Equestria has been an island continent in the Pacific Ocean for decades, and the world's nations have kept marching on.
Ivan and Katna, two Ukrainian orphans have been left by the wayside of society. In the daily struggle for survival, they've found themselves at the bottom, and their hope of a healthy future is kept from them: species transfiguration. To survive they must delve into the edges of society, go beyond the comforts of safety, and travel to the ends of the earth for each other.
Content information: science fiction, transformations, questions of personal growth, survival duo, and lots of journeying.
Editing Staff:
Chapter 1-3 Pre-readers: Scootaloser, Sorren, and Shadow_Fire.
Pre-readers: Blazing Rune and Pleaseworkforonce.
Editor: Sharp Logic.
Ivan, Katna, good luck my dears...
3957453 I think I'll be releasing another chapter by Wednesday or Thursday.
Holy edge of the seat tear gripping feel bombs!
Awesome! I don't run across pacing like this every day. It's like, the perfect balance between tense and glad. The story progression genuinely surprised me! I can't believe Ivan made that heist! I can't believe they're O.K.! The sheer indomitable spirit! Katna's precious love of learning, perfectly matches with Ivan's practicality cunning and fierce protectiveness. Sweet story! I wish you the best of success in writing it!
Fascinating reconstruction. Also quite engaging! I agree with ferret, the pacing is remarkable. I also really dig the aura of mystery. Rather than encapsulating everything, it feels like we're visiting a living, breathing world.
this is shaping up to be quite an adventure:
But I don't' understand?
Are these kids wanting to go to Equestria or
they just want to live in the woods for the rest of their days.
3970574 They don't know yet. Right now they're focused on merely surviving. And even then, they aren't sure what that will entail. They are children, they can't quite plan things out in excruciating detail. At present, they just have a monolithic concern of getting south before the winter gets really bad.
Is this at all inspired by the Conversion Beareu?
3976201 You would perhaps be best served coming into this story simply for what it is, rather than what it might be like.
Yes, a pistol! Finally they have some firepower! Oh wait... hooves. FFFF
Was there really a rat's nest in the garage bathroom? It wasn't the former owner in there, was it?
Ivan should tell Katna that she doesn't have to forget about this house. It is a very lucky find, and they can always return here if things get bad in Sevastapol.
I'm not sure how homesteading works in the Ukraine, but if they are stuck living there after all, for long enough without getting chased out, then they may even be able to claim the land as their own. 2 years might be enough time and then Ivan would be of age at least. You can do that in the U.S.A. and it still rarely happens, even though the vast majority of arable land is in the hands of a very few who chase away or kill homesteaders. Of course in the U.S.A. if you homestead long enough to claim your property, then the government shows up on your doorstep every year demanding you give them their own dollars, or they'll steal your land anyway. Property tax is so fucked up.
3978852 No hands, and Katna doesn't even have magic. A human-engineered gun is at present less than useless.
As for homesteading, my understanding of it is that it is mostly a phenomenon of the New World to encourage immigrants from the Old World of Europe, such as the Ukraine. Not to mention, this is all happening at some time in the future. Property ownership could be described as extensive but disorganized. And Sevastopol is still hundreds of miles south. They don't have the tools to expand the garden, or gather enough food for the winter. It's a house, and that means shelter for a time, but it is by no means a home. Ivan is right about that much.
As for the old rat's nest, it's exactly as Ivan said, an old rat's nest. The owner is long gone, likely somewhere in Crimea, regretting that they hadn't paid for moving all those valued treasures with them, where they might have sold the furniture other goods to help them get started on a new life.
Also, thank you very much for the comments, alongside your previous one with 3958421 , it let's me know I'm on the right track.
Zucchinni plants are not perennial like rhubarb. They are just as annual as that dead tomato plant is in temperate climates, meaning that they would have had to be planted earlier in the year or they would have outlived their life expectancy. Perhaps you knew this, but just letting you know that for me, it put some doubt into the image of a "long-abandoned house" that you seemed to be trying to portray. If this was your intention, though, carry on. Good job so far.
3978981
Moved to the Crimea and not allowed to take your beloved pistol. That is truly a Crimean punishment!
...
3979408
Seeds.
3979615
Yes, I had considered seeds. That's why I didn't say anything about the carrots—which could have easily continued to reproduce on their own. But the zucchini seemed, by description, to be planted in organized rows. If they were volunteers, they would have been more randomly strewn about.
There’s a legal office across from it to.
It's too*
Camera, pull scarf over face and keep eyes down.
So for this, I would have written it like: "A camera! I better hide my face with my scarf..." It was an old trick he had learned.
The other way just seems a tad awkward.
Walk in, grab the boxes and dart out while the pharmacist panics over a theft.
I would have kept those in italics too, like that.
Good start, I certainly haven't read such a gruesome and realistic take on the orphan genre on the site. (Well, maybe a few...) But very neat start, keep going!
Also, I was going to PM you about this, but eh. Do the Mane 6 exist in this universe?
Very nicely written, I tend to suck at writing any type of action scenes, you did really well.
3983686
Frankly from my experience it's terribly difficult to keep carrots alive even with seeds. I left a bunch of carrots just to drop all their seeds for the next year, and haven't seen a carrot there in 2 years. Tomato seeds on the other hand will sprout up places I didn't even plant 'em, and give me a whole bowl of cherry tomatoes. I haven't tried leaving squash to rot to see if that goes to seed, but I imagine it's possible if the carrots are surviving. Even rows is not what I'd expect from a garden gone wild, but if the soil was alternately "packed and mulched" and "tilled and fertilized" in rows, then I can see the plants continuing to grow in that pattern.
Seriously tomatoes will grow freaking anywhere.
3989647 The "to/too" problem is now fixed, my thanks.
As for italicizing character thoughts, it isn't the style I was going for. It's limited 3rd person omniscient in perspective, and in my readings I've found that where the narration itself blends with character thoughts at times of intense emotion/planning is the best approach.
3989649 They do exist, but with an entire world to contend with, they have their own duties and activities to attend to.
3989889
3983686
I'd say the house was quickly abandoned with a lot of the valuables kept out of the way in the attic. Grime and dust can build up quickly in a house if a door or window is left open, and chipped paint is common for houses that just aren't being taken good care of. How long specifically the house has been abandoned is perhaps not too important.
3990047
i.imgur.com/SCVx5Gf.jpg
Ivan felt two warm moist lips press against his cheek, the one without the officer’s blood on it.
So they couldn't wipe that off?
3993537 It's kind of dried and caked on and ingrained in his coat for a while.
I sure hope they run into an ally, would change the nature of the story though.
I've only read one of those and it certainly did not seem like this. I think this is his own universe, which is fine by me. 3976201
I'm liking this story. The interaction between these two feels so real,
ME WANT MORE!
Error Report: During the section in which they read the book with the dinosaur park, an italic tag is opened and never closed.
Did you mean to do the italics by the way? I think you may missed a /i, happens to me all the time.
4034853 4035053 Fixed it, thanks for pointing that out. Switching between Gdocs and fimfiction can do quite the number on formatting if one is not careful.
4033991 Above all else, above everything else that I show in this story, Ivan and Katna's relation is what I love to see audiences take as the most life-like and charming.
Don't I know it, hate formatting
4035246
Welp, nice knowing you Ivan.
Rottweilers are most dangerous dogs. Bred in Germany for the purposes of war. They can kill a full grown man hella easily, and have the temperament to do so. Step in a rottie's territory and you're just asking to be attacked by 100 pounds of solid muscle. Really you do the world a favor to kill rottweilers who have been set loose in the wild. It's not a pleasant task though. Not something children should have to face.
So... they're just going to leave the dog bleeding out in the house. Should at least drag it outside, clean up a bit. Letting a dead body rot in the house really will make it unliveable.
4037501 Indeed, a rotting corpse would render it uninhabitable, but expecting two frightened children to go so close to it as to touch it would be too much. They are quite frankly in shock and not thinking clearly.
My feels got hit in the feels.
Is this story your way of trying to make people cry? Because your ghonna break me soon enough.
Also, I give you an award for the interactions of these characters together and towards their enviroment. This, is crafted beautifully.
Best of luck, we are watching closely.
~Cyan
Ouch, caught on the loo!
Two years and three orphanages, man that's rough.
Poor ponies I hope the coast is as warm as they need it to be. It would suck for them to escape the snowy north, only to find not enough to eat despite the lack of snow. I'm really worried about Ivan. He probably doesn't even know what the warning signs are, or why it's so dangerous to get a deep puncture from a weathered, oxidized object. I reeeeally really hope the orphanages at least provided the most basic of medical care. It's a $40 shot. I really hope ponification doesn't mess that up, either!
Author, beware... of the grin. Its presence has cursed many a story. But seriously, she can't double grin. Have the first one be her biting her bottom lip or fidgeting or something cute but not grinny.
I think Ivan has trouble forgiving himself too.
4162907 Fixed: I had her facial expression change between the two instances of "grin".
Really good chapter, happy they had someone help them a little. Hopefully the priest or his friends don't have a ulterior motive
Katna's getting to be a regular firebrand. I don't know about Ivan. There's... something not right about him. A pegasus who won't fly, just because it means spending a few minutes away from your sister? And the reflexive lying, hm... oh, Gleb is awesome! No spare haha.
Don't think he realizes how much she cares for him and sees he really needs help. Pathological lying , can't stay in one place, trusts no one. Bet ya he will get paranoid if they do finally find a home to stay in. Loved the chapter
i.imgur.com/B2l6OM2.jpg
4338579 Oh dear, it looks like you're very concerned about our two foals! Rest assured this story is not even close to being one eighth finished! As Eliza Kasaan would say: It's not the end of the world, but you can see it from here.
4291484 4291601 Most definitely, both of them have been through what must amount to hell for them; it's definitely led and may continue to lead them to do questionable things. It's something to which no living thing with a thinking mind is immune.
4338684 your doing a good job so far and I love it every time I see it updated. Also your avatar pic reminds m of armored core 2. God I miss when the armored Core series was good, hopefully th next one won't be to disappointing
4338684
You owe me a new kitchen window
4338939 I'll meet you half-way and have a new chapter by tomorrow evening.
4338818 I've never played an Armored Core game myself. Granted the idea behind it is something I absolutely am interested in, but nothing has ever really stuck out to me as "This is the idea, done right". I'm also glad to know you're enjoying each update.
4338969
I.imgur.com/zjcaFRH.png
4341047 Ooh, I remember that full comic, but I can't find it anywhere! I don't suppose you have a link to the full thing, do you?
4341310
I.imgur.com/x9gFYl1.png
This- cannot be good…
Seems a bit complex... wouldn't a simple cage with a bird flying out get the point home? He does seem to be quite talented at talking his way out of a bad situation. He might make a killer diplomat if he makes it to adulthood.
Poor Gleb, but he got a lot of good done and this was inevitable I suppose. They're going to pull a hell of a rap sheet out on the guy considering the life he gave up when he lost his arm. As ugly as it sounds there are probably plenty in Gleb's situation with nothing to lose, who can replace him in the drug delivery. How many before him were locked away then?
I wonder who sent for Mikhael? Was that Gleb's doing? Mikhael and the Swift Stitch bunch must have heard that the cops picked them up somehow.
Also, first pony encounter!
wow just freaking awesome, and didn't expect a update so quickly either! Looks like Cirrus is completely a pony now , wonder what kind of mark salmon will earn :o