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February Write Off254 stories ·36 members

Whiteout

The mane six travel to a ski lodge for Twilight's birthday, but ponies soon start disappearing. As the blizzard rages outside, she must discover who, or what, is behind it all.

Chapters (2)

Comments ( 4 )

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PresentPerfect

Author Interviewer

PresentPerfect #1 · Feb 27th, 2012 · · · Part I ·

Augh, that ending was a real letdown. Worst birthday party ever. :| Seriously, if I was Twilight, I'd hate them all forever.

That said, this was a pretty enjoyable read and I think it would benefit from being rewritten as a long-form chaptered fic to keep up the suspense and atmosphere. I just... I wish that had been a real monster, seriously. That was horrible, what they did.

peppermint owl

peppermint owl #2 · Mar 6th, 2012 · · · Part I ·

267395
Thanks for the feedback! And I agree, I ended up being unsatisfied with the ending, but I ran out of time and had to submit it as it was. The pacing was also too fast, but I learned a lot from trying to make a story in one weekend. You can expect a major rewrite soon.

PresentPerfect

Author Interviewer