• Member Since 29th Mar, 2013
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Well, sir, I am intrigued. I always did want to try my hoof at creating a successful villain, and this seems like a good practice run for that. Rest assured that I am following this and intend to do what I can to shape the life of this new threat to Equestria. :trixieshiftleft:

Meanwhile, if you manage to get an artist and can make this an actual Tumblr blog, please let us know so we can follow you.

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I am glad you are intrigued. I hope that this manages to keep your interest and fulfill to exceed your expectations.

What is the limit on mutations, and what do you mean by mutations? Also, I'd like to see him go stir shit up in las pegasus.


• Give the chosen these items
Give the chosen armour that can only be pierced by the most powerful of attacks.
Give the chosen a sword imbued with an inraged and insane windigo so that the can unleash it in combat.
Give the chosen a third eye so that he can predict the immediate future.
Give the chosen four marks:
The mark of Khorne his will give him a magical resistance and unmatched bloodlust.
The mark of Tzeentch his will give the chosen an unholy barrier if the armour is pierced.
The mark on Nurgle his will make the chosen's body bloated with disease,pestilence and rot but will allow him to feel no pain.
The mark of Slaanesh his will give him speed and finesse unmatched in all things.
Give the chosen a steed of great power so that the chosen can ride it into battle.
Give the chosen a crown that will inbolden your allies and strike terror into the hearts of your enemies.

Six Treasures shall be his Mark. Forged from the Other World, six treasures shall he Possess.

Upon his head the Crown shall see all, and Open Eye will prove woe to mortal kind.

Then shall he ride unto the world. Here will be Two united unto One.

And five shall be the armies of Doom. Then will the world know that the Last War has begun.

With the coming of doom will march a lowly boy. Anger shall be his nourishment and blood his wine.

And from the land tamed will rise a champion. Disease shall be his downfall and savior divine.

A King's son shall be the Chosen. In power will he thrive and glory in his name.

And with the coming of the End of Times, the Old will fall by the Hand of the New.

3A

Rape ALL the mares:pinkiecrazy:

"I accept the assignment, Cryon and Pyrus. It will be in my own interests to help darken Equestria, and I sense you are kindred spirits to myself. It will be my utmost pleasure to aid you.

"However, I have a few clarifying questions to ask. First, I echo Total-Eclipse in wondering how precisely these mutations might work. Secondly, I would like to know if Celestia and Luna might be able to affect us if they notice us. If so, I will need to make... preparations. Finally, I would like some clarification on the technological advances in Equestria at the moment. I know you have coal-powered trains and rudimentary cinema technology at the very least, as the Homebranch of Equestria does. But is this one of those offshoot Equestrias with enhanced technology, and if so, to what extent? Comparable to Halo tech, perhaps? Or perhaps more along the lines of steampunk culture? This will be crucial to knowing how best to guide our young minion. Can't very well have him build a suit of power armor if there is no concept of such in this Equestria.

"In conclusion, I look forward to working with you and assure you that I will do my utmost to keep this young colt firmly within the dark side."

I must admit, I relish the challenge of changing a weakling into a titan of chaos. The Everfree Forest is certainly the right place for this task. I would recommend the Timberwolves as his first challenge. It will lead his body to increase it's speed and endurance, one of the oldest sayings often quotes one who fights but runs away...If the pack is persistent, which it will be, he runs a decent chance of developing fire based abilities to drive them back. One thing that cannot be allowed to happen, he must NOT be driven towards Zecora, she is much to close to Twilight and the others...although it would provide opportunity to steal the Alicorn Amulet back...she still has the thing...I think she is using it as a replacement for the doorstop she loaned Twilight as the fake amulet.

With Respect,

Magus Neon, Equestrian Nomad

Hmm a new challenge,I am already making my plans.Now as a suggestion i think you should send him somwhere along the borders of Equestria try to make it look like Griffins did it that will cause some mischief.

the ever present,
God of the Dragons

Bidden as we were, we answer the brother's plea.

Their latest weapon shall be ours, our vessel, our instrument of change. Our conduit to Equestria... we claim him as our own.

Now, little colt- you're no stranger to hardships- surely there's a way out of this forest, and to safety. You only need to find it; find some hint at other, possibly friendly equines nearby. Surely they can help you. And perhaps you could even repay them somehow once they did. You'll think of something when it comes to that. Off you go...

Food. That needs to be your first priority. This is a forest, I'm sure there's something you can eat safely. And if you happen to find some fool wandering around the forest... well, taking their food by force should suffice to teach them a lesson about wandering around strange forests alone.

Pony, you have been chosen to be a champion of chaos and hate. I am known as a Watcher. There is a zebra living in these woods, Even she has a cutie mark. You must use your anger and spite to put an end to her. You have developed a disease called the Star of Woe, making you able to develop mutations to help you in something small as finding food, or something big, such as combat. The zebra has a powerful artifact that I believe could more than triple your power. She also has food. Think about it, you can release all of your anger and frustration on her, increase your power, and find food in one fell swoop. But I leave the choice to you.

Listen well my friend. You are in the Everfree Forest, a place of danger, but you must not leave it yet. You have been given a gift known as the Star of Woe. It shall grant you power, but you must work for it. Seek the ruined castle of the Two Pony Sisters, there you will find the last whisps of Nightmare Moon. Call to them, absorb them into your being, and become endowed with the vapor form of the Mare in the Moon.

Listen for my Voice, You may call me Nomad.

We Shall speak again.

3009365
Perhaps a journey to the ruined castle first, read my previous post. It would be good to be untouchable when the time comes to confront the Zebra witch.

3010093 Ah, yes, what was I thinking? Nomad is right, Pony. To increase your power you must have something to increase first. I even forgot to introduce myself. I am Eclipse. Remember me, for I will be with this journey till the end, lest something urgent arise.

Blood lust and rage nothing but blood lust and rage. To kill, to slaughter to sacrifice to Kharneth our glorious and great blood god, and remember he does not care from where the blood flow only that it flows.

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD, SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE

3010377
Calm yourself friend. Bloodshed and murder are all well and good, but we must build our wards strength before any rampages can occur.

Well done. You have found the castle and thus, shelter. When you have rested, seek the throne room. There, you will sense a lingering presence, it will feel like static on your fur. Go to the spot in the room where it feels Strongest and get Angery. Curse Celestia and the sun, call on the night to prtect you...you will not be dissappointed.

Once you claim the power offered to you by the night, your worst memories will flash before your eyes. Every betrayal, every lie ever spoken to you. You will recall the cruelty of the ponies in your life and see thier greed flash before your eyes. Finally you will understand TRUE anger, how dare other ponies experience joy when you have so little! Then, as you realize that "Harmony" is an illusion, you will see shards of stone from around the room fly to you. They will merge into a dagger of black crystal before your eyes. This weapon is the Blade of Despair, and it shall grow in power, and size, as you do. This will be your weapon, and your tool.

Use it well.

Nomad

Listen to Nomad he means well.The nightmare shall help on your path.Let it be known that you shall crush these INFERIOR PONIES.You will crush their skulls beneath your hooves.You shall rain supreme with your alicorn brothers.I am Insanity hear my voice like the howling wind on a winter night.

Much as I hate it, I have nothing new to add. Nomad is right in saying you must embrace the night. Insanity is correct in saying harmony will fall. But, Zecora must FUCKING DIE. Unquestionable. You need that Amulet.

[You fools, stop mentioning your names! You'll confuse him!]

Er, ahem. As an alternate viewpoint, you might try cursing the night instead. Ponies don't tend to look kindly on denizens of darkness, but as a lord of light? Who could possibly want you dead as a harbinger of the light? It would be far safer.

3031718
Heh, I give names to the voices in MY head...why shouldn't he. As for claiming the sun/day and becoming accepted as a lord of light, it is an interesting concept. However, without the night, the Blade of Despair will not form. Also, a lord of the dark has ways of avoiding attention...a light lord is not exactly inconspiquous.

A thought occours to me, Zecora is mortal and thus, corrutable. The Blade of Despair can bring out the inner darkness in a pony...or zebra. She was shunned and scorned, treated as an outcast for years. That resentment and anger is still there. Infect her with the Blade of Despair, and you will gain an ally with an expertise in potion brewing, as well as a base of opperations in the Everfree...that dosen't have holes in the walls/ceiling.

Nomad

Best get your back up against a wall. You're outnumbered, so let's at least limit the directions they can come at you. Then wait for them to lunge before you strike. It worked before, it should work again.

Your new weapon yearns for battle. Observe the pack, made of wood or not, they are still wolves. Find their Alpha, the one they look to for orders. Challenge him and kill him. Once you slay him, you will gain your first minions in the remnents of the pack. If they won't follow you...kill them. Be sure to save some of their sap, there should be a flask behind the throne, Luna's old moonshine stash. Timberwolf sap/blood is quite toxic when ingested and it's always a good idea to carry a poison with you.

Nomad

As another wolf lunges at you, lightning shall launch from the obsidian blade, shocking the wolf, and unlocking a new power.

Now within your heart young mortal is despair can you feel it there good now let it fester and let it rot and as your heart and soul rot so will your body. Your body will bloat and fester with worm and fly with rot and disease but their is an upside you will no longer become sick and no longer will you feel any pain. Do so and become closer to your destiny as the bringer of the end time.

3038373
With lightning the blade emerged, lightning is still within the blade. Use it as you will.

Now within your heart young mortal is lust can you feel it there good. Now let it merge with the star and in doing so you we able the talk your way out of anything, seduce anyone and if they give themselves mind body and soul you can take their souls and they will become your undying slave and it will allow a hell screech a screech so powerful it will rupture organs and turn bone to dust. Do this and become closer to your destiny as the bringer of the end time.

Listen well pony, a source of great power rests in this hut. It is an amulet with a red jewel at its center and stylized to resemble an Alicorn. You will soon see a zebra, observe her subtle beauty, hunger for her. You will seduce her and claim her. The Star will use her lust to taint her mind, and bind her to you. Once she is yours, have her fetch the power you feel nearby, it is the Alicorn Amulet and it will enhance your powers and the Star of Woe will prevent the Amulet from corrupting your mind, it will even enhance your mental barriers. Use this place as a refuge...for the moment. You will feel restless, return into the Everfree and follow the scent of brimstone, the dragon at the end is your next challenge, and its fire breath and hoard shall be your reward.

Nomad

(Below this point is to the author)

If this idea is used fully, clop only needs to be HINTED at. No actual sex scene has to occur, but I leave that is your perogative, not mine.

Good Luck

Magus Neon, Equestrian Nomad

3049473
(The amulet could be detrimental. We need his mind to be orderly and open to our suggestions- that little bauble will make him too random, too insane too quickly to properly control. We can't use a fool who's distrustful of wheels, or other such inane nonsense. Better we make him find it, find a way to divorce most of its power from its curse, and make somepony else wear it. They would make for a fine distraction...)
Remember how you thought you could help the ponies (or other creatures) who help you? Here's your chance. If the owner is as friendly as he/she seems, you can try to befriend them in return. Perhaps even more. You've lived in an overcrowded city far too long, you long for something... exotic... to eventually claim as your own. If you feel yourself connect to the other equine in a strange, unusual way, don't fight it. It'll be alright, for you and for her; if she eventually comes to act exactly as you tell her to, who are you to deny such a gift? It's not like you did anything evil, you are merely connecting to her...

3050208
(The star of Woe won't allow the mind of the host to be corrupted...much. As a semi-sentient source of dark power, it will recognize and nullify detrimental effects on the host...take the Timberwolf Blood, ingesting it should have killed him, but it changed HIS blood to a poison and increased his resistance to poisoning. The Star will take the corrupting effects of the Amulet and turn it into enhanced resistance to mental attack/coersion.)

3A

Once you have bound the zebra to you, have her be you slave and companion.

Hmm, this zebra is a pretty one. Pretty but dangerous. Do not let your guard down, do not play your hoof too soon. She could be a potent ally, or a dangerous foe. Whatever you choose to do, do not give her cause to suspect you of being dangerous until it is too late for her to stop you.

3053658
Agreed. You must win her, but feel free to take your time. Make her fall for you whether it takes a day, a week, or a month. Learn potions from her and gain her trust.

3053658
3054407
Aye. Get to know her better, learn from her, learn about her. You're rightly curious, after all, and she's been nice so far. Be nice back- hide some of the... unsual things that happened to you, you wouldn't want to worry her, eh? And if you find a way to make her even nicer to you, take it. You're just giving her nudge, after all- no harm in that.

(Discord, Sombra, even Trixie- they were too caught up in their role as villains. We could try a different route with him, feed his delusions, make him believe he was good until he can no longer see his own evil deeds. Let's give the ponies something they're not prepared to fight!)
3053633
Slave is such an ugly word; yet you wonder whether Zebra society has something like that. Do they enslave each other? Do they use magic, or potions, or something else entirely? Would it work on her? Again, there's no harm in sating your curiosity.

Well-done. She trusts you, she likes you, and you have become far more persuasive. Now, force nothing on her, but should she decide to make a move of any sort on you, embrace it. Or should I say, embrace her? Heh.

Once she's had intercourse with you, she'll fall under your spell. She won't be able to refuse your commands, and you can do as you please with her. Now, the more sex you have with her, the harder it will be for her to break free, so I heartily recommend bucking her a few times to ensure her compliance. And don't worry, she'll retain her conversational abilities; it is more of a redirection of her moral compass. Instead of believing in the abstract concepts of "good" and "evil", she'll believe that whatever you desire is right and whatever would hinder you is wrong. A refreshing change from those who scorned you and felt that all you did was wrong, no? You're simply soliciting reparation for these injustices.

[I was actually rather impressed with the rhyme scheme. Writing Zecora is no easy thing. That being said, I can't say I understand your decision to center her dialogue; I feel it is somewhat distracting. However, it is your story, and far be it from me to dictate its course in any ways you have not authorized.]

3A

Make your move in the morning, then she shall be yours.

Very good pony. You are on your way to winning this mares heart. DO NOT BUCK THIS UP!!! Zecora is a true catch. Charming and intelligent, skilled in healing arts which, lets face it, you won't last long without. Now, hold her tight through the night. When you wake, act the gentlecolt and apologize for the uninvited embrace, though I doubt she will mind. Go through the day, a touch of tail to side hear, a congradulation nuzzle there, and kind words and compliments scattered throughout. She will be yours. Remember, once you mate her, you have an Amulet to claim and a Dragon to fight. The corrupting influence of the Alicorn Amulet will aid you in truly claiming Zecora as yours...do not fail us.

(To Pyrus)

(I am guiding the pawn towards the dragon that makes his home in the Everfree. The dragons hoard will aid him in acquiring useful materials, and by/during the killing of the dragon I recommend gaining the ability to consume flame to heal as well as fire breath. :See Dragon Slayer Magic: Since you are the De-facto Deity of the dragons of this realm, I thought you deserved a heads up.)

Nomad

(I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ZECORAS WRITING SCHEME! No, not really, I know how hard it is to write for her and you managed very well.)

Sweet. You got her in the same bed. Now, when you wake up, you will notice that your sense of smell has amped up quite a bit. After messing around with the ability a bit, you will find that you can control it. Two scents are clear throughout all others. Brimstone, and the smell of nature itself, pulling you somewhere. Follow the brimstone, and gain the breath and treasures of a dragon (Part of the Dragon Legacy). Follow the pull of nature, and gain the ability to control nature itself, in ways you had never imagined (Part if the Everfree Legacy).

3075882
Following further along the Everfree Legacy will slow reaction times and make you an easy target for, say, the Elements of Harmony. Seek the brimstone scent that promises treasure and flame, but only after that zebra you tame. Make her yours, and you shall see, you shall thrive in the Everfree.


(Reliance on any one mutation or power threatens to overwhelm the host with the downsides of said mutation. Balance nature with flame, temper with additional nature later when the Flame settels.)

[Very enjoyable chapter! I think the idea of splitting the clop and non-clop versions is a good idea, too]

3075317
While holding her tight, take your time and lick her ear. Just slightly, just once. Make sure she does not wake.

Then, whisper to her how much you like her- but more importantly, whisper to her how much she likes you. How she wants to be yours. Why else did she tell you about her people's "herds"? She wants to be yours at least as much as you want her to be yours, maybe even more! So quietly whisper to her sleeping form how fulfilling her life would be under you, as your... well, that depends on how she conducts herself, eh? Perhaps as your mate, but if she turns out to be truly subservient, slavish even, you need to call her something else, of course.

And do not worry that you're doing anything to her besides holding her and whispering. Princess Luna is the only one who can change ponies in their dreams; you are merely voicing your thoughts. Harmless.

(That's not the case, of course. Direct contact with his enchanted tongue should markedly increase the effect, hence the licking of Zecora's ear; plus, her sleep-induced vulnerability will make any suggestion take root deeply in her defenseless mind. He will condition her to see him as her master, but it will take a little time.
And if he is to ever see the amulet, she needs to see him that way. I doubt Zecora would hand as dangerous an artifact as this even to a loved one- that is, if she hasn't gotten rid of it in a permanent fashion already.)

3075882
In many ways, Zecora and the Everfree Forest are one. You want her... maybe you want it as well? It is your home for the time being. Why not learn about it, about its wonders and dangers?

Think about it: nopony besides Zecora lives here, and nopony knows much about it. What if... what if you were the first to truly explore it? You could finally be somepony! No homeless bum anymore, but an esteemed explorer, greater even than Daring Do! You would be famous, rich, loved!

So use your new sense of smell to learn Zecora's craft as well as to understand the Everfree. Remember, you'll be somepony- you'll finally be somepony...

(I noticed we are trying to move him too fast. He's not a fighter- not yet. He has not interest in fighting. We need to slow down, and build him up first; and to do that, he needs an incentive that works for him. Cue my attempt to give him a chance to stroke his ego. Hardly anypony wants to fight, but everypony wants to be famous, especially one that's known only rock bottom his entire life.
So, in the guise of doing Equestria good, let him unlock the resources of the Everfree before doing something as dangerous as taking on a full-grown dragon. The dragon can wait. Let him master the forest as he masters Zecora: my vote is for the Everfree Legacy.)

3076893
(It seems I have been outvoted. Just keep in mind that battle is inevetible and that strengthening his connection to nature will increase his sluggishness and lethargy as well as reduce his tolerance to flame and ice...the very elements of our benefactors)

The dragon can wait, seek the power the Everfree whispers of.

(P.S. The amulet is in the box he was staring at at the start of the chapter)

3077012
(Ah, so it is. Good.

I understand your worries; however, moving him away from their sphere of influence will give us an edge should Luna or Celestia suspect their involvement. Among other reasons, of course...)

3077075
(Be careful friend, nature tends to have a purifying influence on those it claims, just look at Fluttershy, connected at a deeper level to the creatures of nature and as pure and innocent as can be. And we all know the saying about too much of a good thing...)

I still expect you to seek the dragon when the time is right...something to balance out the abundance of green that is infusing into your being.

Nomad

3077108
Who knows, maybe you'll even eventually manage a feat as awesome as defeating a full-fledged dragon!

(Agreed. The clash with the dragon is merely postponed. He will be dealt with the time is right.)

Comment posted by Word Bearer deleted Aug 23rd, 2013

A fine conquest pony, but your work is not done yet. The town outside of the Everfree, it is not ready for you yet. Remember, the ponies of that place nearly cast out your mate in their superstition and mistrust, something tells me they would give you a smilar welcome. Instead, lets go pick some flowers for your new mate...how about those bright blue ones over there?

(To Cryon)

(I require a moment of your time, and a touch of your power. The flowers I send the pawn towards are Poison Joke, the very flowers that Discord crafted all those years ago. At full health, these Discordian blooms are still magical enough to inconvenience the host. A light touch of frost should weaken them enough so that he will absorb the latent chaos magic in the blooms without ill effect. Seeing as this is CHAOS magic, I'm not quite sure what absorbing it will do...it could be anything from the ability to teleport, to the ability to form clouds of cotton candy to ride/fly on.)

(With Respect,)
(Nomad)

Comment posted by MagusNeon deleted Oct 16th, 2013

Young pawn go back into the castle ruin you'll find a antechamber underneath the throne within that antechamber is a tome a very old tome now what that tome contains is the secrets to summoning spirits now then ask your slave to go into the nearest village and find a book that shows how to forge weapons. With the knowledge forge a sword and then imbue the sword with an enraged and insane windigo.

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