloated read later was a good move.
No question, Scootaloo playing in the bath was cute.
That said, I'm holding back on some criticism. Once I've finished the whole story, would you like I fired off a review like I did for your other one?
Okay I must be the only one who doesn't know what she means by bits lying around. You mean Scootaloo is stealing money here and there?
5735814
Yes. Technically she didn't understand / see it as stealing until A little later. But yes. She stole bits left as tips, left on her friends families tables / places to keep bits if they needed a little more later on, or simply bits that she found laying around in other ponies properties (Most of the time).
But she really didn't intend it to be stealing, she just needed bits, and they were there. Nonetheless, stealing it was.