• Published 30th Jul 2013
  • 5,600 Views, 682 Comments

Trixie vs. Equestria - PaulAsaran



Oh look, Trixie's life has come crashing down. Again. Is there any way she can get out of her cycle of success and failure? A certain Princess of the Night might have the answer, but first Trixie must catch her attention.

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A Dash of Complexity

Trixie sat in the carriage, head bowed and a bitter frown on her lips. She was in a lot of pain. Her head was pounding, her legs cried out whenever she tried to move them and it felt as if there were daggers in her lungs. Yet she welcomed the hurt. It allowed her to focus her mind, to think beyond the gripping sadness and on to more pressing matters.

The carriage rocked. She glanced to see Amethyst climbing on next to her. Her friend sat and stared ahead, lips set in a tight frown and eyes hard. Trixie worked her sore jaw for a moment before speaking up.

“Trixie thought you were going to meet that stallion.”

Amethyst’s face twisted in a small battle of emotions, but ultimately a smile came to her lips. She tried to hide it with a hoof, but the amusement in her eyes betrayed her. “N-no, I think I’ll back out. After tonight I doubt he’s in the mood, especially for somepony associated with you. He really looked like he could buck, too, so thanks for raining on my parade, Trix.”

Trixie didn’t smile. She gazed forward over the pegasus drivers and into the darkness of the surrounding apple trees. “Where’s Luna?”

Amethyst glanced at her with a grin. “Healing Applejack. Better watch out, leaving those two alone together. You might lose your pretty princess.”

Trixie raised a hoof threateningly. “Trixie spent the past hour getting beaten and humiliated and just lost something very important to her. Now is not the time to tempt me.”

“Gotcha.”

Trixie stared at the hoof on her muzzle with crossed eyes. For a brief moment she thought she might lash out… but then her anger deflated and her body sagged. “What am I going to do now, Ammy?”

Amethyst’s hoof remained set on Trixie’s muzzle for a few seconds, but her smile had faded. For the first time in ages, she wore an expression of genuine concern for her friend. Slowly, she pulled her hoof away and sighed. “I don’t know, Trix. What do you want to do?”

Trixie stared at her hooves for several long seconds, trying to think of an answer. In the end she merely turned forward in the seat, questions and worries fighting for dominance in her mind.

Amethyst wrapped a hoof around Trixie’s shoulder. “Listen, I know I haven’t been the best of friends, but I want you to know something. Watching you fight tonight, seeing how you handled Applejack... I was wowed. You really are something else, Trix. When this whole thing started I thought you wouldn’t last past the first fight. Hell, I didn’t think there’d be a first fight.”

“Thanks for the confidence.” Trixie's attempt at sarcasm was ruined by the misery in her voice.

Amethyst ignored the comment. “But ya know what really impressed me? When you let Applejack go. You let her family save that barn. You spared them all, Trix. I don’t think I’d have been able to do that. I was humbled, and I think she felt the same way.”

Trixie wished she could say that her friend’s words made her feel better. She would have lied if she could. Instead she just felt empty. She leaned forward to rest her chin on the front of the carriage, a despondent sigh slipping through her lips.

Amethyst was silent for several seconds, but finally muttered a grumpy, “Well, I tried.”

Minutes passed in silence. Trixie wished they could leave already; her mind was running through so many sad thoughts that she just wanted to sleep and forget. That wouldn’t happen for a while, though, as she was growing more and more accustomed to Luna’s nocturnal habits. Still, if she could just talk to Luna about everything, figure it all out...

As if the thought were a summons, Luna appeared from the darkness. Trixie watched her, a sense of contempt growing from within. Luna wore a sad frown, her eyes faded in thought, but they cleared as she approached the carriage. Trixie moved aside to the center of the vehicle, letting the princess in next to her. At Luna’s command the drivers lifted off, bringing them high into the starry night sky.

Luna studied Trixie, who returned her attention with a scowl. The princess reached a hoof up to lift Trixie’s chin and examined her face. “Here,” she whispered, lowering her head so their horns touched.

Trixie was tempted to jerk away, but before she could act on the impulse she felt that familiar warming sensation. It eased her mental tension even as the pain in her body began to lessen. She smiled and worked her shoulders; she just felt so incredibly good at that moment. As if she could do anything.

The touch ended, taking with it the pleasurable heat. Trixie’s mood gradually deteriorated at its loss and she gazed up at Luna with sad eyes. “Thanks…”

Luna nodded serenely before turning to face forward, eyes lost in thought once more.

Trixie wanted to talk, to ask the questions that were swirling around her head. Yet somehow she felt the topic was meant to be private, and Amethyst was still there. So she sat back and tried to quiet her mind. She cast her eyes up to the heavens, where thousands of stars twinkled brightly.

It abruptly dawned upon her just how beautiful the night sky was. She’d never been able to see it at this height. The view was nothing short of spectacular. Her eyes traced some of the constellations, bouncing from star to star. How much nicer the starry sky was compared to the harsh sunlight. She abruptly wished she were on a grassy hill, snug under her old blanket and gazing in the lull before sleep.

The thought almost returned her to tears.


Trixie had spent much of the trip in a dull haze, having to be jostled into awareness by Amethyst once they’d landed in the Canterlot gardens. Amethyst remained in the carriage at first while Luna and Trixie stepped out, but the princess gestured for her to follow. “I had Nye arrange a suite for you in the castle’s Nocturnal Wing,” she explained. “Since you seem interested in following your friend’s progress, I see no reason to deny you the opportunity to watch.”

“Alright!”

Amethyst blinked, blushed and coughed self-consciously. “I mean, thank you, princess. I appreciate the thought.” Luna smiled at her enthusiasm. “I think I’ll go check my digs... er, suite out right now. I’m not used to staying up this late, anyway.”

Trixie watched her friend leave, noting how she was trying not to sprint. She’d have smiled if there weren’t important thoughts swimming through her mind once again.

She noted that Luna was starting to leave. “Princess, wait.”

Luna paused, her head turning to Trixie. There was clear worry in her eyes, but Trixie only felt anger. “You promised Trixie that you’d tell her things after the second fight. She has questions.”

Luna glanced away, her eyes closing as she sucked in a deep breath. “Yes… I did promise that.” She turned to face Trixie properly, though there was hesitancy in her eyes. “You may ask, but let me remind you that there are still certain things I will not explain.”

Trixie pursed her lips at that, but decided there was nothing for it but to ask. “What Applejack said about your relationship with her. How much of that was true?”

Luna paused, but her eyes remained locked with Trixie’s. “All of it.”

A direct answer wasn’t at all what Trixie had expected. Her hackles rose as she wondered about the potential consequences. “Why would you ruin a pony’s life in such a manner? Is that the kind of treatment Trixie can expect?”

Luna’s head drooped and her ears flattened. She averted her eyes to think on her answer. Finally she sat in the grass and gestured for Trixie to do the same. “Perhaps I should tell you about my relationship with Applejack.”

Trixie scrutinized Luna, but finally sat. “Trixie would appreciate that.”

Luna closed her eyes and paused to collect her thoughts. “I met Applejack two months after leaving Rarity. I had rescued her sister from a rather serious nightmare and she wanted to thank me personally. I… admit to having had an attraction to her.” She bowed her head. “After the posh and perfectionist manner of Rarity, Applejack seemed a refreshing change of pace. But four months later her grandmother died – I subsequently ended the relationship.”

Trixie waited for the story to continue, but Luna remained silent. “Wait, is that it?”

Luna nodded. “There’s nothing else to tell.”

“Do not lie to Trixie!” She jumped to her hooves and posed in challenge to Luna’s words. “Why did you break up with her? Why weren’t you there? Why did you give her land to those unicorns?”

Luna sighed and turned her head away. “Trixie, there was a time when I was… well, not a very good princess. I’m not proud of what I was, and I would do anything to change it. Many ponies were hurt because of my manner.”

Trixie scowled. “What about Rarity? Did you ruin things for her, too?”

Luna couldn’t meet her eye. “Rarity offered me everything she possibly could, and even some things she couldn’t. I took it all and gave her nothing in return.”

Trixie gaped. “Why are these ponies even fighting for you?”

Now Luna did meet her eye. The sorrow reflected in her expression caught Trixie off guard. “Because they have no choice. They are caught in a vortex of emotions, Trixie – and should you handle this situation incorrectly, you will be just as they are.”

Trixie turned away from the princess. “No wonder they consider Nightmare Moon evil. Trixie wants nothing more to do with this!”

“No.” Luna’s voice became firm. “I told you before; once you begin there is no going back. Even if you leave Canterlot, the remaining four ponies will seek you out.”

“Trixie does not care!” She shot the Princess a hateful scowl. “They can chase after me and I’ll fight, but Trixie refuses to do it for your sake.”

“That might even be for the better,” Luna admitted, “though I strongly urge you to remain at the castle. You can complete the fights properly and not have to be chased.”

“Assuming I even survive the fights.”

“I am sorry, but I did try to warn you.”

Trixie rubbed her head with both hooves. “Yes, Trixie supposes you did.” She turned back to Luna, her mind a torrent of emotions. Despair for what she’d lost; anger at Luna for her horrid history; annoyance at herself for getting caught up in all of it in the first place. “Trixie will stay, but she is not fighting for you.”

Luna nodded. “So be it. I know you must think me a terrible pony, but please understand that I never wanted you to get hurt.”

Trixie sat back to cross her legs and study the princess, brow furrowed. “Trixie wishes she could believe you.”

Luna flinched. She considered Trixie for a moment, opened her mouth to speak… then raised her head as if noticing a change in the air. Her eyes focused on something over Trixie’s shoulder, but when Trixie turned to take a look she saw nothing. “What are you—”

“I think you need to go for a walk,” Luna declared. “It will be good for you, perhaps clear your head.”

Trixie glowered. “Trixie would rather just go to her room.”

“No, Trixie.” Luna came forward to set both hooves on her shoulders. Her eyes locked with Trixie’s, full of some intense and unfathomable meaning. “You really should go for a walk in the garden. Visit the Statue of the Unknown Princess. It’s one of the more serene places in the area.”

Then she turned away and made for the castle. “I have work to do. I will see you tomorrow evening, if I can.”

“Wha—? Wait! Trixie has more questions!”

Luna didn’t stop. “You’ll have your answers, if you are patient. Trust me.”

She reared back to shout, “Trixie does not!” No matter; Luna was gone.

Trixie glared after her for several seconds. She was so aggravated, and the feeling was getting worse with every passing minute! Everywhere she turned there were secrets. Why would nopony be upfront about anything anymore?

She strongly considered ignoring Luna’s blatant hint and heading for her room in the castle. She was in no mood for any more games, especially after the hell she’d already been through this night. For a tender second she thought of her wagon, now just a pile of cinders being swept out as trash. Her chest went tight at the image… but she shook off the moment of weakness. It was gone along with her old life. She had to move forward. It was all she could do: keep moving and pray there would be a light at the end of this twisting, curving tunnel.

With a frustrated groan she turned and made her way deeper into the gardens. She had no idea where the Statue of the Unknown Princess was, but at the moment she didn’t care. As long as she was walking. As long as it felt as though she was doing something. Otherwise she’d mope, and she would not do that.

The gardens were surprisingly large. Surprisingly empty too. Weren’t there supposed to be animals here? The flora was beautiful, but she seemed to recall stories that the Royal Garden was also a veritable petting zoo. Why was it so quiet? What happened to the birds, the creatures? Yet the silence was comforting. After the noise and laughter of Sweet Apple Acres, peace and quiet was a welcome change of pace.

Perhaps Luna was right. Maybe she did need a good walk in the garden to clear her head.

She found the statue near a small pond. After hearing Nye talk about it, she was a little disappointed. It was carved entirely of marble and featured an alicorn princess staring to the North. At first the statue was very impressive… until Trixie caught sight of the face. Turned out there was no face – it had broken off. Judging by the wear on the stone, it had been like that for a very long time. It was almost creepy, the way the head ended just before the ears.

Trixie sat and stared up at the statue for a long time. Everypony knew the story of the princess who had appeared to help defeat Discord, only to disappear shortly after. No name, no existing descriptions. Not even a cutie mark. Seeing her with no face struck Trixie as rather insulting to a pony who’d done so much so quickly.

“Interesting sight, isn’t it?”

Trixie let out a yelp and nearly fell in her rushed turn. Standing right next to her was a mottled-brown unicorn with a black mane, wearing a black vest to match. He stared up at the statue’s face with solemn rosewood eyes, seeming not to notice Trixie’s wild reaction.

She recovered and struck a confident pose. “Where did you come from?”

He glanced at her with a superior, indifferent expression on his face. “Around. I’m always around.”

She raised an eyebrow, uncomfortable with both his answer and his manner. “Who are you?”

“Fine Crime.” After a couple seconds he glanced at her as if expecting some sort of response. When she failed to give one he asked, “You don’t know me, do you?”

“Why would Trixie know you?” But she realized that she’d seen him before even as the words left her mouth – he’d been talking to Celestia just before the fight with Rarity.

He turned to her, a slight smile on his lips. “Your friend Amethyst knew of me. Scared to death of me, too.”

“Pardon Trixie if she hurt your ego,” she countered with a dark undertone.

At that his smile became a mocking smirk. “I would think you know all about having an ego.”

Trixie’s eyes flared and her lips pulled back to show her teeth. “Trixie does not have an ego!”

“A speech impediment, then.”

She let out a brutal snarl and lunged forward, thrusting her horn so it was just barely touching his throat. “Tonight is the wrong night to piss me off!”

His smirk dropped instantly, though clearly not from fear. He stared at her with cold, judging eyes that hardly acknowledged her horn at his neck. “And to think, when first I saw you I thought you were a nopony. I was surprised when you beat Rarity, but this latest victory impresses me.”

She didn’t know why he knew so much, but she didn’t like it. She kept her horn leveled and glowing as she repeated, “Who are you?”

He maintained his dark gaze for several long seconds before answering. “I am Fine Crime, the Mane Archon. Celestia’s dark hoof.”

The glow of Trixie’s horn fizzled out with a tiny poof as her blood ran cold. She didn’t know his name, but she knew his job title. She stepped back from him, eyes darting about the gardens for dangers… but they were alone. Or at least she thought they were alone. “W-what do you want from Trixie?”

“Nothing, as far as you know.” He turned to look up at the statue’s broken face once more. “Just out for a casual stroll.”

She didn’t believe a word of it. The leader of the Dark Archons, right before her eyes! Either he was here to kill or… or what else? “T-Trixie has been through a l-lot tonight.” She had to fight to keep her voice as steady as possible. “She’s prepared to deal with you!”

He didn’t look at her, only kept his eyes on the statue. “Believe me, Trixie Lulamoon, I know exactly what you’ve been through tonight. Rest assured that I am not here to hurt you. I just wanted to say a few words.”

“Well you’ve said them,” she declared, adding in a hopeful voice, “so you’ll be on your way now, right?”

He seemed to grow a little tense. “It’s not that simple. Nothing ever is. I find myself in a terrible situation, but I believe you might provide a solution.”

She didn’t want anything to do with it! But she didn’t dare bolt. She wasn’t sure she’d make it out of the gardens alive if she did. “I d-don’t think I could help.”

He ignored her. “The Archons serve Celestia; I am bound by honor and magic, and can tell her no lies. And yet my personal loyalties lie only with Luna, with whom I have grown very close. So you see, I must find a way to properly divide my activities between them and push both agendas.”

Trixie stared at him for a moment, but he never looked her way. “Why are you telling this to Trixie?”

“To give you a little insight,” he replied, “and to make it clear that Luna has more allies than just that chubby caretaker next door to you.”

She hesitated, but thought she understood his meaning. “So… an ally of Luna is an ally of Trixie?”

“Oh, I wouldn’t call myself your ally.” His cryptic nature was really starting to get under her coat. “I’m just drawing the battle lines.”

She scratched her head. “Then you mean there is a political rivalry between the princesses?”

“They merely have agendas. Those agendas don’t always coincide with one another.” She wished he would stop staring at the damn statue! “My incredibly challenging task is to find a way to meet both agendas at once. To be frank, I’m not sure it’s possible.”

She sat and tried to think. She felt like there was a lot of information being given to her right now, but his strange delivery method made it impossible to decipher! “Well… what… are you wanting Trixie to do?”

At last he turned to her, a slight smile on his lips. “I wouldn’t dare ask Trixie to do anything.”

She let out a frustrated shout, throwing her hooves in the air. “Why won’t anypony speak to Trixie plainly? Is it too much to ask for a little directness?”

He raised an eyebrow and gestured to himself. “Excuse me. Archons. Espionage organization. We don’t do direct.”

“Well somepony needs to!” She rubbed her face with both hooves. “Trixie is sick and tired of having to figure things out.”

“I can’t help you there,” he told her, voice apologetic. “I’m literally incapable of telling you the things you’d like me to.” He studied her face. “There is one piece of information I can give you, direct and clear as a whistle: your third opponent will arrive the morning after tomorrow.”

Trixie blinked, caught off guard by this information. “Really? You mean he’s coming here?”

He nodded. “It takes time to get here, but Luna’s third fling is on the way to Canterlot right now. You will need to be ready.”

She considered this for a few seconds. Be ready how? “I don’t suppose you can give Trixie anymore information on this opponent?”

He set a hoof to her chest for emphasis. “Only this: make sure you know who you are fighting for. It’s the only way to really win.”

She glowered and knocked his hoof away. “Thanks, that’s really going to help Trixie.”

His expression became stern. “Don’t dismiss this. Even if you win the fight, it will be for nothing if you aren’t certain of yourself and what you are fighting for. Get it right, Trixie.”

She scowled. “Trixie will remember your words, for what good they probably won’t do her.”

At that he smiled, his expression becoming soft. “Don’t be so negative. You should relax, enjoy the scenery.” He nodded to the statue. “Take a look at this masterpiece, for instance. Truly it is a beauty.”

Trixie facehoofed. “Now you wish to discuss aesthetics with Trixie? She’s going to bed.”

“No, really.” He stepped past her. “Check her hooves. The rest of the statue is okay, but her hooves are marvelous! Go ahead, take a close look.”

She watched him as he cast a charming grin her way, then glanced at the statue. The hooves? What was so interesting about hooves?

She tried to look back at him, but was startled to find herself alone. How had he disappeared so quickly? She turned a full circle, but she was now the only pony in the vicinity. It made her feel nervous, and she was tempted to leave the garden immediately.

But she resisted that urge. For some reason she didn’t understand, she decided to follow Fine Crime’s advice. Maybe she was just being paranoid, but after all the cryptic messages Fine had left to her she couldn’t help thinking that the hooves line was meant to hint at something.

Feeling rather foolish, she inspected the hooves of the statue. Just as expected, they weren’t anything special to look at. Just stone in the shape of—

He eyes locked on something just barely peering from a crack under one of the hooves. It was hard to believe her hunch had been right, but she had to investigate; she used her magic to gently pull the object out. It was a folded piece of paper. She unfolded it and stared at the page for a few seconds.

Numbers on a table. Strange symbols? What appeared to be a mark of approval from some figure, probably the captain of the guard or somepony similar. What was this? She sat and studied it for a few more seconds, trying to grasp what it all meant. Something involving the Canterlot Spell Library…

A schedule. She gaped in amazement as the understanding finally hit her. She was holding the guard schedule for the wing that held the Spell Library. When shifts rotated, at what points the number of guards would be relaxed, patrol routes – everything she might need to sneak in!

Short of the key. She gazed in the direction that Fine had left. If he hadn’t left her one... did that mean he knew she already had a key of her own? But how could he have known? And why was he giving her this? He was giving it to her, wasn’t he? Surely the paper hadn’t just slipped into such a secure, hidden spot all on its own. Why not give it to her directly?

Then she remembered that Twilight had said Celestia wouldn’t want her in the library. Assuming that Twilight really had visited her and it hadn’t been a dream. Then there was Luna, who’d insisted she come to the statue.

So Fine was giving her the schedule at Luna’s behest, and against Celestia’s wishes. But didn’t he work for Celestia? And he’d said that he couldn’t possibly lie to the princess… so he’d hidden the schedule and never said anything about it. Just so that if she asked him he could honestly deny it?

What a convoluted arrangement. It suddenly dawned upon Trixie just how difficult Fine’s situation was. But more than that, it made her realize how complicated her own problems might be. If the mere act of giving her a piece of paper required such scheming, did that mean there were elaborate political wheels turning around her and her battles? Did somepony have something to gain from her actions?

She let out a groan and rubbed her head; this was giving her a migraine.

Why couldn’t anything be simple anymore?

Author's Note:

There's nothing I love more than wheels within wheels.

I wanted Fine to have a slightly more significant role than I'd originally planned. He's still little more than a background character, but I have something planned for him and needed to have him show up a few times. That way when I do get to the intended scene it's not out of left field.

Am I hinting at intense complexities in the background plot? Maybe, maybe not. I think it's become pretty clear by now that this isn't just a story about Trixie getting into fights. On the other hand, the level of complexity might not be all that deep, and Fine's little scheme could be just a bit of bait to lure people into thinking more than they need to. Is there intense complexity, or isn't there?

Yeah, I love being devious, too.

UPDATE 2/1/2014: This chapter edited by Cerulean Voice!