• Member Since 3rd Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen 6 hours ago

More Dakka


T

Toph Bei Fong never did get her 'life changing field trip with Zuko'. She really should have been careful what she wished for.



Story proof read by; Thardoc

currently undergoing rewrite.

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 125 )

A certain user must see this.

Nice fic by the way.

Soo is this all OC? Or have you simply forgotten to tag characters?

2957907

That's actually a part of the authors note I forgot to add, thanks for the reminder.

To answer your question here though...

No its not just OC's,but I will add characters as they make an appearance and yes I did forget to add Luna.

2957928 I am personally going to wait before reading this. It is on my read later list though, but I'll wait till it has progressed 2 or 3 chapters :pinkiesmile:

2957928 im loving this idea, I will be sure to read it

It's a very very good idea.
But here's a word of advice:
Get an editor.
You seriously need one. I'd be happy to help, but I'm more of a proof reader, but if you can't find an editor, I'd be happy to help.
You'll get a like and a fave from me.
Very very nice. :raritywink:

I am tracking this. This looks very promising. :twilightsmile:

I like this...I feel like Zuko and Luna will bond :moustache:

Interesting idea, but watch out - you have numerous times where you have the wrong word used (there / their), you misspelled Aang's name every time, and you make reference to (misspelled) christmas instead of 'Hearthwarming Eve"

2958793

OK, fixed the Aang spelling, and I will work on the there/ their, when I get 5 minutes.

Would you mind pointing that reference out?

2958895 I just used "there/their" as an example. I noticed similar word replacements here and there as I read, but they're scattered throughout the fic, especially the early part.

2958919

Yea the first thing I will do when I get an editor is rewrite that first bit.

Soon as I saw the title and the group folder it was put in (Crossovers / "TV/Cartoon Series Crossover") I got excited thinking it was going to be a Magic School Bus cross.

What a bummer...

2959345 I know. I was hoping that as well. Somewhat disappointed as I never had any interest in this particular cartoon.

2959345
2959470
Same. Is there a fanfic with that cross? I'd love to read it.

ok I read it, and this is pretty good, definitely a lot of potential.:twilightsmile:

2959523>>2959470

Looked around, but haven't found anything yet.

But you guys have GOT to see this!

2957860 And eight hours later, said user reads.


A few things I would like to point out:
1. Having a proofreader/editor would really help the overall quality of the fic.
1.5. If you need some help, I would gladly offer my services.
2. I can't imagine Zuko saying "a solution gallivants up"… That doesn't really sound like him to me.
3. I thought Toph was perfectly fine with walking on wood. The only time I remember her having a problem was in the Desert, where she was not used to sand, making everything fuzzy for her.
4. I'm looking forward to what's next in store. :raritywink:

Two things:
1:I feel that you should be more succinct with your storytelling.
By this I feel that you went on a bit too much when it came to things like Luna's thoughts about Equestria after her thousand year banishment. It was a great idea and I enjoyed reading it, but it went on too long and wasn't really relevant to the story.
2:You mixed up a few words such as there/their but I'm sure everyone's drilling that stuff into you already.
Either way here's a like and a fave for encouragement and I look forward to seeing where this story goes.

2960606

1) It’s funny how no one reads authors notes…

1.5) and I would welcome them thank you.

2) Yea when I read that over it felt a little off to me…

3) I went over the episode painted lady and a few others and she always seems to be holding onto someone’s arm when she’s walking on wood. Plus she was locked in a wooden Cell with earth under it but couldn’t get out in the runaway. My logic is if she can’t earth bend through it then she can’t see because of it, and that’s where the whole wood = bad thing came from. (I will have to change the mention of the Ba-Sing-Si seeing as that floor was stone not wood. (Can’t believe I let that one slip. :twilightangry2:

2961400

The bit with Luna was actually supposed to be a separate chapter but I had to make it part of the prologue so the story would comply with fimfictions 'must be related to ponies when uploaded' thing...

I really liked the story. With a little bit of editing and this could become really good. There are not nearly enough HiE Avatar crossovers on this site. It's nice to see someone making one. Keep it up:pinkiehappy:

*Sees story*
"Oh wow this is pretty popular, and an avatar crossover? Haven't seen one of those before.
*Reads a bit*
"Heh this is pretty interesting even though I only get half the jokes and have only watched a grand total of three episodes of Avatar."
*reads a bit more*
"Huh, I didn't know Toph was blind..."
"Oh! This must be the "sucked into Equestria bit."
*reads the rest*
"Huh, that is a really fun interpretation of Luna, this story keeps getting better and better."
"He thinks she bolted out of the room like somepony had lit a fire under her flank... because she had to go to the bathroom?...
PFFFT HA HA HA-"
*Dies due to lack of oxygen*

I wrote this comment in this fashion because I was incredibly bored...

By the way I only noticed your spelling mistakes a grand total of twice. One of which you called Aang, Ann... Just thought you should know.

Over all an interesting idea and frankly I can't wait to see what happens on several different fronts of this story.

Soo the next chapter will be contact? :pinkiehappy:

How does this story not have more likes?

*Runs away to find a bulldozer and steal the likes from undeserving clop*

There are trains in the avatar universe that use metal rails Zuko should have noticed instantly what the metal was since the trains are part of the Fire Nation. cdn.mangaeden.com/mangasimg/d4/d4b7d4dad7ca83dfe351a55b7a889a95104467457145301066a11469.jpg

YES! this will be so cool, seriously why aren't there not more genuine avatar the last airbender crosssovers? anyway you make it sound as if you are almost finished with the last chapter, if so, even better! anyway this chapter was great, you seem to have nailed everyone's personalities (which to me is one of the most important factors in a crossover). and I like that you had spike come along, poor guy is always left out in these first contact moments (well he is left out in pretty much anything to be honest)

3356908

I've never read the comics, so if it isn't in the show it probably won’t be in the fic … but I guess I can rationalize this away... princes don't ride on peasant transportation. And he wouldn't have seen one while banished from the fire nation.

Well that first contact could have gone better...

why you put (edited) after each chapter? you can remove them since you never post a chapter before it's edited, :3

So, SO happy I found this story

3503657

The first few chapters were posted before editing remember? I just put it there so any one who had read the non-edited chapters wouldn't assume anything.

Misunderstandings. They suck when you're dealing with stubborn people.

3505499
Why not just put in description (Now with editor) or something? heh.

though if you want to keep it I suppose it isn't really an issue.

3506913

You know, I had that very thought when I first logged on today. Then I started reading Walking nightmares again... :derpytongue2:

Horray! Another chapter

I cannot stress how perfectly you handle the avatar characters. probably my favorite part of this chapter was how you handled Toph's parts, oh and that Iroh scene was awesome too.:twilightsmile:

Ah I was waiting for this. Good job on this chapter, very well written. Hope to see more soon.

I really blame the pony for this. If an unknown creature tries to pay but has the wrong kind of currency you don't throw it in it's face!

I mean, really, what the hell pony?

Nice. I look forward to the next. Hopefully the princesses will see reason and realize they tried to pay.

4019795

Next chapter is already written and is being edited.

Does Zuko perceive Luna as a ponified Azula? This cannot end well. :applejackunsure:

4035269 correction, this can only end in catastrophe.

Luna. you done fuck up now.

how the living arse can you know know that a cornered beast will do nothing BUT retaliate violently as if its life depended on it and you have done nothing but reassure this absolute MONSTER of a beast that it is in fact cornered.

this is EXACTLY what celestia wanted to prevent you twit!

I hope Zuko doesn't view Luna as a ponified Azula, Luna's not the brightest of the bunch due to being, well, isolated for a thousand bloody years.

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