[ Feel Good Dark Comedy ]
When Rainbow Dash leaves her, Pinkie Pie decides it's time to off herself! But when her own methods fail, it's up to her friends to help her. And thus, begins an exciting adventure of assisted suicide and the horrible hijinks which ensue!
Raccoon, you are not funny and should feel bad.
This is a crack-fic I wrote back before Season 2 aired. At the time, the Equestria Daily mods refused to even read it, saying it was sick, unfunny, and completely inappropriate. As a result, it's a bit out of date, but you know what? I still think it's hilarious, even years later, so I'm posting it with only minor revision.
Chapters (5)
Yep, this is what it's like.
This just happened to be at the top of the new list the moment I logged in. Hellooo!
8439081
Ohai. :V
8439087
Pinkie Pie is best suicider.
A masterpiece! :D
8439091
Hey, didn't you read this back in like, 2012 when I first wrote it?
8439040
This is like an episode of the show, straight outta Season 1. :V
8439091
This is the doc I'm posting from if you want to read ahead and comment. https://docs.google.com/document/d/16H45ANxACvriugAoSwYjeEUyN1X0ZAt4SGX8PfleFkY/edit?usp=sharing
I'm doing other things between chapter postings.
Perfect! That's really all I can think to say right now due to me writing my own fics. Great story though! I love it!
8439148
It's not great. It's bullshit.
Why are you even reading this?
This is bad. Shoo... Shoo.
Go read Into Nothing, that one is good.
WHY DID I READ THIS?!?!?!?!?!
8439261
I dunno, maybe you want to die too!
8439262
dude, that's actually unfunny. joking about it with a made up cartoon character is crossing the line twice; saying it to someone who you don't know just crosses the line.
8439262
I know I do!
8439265
Sorry, didn't mean it in that way. I'm in a really odd state of mind right now... :\
8439265
Sensitive much. Geez.
8439315
I was going to go on a long spiel, but this comment doesn't deserve it. I'll simply say that suicide is a sensitive topic, and not just for me, and in regards to real people it deserves to be treated as such.
I've read this before. Entertaining as ever. Upvoted.
8439324
Then maybe such people shouldn't seek things that make fun of a serious topic. That's your fault, as a reader, to have gone to a work of fiction poking a bit of fun at suicide, and then complaining when the writer does so in his own comment section. You don't see people complaining about clop in a clopfic's comments, do you?
Freedom of Speech.
8439380
Actually, I have a seen that. And that freedom goes both ways. I have equal right to complain. And as I said to the writer, it's different circumstances. Talking about a character who doesn't exist makes it humorous. We can all laugh and say, "they'd never do that!" But when it's directed at real people, it suddenly becomes literally deadly serious.
Notably, I never made an actual complaint about the story. I found it a enjoyably irreverent read, almost like something out of, say, Rick and Morty?
8439106
Yeah. You showed it to me a long time ago. I just thought it was funny how it was right there when I logged in.
8439401
People are characters. That's why we judge someone based on their character. So no, it isn't different. Your moral compass just contradicts itself, so you feel the need to claim it as not being something that it is. Either both are wrong, or neither are. You can't lean both ways and not be defying your morals. There isn't a grey area here.
And I never denied you your Freedom of Speech. I implied that a writer can write about whatever they want, and a reply to your comments can also say whatever it wants. Just because you can complain about it does not make it morally permissible to call the other person immoral for having their own set of morals that differ from yours. It is complete, hypocritical horse crap, and you know it.
8439419
I was about to let this go and go to bed but you know what? FUCK YOU. There was no problem here until you came along. Each exchange here has had me clearly state a very simple thing. You have responded each time vilifying me to greater and greater extents, and I'm done. You wanna know why I responded the way I did? BECAUSE I USED TO THINK ABOUT KILLING MYSELF. And that's something I shouldn't have had to bring up, so FUCK YOU AGAIN. I told him it was crossing a line because while this story was funny to read, being reminded of cold reality by his comment brought up old bad feelings and made me think I might slip back. And for someone who had it worse than me, his words could've made them think, hey it is a good idea to kill myself. And I don't think he's would want that on his conscience, do you? You may think you're defending the author or some other bullshit, but you're not. So FUCK OFF.
8439276
I apologize for the exchanges between me and the guy with the ironic name. This story was good, you just told a joke to a person who took it a different way. Please continue writing, and if this gets a sequel or a spin-off I'll gladly read it.
8439448
Well this hostility certainly came out of nowhere. You can't blame your problems on random people, and you certainly can't blame me for something that you decided to bring up. I hold no sympathy for you, because what you're doing is living in the past. I have been nothing but civil this entire time. You are the one showing aggression. I have done nothing wrong. I have stated my opinion, and you have tried to argue against fact. Try as you might, you cannot do that. No one but yourself is at fault for having suicidal feelings in the past. Yes, perhaps some people lead you to feel these things, but it is you who decided not to take your life, so you of all people should understand that life must go on; you must move on. You must move on to become a better person. Yet you try to prevent people from poking fun at suicide when, in reality, what depressed people NEED is to laugh and be brought back into the light. Keeping suicide inherently "serious" and unable to be joked about is not only objectively morally selfish, but it keeps the depressed in the dark. All it does is remind them of their own sadness. So if joking about suicide in a fanfic is okay, but joking about it in real life isn't, wouldn't it just be better to state that suicide should not be discussed? I mean, it would still be morally selfish of people who don't share the same standpoint, but at least there would be less moral conflict within yourself.
And here you are just lying to yourself trying to convince yourself of what is not true. I was, objectively, defending the author. What else would I be doing? It doesn't matter what angle you look at it from; I was defending him. Pretend what you will, but you know the truth. It's your choice on whether you want to admit it.
8439292
No, Meta is the protagonist of my other story. I can see how you might mistake then though...
8439315
8439315
...Are you seriously having a flame war in my comments?
I wasn't thinking about the implications, and didn't mean to offend, and I'm sorry. I'd rather that everyone drop it and stop flooding the comments with some fight over who's being rude and who's being sensitive...
8439499
I'm not having a flame war. I'm calmly discussing. If you wish for us to take it elsewhere, I will happily do so, but I'd just like to point out that I haven't been at all hostile towards him.
8439502
8439460
It's just such a weird argument, it's really not worth having, and I know at least one of you is getting upset about it, and I'd rather not have an off comment turn into that... :\
Got pretty androgynous voice that goes well with singing.
8439970
I'm known for my impressively wide vocal range (baritone to soprano), my lyrical ability, and my high-energy stage persona. I can do a screechy voice, I can do a deep country singer voice, I can do a lot of voices.
8440265 Neat. Makes me wonder what your porn voice would should like then. Mine is stuck in the basement level. Almost a parody of an orge.
8440377
Raccoon noises. Not even joking. Some guys have told me it's adorable.
Finally, a fic with ACTUAL dark humor.
8440468
Why, haven't seen many of these? At the time I wrote this, in the summer of 2011, there weren't that many "Feel-Good Dark-Comedy" stories with MLP. This might've been one of the first to not be a Cupcakes parody, actually.
Nice fic, but kinda foreseeable punchline. After I saw Pinkie couldn't kill herself first and there are other pages for her other friends, I knew she's not gonna succeed with her other friends either. But atleast you could make a fic with dark humor, that is very rare on FiMFiction.
8440518
I mean, it wouldn't be as light-hearted or feel-good if she succeeded. It's the journey that counts though! I can't say much else to my thought process when I wrote this 6 years ago...
But yeah, surprised people are saying something written so long ago is unique and original. I really should've posted this sooner...
8440593
I'm not talking about that she should have succeeded with the suicide, but still everyone can see she's gonna fail them. But still, it's funny to see how she fails them:D
I approve of this, but not your terrible structure in the first chapter. Pls go back and spam the return key.
8442184
You know, I SHOULD do that.
8442199
In that case it will be beautiful.
8442202
FIXED. :V
8440466 If I wasn't slowing deing that statement would make me hard. Instead, limp like a noodle now.
8443166
Yeah, that's the nature of the site sometimes. It's long over now though...
Well ok, that's certainly an ending.
8463886
Yep. It sure does end.
This was fucked up, but I liked it. Good job.
8478359
That's about what I was going for yeah. :V
Tell ‘em candle-sniffing fuck-fences to climb a wall o’ dicks.