Oh it was on now.
The blow was admittedly more powerful than I thought, and my head snapped to the side as I stumbled backwards. I heard the Mane Six and Spike gasp. I glared up at Celestia, who had a hoof raised like she planned on hitting me again. I could see vague hints of what appeared to be rage in her eyes, but instead of hitting me again, she let out a deep, frustrated breath and lowered her hoof. "TD, I know this is shocking for you, and I'm sorry that I did that. You must understand that punching me repeatedly has consequences."
I regained my balance and fixed her with a fiery glare that was hopefully a new alicorn power that I could hurt her with. No such luck. Instead I shouted a war cry and rugby tackled her, knocking us both to the ground. I repeatedly slammed my hoof into her side. Her front hooves pressed against my chest, and she shoved me off. I went flying and, with a surprising amount of speed, she was on me in a second. She used one of her forelegs to hold my neck down, and pummeled my chest with her other hoof. I began flailing around, trying to get her off of me. Her strength meant that I couldn't wiggle away, but I managed to uppercut her. Her flinching gave me enough time an momentum to push her off with my hind hooves and roll to the side. Her hoof came down a fraction of a second too late to hit me, and it cracked the ground where it impacted.
Well as you may have guessed, the Sun Goddess of all of Equestria getting into a brutal fight with another alicorn that nobody had ever seen before drew some attention. A lot of it, actually. A crowd of wide-eyed, open mouthed ponies had gathered to watch a fight that both sides felt was a long time coming.
I tried to stand up to get some space to plan another attack, but Celestia returned my rugby tackle with one of her own. The force of her tackle knocked us backwards into one of the walls of the library. The whole building vibrated with the force of the impact, and I would be rather surprised it none of the books fell off the shelves.
Celestia began punching me right in the kidneys, but I punched her right where I think her ovaries would be. She flinched back, allowing me to get a few more shots there. She recovered quickly enough, and slammed both of her forehooves onto the sides of my head. I fell to the ground, clutching at where she made the impact. She stood over me, breathing heavily from our fight.
"As I said, TD. Punching me repeatedly has consequences. I must ask that we stop this."
The ringing in my head subsided, and I fixed her with another glare. "NEVER!"
Thus began round two.
I was ready for her blows to my head, so I knocked her hoof back whenever she tried and returned it with punches right in her mouth. To compensate, she moved to punching me in my soft underbelly. I forced myself to ignore the excruciating pain, and I kept hitting her in the face.
"Is this kinda hot to anybody else?" I heard one of the townsponies mutter.
"Yep," Spike replied quietly.
That stopped the fight for a second as both of us glared at the ones who had spoken. I growled at the townspony, who turned out to be Caramel, while Celestia leered at Spike. That must not have been very fun for him. First Celestia gets mad at him, then Twilight will probably chew him out for making Celestia mad. On top of that, Rarity will be hurt that he said something so boorish.
The lull in the fighting doesn't last too long, and I restarted it with the same double hoof slam that Celestia used on me. She squealed in pain, something that's odd to hear, let me tell you, and I punched her in the shoulders, hoping to disable her legs to gain a full advantage. She batted one of my hooves away, and we locked eyes for the first time since the fight began. I have to say, I had never seen her so angry. Her eyes were literally glowing white, and it was bright enough that I couldn't look into them.
"ENOUGH!"
Her Royal Canterlot Voice was more impressive than Luna's by far. For the first time since the fight began I felt a little nervous. Celestia's horn ignited, and I was thrown back into the library once again by the force of her spell. Yep, books definitely flew from the shelves that time. In fact, I even left a small impact crater.
I slid down on the ground, the pain in my back preventing me from moving. I groaned, but managed to look up at her. She was glaring at me with the intensity of a thousand suns, but I was satisfied when I saw that I had succeeded on some level: she was bruising. Purple and black marks were appearing underneath her pure white coat. I had no doubt that I had dozens of my own, but seeing her like this was very gratifying, even if she was about to obliterate me.
"TD, I expected better from you!" Celestia snarled. "I know that this is a shock to you. It is to me as well!" She stomped a few steps closer to me and powered down her horn. "This isn't the way to behave." Celestia sighed and closed her eyes, the fight draining from her. "However, I know that I didn't act in a manner befitting my royal status myself."
"I wouldn't worry about it," I said through clenched teeth. "We all have those moments of weakness." I slowly pushed myself to my hooves and raised my head to her level. "Though if you're going to be using magic, I am too!"
I squeezed my eyes shut and, with all of my mental might, I began channeling all of my energy into my new horn. Now, I imagined that I would produce a beam of magic that would send Celestia flying back to Canterlot. What I got instead was a few blue sparks.
"Oh come on!" I glared at my new horn. "How does this stupid thing work?"
"You're new to magic, TD," Celestia explained. I glanced over at her and saw the slightest of smirks on her face. "Learning magic takes time."
I scowled and flared out my new wings. "Whatever. This isn't over." I jumped into the air, expecting that my wings would carry me high in the sky and I could attack Celestia that way. I really should have learned that my expectations aren't always met, and I figured out what happens when you crash into the ground after a few feet. "You have got to be kidding me!"
"Flight isn't natural, even with wings." Celestia gave me a sad smile and extended a hoof. "Come now, TD. Let's go to the library and discuss this like rational alicorns."
"I'm not a rational alicorn," I spat. I groaned and laid down on my side. "But I am an alicorn. Fine way to start out."
Celestia's hoof nudged my side, and I reluctantly took it. She pulled me up before turning to address the crowd. "I am sorry that this has just occurred, but Princess TD and I had some differences to work out."
Ever the politician, aren't you Celestia? And also don't call me that.
"As you can see, TD is now an alicorn princess by means unforeseeable to any. It is unknown at this time what that means exactly, but rest assured I will do everything in my power to make this unexpected event as smooth as possible for everypony."
"And if anybody even thinks about bowing to me I will raze Ponyville," I growled. "I mean it."
"Yep, that's TD alright," Mayor Mare muttered.
Celestia raised a hoof and motioned to the crowd. "I ask you now to return to your business. Princess TD and I have some things to discuss."
The crowd began murmuring amongst themselves, but they weren't exactly going to argue with the pony who raised the sun each morning. I began limping into the library, and I was satisfied to see that Celestia was doing the same. Twilight opened the door for us, and I was vaguely amused to see that she looked absolutely furious. Celestia and I entered first, and promptly sat on the ground when we were far enough inside. The floor was absolutely covered in books, but Celestia managed to use her magic to put them all back on the shelves.
Twilight and the rest of the Mane Six plus Spike all entered the library behind us. Twilight scanned the bookshelves, checking to see if they were all in the right place. If she didn't re-shelve later I would eat my wings. The rest of them had expressions on their faces ranging from awkwardness to plain old shock. Doubtlessly they had never seen Celestia like that before.
It was Celestia who cleared her throat to get the conversation going. "I imagine what has happened today has shocked all of you. Between TD's ascension and our little scuffle, things haven't quite gone how I had planned them."
"Understatement of the millennium," I snarked. I stared down at my new hooves and flapped my wings. "I mean geez, I woke up today as a human whose house was about to be struck by lightning and now I'm a female alicorn princess."
"I know this must be difficult, TD," Celestia said. "So I want us all to be as comfortable as possible before we delve into the heavy topics." Celestia turned to Twilight with a small smile on her face. "Twilight, I don't suppose you have any liquor around."
Twilight groaned and facehooved. "I never thought I'd say something like this to you of all ponies, but I'm not sharing my liquor with you!"
I raised an eyebrow and cocked my head. "You have alcohol here?"
"I drink a glass of scotch socially on occasion," said Twilight with a wave of her hoof. "That's not important right now. What is important is what I saw from both of you today." Twilight fixed Celestia with a sad stare, and flattened her ears. "I never thought that I'd see you like that. If you'll pardon me for saying so, it looked almost... animalistic. You two looked like lions fighting each other for a piece of meat." Twilight bowed her head. "I never thought you were capable of acting like that."
Celestia and I exchanged an awkward glance, and I lightly cleared my throat. "Uh, Twilight, if it makes you feel any better, I was the instigator and I kept it going. I think that she could argue self-defense."
Celestia held up a hoof and shook her head. "As much as I appreciate your attempts to repair my reputation, I erred as well, TD. I could have stopped that fight whenever I desired." Celestia fluttered her wings and poked at the ground. I have to say, it was odd seeing her in a position of vulnerability like that. She almost looked like a kid with her hoof in the cookie jar.
"Why would you do that?" Twilight alternated her looks between the two of us. "I mean, hitting you is just kinda something that TD does when he's past his breaking point, but why would you retaliate when you knew he wasn't a threat?"
"I suppose it was because I was scared." Twilight gasped softly, and Celestia looked back up at her. "I may regret saying this, but TD was not meant to ascend today. You were."
Twilight's jaw dropped, and her eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. She took a small step backwards. "M-me?"
"Indeed." Celestia spotted the journal on the bed and motioned over to it. "A lot of what you have accomplished has been leading up to this point. I had great plans for you, and I was excited to see what kind of pony you would be after became the Princess of Friendship." Celestia's gaze flickered over to me, and she sighed. "I suppose that when I saw TD I resented him a little. I felt that he had taken something important from me: you. When he hit me for a third time, I lost myself for a little while."
Despite the situation, I chuckled slightly and put a hoof on Celestia's shoulder. "It's okay. I've resented you since I came here." Celestia shot me a sideways glance, and my smile fell. "But I know it doesn't look like it, but I've been trying to get over it. I mean..." I spun my hoof. "It's not like you planned all of this for me. I just lose my temper sometimes and since my angry self blames you the most it comes out against you the most."
"I understand that, TD," said Celestia. "I know that my actions have not always benefited you."
"And I haven't always handled it the best." I sighed and ran a hoof through my hair... er... mane. "But I guess the question is: what now?"
Celestia pushed herself to her hooves, wincing slightly as she did. "I do not know. I think it might be prudent for you to come back to Canterlot with me so that we may discuss it with Luna."
Celestia looked over at Twilight who still looked absolutely shocked by what she had heard, but there seemed to be a hint of sadness in her eyes too. I don't think that I could have blamed her. This is a pretty big thing for her to miss out on. I motioned over to the other six in the room and jerked my head to the door. They silently nodded and filed out of the library. I left last and closed the door behind me.
I think that they needed some alone time, and what was going to be said was just for them.
hey if being alicorn changed is possible for any species im sure twilight will become one just not today so still hope there.
Spike shoulda been an alicorn princess(in canon). I mean, he got turned into a mangy mutt but was still more sensible than Twilight. He probably could have thrown down better than TD, to boot, not to mention getting to fight with his hot
momprincess.when i say princess TD outloud it kinda sounds like prince STD
Ahem, from the first opus of this universe, chapter three, page and line whatever:
Celestia better eat those words one day, to our great amusement and TD's eternal dismay.
"I this kinda hot to anybody else?" I heard one of the townsponies mutter.
"Yep," I heard Spike say quietly.
I died.
Yeah, there's a typo pointed out in Reignbow's comment, but I'll re-highlight it here:
I should be is.
I have to ask though. At what point does main story canon end? Did they still go to the Gala here, only to have Luna break his spine?
3030977
He explained somewhere else that this isn't cannon, iirc. The main story is continuing with wanderings.
3030951 someone get the royal chef they need to prepare a fine dish to go with celestia's words
And once they left, Twilight let out a breath of relief! "Thank goodness I won't have to deal with being an alicorn! Why, I'd probably end up going insane when my friends and family die, because clearly becoming immortal makes me incapable of handling death which I've already seen quite a few times in my life without going bat-shit insane, and go into some psycho depression and kill everything with some sorta dark powers or something that I get from the Elements of Harmony because it would totally make sense that totems of perfect harmony would let me use their power to wipe out all life on the planet!"
Twilight glares at a number of fanfic writers, "Yeah... makes perrrrrrfect sense, doesn't it?"
"Anyway," she continued. "Now TD is stuck with phenomenal cosmic powers and immortality and thousands of ponies bowing to him... her... it... whatever! Yep, living in the lap of luxury while I and my 5 friends are here in this little podunk town... always having to stop all the demons and monsters... never even getting paid... for saving the world repeatedly..."
She grits her teeth, "TD... I'm going to get those powers from you if I have to use Pinkie's basement equipment to get those wings off you..."
(Let the madness begin! )
Good If TD gets good enough at magic he can change his gender back to male, and shape shift into a human form. So he has something to work towards at least.
3030986 I know that this is AU, which is why I asked where the main story canon ended. I know the first time TD punched Celestia was upon meeting her, but I could swear the other time was at the Gala where Luna broke his spine, hence my asking.
3031051 Yeah, it was. Uh... I'll put this a few months after the Gala.
3031051
And what I'm telling you is that the main story hasn't ended, and is in fact continuing, if by "main" you mean "cannon". The first part ended with TD leaving Ponyville and traveling throughout other lands. His travels are described in the second part of the cannon story Wanderings of a Non-Brony.
Is it just me, or did it seem like Celestia and TD were enjoying themselves during that fight?
3031062 Thanks. I can only imagine how well TD and Luna will get along upon seeing the state of both TD and Celestia.
Could we possibly see more alicorn cat-fights? Oh! Maybe we'll get another crippling episode! You could call it TD: The Recripling... Wait, that's kinda morbid.
Still, can't wait.
3031089 Honestly? .... Honestly? I think they were. XD This is going to become their new friendship dynamic, isn't it? XD Friendship over physical assault and recovery together. XD
"her"
"Is" and "anypony" (altough you could technically get away with using anybody, but it kinda feels slightly off)
you know TD, kicking somone in the ovaries wouldnt hurt any more than being kicked anywhere else. But plus points for effort. One sexy marefight and some awkward situations later and it seems like thing might have calmed down a bit.
3030949 Ahahahahaha. Friggin genious.
3030951 She did make a promise like that didn't she? Well it looked like those punches hurt her so I guess that means only one thing. Celestia have to hoof over the crown of Equestria and then watch as TD brings the kingdom to complete anarchy.
I've don't have ovaries, but I would imagine that would be...... rather painful!
Can't wait to see how TD deals with she who shattered his spine. They never did had much interactions after the Gala. Maybe he'll return the favor! Ah, wishful thinking....
Well, at least TD has company on the "Universe's chew toy" bus this time.
3031123
Fighting is Magic
3030793 Yeah I hear you............. now don't you have a certain story to complete writing?! What are you doing slack off, actually reading something else?! Back to work!
Don't worry TD! I'm sure Discord can return your dick to you!! ^-^
"Princess TD", by the Emperor, I'm wriggling on the floor because of you.
By the way, you owe me new carpet because of that, BronyWriter.
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MORE CHAPTERS
TD
The ONLY human to get into a fight with a sun goddess.
And make a human in to pony tranceformation a good thing.
I like this
wait, if two mares get into a fight... is it still called a cat fight? filly fight?
Oh well, another mystery of women that will never be solved.
3030951 Oh lord, it's all come to pass! Of course, this could all be a ploy for Celestia to step down and get a vacation!
Well TD becoming an TG Alicorn technically would count as a threat to and or lack of Harmony so thus the hole situation could be fix by the elements.
3031215 i think you mean transformation
3031328 Meh, its 6 in the morning where I am.
I am entitled to some spelling mistakes
3031342 Where are you?, its like 9 P.M here in Mexico
3031136 I'm a usual here, practically everyday. I love ponies!!!!!AHAHAHAHAHA
I hoped there be brawling.
And there was.
I was not disappointed.
I almost hoping the fight would end with them sharing a drink, saying "Good fight." and suddenly being friends, no questions asked.
But it wouldn't be worth the joke.
3031349 Scratch that it's only 3:50 here, the clock on my computer is wrong.
Also I am in England
Loved that chapter. That fight scene was just right. Can't find the right word for it, but it just belongs there and you did a good job with it.
Its just nice to see Celly "get loose" and drop the ever-present royal mask.
I couldn't stop grinning the whole way.
3031189 Mane6 approves. XD
Just gotta say Tia, I ain't helping you with shit.
You know what would be funny if the pony citizens started changing TD into a full fledged pony name.
The nobles would argue that it sounds too normal and so they expand it.
His name is now Terrible Diarrhea or Tinny Dick... XD
Lol, just a part on the nobles trying to change his name would be hilarious. XD
3030951
That was my first thought as well. There were certainly witnesses to that statement; it'll be hilarious to see Celestia held to it, especially if she'd forgotten saying it.
3031479
Come to think of it, I don't actually know what TD stands for in the first place. Was it in the the original story and I simply missed it?
Have a nice day.
EpsilonWinter
3031543
If I remember correctly the ponies asked that or something like that and TD just replied that it really was his name, nothing more and nothing less.
It really was TD.
Though I think this is right I might be incorrect, we might have to check with the author about this or someone who has recently read the very beginning of the original story, first book. (First book because it's kinda like season one but it's not a TV show.)
If it was a shortened version though, what do you think it could be?
Or even better, what ridiculous princess name can you turn it into? XD
3031206 Will do!
3031543>>3031553 The first chapter states that his name is just TD. If it stood for anything, it would be T.D.
3031575>>3031543
Yep, thought so, thank you for clearing this up.
Seriously though, would there be a chance that a scene like this could happen?
The nobles totally messing with his name and changing it into something ridiculous due to his original being to bland? XD
I would find it funny.
Poor Twilight getting told she missed out on becoming an alicorn. Now all she has left is to go drink her life away knowing fate cheated her out of her destiny and be found a couple months later in a ditch after OD'ing on salt.
Hmm, I have just read the second chapter. I'm surprised that TD didn't bring up Celetias' negligence in this matter ("Spike would have been a fantastic Princess," scoffed Celestia as TD sobbed over her lost genitals) but given that they just had a punch up, rocking the boat was probably not a priority. I look forward to how Twilight and the main sextet will deal with TD in the future, Twilight has lost her grand destiny to someone whom she has had to work to be civil with before, and now has taken the achievement of all her work. I cannot imagine she or her friends will be able to simply shrug that off even if they try, especially with TD resenting it no less.
The obvious answer for this story would be for the elements to transfer the power of the Alicorn to Twilight, and to revert TD to his true form, however given narrative convention and the fact Celestia did not immediately demand it means that the problem cannot be resolved that easily. I look forward to seeing how this story progresses, and to how Luna will deal with both the new TD and what he did to Celestia.
Have a nice day.
EpsilonWinter
3031670
Nonsense, she will instead kidnap TD and stitch his wings unto herself!
"Now what was stolen, had been returned, and the universe is as it should be" sighed the contented Frankencorn.
"Oh god! I get why you wanted the wings but couldn't you have knocked me out before ripping them off!?" Sobbed the new Unicorn as she bled on the laboratory floor.
"Of course I could, but then your sin of daring to besmirch Celestias' fine coat would have gone unpunished!"
Have a nice day.
EpsilonWinter
3031732
Either that or she might grab the Alicorn Amulet, take his wings off with the magical Mouse function on it, and plant them on herself! INSTANT-ALICORN!
"And if anybody even thinks about bowing to me I will raze Ponyville," I said. "I mean it."
Glorious!
I do believe Celestia once told T.D. that she would hand over the kingdom to him if he ever managed to cause her pain.
Is his cutie mark an atom bomb? Here's hoping!