Adventure Awaits (Edited)
Kingdom Hearts of Harmony
By Steel Soul
Adventure Awaits
Green to start music and red to stop music
Canterlot Castle: Celestia's Tower Room, a few days later...
“Luna’s sky is just as beautiful as ever,” Celestia mused as she made her way to her personal balcony that overlooked the Canterlot Gardens, keeping her gaze upon the beautiful night sky above. The stars twinkling brightly above, made the old mare smile ever so gently upon such a sight. “It’s as if she had never left my side…and yet…” She lowered her head. “There’s a tinge of sadness to them, something that even I can feel.”
“Speaking of, just how is your sister, little Luna holding up? Is she integrating with society well?”
Celestia turned to face a mirror not too far away from her, the glistening glowing image depicting a creature unlike any seen in Equestria. Their face, while old in looks, held a presence most akin to Celestia’s own, depicting an ageless wisdom within his wrinkled features, though with the rather large pointy hat upon his head, he did look rather silly.
He moved a hand to adjust a pair of spectacles with circular lenses that sat upon his rather large nose before slowly stroking his flowing white beard as he stared at the white alicorn princess from his side of the looking glass, an expression of both sympathy and worry upon his features. His pointed hat was slightly askew but Celestia expected nothing less from her silly, but wise, old friend.
"She is...doing better then I have expected, Merlin, considering what I had done to her all those years ago..." She looked away from the old creature, doing her best to control a bit of her emotions. She would soon turn back towards him with a smile. "She has made quite a few friends among our staff recently, and she seems to have taken a liking to little Sora. I think she sees a little bit of herself within him."
The old man nodded, smiling softly at the thought of Luna bonding the other ponies in the castle. It wasn't often that Luna allowed others to get close to her, much less show any sort of affection. "Its good to hear that Little Lulu is doing better now. I do wish the best for her...and for you after all." He paused choseing his words carefully, before saying, "Don't beat yourself up too much about the past Tia. What happened has happened."
Celesita would make a non commital huff at that.
The funnily dressed creature sighed as he began to gently stroke his beard, changeing the subject. "Speaking of...how is are resident keyblade wielder?" The bearded fellow asked, cocking his head to the side.
Celestia's gaze fell back to the old man. “Well enough I suppose. I can, however, still feel the darkness trying to sway his heart, but he seems to be doing much better than before he came here. The girls really are having a positive effect on the light within Sora’s heart, as you had believed from the get-go.” She paused. “On that note, the one named Riku is here in Equestria as well. Is him being here you're doing as well?”
The funny man gave her a look of fringed surprise before giving her a wry smile. “You give this old man too much credit, Celestia. All I did was point him in Sora’s direction and he took care of the rest.” He stroked his beard again. “How can one find their light without facing the darkness?” the man said, giving a soft chuckle.
Celestia shook her head. “Just as clever as ever, I see. Wiser words have never been spoken.”
The man narrowed his eyes at the mare, making her shift uncomfortably. “Yes…Good to see you’re listening to me for once.”
Her eyes widened before she coughed, losing her calm composure for only a moment. “A-Anyway, was there something else you needed to know?”
“I’m just checking on the current state of affairs, as it were,” the being chuckled. “This old mind still worries about you, you know.” He stroked his chin thoughtfully “Tell me, do you still feel that other presence you told me about the last time we talked? Has it changed any?”
The princess of the sun sighed before making her way to the mirror. “Yes and yes. Even now I can feel it growing stronger day by day. It’s a wonder that Equestria isn’t covered in darkness by now.” She sighed and looked away. “When the Elements of Harmony returned to their natural form and my sister was saved, I was sure that we would have the means for dealing with the darkness by ourselves, but as you told me, this goes much deeper than I have expected.”
The odd creature within the mirror adjusted his glasses once again. “Hence, why I shot Sora your way from the beginning,” he said with a chuckle. “As much for his sake as for your world’s. Despite his own troubles, he’s not one to allow others to suffer. That’s just the kind of boy he is, you know.”
“All too well, old friend,” Celestia said with a shake of her head, remembering the telling of his past battle with her old student. She was silent for a moment before shaking herself out of her stupor, remembering that that blue-hatted man was staring at her, his head tilted in a peculiar manner. “Listen, my friend, if you ever want to return to Equestria, the door is always open to you.”
The being shook his head. “Sorry, Celestia, but by their account, I am ancient history. Besides… If your newest student, Twilight, ever saw me, I think she might die due to Star-Struck, if your description of her is to be believed. Nice to be recognized in the young generation regardless though.” He laughed heartily before giving the white alicorn a wink. “With the way things are progressing, however, that very student of yours might just find out about me one day. If she’s anything like you described, she’s not going to be content with just knowing there are other worlds out there. She’s going to want proof.”
“And the quickest way for that is to see for herself,” Celestia said as she smiled sadly. “I hate to admit it, but what you say might just be inevitable at this point. She’s not one to sit still and let others do what needs to be done, and for that, I am proud of her, wholly and completely…”
“Buuuut?” the being asked, raising an eyebrow.
“She is meant for great things here in Equestria,” Celestia said softly. “What if she never returns? To her home. To her family. To her destiny…”
The blue-hatted man gave a gentle chuckle. “If she is anything like you told me, I’m sure she will come back home no matter what. Maybe even a bit wiser than before.” The man looked over to his side as a muffled voice hailed him from afar. “Whoops! Seems I am needed! A wizard’s work is never done, I’m afraid,” he mused before smiling at Celestia.
“It’s just as well. I will need to raise the sun again soon anyway,” the white mare said with a smile of her own.
The old wizard nodded before picking up a bag that was nearby. “It’s always a pleasure talking to you, Celly! Call more often, this old coot gets a bit lonely when his best friend doesn’t call him more!”
Celestia clicked her tongue before looking at him from the side. “You’re one to talk, Mr. Wizard,” she mused. “Don’t worry, though; I’ll contact you if something does come up.”
The man smiled before giving her a nod and a wave of his hand. “Looking forward to it.” With that, the magic upon the mirror died, returning to its original purpose of just a looking glass.
Celestia turned away from her image before looking off into the night sky. It was torn, however, as a white owl landed upon a perch near her, the mare’s eyes widening as she noticed it gripping something within its talons.
~
Ponyville Spa: Hot tubs
9:45 AM
“You what, darling?!”
Rarity’s eyes were as wide as dinner plates as she stared at the timid yellow pegasus in front of her, the yellow shy mare quickly hiding behind a part of her long pink mane that slipped from beneath the towel wrapped around her head, she whimpered softly before speaking again, a little louder then before...at least for her.
“I… I think I… Um… Like Sora…” Fluttershy repeated in as diminutive a voice as she thought she could get away with and still be heard.
Fluttershy and Rarity, despite the serious situation Equestria was in, had decided to continue with their spa dates as per usual. The fashionista loved the idea of getting prepped and prettied, due to needing a break from her current project that had kept her busy throughout the entirety of Sora’s recovery. And the animal caretaker needed something to take her mind off of her newfound revelation with her feelings towards a certain Keyblade-wielding pony/person.
Fluttershy had wanted to try to forget about it for the time being, but it soon became apparent to Rarity that the shy mare was acting shyer than normal, the knowledge from all of her romance novels clueing her in to all the signs that she was hiding something big. It wasn’t until Rarity practically whined within the hot tub that Fluttershy finally revealed her feelings for Sora.
Rarity stared blankly at her shy yellow friend before rushing to her side. Fluttershy gave a small ‘eep’ as she sunk into the water further, but stayed where she was. She doubted she could have escaped Rarity anyway, what with the look of seriousness the fashion-conscious pony had about her.
The fashionista sat back, a range of emotions flowing through her. On the one hoof, her normally shy and withdrawn friend had found a pony - a stallion, no less - that she had deep feelings for. On the other hoof, she somewhat had feelings for the very same stallion that she had been fantasizing about herself for the past week or so. This did not bode well for either of them, she suspected.
“Have you… told him yet?” Rarity asked in a calm, controlled voice, her smile seemingly as bright as ever. “Does he know?”
Fluttershy shook her head, muttering a soft ‘no’, though it was muffled by the heated water that had covered her lips.
Rarity had to force herself not to release the sigh of relief that had wanted to escape her, and, at the same time, mentally kick herself for her natural curiosity in all things that had to do with love. “And why ever not, dear?”
Fluttershy looked away before raising herself just enough above the water to be heard. “Well… I’m afraid to…”
“Fluttershy...” Rarity said softly with a tilt of her head. She knew that was more than likely the reason why Fluttershy had basically no real love life outside of her animal friends. Still, once again, her life of spending a bit of her free time within romantic fantasy novels pushed her to ask, “Why are you afraid, dear?”
The shy mare dipped her head. “What if…What if doesn’t like me in that way?”
Again Rarity’s curiosity got the better of her, something she needed to put a cork on one day. “Fluttershy dear, why would he not like a pony like you? Most stallions would find your shy and elusive personality charming, to say the least.”
“That’s just it, Rarity,” Fluttershy said as she looked away. “He’s not a pony.”
Rarity paused. Sora was indeed not a pony. Through the princess’s own magic, he was turned into one to better fit and hide in pony society, so as of right now, he truly was one, but for how long? She and her friends were assured by the Princess of the Sun herself that the spell on him was on its way to getting reversed once his work was done here, which also left another note she had failed to realize until just now.
“And even if he did like me, he’s not going to stay here,” Fluttershy added, her head hanging low.
It was at that moment that most of Rarity’s dreams came to a sudden halt. Yes, the stallion was amazing, even if he wasn’t technically a stallion in the pony sense. And yes, if someone was able to get past the fact that they were not technically of the same species and get him to consider being with a pony, would he really be able to stay with said pony? He had responsibilities not only to their world, but to, what she was told, countless worlds to stop whatever it was that was threatening them. And true to form, he seemed dead set on doing just that, even if it cost him his life.
Rarity’s gaze fell to Fluttershy, the yellow mare shivering despite the warmth all around them. “I thought about this all night Rarity. I really did,” she squeaked. “I can’t tell him.”
Rarity slowly slipped a hoof around the shivering mare, comforting her as best she could. To think that the shy mare could feel so strongly about another pony, and a stallion no less. She really is in love with him, isn't she?
The white mare genlty rubbed the shy mare's foreleg, “Fluttershy dear, tell me, what is it that made you like Sora so?”
The butter yellow mare wiped a hoof over her eyes before speaking. “When I first met him, he saved my life. Those…Shadows…They were coming after me, and he came to my rescue without hesitation. He protected me. No stallion has ever tried to protect me before.”
“You like him because he saved you?” Rarity asked, shaking her head. “Because he is a knight in shining armor? As much as I like the classics, dear, I don’t think that’s enough for one to admit that she’s in love.” Rarity cringed inwardly, knowing that her words bit her in the flank.
“I did try to write it off as that, I really did, but, then...and now, I would be around him more and more and the longer I knew him, the more I was around him, I could see that it was something more. He's nice...and kind. He would, in his own weird way, always try and lift our sprites. He always put his friends first, even if I do wish he would take care of himself more.”
“That...is an understatement darling,” Rarity mused with a role of his eyes. “If we don't watch him twenty-four seven I'm sure that he would land himself into some kind of trouble or another.” She then added, “Bless his heart.”
Fluttershy giggled softly. “Sad...but...true...”
The two shared a soft laugh before Fluttershy trailed off, sighing softly. She squeaked as Rarity placed a hoof on her shoulder, causing her to turn around.
“Fluttershy… Dear…Maybe you should go talk to him. Letting your dream stallion get away is never a good thing,” Rarity told her, her eyes shimmering slightly.
“B-But I can’t!” Fluttershy stammered, “I told you I-“
“What I heard,” Rarity interrupted her. “Was an excuse made by a mare afraid of her own feelings.” She smiled softly. “I won’t tell you what to do, darling, but it would be in your best interest to get those feelings out in the open as soon as you can. Somepony may just beat you to the punch if you don’t.”
"I...don't know Rarity...I..."
"Just think on it darling...for me."
The shy mare would nod slowly before looking off towards a nearby window, the sight of blue skies greeting her sight
~
Ponyville: Golden Oak Library
10:14 A.M.
Despite Sora slowly strolling down the shelves of books, his mind was quite clouded on what had happened the night before. His thoughts, his troubles, all forgotten due to the acts of one little shy mare he had walked home last night. He pressed a hoof to the spot she had been before, still feeling the warmth of her muzzle against his fur.
“Sora! Are you listening?”
He jumped at the sound of Twilight’s voice, smiling sheepishly at her as he turned to face her. “Heh… Sorry, Twilight. You were saying you found something odd?” He halfed guessed. He was pretty sure that was the reason she had called him down the the Library anyway.
Twilight huffed as she gave him a deadpan look. “I was saying the Elements of Harmony had been acting strangely ever since your battle with King Sombra. More specifically, the Elements of Laughter and Honesty are acting the most odd.”
“Is that why y’all called us over here as well, Twi?” Applejack asked as she peeked out from behind a book she had been looking through. “Cause our Elements are acting all funky-like?”
“Oh!” Pinkie exclaimed as she bounced excitedly around the room, stopping in-between Twilight and Sora. “Are they gonna come alive and shake their groove thing!?” She added emphasis to her words by wagging her tail in the air. Admittedly, in the direction Sora was facing, causing the boy to blush mightily and look away, scratching his cheek.
“No, Pinkie,” Twilight answered. “What I mean is, I’ve been monitoring the Elements ever since the battle with Sombra and I’ve picked up something new within the Elements of Laughter and Honesty.”
“Something new...” Sora repeated. “You think it has something to do with our fusion thing?”
“It would be speculation…” Twilight answered. “But it’s the most reasonable answer we have for now.”
“For those of us not as smart at figuring things out,” Applejack piped up. “What exactly is going on with the Elements?”
“Well,” Twilight began. “You know how magic is operated by a unicorn channeling their PKE energy into the focal point located upon their forehead, do you not?”
“Your horn lights up and you do magic?” Applejack summarized.
“Yeah, that,” Twilight said with an annoyed deadpan look. “Anyways, from what I can tell, the process we unicorns use when we channel our magic through our horns and the way the Elements’ inner magic is fluctuating are almost identical.”
“Twilight,” Applejack piped up, carefully choosing her next words. “If what y’all are telling me is what y’all are telling me, are you saying that if me and Pinkie put the Elements on right now, me and her can use magic?”
“That’s just it! I don’t know what would happen,” she said apprehensively as she looked back to Pinkie’s and Applejack’s elements that were upon the table. “There still so much I don’t know…So much I need to know. If I don’t know then…then…How can I…” She sighed and hung her head.
“I wouldn't worry about it so much, Twi,” Applejack tried to comfort her. “I doubt it will be anything bad if the Keyblade and Elements are connected like those two ponies told us.”
“But what if something bad does happen? What is the Keyblade doing to the elements?” Twilight asked.
The mare would perk up, as a hoof gently patted her upon her back. Looking behind, she saw the most comical and stupid sight she had ever seen.
Sora’s face was a few inches away from her face, the most hilarious expression she had ever seen plastered upon his features. He had effectively squashed his cheeks together with his hooves, causing his eyes to cross and his lips to pucker as he stuck his tongue out. A muffled, funny sound coming from his mouth.
Twilight, with all of her energy, tried her best to not laugh at the stallion in his face, quickly covering her mouth with both hooves as she held in her outburst, stifling it until undignified giggles slipped out. Pinkie, on the other hoof, was rolling on the floor laughing out loud at Sora, a snort here and there accompanying it every now and then. Applejack respectfully looked away as she withheld a chuckle of her own.
Pulling away, Sora smiled as he wiped a hoof across his muzzle, just under his nostrils. “In my experience, it’s best to roll with what you know and let the future handle the rest.”
Twilight’s gave him a mock deadpan stare. “Are you telling me to just wing it?”
“Works out for me!” Sora said as he pounded his chest.
“Not always relatively well if your story is anything to go by,” Twilight said.
Sora blushed as he scratched his cheek. “Hehe…Yeah…” His ears drooped slightly. “Guess you’re right. But I still stand by it.”
Twilight sighed before opening her mouth to say something, but stopped when a burp and a blast of green flame sounded off in the other room. There was a pregnant pause as everyone turned to face the source of the noise before a kiddish voice yelling “Twilight!” sounded off.
“Guess we gotta figure out what’s happening to the Elements later,” Applejack said as she made her way to the lavender unicorn. “If Spike’s voice is any indication, that’s not free trips to the day spa.”
Spike came bounding from around the corner, carrying a half-rolled letter with the Canterlot seal broken. "Twilight! There’s trouble! Like… Major with a capital M!"
"What is it, Spike?" Twilight asked, keeping the worry from her voice. "Have Heartless been spotted in Canterlot?"
"No!" the drake answered as he held out the letter for her. "But just as bad. Here!"
Twilight took the message from Spike and gave it a good once-over before widening her eyes.
"Twilight?" Applejack spoke up. "What's it say?"
Dear Twilight,
I am sorry that you and your friends have to be put through this, but there is a grave matter that needs to be looked into. I received a message late last night that has caused me more than enough worry. My guards report that Trottingham, the Old Castle Town, is blocked off with no way to break past the magic barrier that has been erected around it. I would go see to the trouble myself, but there has been something stirring within one of our neighboring kingdoms that has got my attention.
I am asking you not just as your princess, but as a friend: I need to know what is happening to my ponies.
Be careful, though, because I do believe that our recent enemy is at the head of this. And please tell Sora that I am sorry, but we may need him once again.
Your teacher and friend,
Princess Celestia of Equestria
"We… We need to go. Now," Twilight said as she stood from her seat.
Sora frowned as he summoned his Keyblade. “Right… Ready or not, we have work to do.”
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I really liked this chapter, especially with how Rarity wants Shy to confess to Sora despite also liking him. The return of Sora's funny face was nice. I like this chapter, but I feel you need an editor, as the are some spelling mistakes.
Well, it's Sora, so breaking through a locked gate, magical or not, shouldn't be too hard. Also, there were some *typos in there, at least one of which could be pinned on autocorrect.
this will be enlightening. the concept for the magic and elements is gonna be a nice twist.
There are TONS of ERRORS!
1-3)
1)The "L" in Fluttershy is capitalized
2)She knew that "it" was more than likely the reason why (The word "it" would fit to make the sentence flow better.)
3) “Why are you afraid dear?”
Oh my god, Merlin was actually Star Swirl who had been transformed into a pony. Oh dear god.
Does that make Merlin/Star Swirl immortal?
OBJECTION!
Valor Form locks out magic, AJ! Therefore, you would not have access to magic. However...
You might have access to combat skills like Strike Raid or Blitz!
TAKE THAT!
may wanna fix that when chu can
5658019
recipe for a drama novel or those mexican novelas.....
whats more interesting?
5658122
Or is it Starswirl that has been turned into a human?
This story is pretty good. I like it.
There is only one thing I would like to see in this story.
Sora meets Discord.
Sora meets Discord and needs to summon.
Sora meets Discord, needs to summon, and calls for Genie......
GG
~8chill
5658019 Wait other then pinkie, rarity, and shy. who likes sora?
5659555
Applebloom
Great chapter
! Please please ship sora and shy.
5659570 Oooooh! forgot about her. Thanks!
I smell a trap here. The heartless or Sunset wouldn't made such a big move unless they wanted Sora to come to them.
Is this by chance a correlation with: U w0t m8?
5662752
I see...sorry you don't like the story...I'll do better if I can
Sh!t about to fan time, here? Say, Anti-form making an appearance type of sh!t here? Yes, no, maybe?
5663292
Unless you received a downvote at the same time you received that comment, I wouldn't really interpret it as "I hate this story". It seems to be more of a "I hate this aspect of this story" kind of thing, which is entirely reasonable. I don't think the romance really works that well either in some respects, at least with certain characters. It's cute in some cases and cringe worthy in others for both cannon Sora and this story's version of him. Other aspects of the story that don't really gel well with me is the continual unimportance of the pony staff. Their characters are being portrayed correctly for the most part and their personalities are mostly intact as well, yet instances like the dome a few chapters back really rub me the wrong way. And then there's Riku, who could very well be what forces me to stop reading down the line depending on his actual role in things.
That having been said though, there are a few interesting aspects that keep me coming back. The way game mechanics like the drive forms are portrayed has been interesting, and I look forward to see what else comes from it. Character interactions have also been pretty spot on, give or take a few of your Sora's choices. Speaking of your Sora, it really is a separate being from the cannon but that's not completely bad. Having replayed KHII recently, I'm left begging to play with ANYONE more interesting then him. A break from the norm is pretty appreciated, and allows some of the romance angles to potentially kinda sorta work. Kinda sorta; it's still pretty weak in places but cute in others. I lean more towards cute so that works for me, but probably not so much for others.
The plot has been solid so far; taking us through parts of Equestria and connecting aspects of the universe to KH lore. I do honestly look forward to seeing where it goes next. Some of the villains are interesting, if not their motives so far, and the fights have been entertaining at parts.
I do like this story. It has problems like most fics but nothing yet has completely 'ruined' it for me. At times it threatens to dip into territories better left ignored, but I can overlook that and enjoy it for what it is.
Keep it up now.
5670878
Thanks for your input!
Having people/ponies like you tell me whats up is always good
5670912
NP. Feedback is always nice. Take note that my 'review' is based on the earlier version of the story, from before the edits
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/249920/2/the-conversion-bureau-worlds-where-it-wouldnt-work/world-two-lanes-between
Have you seen this? I love that KHMLP cross.
Do you have an editor? You need an editor.
“Buuuut?” The asked, raising an eyebrow.
I'm not sure, but I'm beginning to suspect this chapter is missing words.
Anyway, not very far in, btu I like what you've done with Merlin and foreshadowing Twilight going out there. I would have loved if this story had been about OC ponies, but no matter. It's a very fun story regardless... back to reading.
All too well old friend
if you ever want to return to Equestia, the door is always opened to you
And the quickest way for that is to see for her-self
Your one to talk, Mr. Wizard
With the magic that was upon the mirror died, returning back to its original purpose of just a looking glass
It was torn however as an white owl soon landed upon a perch
the reason why FLuttershy
Why are afraid dear
so as of right now his truly is one
even if he wasn’t technically a stallion in the pony since
Now it was at least getting a just of what each book may have been
Are they gonna come alive and shake their grove thing
Guess your right
Twiligth sighed before opening her mouth to say something
Theres trouble
Have Heartless been spoted in Canterlot
is blocked off with no way to brake past the magic barrier
but there has been something stering within one of our neighboring kingdoms that has got my attation
Princess Celestia of Equestira
1. Extra spacing.
2. Open.
3. Herself, one word.
4. You're.
5. With the magic upon the mirror dispelled it returned back to its original purpose of just a looking glass.
6. A.
7. Extra capitalisation.
8. Why are you afraid dear.
9. He.
10. Sense.
11. Gist.
12. Groove.
13. You're.
14. Twilight. And extra spacing at the end.
15. There's.
16. Spotted.
17. Break.
18. Stirring, Attention.
19. Equestria.
Kinda sad that till now, the mistakes are still present... It does draw away from the story quite abit sadly.
HOLY S**T YENSID IS STARSWIRL!!!
Oof. This chapter needs an editing pass. Badly. Whole lot of tense shifting, a whole lot of missing words, and a whole lot of your/you're, then/than, and general typos.
Your more recent chapters have been better, so it makes it stick out all the more.
5751013
I liked gow that got worked in there too.
5811067 thank you for correcting me, I was commenting from memory. I'll make sure to check my facts next time.
the something or "the" needs to be "he"
"he" not "his"
double space
attention
You mention that the person Celestia is speaking too has glasses and a large blue hat. Frankly, this seems to imply not that Yen Sid is Starswirl the Bearded, but rather....
Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter universe...
Yen Sid doesn't wear glasses...
have you been taking influence from my stories?
5892842
heh...no...just think...he's old...has a beard...wares glasses...pointy hat...wares blue...and he's part of disney
5895971
Except that Yen Sid doesn't wear glasses.
I have the proof right here!
33.media.tumblr.com/37f2246cf3d7cfa54de166067f4fc033/tumblr_inline_nmpe1o0XQ21syxdqa_500.gif
vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/kingdomhearts/images/6/61/Yensid_BBS.png/revision/latest?cb=20100107231323
img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20140423104139/aceattorney/images/8/89/Take_that.png
5896132
IT'S MERLIN!!!!!!! HE'S IMPLYING THAT MERLIN IS STAR SWIRL HERE! You know, Merlin from the Sword and the Stone? Forgive me for giving that away, but I felt this needed to be nip in the bud here.
5896546
Woops...total deep moment there...
Haven't played KH as of late... Been watching a lot of Harry lately...
5896546
heh
Just a little one i noticed here. The right one is break- to become broken, Not brake - to stop
I'm really glad that you are still around, when i re-read the story I will comment on all the little mistakes that haven't been found yet. Thanks for writing a good story, though it could still go on after two years of nothing.
5902895
yeah I do need to get my butt in gear right
please continue the story
wallspick.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/Brown-Cute-Cat-640x480.jpg
AH... I found a video that maybe we can interest you
What do you think abaut it ?
maybe unicornus was a real Alicorn from Equestria before the birth of the princess .
what would explain the ' interest of xheanort for that place
Man I really hope you're still working on this story.
5963927
I really am
5965635 that's great to hear. Guess I should be patient then, just like everyone I guess don't really like waiting. This story has been a fun read so far though keep up the good work.
Finished! I must say I like it.
You do have major spelling and grammar errors that should be corrected, but I just love how you 'painted' your story. 
Update?
5965635 bro.... I might just have a man crush on you. Th Is story is FANTASTIC!
6227061
Hey. Thanks dude. And thanks for loving my story
6223404
It's the test song
6231502 What's the next story then mate
6297633
Work and other projects like to get in my way...still I am still doing this one so don't fret...but I can tell you me and a friend are doing a Final Fantasy x mlp story...so that's what's really taking up my time
6299808 Hmm interesting
Good luck with that
Live Long And Prosper