Diary of a Ruler

by Lamia

Entry 1 - Purpose

I received this diary as an anonymous gift out of many offered from the denizens of Canterlot. It grabbed my attention as it seemed to stand out from the rest. Jewelry, art, and sugar delights are fine gifts, but this seemed to give me pause.

I had not considered the use of one of these in all my years. However, I find myself staring at these blank pages, unsure what to document. I am told that the best option is to simply write anything that comes to mind. Go over your day, how you dealt with everything, whatever was notable.

The problem is that very little stands out in my queendom. We have enjoyed a peace that has lasted for many centuries under my rule. I watch the ponies of the land live out their days within that peace, and it comforts me. Though, as of late, I have contemplated over the notion of peace and comfort. Is contentment all that I strive for? Can there be more that I can accomplish in my life?

I attempted to delve into the art of painting; it requires a steady concentration and much patience. As I have both, I developed and mastered my skill at painting within seventy years. My work is framed in houses and galleries across Equestria. Numerous ponies from all over auction the pieces between each other. In another hundred years, however, painting no longer gave me the satisfaction I desired. The hobby was set aside.

In time, I became interested in the study of magic. Ever since the day I was shown how to control the celestial objects, I have been curious as to its workings. Throughout my long life I have studied countless books. I have met with accomplished theorists and magicians, hearing their ideas and comparing them to my own. There are spells that I have created that I share now and again. The world of magic seems endless; there is still much to research even for me, but I simply have lost interest after over two centuries worth of study. I may return to it, however. Time is something I do have.

Theatre was another activity that I had spent much time on. Acting for the ponies of the land became a passion, and I recall it fondly. To integrate into an identity other than a princess... It was a joy, as being royalty was all I knew. I played as heroes, villains, sidekicks, background characters, even props. However, as I was the princess of Equestria, my choice in acting could not be challenged, and many became interested in seeing only me. I felt a heavy guilt as I realized that fact with the various troupes I worked with. Soon, I abandoned the pastime as I no longer wanted to interfere.

On occasion, even now, I travel the world and see its many places and its occupants. For years at a time I will stay away from my home in Equestria, to see and live in new places. Unfortunately, eventually everything becomes a kind of monotony for me. Though, I can admit, the ponies that I meet can sometimes make my experiences a bit more interesting.

When I look upon all the ponies of the world, they all recognize me, young and old. I never recognize them... I cannot. Within the early years of my life, I connected closely with many individuals, much to my mother's protests. She let me be, however, so that I may learn...

For centuries, I tried and tried once more to discover friends and lovers. As their lives dwindled before my own extensive one, I felt cheated. Why did they deserve to have less time than I did? Why must I stay longer? Is there a further purpose to my life that I have not discovered?

Nevertheless... I swore off love for an individual, after losing so many. I do not make very many close friends after constantly losing them... Despite what the Elements of Harmony have taught me, when those ponies disappear from before my eyes, said elements lose their meaning. Even so, I do know that it lives within all of us, should we decide it. I may act on the opportunity again, someday.

I have carried on quite a bit on this first diary entry. I suppose I may be able to fill the pages after all.

Comments

[White Wolf]

Celestia's P.O.V. This will be an eye opener. Maybe we'll get to see how she really feels about Luna's 1000 year banishment at her own hooves.