Twilight's life takes on a different tint when she fails to pass her entrance exam for Celestia's School. As it turns out, there are other ways to serve her princess and country.
It's back! Wow, over a year... It took me a short bit to refresh my memory. :)
Hm. And she has a hangover anyway.
Interesting choice of names for Twilight's parents.
"a peeled orange over to her and took" "to herself"?
Ooh, and you've given Canterlot an internal railway system! :D ...And yes, I'm aware that it's a bit odd to find that so exciting.
And a fleet of military hot air rigids? Interesting! Magical heating, I suppose?
"and even a few old canons" "cannons"
"realized her tern to get checked" "turn"
"There was another cue, which " "queue"
I don't know if you want this sort of feedback, but it wasn't clear to me at first that there were more than three unicorns, counting Twilight, taking the test. It was a bit confusing. Unless I'm missing something, of course; if so, sorry.
"For just a moment Twilight thought the unicorn’s voice had changed." Hm... Interesting... Could be nothing, of course, just an auditory hallucination from the extreme conditions, but...
A very good chapter, I think. Nice to see this back.
[reads author's note] Ah, and there's the reason, a good one, for the delay. :)
"Also, Yesterday is Today is being worked on as well." Wow! Might have to fully reread that one when the next chapter comes out.
The end of the chapter was interesting. Was it Twilight's imagination, or something else? When did the evaluating doctor mention Twilight's name to the "Magister"? Or is someone interested in doing a little follow-up?
Also, Yesterday is Today is being worked on as well.
Yes squared!
Though the city hosted the largest zeppelin squadron in Equestria, not everything in the sprawling complex was related to flying those giant hot air airships.
If Equestria=North America you should have a surplus of helium for Zeppelins. (Helium that is now being sold out at dumping prices from US national reserves...)
5607408 "If Equestria=North America you should have a surplus of helium for Zeppelins. (Helium that is now being sold out at dumping prices from US national reserves...)" Well, that depends on a variety of things, but I think the current system, as I understand it, is actually a neat idea. The higher you can get the temperature of the lifting gas, the lower you can get its density; heat it up enough, and can get more lift from hot air than ambient temperature helium, or even hydrogen. You could, of course, get even better performance from hot helium or hydrogen, but air is everywhere. You can vent as much as you like and take on more in midair over wilderness; filling the ships is cheaper than even a simple chemical hydrogen plant. Of course, there are drawbacks; there are reasons why, on Earth, the most I remember being built with hot air are small nonrigids. First, you have to have a way to get the air sufficiently hot and keep it that hot, without posing too great a risk. We don't have that, but presumably these ponies do with some sort of magical system. Secondly, for any active ship, it has to be kept hot, unless you overbuild the ships. Rigids aren't meant to take their own weight, and it's a somewhat lengthy process, IIRC, putting them into or removing them from storage with their gasbags empty. Not good for military ships. Equestria could solve that, though, either by magically overbuilding the ships (enchanted girders that are stronger but not heavier and the like) or by magically keeping the air at some minimum temperature. Which one would be optimal would depend, I think, on the exact natures of the two magics, but they appear to have at least some solution making these viable. edit: Is there a pony Count Zeppelin in this universe, by the way? I'm wondering where the name came from.
Awesome to see this isn't a deadfic. When I first found it and saw the timestamps on the comments I got worried that yet another fic that explores this AU concept had been given a promising start only to forego any updates past that.
I really love the way you've built up Twi's alternate character in this. The relationships between her and her family have a lot of nice depth to them.
5746610 5746767 Yeah, basically this. A story with a similar premise came out and was added to one of the groups I'm in, and this was in the related stories bar. Really glad I found this fic, though.
Twilight struggled with her duffle bag when she realized hertern (turn) to get checked was coming up. She only held up the line a moment while she fished out the papers she’d been given by her ROTC commander, Coalmane, to get her in. The guard that she flashed them at grunted and pointed with his hoof at a sign hanging on a column a few feet away.
9232488 Except for the almighty power of friendship. Because no matter how determined those villains wanted to defeat Equestria, one big rainbow lazer and they were done for.
Twilight struggled with her duffle bag when she realized her tern (turn) to get checked was coming up. She only held up the line a moment while she fished out the papers she’d been given by her ROTC commander, Coalmane, to get her in. The guard that she flashed them at grunted and pointed with his hoof at a sign hanging on a column a few feet away.
Twilight ended the debate succulently (succinctly) when her bag thudded down next to the line. Unlike the other two, hers was clearly an ROTC bag that held her spare uniforms, training armor, and very little civilian clothes. Even though she was a small mare, Twilight was larger in the legs and barrel than even the administration guard.
Iron Cross stepped up to the struggling mare and helped her up. Twilight noticed that he took the ball from her without much effort. His face was much kinder, especially when the unicorn tried to take the ball back. “You passed. To answer the question earlier, ninety percent of jobs only require you pass the first ring. After your test scores are figured, you (you'll) get your job pool.” He turned to the group and raised an eyebrow. “Well? Next.”
10135031 So, uh, besides no changes to previous chapters, you kept switching back and forth between Velvet and Galaxy. Confused me a few times. Interesting story though.
“I scheduled you twenty minutes to get washed up and completely sober before your mother comes to find you,” Light said, stepping toward the bathroom door. “Galaxy has a sixth sense for these kinds of things, so you should get it all out of your system before your brother’s distraction runs its course.”
“Six sharp ,” Galaxy provided. The matron of the house looked like a bird whose feathers had been thoroughly ruffled and the edge in her voice made both Shining and Cadence go rigid.
They both nodded, but Twilight could tell that her words had shifted the mood. Galaxy was still staring intently at her pancakes. Subtly, Light put his hoof on her leg and he mare sucked in a long breath of air through her nostrils.
They both nodded, but Twilight could tell that her words had shifted the mood. Galaxy was still staring intently at her pancakes. Subtly, Light put his hoof on her leg and he mare sucked in a long breath of air through her nostrils.
A train whistle in the distance distracted everyone. The morning train wasn’t running yet, but its arrival was rapidly approaching. Twilight Velvet leaned into her husband to bury a sniffle in his neck and Twilight’s body went stiff. If Galaxy begged her not to join, could she say no? If her entire family was against her joining the Guard then could she really go off anyway? Could she be Shining Armor if it came down to it, walking away from everything she’d ever known?
Galaxy’s hooves came up and Twilight felt the hairs of her back stand up. Was this it? Was this where they would spring it on her? Was this —
“I’ve taken you for granted,” Galaxy murmured. “I always thought that you would be there, that you’d always be our little filly, sitting around the library with your nose in a book. Before I knew it you were grown. How did I never see it before today?”
Twilight Velvet and Night Light recognized the noise as well. Galaxy wiped her eyes with the back of her hoof and took a shaky step back from Twilight. “I’m sorry if I messed up your mane,” she said, her voice somewhere between a laugh and a sob.
Galaxy rubbed her muzzle, getting the rest of her sniffles out. “I swear , Shining, that if you get her into any trouble I’ll—”
This is every mention of Galaxy (including a couple paragraphs where you used both) I could find in chapter 4. Unless this is the name you are going with and Velvet is the typo. In which case, whoops.
I'm so glad this isn't dead. Go Twily, go!
Stupid Princess school.
A veteran takes first post.
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Navy boy, eh? I suppose that's not too bad.
It's back!
Dammit, I'm hooked now. Thanks a lot jerk.
Awesome story! Kind of sad now that there aren't any more chapters to read. (At least for awhile) =)
Soooo yeah, so happy this was updated, love it and so looking forward to more!
Do we have to wait a year for the next chapter? :v
It's back! Wow, over a year... It took me a short bit to refresh my memory. :)
Hm. And she has a hangover anyway.
Interesting choice of names for Twilight's parents.
"a peeled orange over to her and took"
"to herself"?
Ooh, and you've given Canterlot an internal railway system! :D
...And yes, I'm aware that it's a bit odd to find that so exciting.
And a fleet of military hot air rigids? Interesting! Magical heating, I suppose?
"and even a few old canons"
"cannons"
"realized her tern to get checked"
"turn"
"There was another cue, which "
"queue"
I don't know if you want this sort of feedback, but it wasn't clear to me at first that there were more than three unicorns, counting Twilight, taking the test. It was a bit confusing. Unless I'm missing something, of course; if so, sorry.
"For just a moment Twilight thought the unicorn’s voice had changed."
Hm... Interesting... Could be nothing, of course, just an auditory hallucination from the extreme conditions, but...
A very good chapter, I think. Nice to see this back.
[reads author's note]
Ah, and there's the reason, a good one, for the delay. :)
"Also, Yesterday is Today is being worked on as well."
Wow! Might have to fully reread that one when the next chapter comes out.
Thank you for writing.
Take THAT, sonic rainboom
5606253 Also, there's
I suspect the author meant "succinctly".
The end of the chapter was interesting. Was it Twilight's imagination, or something else? When did the evaluating doctor mention Twilight's name to the "Magister"? Or is someone interested in doing a little follow-up?
An update! Yes!
Yes squared!
If Equestria=North America you should have a surplus of helium for Zeppelins. (Helium that is now being sold out at dumping prices from US national reserves...)
5607408
"If Equestria=North America you should have a surplus of helium for Zeppelins. (Helium that is now being sold out at dumping prices from US national reserves...)"
Well, that depends on a variety of things, but I think the current system, as I understand it, is actually a neat idea. The higher you can get the temperature of the lifting gas, the lower you can get its density; heat it up enough, and can get more lift from hot air than ambient temperature helium, or even hydrogen. You could, of course, get even better performance from hot helium or hydrogen, but air is everywhere. You can vent as much as you like and take on more in midair over wilderness; filling the ships is cheaper than even a simple chemical hydrogen plant.
Of course, there are drawbacks; there are reasons why, on Earth, the most I remember being built with hot air are small nonrigids. First, you have to have a way to get the air sufficiently hot and keep it that hot, without posing too great a risk. We don't have that, but presumably these ponies do with some sort of magical system. Secondly, for any active ship, it has to be kept hot, unless you overbuild the ships. Rigids aren't meant to take their own weight, and it's a somewhat lengthy process, IIRC, putting them into or removing them from storage with their gasbags empty. Not good for military ships. Equestria could solve that, though, either by magically overbuilding the ships (enchanted girders that are stronger but not heavier and the like) or by magically keeping the air at some minimum temperature. Which one would be optimal would depend, I think, on the exact natures of the two magics, but they appear to have at least some solution making these viable.
edit: Is there a pony Count Zeppelin in this universe, by the way? I'm wondering where the name came from.
Awesome, I have been waiting for this to update. Great chapter.
Twilight Sparkle. Unicorn goon.
Awesome to see this isn't a deadfic. When I first found it and saw the timestamps on the comments I got worried that yet another fic that explores this AU concept had been given a promising start only to forego any updates past that.
I really love the way you've built up Twi's alternate character in this. The relationships between her and her family have a lot of nice depth to them.
5743447
5742939
Did this get linked somewhere over the last few days? There have been a lot of favorites and views so I'm curious.
Not that I'm complaining!
5746610 There was a fairly recent "Twilight Sparkle Royal Guard" fic that came out. So your story would have been in the sidebar.
5746767
Oh wow, didn't know that was a feature. Link to the story?
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/195530/my-little-guardsmare-bad-moon-rising
5746610
5746767
Yeah, basically this. A story with a similar premise came out and was added to one of the groups I'm in, and this was in the related stories bar. Really glad I found this fic, though.
This is the first ponyfic I've read in like a year such a good chapter
What branch are u. Whatis ur mos and what bass did u train at. Also its nice to find a fellow military brony on here.
Really clever sequence! Fantastic stuff.
I'm so proud of Twilight~ Good going kid! I'm proud of her determination!
Nice job on this! :ya:
Will. Beneath everything else in magic, there is Will. A mage that possesses Will can accept no limits. And no limit shall ever hold them.
Chapter 4
9232488
Except for the almighty power of friendship. Because no matter how determined those villains wanted to defeat Equestria, one big rainbow lazer and they were done for.
Who are Selenic Shine and Galaxy Glimmer?
10134961
Twilight's parents. Author stated earlier that this project was started before they had canon names
10134961
Sorry, sorry. I thought I edited all the chapters. I'll hit this one for corrections when I get home.
But yeah, this was out before they had canon names.
10135031
So, uh, besides no changes to previous chapters, you kept switching back and forth between Velvet and Galaxy. Confused me a few times. Interesting story though.
10245360
If you could point out those to me, I would appreciate it. I keep thinking I've found them all.
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This is every mention of Galaxy (including a couple paragraphs where you used both) I could find in chapter 4. Unless this is the name you are going with and Velvet is the typo. In which case, whoops.
10245660
Bless you, good Sirah. I wrote all of this back in 2015, when we didn't have an official name for Twilight's parents.
Excellent world building in this chapter. Kudos.